We told you about the people that suck on Facebook and Twitter and you responded with horror tales about the people you know. Here are some of the best, and we’d love to hear more! Commenter Cyr3n got rid of a family member for being a proselytizer. “I’m interested to know how many ppl were unfriended this wk in the wake of the healthcare law passing. I’ve been seeing a lot of crossfire on my RSS feeds lately! And yes, I’ve unfriended my own sister for posting hate-rant on my wall.” The Dewd has a friend who is so messy with internet schemes, he just can’t defriend him . “I have a guy with on Facebook that is in a league of his own. He’s a former high school teacher who got into Internet Marketing, and now all his updates are about webinars, or making things “go viral”, or about how social networking is not just “some fad.” This is peppered with occasional quotes from John C. Maxwell, and he talks a lot about “adding value.” He seems to have about 6 different schemes going at once…all misguided ventures that serve vague, ill-defined purposes. Needless to say, it’s a train wreck but I can’t bring myself to defriend him because it’s so entertaining.” BadLuckGirl hates fake account makers . “You should add Fake Account Makers to the list. Anyone who makes an account for their dog or their baby needs help. Sure, its cute to post pictures of the new baby or puppy or car there – that’s fine. But when the baby or the dog is writing on people’s walls, it’s crossed a line. One of my dad’s friends made an account for his new puppy. I accepted the friend request because the dog was soooo cute. But now, the dog is posting on his wall, calling him “Papa”. Even worse, now the dog is my ZooMate in Zoo World. I just sent a Collectible Pear Tree to a dog. She also plays CafeWorld and FarmVille, like her daddy! Attention: YOUR DOG DOES NOT PLAY FARMVILLE. I’m sure if she could talk, she’d call you Papa, but she would not ask you to fertilize her crops. The dog dude is ultra annoying because he’s a replyer. I can’t unfriend him because he’s practically my uncle. His responses to my statuses are always inane attempts to be funny or obvious questions with yes or no answers. I don’t like to reply because it just encourages him. Once, I posted the chorus to “Bad Romance” (when it was stuck in my head) and he tried to correct me – “Gaga Ooh La La? Don’t you mean “Lady Gaga” ?” or something stupid. Please, know what you’re talking about before trying to correct someone, especially when it comes to Lady Gaga.” Tart of Darkness wants some sympathy for being a “Replyer” but has plenty of hatred for a “Fisher.” “I’m a replyer, but I didn’t realize until now that’s a bad thing. I honestly thought people would appreciate having someone acknowledge their post instead of having it just hanging out there in cyberspace. This truly explains to me why I was defriended a long time ago by this woman on myspace. I could never understand it. Now I do. My pet peeve. Someone who refers cryptically to a private communication between you on their open status. As in “Dinner with Sandy = happy. Email from friend = sad.” Yeah. The email was from me and I emailed you because I thought the situation I wanted to describe to you was personal and private and I wanted to keep it out of the realm of gossip. So now you’ve publicized it without publicizing it. You bitch. And the point of my email was that I don’t actually consider you a friend, but more like a friendly acquaintance.” Many people complained about the recently married and new parents clogging up Facebook, but Juuuuules had a great defriending tale . “I had to de-friend a girl who I’ve know since high school. She counted down the days to her wedding…strating from day 365. EVERY. FUCKING. DAY. ‘182 days until I marry my best friiiiend!…181 days until I marry my best friend!…’ and so on… Now she is pregnant and has already started with the ‘Week 5- my little peanut is the size of a pencil eraser tee hee…'” What else you got, commenterati? What horrible things have happened now that you followed our advice and culled your list of friends? And tell us more about the horrible behavior that lead you to defriend them. All the bragging, self-promotion, horrible overshares, fishing comments, and flagarant abuse of Mafia Wars or Farmville updates. Feel free to leave screengrabs in the comments, just make sure to black out the names to protect the guilty. This is your forum, people. Scare us with your originality and blind us with the crushing horribleness of the rest of humanity. We’re asking for it, and we know you can deliver. [ Image via UltraHi’s Flickr ]
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