Despite the theories spun by Teen Mom fans, Tyler Batlierra is not leaving Catelynn Lowell . They have another baby on the way! They gave up their first child for adoption. In this new Teen Mom OG sneak peek, Tyler and Catelynn grapple with the bittersweet occassion that is their firstborn's birthday. “It's been almost a year since we've seen our daughter, Carly,” Catelynn says in a voiceover. “But today is her birthday,” Catelynn narrates. “It's usually a hard day for us, so we always try to celebrate it in a positive way.” There are a couple of awkward moments as they eat their salads before they speak on the phone to Dawn, their adoption counselor. They talk about Nova and her ability to understand that it's Carly's birthday. Nova, of course, is only three years old, so immediately asked when the party would be, and if they would have cake and ice cream. Dawn suggests that they send a Nova video to Carly, and Tyler says that it's already in the works. The conversation, which had so far been lighthearted, turns more serious. Dawn praises Catelynn and Tyler, telling them how proud she is of how they're taking this milestone in stride. Adoption can be a difficult process for everyone involved, even though no one questions that they made the right decision. And the two of them have really made great progress in handling the situation with a healthy perspective. As Tyler admits when Dawn comes over to speak to them in person, he and Catelynn weren't always so chill about it. “I think some of our old expectations were unrealistic,” Tyler admits. “Like, [we] signed our rights off,” he says, referring to signing away their parental rights nine years ago. “A couple of years ago,” Tyler confesses. “I was on the other side.” By which he means that he felt entitled to parental rights that he does not possess. Tyler gives an example: “I was like, ‘You wouldn’t be parents if it weren’t for me.’” “It’s acceptance of what role I really play in this child’s life and this family’s life,” Tyler says of his current perspective. Dawn, their adoption counselor, knows that Carly's birthday is a big deal. She walks them through how they might speak to Carly's parents. “If I can advise you in any way,” Dawn says. “I would say a soft landing would be a good thing.” Dawn suggests: “Maybe starting a conversation with, ‘What’s Carly doing today? How are things going with her at school?’” “You love to brag about Nova,” Dawn notes. “She’s gonna love to brag about Carly.” Dawn concludes: “I think that’s gonna be an easier entry into a conversation.” Tyler and Catelynn then speak about the various traumas that they have experienced. While most of Catelynn's PTSD arises from her childhood, as is most often the case, it's not the only source. The adoption that she and Tyler went through as teens was another trauma in her life. That is very understandable. Being conscious of that can be tremendously helpful. Catelynn's miscarriage, she says, was a trigger for a lot of that trauma to resurface in her mind. Catelynn and Tyler have demonstrated more personal and emotional growth than a lot of their co-stars. We're not going to pretend that either of them are perfect. If they didn't have flaws, they wouldn't work as reality stars. But they've really worked hard on themselves and on their relationship. That deserves some recognition.
Link:
Catelynn Lowell and Tyler Baltierra Reflect on Adoption Nine Years Later
