Tag Archives: she-performed

Tale of the NFL Playoff Tape: Baltimore Ravens vs. New England Patriots

We’re down to the final four in the NFL. On Sunday, the Baltimore Ravens do battle with the New England Patriots, while the New York Giants head to San Francisco to face the 49ers. Which teams will be featured in a Super Bowl that also includes a mostly naked David Beckham ? We break down the key categories of the first match up below… CONNECTION TO GOD : Ravens: Middle linebacker Ray Lewis is an ordained minster. Patriots: Blew away Tim Tebow and the Broncos last week, 45-10. Edge: Patriots UNIVERSITY STARTING QUARTERBACK ATTENDED : Ravens: Delaware Patriots: Michigan Edge: Ravens RECORDS BROKEN BY STARTING QUARTERBACKS : Ravens: Worst facial hair Patriots: Most touchdown passes in a single season Edge: Patriots MASCOT REPRESENTS: Ravens: The most widely distributed of all corvids Patriots: A patriotic freedom fighter Edge: Patriots TYPICAL FAN : Ravens: Unclear Patriots: Drunk Masshole Edge: Ravens THE VERDICT: The Patriots pull it out, three categories to two. Blame Joe Flacco’s Fu Manchu, as well as his poor passing ability, for the inevitable loss by the Ravens. WHO DO YOU THINK WILL WIN?

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Tale of the NFL Playoff Tape: Baltimore Ravens vs. New England Patriots

Seven Rules For Dating Bachelorette Emily Maynard

Emily Maynard has been confirmed as The Bachelorette , a full six months before the summer premiere and well before filming has even begun on the new season. While ABC has not officially announced that the 26-year-old North Carolinian will star on the show, it’s been reported by People , EW, E! News and numerous others. It’s happening, and the casting was likely leaked early on purpose. That’s because Emily Maynard is a different kind of Bachelorette , and guys had better know what they’re in for. Here’s a little tip sheet for prospective suitors … Ricki, Ricki, Ricki . Maynard and her 6-year-old daughter, are incredibly close. So much show that production is moving to their hometown of Charlotte, N.C. Any fellas coming on The Bachelorette are really wooing two women. The past matters . Maynard lost her fiance, NASCAR driver Ricky Hendrick, at age 19. Days after Ricky’s death, Maynard learned she was pregnant. She named their only child after him, and remains close to his family. The more recent past matters . While it didn’t work out with Brad Womack after The Bachelor , he and Maynard are still close. Womack “taught me that I have it in me to love again,” Emily said. “He’s always going to be a part of my life.” Image matters . As a mother, Emily is not likely to be sexualized or over-the-top in her pursuit of a good time on the show. Guys should act accordingly. Patience is a priority . A beautiful Southern belle, Maynard can find a date any time she wants, but a lasting relationship is a different story. Any potential mate must be prepared that this courtship will be an unconventional one. No douchebags please . Seriously, as offensive as Bentley Williams was on Ashley Hebert’s season, a return by that ass clown would be 10 times worse. Hope you like Charlotte . It’s a vibrant, booming city. One you’re likely to live in for a long time if you want to be with Emily. Just saying.

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Seven Rules For Dating Bachelorette Emily Maynard

Katy Perry Unfollows Russell Brand on Twitter

Katy Perry is cutting ties with Russell Brand in EVERY WAY. The 27-year-old pop singer has unfollowed her soon-to-be ex-husband on Twitter. As of Friday afternoon (a slow news Friday afternoon) Perry no longer follows Brad. She is still one of the 78 people Brand subscribes to however. It’s not surprising, given that Perry is only communicating with Brand, 36, via phone or email. “She’s limiting those interactions,” a source says of the couple. “He’s being so atrocious, she feels like she never really knew him.” Perry has been keeping Brand off her mind by focusing on her career: she performed in Jakarta, Indonesia, on Thursday, and she recently shot an Adidas ad. “She doesn’t want to look battered and have people for sorry for her,” a source says . “She’s very strong and confident and looking forward to the next chapter.” She’s the most cheat-worthy star on the planet according to married guys, if she ever needs a little confidence boost. Or some amoral companionship. [Photo: WENN.com]

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Katy Perry Unfollows Russell Brand on Twitter

Rihanna Sings "California King Bed" on American Idol

Rihanna changed up her look yet again last night on American Idol, going back to long red curly locks after a week or so of wearing her hair much, much shorter. The 23-year-old singer showed her latest look as she performed her new single, “California King Bed” live. She started the song softly, tantalizing fans. As her dancers pulled down white draping onto the stage floor and into the crowd, Rihanna was eventually revealed and really ramped up the performance. She even threw in some air guitar as the audience went wild, earning her a standing O. Watch her performance from the American Idol results show here: Rihanna – California King Bed (American Idol)

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Rihanna Sings "California King Bed" on American Idol

Help Caption These Photos of Jesse Eisenberg Hang Gliding

If there was ever a perfect afternoon for a hang gliding lesson in Rio de Janeiro, it was today. At least that’s what new photos of Rio star Jesse Eisenberg suggest. The normally serious actor looks like he was having a ball learning valuable lessons of flight. Since Movieline HQ is in a “joining” mood this afternoon, let’s all throw on our best sporting helmet and glide through the jump to caption the hilarious/adorable full-size images.

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Help Caption These Photos of Jesse Eisenberg Hang Gliding

Black Swan Ballerina Says Natalie Portman Basically Didn’t Dance

I was almost positive we’d never have to talk about awful-ass Black Swan again, but here comes a kick-ass, scorned ballerina with a tale to tell: Sarah Lane, a 27-year-old American Ballet Theater soloist who worked as a body double on Black Swan , tells EW that there’s a “cover-up” to prevent people from knowing she performed 95% of the cygnet moves in the movie. Now, I can’t guarantee that Sarah isn’t wearing black wings and circling her house right now like a crazed Sean Young type, but her quotes sound legitimate.

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Black Swan Ballerina Says Natalie Portman Basically Didn’t Dance

Liz Hurley Crazy Cleavage of the Day

Aged or not…when you fill out your dress like this…it just doesn’t matter. If anything being old is an advantage, cuz the only 18 year olds hormonal enough to pull off this kind of cleavage is usually not on that sized of a frame but instead in line at McDonalds for seconds cuz the first double Big Mac wasn’t enough for her….It takes years of getting fucked to blossom like this and when it comes to middel-aged pussy, there’s a sweetspot where they aren’t too old, or overly sloppy and disgustingly aged living in an Old Folk’s Home, where you’d only fuck them if you were working the old folks home late at night and their hearing aid was off for bed so she couldn’t hear you moving in on her, or remember the next day cuz of senility, and even if she did, she’d appreciate your cock, cuz it has been 20 years since their husband died and they just couldn’t bring themselves to move onto someone new….I mean….Liz Hurley hasn’t completely lost her sex appeal, even to guys who like bitches under 25… I’m not even a tit guy…I’m just a guy and if a 70 year old retarded girl with AIDS in a ski helmet was banging her head against the wall long enough for me to mount her, stacked like this or not, I’d mount her but then again, history has proven that I would pretty much fuck anything that has a vagina and that isn’t “that” dead…

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Liz Hurley Crazy Cleavage of the Day

Rihanna Half Naked for GQ of the Day

Here are some grimey pictures, probably shot by Terry Richardson, of Rihanna showing off her gutter tattoos in her underwear like the gutter trash she is and I like it…. I don’t know, I’m inconsistent with this bitch, I went through a period where i thought she was hot when she was doing the pop tart thing, then I started hating her after she sold out her man for putting her in her place, and her shit became more and more fucking dull to me, but then she performed on TV, she tapped into her island, raised in a shanty to a garbage man, sucking off dudes at 14, woulda been a mom of 12 if she never left hustle. I keep playing that American Music Awards dance routine out and whenever I hear the song I see the shit… As far as I’m concerned, she’s back, for now. TO Watch the Rihanna AMA Performance That Made me Fall in Love FOLLOW THIS LINK Here are her GQ pics doing good enough for me…

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Rihanna Half Naked for GQ of the Day

Miley Cyrus Makes Out with Dancer, Reaches New Low

We guess this is an example of your “art,” too, right, Miley Cyrus? A day after the singer said her raunchy antics were artistic, and lashed out at critics for just not getting it , she performed “Can’t Be Tamed” on Britain’s Got Talent and took the desperate, wholly unoriginal step of making out with a dancer in order to prove her edginess. First base is reached around the 1:15 mark below: Making Out Miley There’s little that can even be said about Miley’s transparent actions at this point. It’s fine for her to move beyond the Disney phase of her career, but there’s something to be said for subtlety and creativity. Dressing in skimpy outfits, singing about how hot you are and kissing back-up dancers has been done by everyone from Christina Aguilera to Britney Spears. It’s especially galling when Cyrus claims her songs and her style aren’t representative of typical, shallow pop music . That’s simply laughable. At least when Adam Lambert crossed a line at the 2009 AMAs, he came out and admitted it soon afterwards. Will Miley do the same? We somehow doubt it.

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Miley Cyrus Makes Out with Dancer, Reaches New Low

Fashion Police: Leona Lewis’ Dress So Fierce It’ll Slap You in the Face

Leona Lewis was at MTV’s European Music Awards yesterday where she performed her latest single “Happy.” She had walked the red carpet in harem pants so we weren’t…

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Fashion Police: Leona Lewis’ Dress So Fierce It’ll Slap You in the Face