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A Brief History of the Racist Autobots Exiled from Transformers 3

My heart can’t take all this bad news today! First, Jeff Fahey attempted to drag me out of denial , forcing me to finally acknowledge that Lost’s Frank Lapidus was really, truly dead. (But we didn’t see a body, Jeff!) Now, Michael Bay has revealed that the racist, gold-toothed Autobots named Mudflaps and Skids will not be returning to Transformers 3 after their jaw-dropping introduction in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen . Though I have no doubt that Bay will replace them with something equally mind-boggling, I think we need to pay those two their due first.

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A Brief History of the Racist Autobots Exiled from Transformers 3

Grinhouse

You Again Trailer: Can Sigourney Weaver and Betty White Rescue Kristen Bell’s Catfight Comedy?

If there’s anything I’ve learned from reading Jezebel , it’s that women love paparazzi pictures of celebrities but hate the assumption that they can’t get along with each other. How to explain, then, the preponderance of movies like Mean Girls, Bride Wars , and the new Kristen Bell comedy You Again , which suggest women are never more entertaining then when they’re taking each other down?

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You Again Trailer: Can Sigourney Weaver and Betty White Rescue Kristen Bell’s Catfight Comedy?

Letterman Extortionist Goes to Jail

And now, a cautionary tale for all the aspiring blackmailers out there. Robert “Joe” Halderman, the former CBS producer who tried to shake down David Letterman for $2 million, started his 6 month jail sentence today. Halderman pled guilty to attempted grand larceny in March and agreed to complete 1,000 hours of community service as part of his punishment. [ AP ]

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Letterman Extortionist Goes to Jail

Jimmy Fallon to Host Emmys

Neil Patrick Harris may have triumphed as the 2009 Emmys emcee, but now it’s NBC’ s turn to broadcast the show, and they’re selecting Jimmy Fallon to host the 2010 ceremony on August 29. Does this mean we’ll see a tuxedo-aided beer pong rematch with Betty White? What about a suspiciously choreographed Auto-Tune sketch ? Both will be fine distractions when Mad Men ‘s Matthew Weiner goes up to receive at least two more trophies. [ The Wrap ]

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Jimmy Fallon to Host Emmys

Iron Man 2, Secret J.J. Abrams Film Literally Locked Up Together

You may already know what the secret scene at the end of Iron Man 2 is, but that won’t stop Paramount from taking some pretty extraordinary measures to protect that and yet another secret J.J. Abrams stunt from reaching viral audiences early.

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Iron Man 2, Secret J.J. Abrams Film Literally Locked Up Together

Judge Agrees to Hear Jersey Shore Lawsuit

A judge in, well, New Jersey has agreed to hear a case against the producers of Jersey Shore , who are accused of profiting off fights provoked deliberately for MTV’ s cameras. The claim was brought on behalf of three plaintiffs involved in drunken throwdowns with Ronnie Magro; the judge will eventually determine if the producers conduct “violated New Jersey’s racketeering statute.” Racketeering! A new Jersey Shore milestone. This calls for a binge drink. [ AP ]

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Judge Agrees to Hear Jersey Shore Lawsuit

Bill Condon Has Heard Enough of Your Questions Now, Twilight Fans

Twilight Nation has been hormonally atwitter ever since Bill Condon was announced as Summit Entertainment’s choice to direct the franchise’s final installment Breaking Dawn . Attempting to harness this energy over the weekend, the Oscar-winner invited fans to submit questions and concerns about the undertaking ahead. That’s probably the last time he’ll do that.

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Bill Condon Has Heard Enough of Your Questions Now, Twilight Fans

What’s On: Jersey Girls

The return of Real Housewives of New Jersey should signal a rebirth in your household. You should already feel better about your friendship and parenting skills, not to mention relieved that your first ex never penned a tell-all about your cocaine and prostitution-related past. Movieline’s staff exhales with you, unless you’re Danielle Staub, in which case we sympathize from a distance.

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What’s On: Jersey Girls

Fran Drescher Threatens to Host Talk Show

A few months ago, Fran Drescher was rumored to be in talks with Fox News and MSNBC about hosting a politics-centered chat show. And last night, the former Nanny star announced her upcoming project on Twitter. (Note: if you are prone to migraines, do not read ahead.) Drescher tweeted, “OMG I ate peach cobler w hm made vanilla ice crm. 2moro got2 b redy @9:30am 4cancer event. Thn hm. Mis BF &dog. I’m doin a sumer tlk shw BTW. ” [ @frandrescher via The Wrap ]

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Fran Drescher Threatens to Host Talk Show