Dear Bossip , I’m 26-years old, and the mother of two beautiful daughters ages 6 and 3 years old. My story, to keep it brief, is I met my kid’s father almost 7 years ago. Our relationship, you can say, went from zero to one hundred real quick. Within three months we were living together, and I was pregnant with our first child. I was completely in love with life. Everything was going great, so I thought. As years went on I started to notice he was verbally abusive. That later became physical, not just on his end but mine as well. I’m bipolar and I never told him. Once my anger reaches a point I go into a state where it becomes sometimes uncontrollably. I later left once I become more emotionally stable. Now, two years later we are still together, but still no ring. I’m ready for the next chapter in life. We both have changed, but he is still hesitant about the thought of marriage. So, now we are in year 7 and he always says, “Yeah, baby, we gonna get married it just takes time.” Or, he says, “Baby, we gonna get married. We working on it, just take it one day at a time.” Which I understand, but at what point do I say no. No more waiting. We aren’t currently living together and I was recently offered a job out of state. I’m torn because I do love him and I do want us to be a family. But, I’m conflicted should I stay and wait? Leave and begin my new book as a single mother? – She Just Doesn’t Know Dear Ms. She Just Doesn’t Know , Accept the job offer and leave. Start over, begin a new life, and the new chapter in your life. You’ve been down this road of waiting on him. And, I’m sorry, but there are no pit stops along the way where you have to wait on a man, especially one who doesn’t think of you seriously, or your relationship. Ma’am, you’ve endured the abuse, on both of your ends, and, even though you mentioned things are better now, there is still no ring. So, why wait? Seven years later, and he still can’t make up his mind on whether or not he wants to get married? Uhm, no! This is not how this works. Why keep you on hold saying it takes time? You’ve given him 7 years and a child. You’ve invested in him, and you’ve been through hell and back. But, you’re not worth it to get married despite everything you’ve gone through with him? Get the freak out of here! If it hasn’t gotten better now, it won’t. If he is waiting on some miraculous sign to give him the “a-okay” to get married, it’s not going to happen. And, what are you working on before you get married? Are you in pre-marital counseling? Is he getting help for his anger, and abusive behavior? Are you therapy for your bipolar, and have you told him since you’ve kept it from him? If you haven’t done any of the above that I just mentioned, then why get married? Seriously!?! There is no need to marry this man if neither of you are working on yourselves, in therapy, and getting the necessary treatment you both clearly need. Therefore, you’ll just be spinning your wheels if you stay there and continue waiting on him. MOVE! LEAVE! Here is the opportunity, a blessing in disguise, to move on, start a new chapter in your life, and begin anew. A window of opportunity has opened, hell, a door is being propped open, so why not take it? You won’t know until you do it! Simply do it and watch other miraculous blessings open up, and new things begin to appear. Take the chance. Go and do you and for the first time really, and I mean really get to know what happiness, self-love, love, joy, happiness, and peace will be like without him. This is the time to invest in you and your child. Make the investment. You can sit there and wait on him all you want. You can ask until you’re blue in the face. If he isn’t ready, then nothing will make him do what he doesn’t want to do. And, simply, he doesn’t want to get married. He’s shown you, told you, and continues to be about him. Sure, he may love you, but marrying you is not what he wants. So, love you and your child enough to walk away, chuck up the deuces and give this new life a try. You have nothing to lose. And, I’m sure he will want to come back and want to be all up in your face talking about marriage once you start talking about moving. Well, too late. He had his chance. Now, it’s time to do you. – Terrance Dean Hey Bossip Fam, what do you think? Share your opinions and thoughts below! Also, e-mail all your questions Terrance Dean: loveandrelationships@bossip.com Follow Terrance Dean on Twitter: @ terrancedean and “LIKE” Terrance Dean on Facebook, click HERE! Make sure to order my books Mogul: A Novel (Atria Books – June 2011; $15); Hiding In Hip Hop (Atria Books – June 2008); and Straight From Your Gay Best Friend – The Straight Up Truth About Relationships, Love, And Having A Fabulous Life (Agate/Bolden Books – November 2010; $15). They are available in bookstores everywhere, and on Amazon, click HERE!
Dear Bossip , I’m currently in a relationship with a man who has a daughter. I on the other hand don’t have any children. I met him about 5 years ago and we dated. I specifically asked him was he ready to be in a relationship, he told me no. So, I began dating other people. I was showing him some pictures in my phone and he continued scrolling through my pictures and came across a picture of a guy and he flipped out. After that incident we went our separate ways. All communication between us was cut off. Fast forward about 2 ½ years and he decided to send me a message on Facebook. We got together and caught up. When I met him 5 years ago he didn’t have any children. Now, he has a 1 year old. I was real leery of getting involved with a guy with kids, but honestly this child has made an honest man out of him. I just love seeing him be a great father. That was a year ago. Now, we’re in a committed relationship. About a month or two ago we were over his parent’s home and to my surprise his mom pulled me to the side and told me that he’s expecting twins with his child’s mother. I had no clue of this. He didn’t mention this to me at all before we decided to make our relationship official. I asked him about it and he told me that he doesn’t really think she’s pregnant. He also told me that if she is pregnant he’s going to get a DNA test on the children. When his child’s mother was pregnant with his first child she confessed to him that she wasn’t sure if the baby was his. He got a DNA test and it proved the child is his. To bring things up to speed, his sister came out and said that his child’s mother is expecting twin boys. Now, I’m positive she’s pregnant and he’s probably the father. Now, that we’re in a relationship I’m not sure if I can handle being in a relationship with someone with three small children. I’m in my early 20s with my Bachelors degree and I plan on furthering my education – Should I Walk Away Dear Ms. Should I Walk Away , Uhm, sweetie, if his child’s mother is pregnant with twins right now, then, uhm, you do realize that he cheated on you while he was in a committed relationship with you. So, why wouldn’t you confront him about his infidelity? SMDH! I don’t understand why some of you will go back to an ex after years of being broken up, and being separated. Just because someone from your past reaches out to you on Facebook, or any social media outlet, it doesn’t mean you have to respond. It doesn’t mean you have to go back and try to make it work again. If it didn’t work the first time, then it’s not going to work the second time around. Why go back and get into the same mess you left? They are an ex for a reason. UGH!!! Now, here you are, a grown woman, with some education, and doing things for yourself, and your ex is still doing the same –ish he was doing years ago. He has a small child, and now his same baby momma is pregnant with twins. You and he were together at the time of her conception, which means he was cheating on you with her. So, Ms. Smarty-Pants, what do you think you should do? Do you think you should stay with this man who cheated on you with his baby momma? Do you want to be with this man who will have three small children, yet, you have none? Do you want to deal with his baby momma drama? Do you want to deal with him not having any money to take you out because all of his income will be going toward his three children? Leave. Get out of the relationship. The reason his mother and sister both told you that he is expecting twins is because they both know he ain’t –ish, and they don’t want to see him mess up your life. You seem like you have your head on your shoulders and you’re a good and wonderful person, and they are protecting you and giving you the red signs to take heed and leave his bum a**. You’re young, you have a lot going for you, and a lot to look forward to, and one of them is not being in a relationship with a man who has three small children, and dealing with baby momma drama. He cannot do anything for you. He will be forever on child support, and he will not be able to take you out, buy you anything, or do anything special with you because he has to deal with his children, his responsibilities as a dad and parent, and giving his money to her. Why stay with a man who cannot commit himself fully to you emotionally, mentally, and physically? Do yourself a favor and get out of the relationship, delete him out of your life, and focus on you. Focus on your life, and be thankful that you are not baby momma number two, and having to deal with his other child’s mother and you being pregnant. Be thankful that his mother and sister warned you, and hipped you to him and his trifling ways. Girl, buy them some flowers and send them a thank you note. Then, I’m going to need for you to stop responding to exes who reach out to you on social media. Stop going backward and repeating the same behaviors over and over again. They are an ex for a reason. Move forward. Life is about moving ahead, forward, and not backward. You stay in this relationship, then don’t be surprised by the drama you will experience and the stress you will encounter. It will be at your own demise. – Terrance Dean Hey Bossip Fam, what do you think? Share your opinions and thoughts below! Also, e-mail all your questions Terrance Dean : loveandrelationships@bossip.com Follow Terrance Dean on Twitter : @terrancedean and “LIKE” Terrance Dean on Facebook , click HERE! Make sure to order my books Mogul: A Novel (Atria Books – June 2011; $15); Hiding In Hip Hop (Atria Books – June 2008); and Straight From Your Gay Best Friend – The Straight Up Truth About Relationships, Love, And Having A Fabulous Life (Agate/Bolden Books – November 2010; $15). They are available in bookstores everywhere, and on Amazon, click HERE!
Music video by Justin Bieber performing Unconditional. (C) 2014 The Island Def Jam Music Group iTunes: http://smarturl.it/iUnconditional Amazon: http://smarturl.it/aUnconditional Justin… http://www.youtube.com/v/xbqjC4uoPig?version=3&f=videos&app=youtube_gdata Original post: Justin Bieber – Unconditional ft. Selena Gomez (Audio) (NEW SONG 2014) (Official Music Video) Lyrics
Attention, little kids everywhere. We have a little bit of advice for you today. Don’t try to forge your mom’s signature on a permission slip or other document unless you know her actual name, and can spell it. Because “Mommy” is probably not it. Just a hunch, based on this classic image from Reddit. Not too convincing. Does make for a hilarious addition to our Little Kid Notes gallery, though: 13 Hilarious Kid Notes Open Slideshow 1. Mommy Signature This little kid tried to forge his mom’s signature. Pretty amazing. View As List 1. Mommy Signature This little kid tried to forge his mom’s signature. Pretty amazing. 2. I Hate Chris! Sorry Ben. I was aiming for someone else … 3. Elementary School Love Letter This elementary school love letter, and the recipient’s response, tells you all there is to know about love among the single-digit set. 4. 30 Boyfriend Rules This little kid has already figured out 30 essential rules any potential boyfriend must abide by. Take heed! 5. Kid’s Insane Christmas Letter Drew Magary’s daughter wrote an insane Christmas list. He wrote an insanely hilarious response. 6. Dear Santa Amazon Letter A kid wrote the full Amazon URL on his Dear Santa letter. In crayon. He’s dedicated. 7. Stinky Kid Note Check out this note written by a Buffalo, N.Y., teacher with regard to the alleged stinky nature of the kids in her class. 8. Kid Poem About Sister This little kid wants his sister out of the house, as this poetry makes abundantly clear. 9. #1 Dad Note An adorable note written from a 12-year-old to the single man who adopted him. It brings a tear to your eye … 10. Note to Dad An adorable note written from a 12-year-old to the man who adopted him. 11. Kid Writes Get Well Note This kid’s get well note for his teacher is chock full of helpful advice. 12. Cute Kid Note Check out this cute note written by a little kid to his dad. He meant “cook.” 13. Hilarious Apology Note This note was written by an eight-year old. He used to really hate one of his brothers. At least the offending youngster in question had the best of intentions, or wanted to make us believe that Mommy was very happy when she signed the letter.
Dear Bossip , I actually have a gay best friend, as cliché as it seems, and we have actually been friends for five years now and are as close as can be. We work on many work-related projects with one another. We spend Friday nights together. We go out and pick-up guys. And, we share every low and high time together. So, when he told me that he had been in love with me for three years you can imagine my shock. He was leaving for an internship in Arizona for five months and in light of this event we had dinner to exchange, gifts, thoughts, and goodbyes. The card I read, and it is not something I can ever forget, “I waited because I didn’t know how you would react, but “Cindy” I love you.” My entire existence turned 180 degrees. In shock, I didn’t say anything. I just cried and exchanged hugs. On the way to the airport I could no longer contain myself and I asked him if he meant it like that. Of course he did and we discussed what it meant for the two of us. He had loved me for three years now, and he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. He said he would never risk hurting me, and couldn’t lose me as a best friend and if we got there as a life-long partner. What it came down to was, “I’m attracted to men, but I’m in love with a woman.” So, he didn’t really love me, he just had a deep affection for me (?) We arrived at the airport, and he kissed me, took his luggage, and left for Arizona. I got in my car with the anger of all the lands in my eyes. How could he tell me this and then leave? Send the world shattering then make me pick up the pieces? Tell me he wants me for life than say maybe not? I am so angry at him for copping out. I’m so angry with him for not having a solution, and I am so angry at him for saying, “maybe not.” Because I do believe he loves me. In fact, he is not the first person to tell me that my gay best friend has gone straight for me. After discussing this with a close friend, and if the things he told me are true, then it must also be true that there is some sort of attraction. When I fall asleep he holds my hands and yanks them away before I wake-up. He drops everything for me. He told me that the only secret he ever kept from me could destroy our relationship. He told me that he got involved with men at a young, confusing, depressive stage in his life and it may have given him solace when he really needed it. But, also it may have led him to believe he was a homosexual. Even more, he has never enjoyed any of his sexual encounters. At a time in his life when everything was changing, his sexuality in what he had as a stabilizer. The close friend even believes that his recent streak of promiscuity was probably in an effort to assure himself that he was gay. Moreover, he just said he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. That he’s been in love with me for three years. So, while it’s possible that he does not love me, and that he’s merely confused, I do believe that he is in fact in love with me. Yet, he had no plan, no solution, and he didn’t know what he wants to do. He would have to stop seeing guys, he would have to date me, and he would have to be open to heterosexual attraction. However, these are conclusions I have come to after he has left, after it has been left up to him. Moreover, these are conclusions I have come to, not him. So I’m sure you are going to ask, “Do you love him?” Well, I don’t know, but I think I may. I’ve never felt that way about him, but I have a very tight reign on my emotions, so it would be natural that I would never open up that door to a gay man. I felt in those thirty seconds my world shift. Something I’ve never felt before. I think I do love him, but I don’t want to say that if he doesn’t love me. In the meantime, he is gone. I am angry. I am confused. I don’t know what to do. I need him to be my best friend. I need him to figure this out too. – Confused Gay/Straight Love Dear Ms. Confused Gay/Straight Love , I guess I’m at a loss as well. I mean, your gay best friend, the man you pick up guys with, spend lots of quality together, and have been there through thick and thin, confesses his undying love for you and then jets off to another state. And, you’re wondering if you love him, and if he could “really” love you because for all you know he is gay. Also, you want to know how to move forward, and where do you put your feelings and emotions because he has left you hanging. Well, let’s see here: He is gay. He is and has been in intimate relationships with men. As far as you know he’s never been with a woman, and told you that he is attracted to men. Therefore, he is gay. He shared with you that when he was young, he went through a confusing and depressive stage and as a result he found solace in being with men. Hmmm, so, he found solace by sleeping with men? Or, was he confused and depressive because he was fighting his desires, and knew he was gay, but because he was young and it was hard for him to accept his sexuality. He desperately wanted to resist his desires, and he probably really wanted to be like his friends, and desire women. But, he knew he was different. He was afraid of losing his friends, and loved ones. He didn’t want to be ostracized by those he loved, and he really and truly wanted to be accepted for who he was. However, he was unable to resist his desires and began sleeping with men. But, later, he regretted it because like most men who are struggling with their sexuality, they resent and regret the act afterward because they are uncomfortable and unhappy in their own skin. They hate that they give in to their urges, desire, and true nature. They fight, hoping and wishing it will go away, but it doesn’t. It grows stronger, and then they start developing feelings, emotions, and physical attractions. And, no matter how hard they don’t want to be gay, it’s just their DNA. It’s just who they are. But, this is just my assumption. I have no doubt that he loves you. However, I feel that his love is not a romantic love, but a endearing love for a best friend, a confidante. He loves you because you allow him to feel comfortable in his skin and he can be himself without you casting any judgment and criticism on him. You accept him for who he is, and this gives him the freedom to be himself. Therefore, it explains his loyalty to you. He will do anything for you. He enjoys your company. He loves that he can share anything with you. You his open ear, shoulder to lean on, and comforter. And, he does not want to lose his best friend because you are the one person who loves him unconditionally. Yet, these feelings and emotions he has for you can easily be misconstrued or confused with romantic love. You have given him the space and comfort to express a love that he truly desires to share with another man. But, he has been unsuccessful in his quest for romantic relationships with men. And, this is due to his fear of actually being in love with another man because he is not in love with himself. Until he learns to love himself, and love who he is, then he will continue to sabotage his relationships with men, and continue to struggle to have any requited love with another man. His promiscuity is his search for acceptance of himself. He is acting out sexually only because he refuses to allow himself to be his true authentic self – A gay man. You are the only source of stability he has, and therefore he loves the stability you give him. His desires to be with men, his attraction to men, and his unsuccessful relationships with men has been and will continue to be his struggle unless he comes to terms with his sexuality, and accepts who he is. So, with that, let’s address the fact that you mentioned that you are not sure if you love him, and you’ve never looked at him in that way and you’ve never felt that way about him. You also mentioned that because you’ve always known him to be gay, and you cannot open yourself up to be with a gay man. Then, I think you have your answer on where this is going, and what to do next. I do agree that he should not have dumped this on you, and then left with no explanation, and no resolution. That was selfish, but then again he has led his life selfishly, particularly when it comes to his emotions and feelings. Notice the trail of men he has left behind, and how he has not had any successful relationships with men. And, now you’re in that mix. If you love someone you don’t do what he did to you by confessing his undying love for the past three years, and then leave in some dramatic fashion as he made his exit. That’s a drama queen! But, again, and because he doesn’t know how to handle emotions, and other people’s feelings, especially his own, he did what he only knew best how to do. He ran, left you to pick up the pieces, and left you with unanswered questions. That’s what he has always done, and will continue to do until he gets help, into therapy and counseling, and deal with his sexuality head on. He runs when things get too intense. He runs when it’s time to confront himself and his feelings. You don’t have time for this, and you should assess the situation for what it truly is: He is a gay man trying to find himself. He is running from his emotions, feelings, and true desires, and his love for you is not some romantic, physical, endearing love. It is a friend’s deep love who truly cares for, supports, and encourages another friend. You can call him, and let him know you are there for him, and that he should get into therapy and counseling with a specialist in an LGBT center in Arizona. He can talk with someone who can help him redirect his feelings and emotions, and hopefully resolve his issues of fear and hatred of himself. And, you can also begin picking up the shattered pieces he left you with, and put your life and yourself back together. You love him, but you are not in love with him. This incident just stunned you, temporarily put you into a tailspin, and had you reconsidering some things between the two of you. You’ve been a good friend who supported, nurtured, and allowed him to be himself without any question. That’s what he needed, and you gave that to him. Now, it’s time to love yourself, be good to you, and provide yourself with the same unconditional love. – Terrance Dean Hey Bossip Fam, what do you think? Share your opinions and thoughts below! Also, e-mail all your questions Terrance Dean : loveandrelationships@bossip.com Follow Terrance Dean on Twitter : @terrancedean and “LIKE” Terrance Dean on Facebook , click HERE! Make sure to order my books Mogul: A Novel (Atria Books – June 2011; $15); Hiding In Hip Hop (Atria Books – June 2008); and Straight From Your Gay Best Friend – The Straight Up Truth About Relationships, Love, And Having A Fabulous Life (Agate/Bolden Books – November 2010; $15). They are available in bookstores everywhere, and on Amazon, click HERE!
Do you agree? Jesse Jackson Blames Wall Street Discrimination For Black Unemployment Jesse Jackson is speaking out to identify patterns of of long-running economic discrimination that he says is keeping unemployment numbers high among African-Americans. He had this to say on the topic in a recent interview with WPIX New York : Well you have Wall Street and Harlem on the same island. And when you think about Yahoo and Ebay and companies like Amazon with no blacks on the board, that’s a great disparity. Beyond the issue of freedom, we’re free but not equal, the disparities keep growing. It happens because of discrimination. You have patterns that target race discrimination. For example, for many people, their first business was their home. But when these banks foreclosed on homes after subprime lending, the banks got bailed out but the people got left out. We embraced the dream but we didn’t embrace the civil rights. You have to enforce equal opportunity [employment] and affirmative action. For example, what does it mean that 50 years later, there are zero black owners of Coca-Cola franchises? ONE owner of a Pepsi-Cola franchise? 20,000 automobile dealerships and only 200 are black? NFL and there’s not one black owner; [professional] baseball not one; only one in basketball. These patterns of economic segregation have basically been left off of the table. These are patterns of economic discrimination. Do you agree with Rev. Jesse Jackson’s theory on economic discrimination? Let’s discuss.
Dear Bossip , We met through my cousin about a year ago. We clicked immediately, and the chemistry was over whelming. I was single and he said he didn’t have a girlfriend. So, we dated for about a month and everything was perfect. Then, one Sunday, a chick shows up at his house — THE GIRLFRIEND. He apologized for lying to me. He said he lied because he was no longer in love with her, and he just didn’t know how to break up with her. But, he broke up with her that evening. So, things got back on track. We got very close, and we were in a relationship. I was introduced to his friends and vice-versa he met mine. Eight Months down the line he tells me he can’t take it to the next level because his not ready to be a step dad. I have a child and he doesn’t. He said he can’t take the relationship to the next level because his parents will disapprove and he wants to settle down, but he’s not sure if his ready to settle down with someone with a kid. I was hurt because he waited 8 months to tell me this. We broke it off. A week later we got back together. I don’t know why I did that but I did. I loved him too much. We continued dating, even though he still showed no interest in getting to know my little one. I hung on hoping our love was strong enough to overcome this, and that he would come around, which he didn’t. He gave me so much love and attention, but, he just was not showing any interest in getting to know my daughter. I was hopeful because I didn’t want another failed relationship so I hung on. Then, one day he asked me to check something on his Facebook page. I went to his inbox, and then BOOM! He is seeing someone else who is childless. I confronted him about this. He didn’t deny it. He admitted that he’d been seeing her and she asked him out and he fell for it. And, yes he was falling for her. She is educated and young and childless. So, I said what’s going to happen to us? He said he loves me and he’s not about to let me go, and he wants to settle down and he’s trying her out. So, I told him I will not share him. I broke it off. We share mutual friends and we were both invited to a Braai. He came with her. I was heartbroken nonetheless. I couldn’t show him I was hurting. I carried on having a great time and he texted me during the Braai while he was with her telling me how great I looked. I texted back and said, “Thanks, she looks great too.” He asked if we could talk outside and I went to talk to him. He told me that he loved me still and he can’t seem to forget about me. He said he can’t stop thinking about me, and we kissed. We left together and he left her there. We had sex, and months later I learned I was pregnant. He said we couldn’t keep it. I agreed. I aborted the child. He was very supportive, took me to counseling, and spent all this time with me to make sure I got back on my feet. He suggested I enroll part-time in school so I can get my degree as I’m working a fairly good job. I just don’t have any form of education. He’s paying for it. But, he is still with her. He says he loves me and wants me in his life, but he just can’t marry someone with a child. Do I walk away or stick around? He’s 28-years old, and I’m hoping that maybe in time he will embrace the situation because we keep breaking up, but we end up getting back together somehow. We are like best friends. He even says that he’s never had a relationship where he felt so close with someone on that level where he can talk about absolute anything. We are into the same things, and we perfect together. – He Won’t Accept My Child Dear Ms. He Won’t Accept My Child , Sigh! Rejection is a bish! Honestly, there is nothing I will tell you, say to you, or recommend in which you will listen or take heed because you are too wrapped up into him. You are strung out, and unfortunately there is no rehab or treatment to help you from, “penisamilization.” See, being addicted to penisamilization will make you lose all your thinking and mental faculties, and you will make irrational judgments and decisions. You are unable to decipher between right and wrong, or good and evil. You neglect your loved ones, and will put yourself in harm’s way, (including having unprotected sex, aborting a child he doesn’t want, and neglecting your own child), despite the alarming red signals, signs, and treatment from the man behind penisamilization. You are willing to continue pursuing a relationship with a man who has told you repeatedly that he is not interested in being with someone who has a child. He has made no effort in getting to know your child, refuses to meet her, and he was so adamant about it that he went out and found another woman who was childless and began dating her. He didn’t tell you about her, however, he instructed you to his Facebook page to make the big reveal. WOW! WOW! WOW! But, let’s look at this man’s pattern with you. One month into dating him, he lied about being in a relationship, and it wasn’t until his girlfriend popped up at his house that you learned about her. Yet, you continued to sleep with him, hoping for a relationship with him. SMDH! Months later, he tells you that he can’t take your relationship to the next level because he doesn’t want to be with someone who has a child. He didn’t tell you this upfront, but waited months later to tell you this. Therefore, he manipulated you, lied to you, and led you to believe that you were moving toward a serious relationship when in actuality he was simply using you. As he was when you first started dating. Yet, you continued dating him, hanging on, hoping he would change his mind. SMDH! Then, he tells you to check his Facebook page where he announces that he is in another relationship with another woman, and she is childless, but, he loves you and is trying her out to see where it goes. Trying her out? Trying her out! This man had the gall and nerve to say that he loves you, wants to be with you, yet, he is trying out another woman? Girl, I can’t with you! This man is never honest and upfront with you. He lies about everything. He plays you, and makes you look like a fool. He knows you lack self-esteem because you keep taking him back, and remain hopeful of something he’s told you time and time again: He doesn’t want a relationship with you, and will not take it to the next level with you because he doesn’t want a woman with a child. Yet, you stick around, continuing to open your legs, and let him run up in you raw. Penisamilization is a helluva addiction. Yet, it gets better. You meet up at a gathering, and he shows up with her, but he leaves with you and he leaves her there? If he will come to an event with another woman, yet, leave with you, then this is indicative of his behavior in how he treats women. He uses women for his own disposal, plays with your emotions and feelings (refer back to his girlfriend he had while dating you, and now he is dating another woman and didn’t tell you upfront, nor did he tell her about you). Yet, you make yourself accessible to him because you want to prove how loyal you are. Honestly, you left with him and felt happy because for once he chose you, instead of rejecting you. And, this validated you, and made you feel good about yourself. Unfortunately, you felt you were getting over on the other woman because he left with you. He chose you. SMDH! Weak-minded, delusional and insecure women like you are easily manipulated and men will continue to take advantage of you. Then, you have sex with him, and months later discover you’re pregnant. He tells you to abort the baby, and you do because you agree with him? How can you awake each day and look at yourself and think you are remotely intelligent, smart, or have any type of common sense, and call yourself a woman and mother? Penisamilization is real people. It will have you doing ignorant, dumb, stupid –ish like this woman all in the efforts of attempting and hoping to keep a man. His game is so tight and pimped out, that he has led you to believe the lie you tell yourself every day you awake that one day he will come to his senses and accept your child, and that you will live happily ever after. IT WON’T HAPPEN. IT’S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. You are, and forever will be a side piece. His side chick. You are reserved p***y. You are his backup plan, his dumb down, basic chick who will never ever be the main chick. Do you realize that every woman he meets who is childless, has a career, and educated is his come up from you? They are constant reminders that he can do better than you. And, he will always throw it up in your face and remind you of the fact that you have a child. And, every time he introduces you to the new women in his life, he will point out that you have a child, you are uneducated, you have a basic job, and your life is basic. He’s already told you that his parents will disapprove of him having a relationship with a woman with a child. And, though he wants to settle down, he’s told you that he doesn’t want to settle down with you. Therefore, what are you hoping and waiting around for? What exactly do you think will happen or change his mind about this fact? The man made you abort a child because he knew it would trap him and you will forever be tied to him. He doesn’t love you. He despises you. He despises your child. Ma’am, he doesn’t want to meet your child, and refuses to meet your child (Rejection). And, you continue to choose this man over your child. Every time you lay with him, having unprotected sex knowing he is sleeping with other women, and he has a full-on relationship with another woman, yet, he won’t leave her and told you that he is not leaving her, however, he won’t settle down with you because you have a child, and that is something he doesn’t want (Rejection). Do you realize that every time he rejects you and your daughter, and you keep hoping, wishing, praying, and desiring for him to choose you, however, you are choosing him over your own child? You are neglecting the well-being of your own child for your own selfish desires, wants, and needs. Regardless of having a man in your life who will love you and your child, embrace your child, and desire to be with you and love your child equally, you are running after a man who neglects your child, which ultimately is a rejection of you because she is a part of you. Therefore, I have nothing to tell you, or say to you because a woman who will allow a man to reject her child, a part of her, and will continue to pursue him despite the constant rejection, then, you are not a woman at all. – Terrance Dean Hey Bossip Fam, what do you think? Share your opinions and thoughts below! Also, e-mail all your questions Terrance Dean : loveandrelationships@bossip.com Follow Terrance Dean on Twitter : @terrancedean “LIKE” Terrance Dean on Facebook , click HERE! Make sure to order my books Mogul: A Novel (Atria Books – June 2011; $15); Hiding In Hip Hop (Atria Books – June 2008); and Straight From Your Gay Best Friend – The Straight Up Truth About Relationships, Love, And Having A Fabulous Life (Agate/Bolden Books – November 2010; $15). They are available in bookstores everywhere, and on Amazon, click HERE!
This note written by parents to their kids is pretty much what every parent wishes they could write … but few would likely achieve success if they did. If you’re a parent, you know sleeping in is living the dream. In fact, if you have young kids, you’ve likely forgotten what that concept even feels like. If nothing else, your perspective on what sleeping in means has no doubt changed. But even one day of regular rest can change a lot, if you can finagle it. How can you? Please read Exhibit A above, from start to finish. The way mom outlines what they can and cannot do, and basically tells them how it’s gonna be, all with smiley faces and love? It’s the work of a master. The major caveat is that the author of this persuasive manifesto is mom to two bigger kids (ages 8 and 10), but she tells Reddit that it was a success. As for how you keep toddlers out of the bedroom … good luck. The Note All Parents Want To Write To Their Kids How much sleep do you get on a nightly basis, parents? And what methods have you tried to try to eke out a little bit more from time to time? Share with us! Also, see other classic notes about and by little kids: 10 Hilarious Kid Notes Open Slideshow 1. Elementary School Love Letter This elementary school love letter, and the recipient’s response, tells you all there is to know about love among the single-digit set. View As List 1. Elementary School Love Letter This elementary school love letter, and the recipient’s response, tells you all there is to know about love among the single-digit set. 2. Kid’s Insane Christmas Letter Drew Magary’s daughter wrote an insane Christmas list. He wrote an insanely hilarious response. 3. Dear Santa Amazon Letter A kid wrote the full Amazon URL on his Dear Santa letter. In crayon. He’s dedicated. 4. Stinky Kid Note Check out this note written by a Buffalo, N.Y., teacher with regard to the alleged stinky nature of the kids in her class. 5. Kid Poem About Sister This little kid wants his sister out of the house, as this poetry makes abundantly clear. 6. #1 Dad Note An adorable note written from a 12-year-old to the single man who adopted him. It brings a tear to your eye … 7. Note to Dad An adorable note written from a 12-year-old to the man who adopted him. 8. Kid Writes Get Well Note This kid’s get well note for his teacher is chock full of helpful advice. 9. Cute Kid Note Check out this cute note written by a little kid to his dad. He meant “cook.” 10. Hilarious Apology Note This note was written by an eight-year old. He used to really hate one of his brothers.
