With the departure of Nicolette Sheridan, “Desperate Housewives” has a spot open for a gal with some serious attitude.
Celebrated archivists EverythingIsTerrible unearthed this video of Ted Danson running game. Special correspondent Eliot Glazer informs me that this comes from an 1986 PSA entitled How Can I Tell If I'm Really In Love?
Originally posted here:
Ted Danson’s Pick-Up Lines
I don’t know what the fuck is up with Louisianna, I do know that I’ve been there before and never wanted to fuckin’ leave, and the case in fuckin’ point is that some dude named Hurricane Chris was asked to come sing his song “Halle Berry ” in the House of Representatives during some Louisianna State Legislature session, whatever the fuck that means, I just know I wish that bitch on the right was doin a little less head bobbin and a little more booty talking. This is massively weird and out of fuckin’ context and that’s what makes me believe that anything is fuckin’ possible… Here’s the lyrics in case you weren’t sure what they were talking about at this very important political gathering… Lyrics to She’s Fine : Bow bow bow Bow bow Bow bow bow Bow bow Bow bow bow Hurricane Bow bow Bow bow bow Bow bow Bow bow bow Bum bum bum Bum bum bum Bum bum bum Bum bum bum She fine den a bitch, ass and her tits Thick in tha hips every nig want her Call her Halle Berry, Halle berry Halle Berry, Halle berry She walkin like a model Hands on your knees Scrub the ground She ain’t nothing but a tease Halle Berry, Halle berry Halle Berry, Halle berry Well let’s get ratchet Let’s get ratchet Look at her prettier then Halle and thicker than Janet She say she like all of my club bangers I be jamming Told her to bust it open let me see what’s really happnin She the ship and I’m the captain I’m tha captain Booty bigger than the pus And I’m all the way in your city I’m from louisianna so you gotta show me how your City do it for that camera Make it drop and bring it back to the top You no amateur Girl you can give it to me it ain’t nothing I can’t handle She just got out of the shower smellin like a scented candle And I’m finna finna? Sliding off tha mattress No moving no acting baby this is real action Beat it up so bad You be scared to walk past me I know your halle berry Baby there’s no acting I beat it up so bad You be scared to walk past me for real She fine den a bitch ass and her tits Thick in tha hips every nig want her Call her Halle Berry, Halle berry Halle Berry, Halle berry She walkin like a model Hands on your knees Scrub the ground She ain’t nothing but a tease Halle Berry, Halle berry, Halle berry Halle Berry, Halle berry Halle berry you jazze That’s way past fine Girl you look like something that should be on tha dance line Increadable by tha waist Pluss she got a pretty face Even tho she got class she listen to UGK I’m finna flip her through traffic With tha top back of tha donk Girl I gaurntee I can make you go numb numb numb numb I got enough bread to take me and you to London And back to America and all over the country She make me want to keep her close by Like a side kick She tha type of chick that ain’t gone never look sloppy I’m a beat it out the frame Hurricane that’s who I be You must be Halle berry I don’t need to see your Id She fine den a bitch ass and her tits Thick in tha hips every nig want her Call her Halle Berry, Halle berry Halle Berry, Halle berry She walkin like a model Hands on your knees Scrub the ground She ain’t nothing but a tease Halle Berry, Halle berry Halle Berry, Halle berry Gone bob your head Gone work your shoulder Now what I just said girl do it on tha dick Age ain’t shit I done got a lil older Me or you man baby girl take a pic Whitch one She so classy, Shes so jazzy Lil momma blow like a Do it on tha dick She don’t need no help She say she got it She do it all by her self Get so fine Like a god damn ticket Gave her a hickey In order for a nig like me to spend cash You gotta bounce like shocks in your ass You, bed, ass, work Start slow faster Mr
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Hurricane Chris Performs for the Government of the Day
I don’t know what I am doing today because of this hangover, but I do know that everyone is still talking about Michael Jackson, at least everyone in the bar last night was, like it was some kind of huge shocker, considering dude hasn’t looked like a corpse the last decade, you know cuz his African American skin color didn’t die a long time ago, and that series of skin bleaching insanity he went through in the 80s, probably had nothing to do with the painfulskin cancer he was dealing with, so in celebration of his black skin, here’s a couple black people on the beach in Barbados, and I’m lovin’ the girl this footballer is with, because I pretty much love all black girls, they just don’t love me.
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Some Footballer Daniel Sturridge on a Beach with Some Booty of the Day
I don’t like talking about other people, i like talking about myself, and that’s only because it reminds me how useless I am. but my phone and emails been going off like mad, and I ignored them because I was trying to get this girl who works at my local store to let me play with her DDs, which I thought was far more important than answering, but when I looked and say MJ was dead, I was actually surprised, even though he’s looked like a corpse for years. Here is a man who was a star his entire fucking life, who has had a song that has had hit songs every fuckin’ decade that we can all identify with and remember learning the dance move along to in hopes of getting the part on the High School cheerleading team despite being a Mexican who just moved there and couldn’t speak english and who everyone laughed at, or if you were that weird french kid who only dressed like Jackson during the “Bad” era.
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RIP Motherfucker the Michael Jackson Edition of the Day
Dead Snow Movie Trailer One of the biggest hits at Sundance is making its way to American theatres with Tommy Wirkola’s Dead Snow.
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Dead Snow Movie Trailer
Poker Face Lady Gaga Wale Chillin New SUPERCLEAR Diamond Quality Makes you wanna Just Dance! Much Music Video Awards -FAIR USE- “Copyright Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for “fair use” for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing
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LADY GAGA "Poker Face" NEW IMAX DIAMOND QUALITY Much Music Just Dance! Love Game Hit
***THIS IS A FAN MADE TRAILER*** This is my vision for a Green Lantern movie with Nathan Fillion as Hal Jordan. He won’t be Hal for real, but all the more reason for a fan trailer! For the record, I did this purely for fun, with NO intention of “fooling” anyone or covering the fact that I used clips from other movies
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Green Lantern Trailer
Christopher Meloni Harold as “Hal” Jordan / Green Lantern, Victor Garber as Sinestro, Tricia Helfer as Boodikka, Michael Madsen as Kilowog, relase date July 28 2009
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Green Lantern First Look
www.maximotv.com Exclusive interviews with Gary Busey, Iliza Schlesinger, Maureen McCormick, Kyle Cease, NIck DiPaolo, India De Beaufort, Marques Ray, Jeffrey Ross, Larry The Cable Guy, Rebecca Corry, Gary Valentine, Nick D’Agosto and Vicki Roberts at Comedy Central Presents ‘Roast of Larry The Cable Guy’ at Warner Brothers Studio Lot in Burbank, California March 1, 2009 Red Carpet Interviews By Dana Ward Maximo TV ¬© Ricomix Productions Maximo TV Networks
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Comedy Central ‘Roast of Larry The Cable Guy’ March 1, 2009
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