Cara Delevingne puts on her American accent because she’s a Brit…for some new movie that I didn’t bother paying attention the the name of, because I don’t actually care, I just like being reminded that acting requires zero to no skill, despite what actors tell you, because if the world knew that playing make-belief was a fucking scam that pays really well, then it would lower their value, and thus lower their pay, so keeping it a closed circuit rather than an open market is the strategy from everyone involved.. The good news is that thanks to the internet, you don’t need the studios anymore, fuck em, go make your own movie and become the next Cameron Diaz, you don’t need to be Cara Delevinge, or to be an it girl…because anyone can do this bullshit…you just have to be a big enough asshole to do it…. The post Cara Delevingne Proves that Acting Requires No Talent of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .
Her name is CLARA SETTJE , she’s a model out of New York…part of Trump Agency, which I guess is Donald Trump’s strategy to recruit new wives….and she’s naked for some photographer named Matteo Montaro and as someone who loves models who get naked for the sake of getting naked and building her portfolio so that she can become the next big thing…so I guess that means that me Clara is my girlfriend…
Toni Gaarn is rumored to have had her asshole filled with Leonardo DiCaprio – but I am going to assume, based on her German roots, that the asshole that was filled was Leonardo DiCaprio, as she expelled everything in her asshole on his face, because when you get to his level of rich and famous, with girls throwing themselves at you from every angle, you need to experiment with things to get off…you are no longer normal and satisfied with hot pussy because all pussy you get is hot…so you need to dig deeper…it is kind of like what you have to do with masturbation… That said, here she is in Aqua du Coco or some other nonsense brand that is supposed to be swimwear, but that is more like some shit old rich women would wear to cover their plastic surgery scars and baby making scars that were all part of the struggle in gold digging. But Toni’s still alright.
Her name is Alyssa Barbara , she’s a bit of a newcomer to the internet game, at least to me, because I’ve only just heard of her this week, but I am pretty hopeful that she is going to be sticking around for a while, because these pictures of her by photographer MVISION_LA …are pretty fucking noticeable, as are her nipples…something that I am sure you would all want to suck on, probably because your mom was too disgusted by you to let you near her tits when you were a baby, or because you’ve never actually seen tits before, and the whole idea of them is like this scientific mystery that your inquisitive eager mind just can’t get enough of… I FOLLOW HER NOW and will be sure to keep you updated on all she does…because that’s what love and romance that may be confused as stalking…is all about…
Rita Ora is so classy, all ready for the tennis match like she was a socialite white girl, when really she is of unknown race and probably not classy at all, because she seems like she’s straight gully from the UK who smashed her way to the top – in the even you don’t know what that means…let me translate it for you – she seems like she’s UK trash who fucked the right people and got an opportunity to come to North America where she worked her connections in efforts to become the next Rihanna and it is starting to work – even if it took a solid 3 years…her ass and tits remained big enough to guide her to where she needs to go…but then again, pretending to be hip hop, like Drake has proved, means you don’t have to be gutter at all, you can be white and Jewish and just pretend and the people will listen… Whether she actually plays tennis, or goes to country clubs is irrelevant, because I think this post is more about her walking around hard nippled…and I don’t think making it sport related, even if it is a sport I have a fetish for, is really relevant, but then again, I dress up my wife as a tennis ball sometimes and go down on her, so maybe a costume is key to a solid role play – what the fuck do I know…nothing…that is the fuck do I know.. TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE
OK, so it may not be quite as hot as those ramen pictures , but Sara Malakul Lane continues to make a pretty strong case to become the next future ex-Mrs. Tuna with photoshoots like this. According to my sources, apparently Sara’s already a huge star in Thailand and obviously she should be in the USA too. Which I’m pretty sure is where I come in. I can’t guarantee marrying and divorcing a pasty blogger will make a super-hot model like Sara a household name, but that’s only because nobody’s agreed to try it yet.
NeNe Leakes is coming to the defense of her Real Housewives of Atlanta co-star Porsha Williams in the aftermath of Sunday’s melee and Williams’ arrest. “I’ve sat through many reunion shows, but this one takes the cake for me!” NeNe wrote on her official site in the unofficial understatement of the year. NeNe Leakes: 12 Wacky Faces We Love Open Slideshow 1. NeNe: Who, Me? We just can’t get enough of NeNe’s wonderful wacky faces. View As List 1. NeNe: Who, Me? We just can’t get enough of NeNe’s wonderful wacky faces. 2. NeNe: Happy NeNe looks pleased as she flashes those pearly whites. 3. NeNe: The Wink NeNe Leakes is quite expressive, huh? Just check out this one-eyed move. 4. NeNe: Asking Questions NeNe asks the important questions. And she wears her heart on her face. 5. NeNe: The Snap You better listen up when NeNe Leakes is snapping her fingers. 6. NeNe: Funny Face NeNe’s silly faces are priceless. We just love this expression. 7. NeNe: She Knows Best NeNe knows best. Just watch her finger and learn. 8. NeNe: Let’s Get Physical NeNe puts her best work out game face on. Grrrrr. Work it out! 9. NeNe: She’s Got Needs NeNe knows what she wants. And this face proves it. 10. NeNe: Angry Don’t get on NeNe’s bad side. Or she might look at you like this. 11. NeNe: The Side Eye What’s happening here? Is that a wink? Or is she giving someone the side eye? 12. NeNe: Shocked! NeNe, glass of wine in hand, looks shocked and appalled. While Kenya Moore might play the victim and chastise Porsha for using violence, Phaedra Parks says she’s a bully , and NeNe is inclined to agree. She had nothing to lose at The Real Housewives of Atlanta reunion , NeNe said, and provoked Williams the same way she’s tried to provoke others before. “When is it ‘okay’ to BULLY someone, then question retaliation?” NeNe asked, claiming the former Miss USA “taunted, pushed, provoked and lied” all season. Leakes also RAILED against Moore on Twitter, writing: “NOT @Porsha4real fault! She was provoked the same way she tried provoking me by pulling my ear n episode 1. Maybe I should press charges.” As you know all too well if you watch The Real Housewives of Atlanta (or even if you don’t), Porsha threw down against Kenya on Sunday night … The Real Housewives of Atlanta Reunion Fight … after Moore accused her of cheating on ex-husband Kordell Stewart, called her his “beard” and mocked her intelligence with the use of props. The attack resulted in police charging Porsha Williams with battery and a subsequent arrest warrant being issued. She turned herself in for the misdemeanor. Since then, Kenya has slammed her co-star and acted as if she was attacked out of nowhere, for no reason at all, and did nothing wrong whatsoever. We’re not saying anyone should be thrown to the ground by their hair and be stomped on, but Phaedra and NeNe’s point might have some merit, no? Not as the scepter and megaphone-waving Moore sees it. “I was violently attacked by Porsha Williams … If someone puts their hands on me, I will not just let it go,” Moore said in a statement on Monday. “The authorities will decide her fate, not me,” she added. The court of public opinion, meanwhile, will decide … Team Porsha Team Kenya Team Drama! View Poll » 23 Craziest Celebrity Fights Open Slideshow 1. Real Housewives of Atlanta FIGHT The Real Housewives of Atlanta aired an insane fight in January 2014. Watch the buildup and then the flying fists here. View As List 1. Real Housewives of Atlanta FIGHT The Real Housewives of Atlanta aired an insane fight in January 2014. Watch the buildup and then the flying fists here. 2. The Real Housewives of Atlanta Reunion Fight The Real Housewives of Atlanta fight during their reunion special. Porsha makes Kenya wish she’d never brought that megaphone. 3. Dance Moms: Abby Lee Miller-Kelly Hyland Fight! Abby Lee Miller of Dance Moms goes at it with Kelly Hyland in this clip from Season 4 Episode 7. 4. Vanderpump Rules Fight: Tom Punches Jax Tom punches Jax on Vanderpump Rules. Just another insane fight on the reality show. 5. Vanderpump Rules FIGHT Stassi Schroeder accuses Kristen Doute of sleeping with her ex-boyfriend on Vanderpump Rules … and all hell breaks loose. 6. Real Housewives of New Jersey Fight: Prostitution Whore! Teresa Giudice unloads on Danielle Staub and calls her a prostitution whore on the Real Housewives of New Jersey. 7. Jenelle Evans Girl Fight Jenelle Evans absolutely pummels a girl named Brittany Truett back in her wilder days. At least Jenelle didn’t sucker punch her like Sharkeisha. 8. Sharkeisha Video This video of Sharkeisha getting into a fight has gone viral. It spread so quickly and caused so much controversy that Instagram yanked it. 9. Perez Hilton and Will.i.am: The Fight This video was shot of the fight between Perez Hilton and will.i.am. It was a complete $h!tshow from the looks of it. 10. Cat Attacks Woman in Snow You gotta see what happens when this woman kicks snow in a cat’s face. It doesn’t end well for her. 11. Snooki Getting Punched on Jersey Shore A classic scene from the first season of Jersey Shore. Snooki gets her clock cleaned in the bar by Brad Ferro. 12. Rick Ross vs. Young Jeezy It’s Rick Ross vs. Young Jeezy! These two went at it at a taping for a BET awards show. 13. Shia LaBeouf Fights in London Shia LaBeouf gets into a fight in London in this video. He even head butts a dude. 14. Kanye West Attacks Photographer Kanye West attacks a photographer, again, as seen in this amazing TMZ video from July 2013. 15. Gypsy Sisters Fight A couple of cast members from Gypsy Sisters on TLC go at it in an epic girl fight. Lovely. 16. My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding Fight This fight on My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding is an all-timer. Seriously, even by inane reality show standards. 17. 50 Cent-Gunplay Fight 50 Cent and Gunplay get into it outside the 2012 BET Awards. 18. Amber Portwood-Gary Shirley Fight Amber Portwood and Gary Shirley FIGHT on MTV’s Teen Mom. It’s one for the ages right here. 19. Kailyn Lowry Fight Kailyn Lowry fights Javi Marroquin in a very controversial moment from Teen Mom 2. 20. Jenelle Evans Fights Roommate on Teen Mom 2 Jenelle Evans throws down with her roommate and her boyfriend on the January 24, 2012 episode of Teen Mom 2. 21. Jersey Shore Fight in Slow Motion Sammi and JWoww from Jersey Shore throw down in slow motion. This video is amazing. 22. Jersey Shore – One Shot Fight Ronnie Magro knocks some guy out cold on Jersey Shore. What a douche. 23. Basketball Wives FIGHT: Jennifer Williams Slapped! Check out this epic fight on Basketball Wives. There is a slap involved and a lot of cursing. It first aired in April 2012.
At this point, talk of Goonies 2 and of a Mrs. Doubtfire sequel is just that: talk. But there’s one follow-up film about which fans can truly get excited. Pitch Perfect 2 really is happening, folks. Rebel Wilson Tweeted an adorable photo from the first day of rehearsals this week, giving fans a look at herself alongside Elizabeth Banks, Brittany Snow, Ester Dean, Kelley Jakle, Alexis Knapp and Hanna Mae Lee. All will return for the sequel to the beloved 2012 musical comedy. “1st day of PP2 rehearsals!” the Australian actress behind Fat Amy wrote as a caption. Anna Kendrick, Anna Camp and Skylar Astin are missing, but don’t worry: they are on board as well. Pitch Perfect 2 comes out on May 15, 2015 and you can go watch Pitch Perfect online via Movie Fanatic if you have somehow never seen this awesome flick.
Matty B is a young “rapper” who’s been trying for years to become the next Justin Bieber by uploading his terrible music videos to YouTube. Matty B’s Taylor Swift covers have received tens of millions of views but most of those come from folks curious to see if an 11-year-old rapping to a Taylor Swift song is actually the whitest thing that ever took place. (We’ll save you some time: it is.) Matty B: Juicy They said it couldn’t be done, but it looks like Matty may have out-WTFed himself with his latest video in which he raps over the beat of the 1994 Notorious B.IG. classic “Juicy.” Yes, a middle school kid dancing around the suburbs and spittin’ rhymes in the style of one of the hardest rappers that ever lived. This is the kind of thing YouTube was made for. Matty doesn’t let the fact that he appears to be on some sort of camping trip stop him from mimcking Biggie’s tone and mannerisms and sadly, the little fella isn’t trying to be funny when he looks into the camera and says, “It’s all good baby, bay-baaaay.” in his best Christopher Wallace voice. Nor is he letting the fact that he clearly lives in a quiet rural community stop him from rockin’ his dopest Brooklyn Nets gear and changing Big’s lyrics just enough that they’re not completely inappropriate coming from a pre-pubescent white kid. We’re not trying to discourage Matty from going after his dream. W e’d just like to point out to him that copying other rapper’s rhymes is considered a major faux pas in the hip-hop community and remind him that if he’s serious about making a career of this, he might want to put pen to paper and pay someone to make him some original beats.
So apparently Sara Jean Underwood ‘s aerial yoga routine is working, at least judging from this bikini picture she posted on Instagram. But obviously my Twitter campaign to get Sara to become the next ex-Mrs. Tuna isn’t going quite as well, since that dude in the picture with her isn’t me. I know, try to contain your surprise. Anyway, if any of my readers are good with Photoshop, send me an email. I’ve got two requests: swap this lucky bastard out for me, and then put another hot blonde model on my other arm. My mom is gonna be so proud.
