I may have THE BEST FUCKING CHRISTMAS GIFT GUIDE IN THE FUCKING GAME …but LOVE magazine comes in a close second with their half naked hot model video advent calendar featuring babes like IRINA SHAYK, PIXIE GELDOF, DAISY LOWE, ANNE V, JESSICA STAM, ELIZA CUMMINGS, KELLY BROOK, Alessandra Ambrosio, LILY DONALDSON fuck does this list ever end…..SUKI WATERHOUSE……DREE HEMINGWAY…Abigail Clancy….shit just go to LOVE MAGAZINE to see the entire calendar… But this wouldn’t be a stepfather post without posting some of my favorties….but for the record all of them are amazing… IRINA SHAYK: ALESSANDRA AMBROSIO: PIXIE GELDOF: DAISY LOWE: DREE HEMINGWAY: CARA DELEVINGNE: ABBEY CLANCY: ANNE V: FRIDA GUSTAVSSON: JESSICA STAM: ELIZA CUMMINGS: KELLY BROOK: SUKI WATERHOUSE: LILY DONALDSON: Tis the season..for the Very Merry Stepfather Holiday GIFT GUIDE .
Game developer Crytek has hired director Albert Hughes to bring its Crysis gaming franchise to the big screen. Half of the Hughes brothers team behind Menace II Society and T he Book of Eli , Albert is directing The 7 Wonders Of Crysis 3 , an online series set in a reforested future New York 2047. Behold the teaser: Production companies often have trouble converting video game properties to film, which is why Crytek isn’t bothering — with the production companies. Using no actors or movie cameras, Hughes is directing the game engine itself, rendering his cinematic vision with the same software players will use to shoot each other in the face. And here are four reasons to look forward to it. 1. The Greatest Graphics The Crysis series has always been famous for its stunning visuals. While other games worry about the mass-market, Crytek’s approach is “Bring us your most powerful and expensive computers and we will make them cry gorgeously detailed tears with realistic fluid dynamics.” Its CryEngine is the heart of the entire company, rendering massive, fantastically detailed worlds. In fact, Crytek’s first game, Far Cry, began as a technology demo which impressed people so hard it was developed into a full game. The engine has been constantly updated every since. The latest iteration, CryEngine 3, eats supercomputers and spits out state-of-the-art graphics cards. 2. A True Video-Game Movie It was only a matter of time until someone saw video games and asked “Wait a minute, why do we even still need people?” The answer is lots of reasons. But when most of the people in your film are extras designed to catch the heroes’ bullets, those reasons become less important. The technology for vactors — “virtual actors” — simply isn’t ready yet. But computers have been better than reality at special effects for years. Live-action movies already use computers for all the difficult bits. So when you’re setting the entire movie inside a computer, the whole world’s a stage: a special-effects stage loaded with pyrotechnics. And when you consider that Crysis 3 is about a nanosuit-enhanced soldier battling corrupt security forces, like the guy above, whose name is “Psycho,” and aliens, which do you think will be a bigger part of that story: facial expressions or explosions? Big-name videogames have become more like movies every year. Where once the player was a roving character exploring a maze of hallways, now they’re a single cog in a vast cinematic machine. Carefully guided from set piece to set piece by invisible walls and an omnipresent director, distributing cutscenes between every 10 explosions. Setting the game to “play” itself by hiring a director to say what happens instead of a gamer is just the logical next step in that evolution. 3. The Product Is The Advertisement Calling The 7 Wonders of Crysis 3 a fusion of video games and cinematics would be incomplete. It’s really a combination of video games, cinematics, and advertising. And that’s no bad thing. Sure, it’s blatantly designed to show off the proprietary Crytek graphics, but video games, movies, and adverts are the three fields most based on showing off amazing visuals and compelling stories that completely capture our attention. The resulting cinematic chimera has great promise. After all, Guy Ritchie has already directed an ad for Black Ops II . When the guy behind the Sherlock Holmes franchise is directing the star of that franchise in a video-game commercial, anyone who doubts they’re just as big as movies simply hasn’t been paying attention. Besides, any product is meant to be its own advertisement. Here that advice is literally true. Games As Art (And New Ideas) Hybridization always creates new ideas. And the only people still arguing about whether video games are art were eligible to retire before we started playing them. Even the most violent shooter can be stuffed with artistic flourish and deeper meanings. Bioshock was a beautiful steampunk fantasy which turned a generation onto Atlas Shrugged . The “soldier shoots other soldiers, also aliens” might not sound like a vehicle for quite as much content, but it’s beautiful. Crysis has always been about binaries, and not just in the 1s and 0s that make it happen. Every aspect of the games has a duality. You fight armed human soldiers, then inexplicable aliens. You’re outfitted with state-of-the-art technology but find yourself enmeshed in nature. You’re encased in a nanotechnological miracle of body-enhancing armor and you find yourself wielding a bow and arrow. And it looks awesome. And it looks awesome. The series started on Dec 12. You can watch the first episode right now on the Crysis YouTube channel . (Be sure to choose max HD quality for the full effect.) Luke McKinney loves the real world, but only because it has movies and video games in it. He responds to every tweet . Follow Luke McKinney on Twitter. Follow Movieline on Twitter.
Now that the Twilight movies are over, Kristen Stewart must know that her 15 minutes could run out any day now, which probably explains why she’s been stepping up her game lately. Here she is going see-through for the On the Road premiere, and I hear you get to see a whole lot more of Kristen in the actual movie. Apparently, for most of it, she’s wearing nothing but a scowl. Hot. » view all 13 photos Related Articles: Kristen Stewart Does Toronto Kristen Stewart’s Golfing Short Shorts Kristen Stewart Fills Out A T-Shirt Nicely Kristen Stewart Flashes Her Angry Face Photos: WENN.com
Now that the Twilight movies are over, Kristen Stewart must know that her 15 minutes could run out any day now, which probably explains why she’s been stepping up her game lately. Here she is going see-through for the On the Road premiere, and I hear you get to see a whole lot more of Kristen in the actual movie. Apparently, for most of it, she’s wearing nothing but a scowl. Hot. » view all 13 photos Related Articles: Kristen Stewart Does Toronto Kristen Stewart’s Golfing Short Shorts Kristen Stewart Fills Out A T-Shirt Nicely Kristen Stewart Flashes Her Angry Face Photos: WENN.com
Poor Elmo got janky junk . Via NYPost reports : The fourth man to come forward to accuse “Sesame Street’’ puppeteer Kevin Clash of inappropriate sexual contact says the voice of Elmo had trouble getting it up as he was trying to get down with his alleged victim. “Kevin Clash told [his accuser] he had difficulty . . . due to a medical condition,” according to the new accuser’s civil lawsuit filed yesterday in Manhattan federal court. The alleged victim, now 33, said he was about 16 when he first met Clash, then 35, in 1995 while walking on a Miami beach. The two started talking — Clash complimented him on his looks, the man said — and the pair kept in touch over the phone. After learning that the accuser had problems at home and wanted to run away, Clash, the voice of Elmo for 28 years until he resigned last month, promised to “be a dad” to him. Clash lured the young man to the city “with promises to pay for his plane ticket . . . and give him cash and a free place to stay,” according to the lawsuit, in which Clash’s latest accuser remains unnamed. “[The accuser] had been abused by a teacher when he was 15 and was initially very leery of Kevin. But Kevin convinced him he would be safe” — by disclosing he was the man behind the world’s most beloved muppet, said the plaintiff’s lawyer, Miami-based Jeff Herman, who is also representing two other accusers. “As soon as he got to New York, Kevin told him he was the voice of Elmo,” Herman said. The accuser stayed with Clash only a few days, when the abuse is alleged to have happened. Herman said that because Clash is alleged to have transported his accuser across state lines for the purpose of engaging in sexual activity, he could face criminal charges. “The lawsuit is without merit, and we will vigorously defend the case and Mr. Clash’s reputation,” said Michael Berger, a lawyer for Clash, reiterating what the puppeteer’s camp has said each time the other claims were made public. A doorman at Clash’s Upper West Side apartment building yesterday said the Muppet master, a divorced dad with a college-age daughter, has not been seen in some time. The latest accuser said that being a parental figure was a role Clash liked to play — and another alleged victim has echoed that. “ ‘Mr. Tickler’ is what I will call him, and the game we played was father and son,” a previous accuser, who claims he also was 16 when he and Clash hooked up, wrote in an unpublished memoir. Herman added yesterday: “These are all vulnerable boys. None of them had father figures in their lives, and they were looking for that father figure. There’s a consistency.” Abuse charges against Clash, now 52, first surfaced last month. After the first accusation was made public, Clash released a statement that said he was gay and admitted the relationship but said it was between two consenting adults. He resigned when a second accuser came forward — college student Cecil Singleton, now 24, who sued him for $5 million. Singleton and another accuser said Clash was trolling for young boys on a gay telephone chat line and that he lied about his age. Herman said other possible victims have been in contact with him and that he is in the process of vetting them. No wonder Elmo’s such a tickle monster, he couldn’t even use that thang for nothing but a lil tickling. Life just keeps getting more and more embarrassing for this guy. SMH. AP Images
Taylor Swift likes that dark meat?? Taylor Swift Talks About Young Buck Taylor Swift, America’s country darling, sat own with VIBE magazine and revealed how she is taking more risks with her fourth album release. As well as discussing her latest album, the singer talked about her love of hip hop as well as a certain former G-Unit rapper… On her love of hip-hop: I love hip-hop! The first song I memorized was “Fireman” by Lil Wayne. Ever since then…it’s Nicki Minaj, Wiz Khalifa, the Game. When I was in high school, my boyfriend and I would drive around and he’d always point to this neighborhood where [rapper] Young Buck lived. We would drive and look at his cars and be like, “Oh my gawd! Those cars are so cool! I wonder if he’s in there!” Can you imagine Taylor dating Buck? And then writing some struggle filled break-up song about how he did her dirty with some groupies and messed up her credit. You know what they say, once you go Black… you end up a baby mama.
In today’s sports media world, words like “greatest,” “legendary,” “epic,” or “all-time” are overused to say the least. This clip may be an appropriate cause for superlatives, however. When Appalachian State center Brian Okam stepped to the free throw line Saturday against Western Carolina, he put worth what was easily the worst attempt in history: Worst Free Throw Ever Words really can’t describe the greatness of that video. The free throw line is 15 feet from the plane of the backboard in NCAA play. Okam’s shot made it maybe five. Perhaps the ball slipped out of his hand? Or he was distracted by something? Amazingly, he was not asked about it after the game, but the Western Carolina TV analyst calling the game summed it up best: “I’m not sure what that was. Good lord.” SIDE NOTE: WCU won 70-64, adding injury to insult for Brian.
Does this guy ever mind his own damn business? Donald Trump is weighing in on the drama between Halle Berry and her ex-boo Gabriel Aubry . Trump took to his regular forum, Twitter to air out his grievance with the Oscar winning actress: Trump can be on some dumb isht sometimes but we saw the photos of Catch Fade Gabe and he definitely got the knockout treatment.. US Weekly is also reporting that friends of the family have concerns Nahla is being treated like a pawn in the game between Catch Fade Gabe and Halle: “They keep playing this game and Nahla is used as a pawn,” a confidante says of the soft-spoken pre-schooler in the new Us Weekly, out now. “It’s her I feel sorry for.” Says another source of the Cloud Atlas star, who has a history of volatile romances: “All [Halle] wants is a normal family life.” Fortunately TMZ is reporting that things are looking up for the troubled family with both sides lawyers working together: There are strong signs … Gabriel Aubry, Halle Berry and Olivier Martinez have called a truce in their Thanksgiving Day war … TMZ has learned. The big, big guns just showed up in family court … Blair Berk, who reps Halle, and Shawn Holley, who reps Gabriel. Sources familiar with the situation tell TMZ … Berk, Holley and other lawyers spent hours yesterday trying to resolve the differences that led to the explosion of anger in Halle’s driveway. Berk and Holley straddle both areas of the law — criminal and family — and them showing up together is a sign they may have reached a peace accord. We’re told Halle and Olivier will not be present in court, so it’s highly unlikely either side is asking for an extension of a restraining order since the key witnesses are not there to testify. Gabriel just showed up wearing sunglasses. It would appear the lawyers will talk to the judge about the terms of a settlement. We hope for Nahla’s sake that things get worked out sooner rather than later. We’d hate for her to see her Daddy get treated like a punching bag again. WENN
