Tag Archives: face

Breast Milk is Funny Weapon of Assault of the Day

This is a funny story of a drunk hag getting arrested and when being made to change into her prison outfit, she turned around and squirted the cop in the face with her breast milk, or what I like to call, natures most amazing weapon. Sure, bitch could have thrown shit, or pissed on the cop, but that shit is played out and doesn’t get you on the fucking news, so she got creative, and really the cop shouldn’t have pressed charges, she should have taken in every second of amazing stranger tits milk, hot and dripping off her face…. See, I have never tasted breast milk but I have always wanted to. All the women I’ve ended up with have been dried up hags who can’t get pregnant, or young girls who never wanted to pregnant, but if they did get pregnant, they’d abort, so I have always wanted to get the shit sprayed down my throat and all over my face and on more than on occassion, I have tried paying new mother prostitutes or strippers to do it, but they all refused, like I was trying to make the one wholesome thing about them dirty, when everything about them was dirty, especially their drunken, expired cum scent, they just didn’t like to admit it, cuz I guess new mothers are hormonal and shit…..

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Breast Milk is Funny Weapon of Assault of the Day

LOL. Limewire.

Link: http://www.cristgaming.com/pirate.swf A little ditty you won't be able to get out of your head for the rest of the day. You're welcome. Read

Sandra Lee’s Nasty Cocktail

Lemonade, heavy cream, and vodka is not a delicious, sweet treat, Sandra Lee! Even your face doesn't believe you. Watch

Jessica Simpson Gets a Facial of the Day

Well this picture is a huge fucking disappointment….not that I thought Jessica Simpson would actually post pictures of her getting cumshots to her face, but you never fucking know with these crazy bitches who crave male attention cuz they can’t keep a man and their baby sister has already started a family, while they are stuck nurturing a fear of dying along..

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Jessica Simpson Gets a Facial of the Day

Kylie Minogue Comes Prepared of the Day

I guess since the cancer scare, Kyle Minogue is ready for anything, and based on how she’s dressed it is safe to say that she knows life is a funny thing that throws all kinds of situations in your face and that there is just no way of predicting the next event or situation, at least that’s what I like to think, because with padding like that, it looks like she’s in military army, ready to drop to her knees and disarm any erection that throws itself in her face and down her throat, because these are some serious dicksucking pants, but maybe dressing for sucking dick is just a fantasy of mine and really she’s just like the crazy cancer survivor who used to hang out in the park wearing tin foil asking radom people if they had lead sheets to fight off the cancer rays in some kind of serious insanity….either way, we should all appreciate fashionable yet functional whore gear and here’s some Kylie Minogue modeling it…. Here she is in a See Through skirt at the Brit Awards, cuz I guess not having your own tits or nipples makes a bitch try harder….that’s not mean to be a joke cuz Breast Cancer is a serious issue…It’s just simple psychology…. Pics via Bauer

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Kylie Minogue Comes Prepared of the Day

Lindsay Lohan’s Weird Fuckin Face of the Day

Lohan is a fucking wreck. I don’t where she is or what she is doing, but I do know that her hot tits are being suffocated in this dress and would like to come out for air to distract us from her big swollen stupid lookin’ lips that make her face look it was either in a serious accident or some kind of burn victim. Part of me will always like this bitch, but unfortunately that part of me is not my dick, as all we have is just memories of the night we had together and the pair of panties I stole from her and wore for a month….wait that wasn’t Lohan, that was some redheaded tranny in designer clothes….which I guess is pretty much the same fuckin’ thing…except at least a tranny fucks you…while Lohan’s all “lesbian”. Here are some scars from cutting like she was an awkward lonely confused teenager on her arms… And some Bruises like she was a hooker who got thrown the fuck around on her legs…. Pics via Bauer

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Lindsay Lohan’s Weird Fuckin Face of the Day

Oprah Tries To Wipe Off Drew Brees’ Birthmark

Oprah might not be as big a Brees fan as she appears to be, though, because she's apparently never seen his face before. [ Jack's Note : Let's pray she never has Mikhail Gorbachev on the show. Also, is that an absurdly outdated joke at this point? I'm so fucking old.] The Best Links: Who’s Been Kissing You? Oprah Shares A Super-Awkward Moment With Drew Brees Video: Oprah Tries To Clean Birthmark Off Drew Brees Watch

Fun With Faces

Filed under: Photo Galleries Sometimes celebs drop the glam and go with goofy — check out which stars went a little wacky! More Face Photos Stars With Pull Drag Face Rockin’ Faces … Permalink

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Fun With Faces

Julianne Hough Has Pink Eye of the Day

Dancing with the Stars bitch who turned into a country singer – at least that’s what I’ve gathered about her from some bad skin infomercial she is endorsed – showed up to an event with pink eye and it left at least one person wondering whether she got it from letting her record exec jerk off on her face and getting some in her eye, or if he is one of those weird rich people with weird control issues who is into weird fetishes like shitting on the face of a Dancing with the Stars dancer turned country singer he just signed and the whole thing is pretty fucking disgusting but at least her nipple was hard – sometimes the little things make up for the disgusting things….like whether a bitch’s heart is still beating when lying comatose in the hospital you work at versus hittin’ up the morgue, cuz both corpses have pussies, just one is less creepy that the other, if you know what I mean….which I hope you do…because I have no fucking idea how the two are related.

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Julianne Hough Has Pink Eye of the Day

Kanye’s Paparazzi-Popping Case Dismissed

It’s looking pretty unlikely that Kanye West is going to show his face at the Grammys this weekend. But that doesn’t mean he won’t have reason to celebrate (or, like he did after the..

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Kanye’s Paparazzi-Popping Case Dismissed