Pippa Middleton has been taking far too long to disgrace her family for a little revenge on her sister and parents for favoring her sister….I would have predicted these pics of her ass in a skirt would have been her fisting herself if you had asked me at the Royal Wedding I wasn’t invited to…..I figure 6 months is enough time being second rate with feeling on inadequacy to turn on them by filming your own porn and developing drug habits to deal with the pain of never being a princess like her sister….but all I got today was pics of her ass looking shitty in a skirt…I am let down…she needs to be more broken…fuck.
Having just signed a lucrative party planning book deal , is the newly-single Pippa Middleton already playing the field again? That’s the rumor of the day. Merely one week after she and financier / crickter beau Alex Loudon called time on their relationship, she was seen back out with her ex George Percy. Then, she was spotted laughing it up at a tennis match with another fellow, who has yet to be identified (not for lack of trying by UK tabloids) … Pippa Middleton was actually accompanied by two mystery men at London’s ATP World Tour Final between Roger Federer and Jo-Wilfiried Tsonga over the weekend. At various points during the match, a smiling and laughing Pippa, donning a perfectly preppy navy blue blazer for the occasion, was seen chatting comfortably. And looking stylish and cute as ever, but that goes without saying. For now, reports suggest all her male companions seem to be of the simply-friends variety (she has been known to maintain those), but time will tell. Who should Pippa marry?
It looks like Pippa Middleton is now the UK’s most eligible bachelorette. Duchess Catherine’s younger sister, who became the planet’s best-known bridesmaid in April, has reportedly split with Alex Loudon , her longtime boyfriend. Kate Middleton has been consoling her kid sister after the breakup with Loudon, a former professional cricket player and current London financial manger. He and Pippa Middleton are said to have split up this month after a series of arguments – and lingering tension over her celebrity / sex symbol status. A source told The Sun (UK) that Pippa, who spent last weekend with William and Kate, was trying to get over the split: “This time it’s over. They are barely speaking.” People close to them said the attention focused on Pippa got to Alex. The source revealed: “It was said after the royal wedding that Alex was jealous of Pippa flirting with Prince Harry. But the truth is she and Harry are just mates.” Other friends claimed the couple’s increasing bust-ups, including a huge public one in September, stemmed Loudon not being able to cope with Pip’s celebrity. In any case, Pippa, who works at her family’s event planning company Party Pieces, and is said to be close to a book deal , is in no rush to find a new fella. But when she is, a friend of hers tells the tabloid: “She’s always gone for sporty guys. Whoever is lucky enough to win her affections will have to be athletic.” Better start working out, fellas.
I wrote to Kate Upton and Chrissy Tiegan, not that they read what I wrote, but that’s the beauty of twitter…..either way I tweeeted to them that I would take their pictures that already live on twitter, save them to my computer, put them up to my site and write some useless drivel about their lives, cuz I don’t have a life of my own, and instead of being at the party with them, offering you my perspective of the shit, I just post their shit along with every other internet loser and say how hot it is….cuz it is hot…. Since I’m a man of his word…sometimes, when it is convenient, here are pics of some bikini models hanging out in costume, one a skeleton getting sucked, the other a toddler in tiara getting her ass sniffed, in a way that makes me wish I wasn’t in a committed relationship with my couch…and reminds us that we were at the wrong party last night… But luckily re-using other people’s pictures everyone else posts is as good as being there and it is starting to depress me…..but then I look at these pictures and realize how good they are…and that I can’t actually compete, or be depressed when pussy like this exists…. so I’ll just go along with this hotness….along with everyone else….Now here are some good girls using twitter right… Thanks Chrissy Tiegan and Kate Upton for reminding us life doesn’t suck for everyone…
Pippa Middleton has wronged us yet again…I’ve been banking on this theory of being the second rate citizen in her family theory that she will end up slutting out to get noticed….you know cuz all sisters hate each other, are jealous of each other, resent each other, and in those sisterly rivalries, one of the sisters isn’t a fucking princess who is going to be queen…you know pretty much outdoing Pippa in a way she’d never be able to compete with…and sure she can pretend to be happy about the bitch’s situation…but you know it eats her up inside… So I’m figuring all this slut watch attention from the media is giving her enough attention to not want to slut out for attention cuz she doesn’t have to….when I see her on Halloween rocking this outfit, totally not slutty, I realize she’s not hungry enough to get noticed because she’s getting noticed and that is why I am putting a moratorium on Pippa posts…in hopes it’ll turn her into that slut I want her to be… These pictures mock us.
Here are some seemingly boring paparazzi pics of Pippa Middleton but that’s only if you look a them for what they are…shitty masturbation material…but if you scratch the surface of her feelings of being second rate to her sister…you know the least favorite one…that there is an inner slut ready to explode out of these litle black dress to either shock, get noticed or more importantly, disappoint her family by making them look like the commoners they are…cuz she’s only human…and there’s only so much she can take…like there is only so much non-slutty Pippa I can take…she needs to pick up the pace. Here’s some pics of her in a little black dress making progress….
The Pippa Middleton Slut Watch continues. Sure she’s not doing anything slutty yet, but it is just a matter of time, maybe when the whole feelings of being a second rate version of her sister in the eyes of everyone actually sets in, you know after a few years and the baby/future King is born and all attention heads there way forcing her to snap in some hopefully long – drawn out – slutty episode that involves me seeing her naked in picture/video or in some weird turn of events on my face….only time will tell and if I don’t die before her dignity, pride, shame, then I’ll be here to expose it. That’s a promise.
Here’s some hard Alessandra Amrbosio, brazilian model and mom, going to some expensive restaurant with some ridiculous outfit, covering up her long legs, like she’s not paid to get HALF NAKED on the regular by some evil corporation who owns the rights to her and her body….because thats what happens when you sell your soul to the devil to leave your small catholic Brazilian poverty filled life….for the glamor of corporate American luxury…. These pictures would be more interesting on a beach, in a bikini, or in a catalog in a thong where she belongs…but as a bottom feeder I take what I can get…
I feel like my day isn’t complete unless I post a Pippa Middleton post. I have every boring photo set I come across of hers, you know like it is my life calling to document her every move until she fucking cracks and gets sucked into all the attention she’s getting, and embraces it the way she should, by getting naked, in efforts to make a name for herself, and break free from her sister’s perfect little princess shadow…I’m talking seducing Prince William and releasing the fucking sex tape, to let everyone know who the fucking princess is now…you know the kind of crackin’ up that happens with years of feeling second rate….but until that happens, her leaving her house is the best we get….and since it is my life work to document her, that’s good enough for me…
Here’s my favorite second rate citizen, at least in terms of her immediate family, because her sister is an actual princess, while she’s just the old spinster living off her parents, instead of the Royal Family….and I know that girls are generally pretty self involved and only care about their immediate surrounds and even hate their own best friends cuz it’s just all part of being a girl…so it’s gotta be pretty hard on her and she must be plotting the takeover…. Sure these tight pants in pictures that are not taken from behind or spread eagled the way I want them to be…aren’t as good as her panty flash or what I think we have coming…but think of it as practice for what’s to come…
