What to say about the first glimpse of Curly, Moe and Larry in the Farrelly Brothers’ long-awaited updating of The Three Stooges ? That Halloween came early for Will Sasso, Chris Diamantopoulos and Sean Hayes? Really, I’ve got nothing. Help?
The Guinness Book of World Records isn’t just for nausea-inducing photos of 50-inch fingernails and fat twins on motorcycles anymore. The sprawling oracle of milestones far and wide has gone practical this week, revealing the screen actor whose body of work has accrued the highest collective gross in history. It’s not the most obvious fellow, but considering his ubiquity, franchise successes and long trail of cultural landmarks, it makes sense. Think hard, and read on for the answer to the trivia question you’ll be flinging with relish all weekend.
But she has to share with J.R. Martinez, who also scores a 29 on Broadway night. By Kelley L. Carter Ricki Lake and Derek Hough Photo: ABC It was Broadway week on ABC’s “Dancing With the Stars,” and naturally, the theatrics were high. The cast of Broadway’s “Sister Act” performed, as did Emmy winner Kristin Chenoweth. The remaining celebrities pulled out all the stops with creative costumes and over-the-top performances. This also was the first time the celebrities danced a group performance, to “Hey Big Spender” from “Sweet Charity” and “Money” from “Cabaret.” The performance didn’t get scored, but the judges commented and thought it was a fitting tribute. As for the dances that were scored, it was a dead heat at the top of the board between war hero J.R. Martinez and former talk-show host Ricki Lake, who impressed the judges with their takes on the quickstep. Here’s how everyone fared: Rob Kardashian and Cheryl Burke The duo took on a tune from “Jersey Boys,” the Four Seasons’ “Walk Like a Man,” and danced the cha-cha. The judges found the performance to be a bit muted and not at all daring for a high-stakes week like this. “It was clean. It was precise. It had good timing. Each dance gives you new challenges. The cha-cha-cha has got to show rhythm. There was no rhythm. It was all too stiff. It wasn’t oily. It was a bit … starchy,” head judge Len Goodman said. 22/30 Nancy Grace and Tristan MacManus The TV host was asked to do more after last week, when they found her routine to be a bit drab; this week, they took on the foxtrot and danced to a tune from “Spamalot.” The judges said the pair upped the ante and considered her performance to be a showstopper. They thought much more of her personality came out and she performed with great flair, earning her highest score in the competition. “It’s Nancy Dance-alot! I’ve seen the musical, and you captured the theme of it, and yet you did a foxtrot. Well done!” Bruno Tonioli said. 24/30 David Arquette and Kym Johnson The actor earned his highest score of the season last week, and he said he wanted to keep that momentum going and stay at the top. They danced “We Go Together” from “Grease” and did the quickstep. The judges thought it was rough around the edges but high-energy and fun. “It’s a really tough number to live up to. But as far as performance goes, I thought you completely lived up to any expectation that we’d have for ‘We Go Together’ from ‘Grease.’ It’s not easy. That was the good side. The bad side: You guys were out of sync today. But … there was a fluidity that was going. You just got a little ahead of yourself,” Carrie Ann Inaba said. 23/30 Ricki Lake and Derek Hough The former talk-show host and actress had previously dominated the leaderboard but fell last week to the #5 position after failing to impress the judges during ’80s week. Also a former Broadway star, Lake was hoping that would give her the edge during Monday night’s competition. They danced the quickstep to a track from “Guys and Dolls,” and the judges gave her a standing ovation. “You don’t need luck if you’ve got talent. And this number, you proved your talent. I loved it,” Goodman said. 29/30 Chaz Bono and Lacey Schwimmer The activist tangoed to a track from “Phantom of the Opera,” and he was hoping his newfound confidence from last week would continue in Monday night’s performance. The judges thought it was the most aggressive they’ve seen him, but think that he needs to be pushed a little further. “It was like watching a cute little penguin trying to be a big menacing bird of prey. This is the truth: It has to be menacing. Dark. Dangerous. Naughty. The tango wants to be driven continuously. It is hard. It’s very difficult. To me, this character didn’t fit you,” Tonioli said. 19/30 Hope Solo and Maksim Chmerkovskiy
Looks like Common is a legitimate writer, now! The Chicago MC can now add “best-selling author” to his title. The book, One Day It’ll All Make Sense , has gotten rave reviews and is now one of the highest selling books in the country. The book debuted at number 20. Congrats! His album, The Dreamer, The Believer , also drops in November. Looks like 2011 is shaping up to be huge for Mr. Common Sense.
Rob Kardashian may have been the night’s most improved dancer, but Ricki Lake’s flashy moves during the jive earned her the highest score of the night. The Dancing With the Stars contender, who scored a 23 to lead the pack, is happy about that result – but even more pleased about her shrinking body. Lake, who said she was inspired by former contestant Kirstie Alley’s weight loss on DWTS last season, has already dropped 12 pounds and several sizes. “I’m really getting in great shape,” the talk show host said afterward. “I’ll be wearing less and less clothing. The smaller I get, the less will be covered.” Watch Ricki deliver Monday night’s best routine here: Ricki Lake on Dancing With the Stars (Week 2)
What do you get when you take the cartoon/live-action interplay of Who Framed Roger Rabbit? , remove the classic WB/Disney characters, and replace them with loud, gurgling, predatory sexual freaks? You get goofy gonorrhea and the 1992 bomb Cool World starring Moneyball -er Brad Pitt, a perverted young Gabriel Byrne, and Kim Basinger, an Oscar winner who exhibits the dramatic range of Claudia Schiffer. This movie’s bad because it’s drawn that way.
“[ Hysteria director Tanya] Wexler said she gave everybody on set a vibrator. But getting them there caused a bit of embarrassment for a security guard at a Heathrow airport luggage checkpoint. ‘The officer said, “You have 20 or 30 small electronic devices in your luggage,” and I said, “Yes, they’re vibrators,” and the guy just said, “Move along,”‘ she recalled. [Maggie] Gyllenhaal said she was awash with gift vibrators from friends by the end of filming.” Yowza! So, uh, why isn’t there more post-Toronto buzz ? [ NYDN ]
The Web experienced one of those slow-news-week stirrings last weekend when a seller on eBay put up incontrovertible photographic evidence (ahem) of Nicolas Cage chilling for a portrait back around the time of the Civil War. Cage is undead, the argument (AHEM) went, and so what better way to capitalize on this bracing phenomenological development than to unload the 19th-century artifact to the highest bidder? Anyway, that auction came and went, but not without the definitive, deeply necessary 60-second animated recap you were praying for.
Last anyone heard from team Human Centipede , led by the redoubtable, utterly demented filmmaker Tom Six, the third film in the series was eyeing a U.S. setting . Those plans might go south depending on whether or not Six and Co. can even get the controversial Human Centipede Part 2: Full Sequence screened uncut and uncensored when it opens Stateside next month — an inevitability that a new, NSFW Australian teaser wouldn’t have you count on.