The only thing I really know about Portugual is that I worked for a Portuguese guy once and he was a real fucking loser…who really hated when I’d ask him “Hey, aren’t you supposed to be a fisherman”….I guess I also know about their chicken….because it’s affordable…like their women…something I should appreciate…but don’t really…cuz I prefer to avoid the armpit of any contenient…even if I generally belong there…but that was before today…because today, I realized the over catholic, lame spanish wannabees have celebrities of their own…and those celebrities aren’t as hairy or fat assed as I’d expect….cuz this Diana chick, who is modeling her ass for Maxim…has a crazy fucking ass…that surely will end up looking like you’d expect a Portuguese woman to look…but for now…she’s spectactular and I figure we should celebrate that..this
This week the Miami-based rapper/ Men In Black 3 ditty composer known as Pitbull makes his acting debut in the martial arts/action film Blood Money playing himself, naturally — a rapper who just happens to drop club bangers before giving sage drug game advice like “Go hard or go home!” to stone-faced visitors after the show. WHY THE HELL NOT. And yes, Blood Money is actually about a Shaolin priest who becomes a hitman after his family is killed, and it stars Zheng Liu, billed as “the next Bruce Lee,” not to mention Hong Kong legend Gordon Freaking Liu ( The 36th Chamber of Shaolin , 8 Diagram Pole Fighter , Kill Bill ). My takeaway from that is: At long last, bald twins Pitbull and Gordon Liu are in the same movie! Without further ado, watch Pitbull singing his own “Miami Boyz” and advising a wannabe Scarface in Movieline’s exclusive clip. I’d love to have seen Pitbull rap with dancing ladies, dispense advice to criminals, and then also do somersaults over speeding motorcycles and throw knives and roundhouse kick baddies like Zheng Liu does in the rest of this movie. Alas, the Pitbull of Blood Money is all about the music. Perhaps in his next movie he’ll join the ranks of MCs-turned-action stars and defeat an army of cartel thugs with his sick party beats or something. Meanwhile, Blood Money ‘s “next Bruce Lee” should make this an intriguing view for action fans; with the exception of those clearly CG throwing blades that Liu keeps hurling into his enemies, the action relies on practical stunts rather than digital ones. I’m told Liu actually broke a steel bar on his head and the sound you hear was actually captured on location and not foleyed in afterwards. The elder Liu, a living legend, reportedly suffered a stroke last year and has been relatively absent from the public eye since. He also has a role in RZA’s upcoming The Man With The Iron Fists , and from his few scenes in the trailer it looks like he still had it whenever he filmed this movie. Blood Money is out on DVD/Blu-ray now and is available on VOD. Follow Jen Yamato on Twitter . Follow Movieline on Twitter .
Yeah, you’re gonna want to buy the October issue of British Vogue — if only for Christa D’Souza’s bewildered recollection of the one time Kristen Stewart opened up to her, a month before le scandale , during a Parisian smoke break: “‘My God, I’m so in love with my boyfriend. I wish he was here now. I think I want to have his babies. God, I miss him. I love the way he smells. And him me. Like, he loves to lick under my armpits. I don’t get this obsession with washing the smell off. That smell of someone you love. Don’t you think it’s the whole point?’ Looking back, the exchange still feels surreal. It took place just three weeks before those incriminating pictures were allegedly taken. Was she even talking about Pattinson? Was she having on me? Who knows? ” [ Vogue UK via iSubscribe ]
So I posted last night that Regis died before his retirement in this Vespa Accident on Letterman… It turns out he survived and the fall was hardly as funny as it should have been, so he made it to his last show, cuz he is retiring and that glorious, historic event brought out his past host, busty Kathie Lee Gifford, who anyone who stayed home sick in the early 90s jerked off to….and who based on POSTS ABOUT HER TITS still jerk off to her… She came out all sweaty armpits for the armpit fetishists….all red headed for the red head fetishists…..all big breasted for the busty festishists…..all big assed for the menopausal women fetishists….she exudes sex, makes me wonder why Frank cheated on her…oh right…cuz she’s annoying as fuck…
I can’t believe I’m actually doing this, but yes I’m writing a post about Kathie Lee Gifford’s big fat breasts. What? She didn’t really leave me much choice going on The Today Show wearing a swimsuit. Boobs are boobs, I don’t discriminate. So what if they’ve got a few age spots and some weird extra skin spilling out from her armpit, they’ve been through a lot. Anyhow, it’s not the worst way to start your day. Enjoy.
I have a friend who used to fuck armpits, he was obsessed with pit fucking, it was more than just his fetish, the motherfucker just would never shut up about the shit, it would get really annoying, it’s like he loved the smell of the armpit, the stubble, and if he found a girl built like this, with a pussy in her armpit, we probably wouldn’t have made fun of him and call him weird as much as we did, in fact he probably would still be alive today, cuz he would have never killed himself for thinking he was so weird for only being able to get off to armpit.
