Tag Archives: attention

Bossip staff I have a problem I’d like to vent and hopefully get some solid advice. I’ve been with my lady for about 3 years and in the beginning she the one I thought I’d marry. She cooked, she cleaned, she did my laundry and was very attentive to my needs. Before I go any further this was not a one way street, I did all the things she asked of me as well. Not to mention when she decided to go back to school to finish her degree I supported her. She didn’t need or want anything and didn’t pressure her to work because I wanted her to finish and it seems like that’s the only reason she did those things because she was solely dependent on me. Now that she’s working she doesn’t cook or clean or care about me. I’m not trying to sound sensitive because I know that working and juggling household duties is hard. I help when I can by cooking occasionally ordering takeout and have cleaning people come in once a month to do deep cleaning. I do this because I want spend time with her make time to be with her but she doesn’t want to be bothered. I come home as ask for what’s for dinner and she says she already ate. She’ll do her laundry only and let mine pile up. I don’t know what Iv’e done to her to make her lose interest so dramatically but I honestly don’t know what else to do. She’s not doing what she did to catch my attention and shows little interest in continuing. I think it’s mean and misleading and I feel like I should cut my losses now. What do you think I should do? Dear sir, thank you for writing in and sharing your story! So you supported your woman as a good man should and she’s now decided to abandon the qualities that you once admired about her? That’s, surely, a hard pill to swallow. At this point, however, it seems like the best thing to do would be to really explore how committed the both of you are to making you relationship work if it’s salvageable. Three years is lot of time to invest so this is why you need to know if you should move on or make strides to make it work. It make or break time but ti does take two and no one has time to waste! While you may not understand why she no longer cooks, cleans and the like, you should retrace your steps and see if you can pinpoint at what point in the relationship she stopped doing these things and what may have triggered the change. What you may come to find is that her changes may not have anything do with you. She may just be at a point in her life where she doesn’t know what she wants in a relationship, in her career or otherwise. She may not want the responsibility of making sure your fed and your clothes and house are clean, you know? So if you want to communicate with her on this matter, start by not taking it personal and find out where her head is in general, then you can get to the crust of the issues and how they directly affect yours and her togetherness. So, sir, here’s the deal. You can never gauge if you and your partner are going to grow together or just never know the outcome. While it was very noble of you to support her while she was in school, pursuing her degree and career, she may be overwhelmed with juggling the home and career. She may be feeling like she’s under pressure to perform both at the job and at the house despite all your overtures to relieve her from time to time. So, don’t take it personal sit and have a talk with her about where she is in her thought process before you even talk about the relationship because, again, it may not have anything to do with you. Hope this helps! Good luck to you sir … good luck! What are you thoughs, Bossip Fam? Pleas share them below! Remember to e-mail all topic suggestions, feedback and questions to loveandrelationships@bossip.com !

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Dear Bossip: She Won’t Do What She Did to Get Me