Here’s Jonanna Krupa at the The Real Housewives of Miami Season 3 premiere party with her douche fiance/boyfriend/whatever the script of the show wants them to be. If I sound jealous it’s because I am. I’ve been working Joanna on Twitter for a long time and back in the day I’d get a response, but not any more now that she’s a “housewife. It’s sad because all I wanted was to be friends with Jo and maybe once in a while “accidentally” touch her boobs. I guess the only way for that to happen now, is for them to cast me in the show, which obviously would be the smartest thing for them to do. Call me.
Kenya went in on that a**. Kenya Moore Calls Phaedra Parks A Liar According to Kenya’s Bravo blog We have seen the extreme lows of how far Phaedra is willing to stoop by what she did to NeNe, me, and Angela Stanton (the woman who claims that Phaedra was involved in insurance fraud) and anyone else who dares to cross her. She even went as far as to recruit my ex as a client and advised him to exploit himself by lying about the status of our relationship in staged radio interviews. The nuances of her statements give it away… “They called him”. How would she know that had she not been directly communication with him? Phaedra will never be the smartest woman in the room if I’m also present. She’s obsessed with trying to hurt me but she will continue to lose that battle in perpetuity. With her alleged illegal dealings and random and ridiculous business ventures, she is not only a proven liar, an embarrassment to her family, as well as the laughing stock of the law industry. Her vicious gratuitous retaliatory actions are never warranted, including Angela Stanton’s testimony. Are we all wrong? Judge for yourself. With that said, I wish Apollo all the best. Phaedra, girl a lot of people are coming for your neck. We’re not saying what they say is true, but…..it don’t look good. Bravo
Jack Reacher , protagonist of Lee Child’s brilliant series of airport pulp, has sold nearly 40 million books. He’s also blonde, ugly, 6’5” and 250 lbs, which means the difference between the Reacher that fans love and Tom Cruise , who plays him in his long-awaited film debut, is literally sizable: Ten inches and 90 lbs, to be exact, and a whole lot of handsome. Child’s Jack Reacher is homeless, and for the well-coiffed Cruise, playing a guy who shops as Goodwill is as much of a stretch as hoping no one will notice his larger-than-life ex-military cop is barely taller than his co-star Rosamund Pike . (Which in real life, he’s not — Pike towers over him by two inches.) In the original novel, One Shot , Reacher spends half of the book pacing the surprisingly mean streets of a sleepy Midwestern city trying to unravel a shocking sniper attack that left five civilians dead. The flick opens with the crime — watching through crosshairs as the killer selects his targets is agonizingly tense — and in eight minutes, it’s solved and the murderer is in prison. Unlike in the book, McQuarrie shows us something the police don’t know: the face of the killer is different than the man behind bars. Yet not only is the evidence against the accused so perfect that his lawyer (Pike) merely hopes to get his sentence reduced to life in prison, here comes Jack Reacher, the accused’s old enemy, rolling into town on a Greyhound bus to make sure he gets the death penalty. Reacher is a brute with an odd moral code. When someone has what he wants — be it information he needs or a sports car he wants to borrow — he’ll twist their arms (literally) until it’s his. And he’s not just mean to men: he’ll leave women alone in dark alleys, and he’ll call a barely legal bimbo a “slut.” But if someone hurts that slut — at least, someone besides him — he turns into a heat-seeking missile of muscles, a jackal who won’t stop running until he catches his prey. So bringing Jack Reacher to the screen means Cruise has a lot to measure up to, but instead of swinging for the fences, he bunts. His Reacher is like every other character Cruise has ever played: Tough, cocky, and the smartest guy in the room. It’s the Tom Cruise paradox; he’s a great actor who’s stopped acting. He can’t vanish into a role, but then he doesn’t have to. Audiences show up to his films just to see his latest ass-kicking adventure, which makes Cruise the inverse James Bond — instead of different actors playing the same character, he’s one actor who plays the same character under a dozen different names. You could pretend his entire last decade onscreen is just Ethan Hunt going deep undercover to save the day. Luckily for director Christopher McQuarrie , Jack Reacher is also tough, cocky, and the smartest guy in the room. A former Army policeman and genius investigator, he’s always three steps ahead of his rivals and he loves making sure they know it. He’s so physically gifted that he makes his attackers look like the Three Stooges, and so mercilessly aggressive that he aims straight for his enemies’ eyes, knees and groins. Even hanging up a payphone, his elbow snaps like he’d rather be breaking someone’s neck. And yet, even this film’s last minute name change from One Shot to Jack Reacher does nothing to convince us that we’re watching a fictional Army vet named Jack Reacher — we’re watching Tom Cruise , and for fans of his, that’s enough. For fans of Child’s books, however, the pleasures are more complicated. With, oh, 100 of the book’s 376 pages occupied by Reacher’s inward deductive reasoning, McQuarrie faced the risk of a flick that was all voiceover. Instead, he flips the script; Cruise silently pads around looking smart and we’re meant to see his the gears in his head grinding. The film’s more fun when he finally opens his mouth to insult his ever-growing list of enemies, including a sour DA ( Richard Jenkins ), a cop who accuses him of murder ( David Oyelowo ), some rednecks (Alexia Fast and Josh Helman), a couple of vicious hitmen (Michael Raymond-James and Jai Courtney , co-star of the next Die Hard ) and the big boss, a four-fingered Gulag survivor named The Zec ( Werner Herzog ). Herzog is perfect for the role: he’s made a career of grimly muttering “death” and “murder.” He’s only in the movie for ten minutes — far too short — but he has one stand-out scene where he orders an underling to bite off his own thumb or get shot in the head, an at-any-cost survival instinct that Herzog’s been hunting for in his own films for decades. Alas, the weakness of the film is the weakness of the book. The Zec’s evil plan is both byzantinely complicated and pifflingly mundane. We already know the face of the killer. What we don’t know is why , and the big reveal is more of a “Huh?” McQuarrie, the writer of The Usual Suspects who also adapted One Shot himself, is still finding his legs as a director. Jack Reacher has the bright and empty look of television and is a bit unsteady as it wavers between action and laughs. But the flick is great entertainment as Reacher headbutts his way to the Zec, dutifully and casually giving nods to devotees of the books, even casting Lee Child in a cameo as a police officer who returns to Reacher the only thing he owns: a portable toothbrush. (Explains Reacher in the book Bad Luck and Trouble , “I carry a spare shirt, pretty soon I’m carrying spare pants. Then I’d need a suitcase. Next thing I know, I’ve got a house and a car and a savings plan and I’m filling out all kinds of forms.”) Beat by beat, Jack Reacher is just like Child’s paperbacks in the best possible way: it’s fast, fun, and smarter than it looks. Will it give Tom Cruise another hit action franchise? It deserves to. Hollywood has 17 other Jack Reacher books to pick from, any one of which would fit seamlessly into the Cruise canon. But for Child, the real question is, how many hit films will it take for Cruise fans to remember Jack Reacher’s name? Amy Nicholson is a critic, playwright and editor. Her interests include hot dogs, standard poodles, Bruce Willis, and comedies about the utter futility of existence. Follow her on Twitter . Follow Movieline on Twitter .
GQ released some new Kate Upton pics from their hot photoshoot they did with her because GQ is milking the smartest move they’ve made in years, by getting Kate Upton to shoot in a wet t-shirt, risking their advertisers pulling cuz in America, nipples are bad, at least when on my site, in a time when print magazines are going bankrupt, but more importantly in a time when Kate Upton has a very small window of opportunity, and is at her peak but doesn’t know it, cuz she’s a fat chick in training cuz the rest of her body will catche up to her huge sloppy tits….they in a wet t-shirt like this was some college spring break party…..when guys everywhere are obsessed….It was well played and the goods continue….even if they aren’t as good since they lack nipple and really what’s a tit without nipple….
Truth be told, I don’t enjoy ranking films — especially at the end of a year that disappointingly lacked a single title that moved me to tears, gut-busting laughter or some kind of profound existential realization. (However there were quite a few films that inspired hopelessness for the future of cinema. See Just Go With It and Bucky Larson: Born To Be a Star . Actually, don’t see them.) But there were some titles I’d recommend and even some I wouldn’t immediately regift if they found their way under my Christmas tree/menorah this season. Behold, my fave films of 2011. As always, let me know how much you disagree with this list in the space below. 10. The Muppets In a year that lacked decent romantic comedies, The Muppets filled the feel-good movie void for me. Jim Henson’s fuzzy characters — who made their long-awaited return to the multiplex in this Jason Segel/Nick Stoller-scripted picture — have the uncanny ability to make audiences forget their cynicism — even after paying the $12 ticket price. That special power is priceless, especially when combined with the overpowering nostalgia that Kermit, Miss Piggy and the entire Henson gang induce. 9. African Cats For the record, I would watch any nature documentary narrated by Samuel L. Jackson because this Oscar nominated-actor’s intense delivery could make any non-event seem suspenseful. But this Disneynature release exceeded my expectations. Chronicling the lives of a pride of lions (led by Fang, their grizzly, fearless, snaggle-toothed superior — the equivalent to The Lion King ‘s Mufasa) and a rival family of cheetahs led by a single mother Sita, this story was at once informative and breathtakingly beautiful. The real-life footage depicted a majestic African savannah so gorgeous that it was hard to believe it was not computer-generated and a tale of death, reunion and fiercely protective paternal impulses so moving that it was difficult to comprehend that it was not scripted. Furthermore, the story of Sita’s single motherhood in the majestic African savannah is the most compelling story of single parenthood I’ve seen all year. 8. Contagion Steven Soderbergh’s cautionary virus film is my favorite horror flick of the year, mainly because it continued to inspire fear and nightmares long after my first screening. Any film that can weave together another award-worthy Kate Winslet performance and Matt Damon as an overly protective dad who stages a home prom for his quarantined daughter complete with U2 dance mix is a film friend of mine. In addition to being all of these things (and the best-paced film of the year, in my opinion), Contagion established itself as one of the best-worst cautionary tales for adulturers ever. 7. Crazy, Stupid, Love Ryan Gosling in a well-tailored suit. Emma Stone playing a head-smart female who can miraculously bait emotionally closed-off men into mature romantic relationships. Steve Carell as a dejected divorc é. Josh Grobin. A brilliant, if totally impractical and unrealistic, scene involving the Dirty Dancing lift. What I could have done without — in this Dan Fogelman-scripted film — is every other peripheral storyline including Julianne Moore’s romance with a work colleague played by Kevin Bacon, a babysitter crushing hard for Carell and makeshift miniature golf courses. Regardless, this is one of the smartest films to fall under the romantic-comedy umbrella this year. 6. Warrior Full disclosure: I am partial to any film set in Pittsburgh because I am a Steel City native. That being said, Gavin O’Connor’s sports drama was not just a welcome dose of nostalgia but a tale of repressed familial feelings and resentment told against the gritty ‘burgh backdrop. Although the whole Moby Dick audiobook situation may have been a little heavy-handed for my taste, Nick Nolte’s performance as a recovering alcoholic and sinner was crushing. Also, I prefer Tom Hardy and Joel Edgerton’s portrayal of tragically competitive brothers over Mark Wahlberg and Christian Bale’s any day of the week. 5. 50/50 I was hesitant to see a film branded a “cancer comedy” — even if it starred Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Anna Kendrick and Anjelica Huston. But when I finally did get to the theater, I discovered one of the sweetest films of the year. One that was able to tackle cancer with a heaping dose of comedy that never felt inappropriate, thanks in part to Will Reiser’s touching script and each supporting cast member who seemed responsible for bringing one major component to the movie each: Angelica Huston (sympathy), Seth Rogen (laughs), Bryce Dallas Howard (bitchiness) and Anna Kendrick (hope). Do not be afraid of 50/50 — it is one of the few films this year that really earned its uplifting ending. 4. Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol Because of the number of tabloid pages dedicated to him, I always end up discounting Tom Cruise as an actor…until I get into a movie theater and realize again, just why he is and deserves to be a movie star. Tom Cruise has a unique screen presence that demands your attention and ticket money — and when paired with Brad Bird’s impeccable direction and the stomach-churning action sequences in this fourth Mission: Impossible installment, was a sight to behold, and one that I hope I can experience very soon again. 3. Young Adult In addition to boasting one of the smartest, hilarious and most devilishly complex protagonists of the year, Young Adult introduced the wonderful Patton Oswalt as the kind of unoriginal male lead that thinking movie audiences deserve. Thank you to Juno filmmakers Jason Reitman and Diablo Cody for giving us a fresh female character who can be manipulative, bitchy and yet completely relatable — in that she understands how dulcet the nasal-y narration of Kourtney Kardashian can be when you are stained sweatpants-level depressed. 2. Melancholia So Lars von Trier’s epic end-of-the-world endeavor may not be the kind of film I’d rush back to see again anytime in the next few days — but that is because I am still digesting the dichotomy of the wildly beautiful images and disturbing apocalyptic tale of one depressed bride (Kirsten Dunst) and her improbably tolerant sister (Charlotte Gainsbourg) who see a planet approaching their own. This is the most nightmarish cinematic screensaver ever — and I mean that in the best way possible. Also, Kiefer Sutherland’s comedic relief contributions are something to be admired. (On an unrelated note, can someone please give me a final bath count for this movie? I’ve never seen depressives take to the bathtub more eagerly than the bed.) 1. The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo After reading Stieg Larsson’s Millenium series, and then sincerely enjoying the original Swedish Girl With the Dragon Tattoo — directed by Niels Arden Oplev — I did not know how David Fincher would improve upon such a solid film released so recently (2009). I should have known better than to doubt Fincher and his new muse Rooney Mara though, who transformed into the film’s dark, damaged, kick-ass heroine under the filmmaker’s expert care. The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo is easily the most electrifying and interesting thriller of the year. Follow Julie Miller on Twitter . Follow Movieline on Twitter .
Animated Short of the Day: “The Smartest Dog in the World” — a brand new Grickle toon about a cat of average intelligence. [ grickle .] Broadcasting platform : YouTube Source : The Daily What Discovery Date : 11/03/2011 03:23 Number of articles : 2
This is more like it, if you’re going to hit the red carpet, might as well do it with your breasts hanging out of your dress. You got that Katrina Bowden ? Here’s Paris Hilton at one of her many birthday parties dropping some extremely impressive cleavage for a chick with pretty much no breasts what so ever. She really knows how to work with what she’s got. Alright so she’s not exactly overflowing with front meat, some angles are more flattering than others, but if you’re into chest bones you’ll love this. Enjoy. more pictures of Paris Hilton here
These are some shots from a new Armani ad campaign featuring Megan Fox hanging out in her underwear. I think that pretty much says it all. She may not be the smartest woman around or the most talented actress or have the best judge of character when it comes to choosing a husband, but one thing is for sure, the girl has got one hell of a tight body on her. I don’t even know what she’s selling, does Armani make underwear? I don’t care, I’m buying.
Some movies are deadly accurate about capturing the way people really talk while others have an ear for how we wish everyone spoke all the time. And you can definitely sign me up for a world where the quips fly as fast, and the bitchery is as crisp, as in All About Eve (Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment). Sixty years after this Broadway-backstage comedy-drama snagged a Best Picture Oscar, it remains a sterling example of American movies at their smartest and most entertaining.
Photo: people will always need plates Our friends over at the design blog Dezeen have launched a pop-up shop in the smartest part of town. Calling it Temporium, because it is only up for 10 days, it features the best of new British design. For anyone looking for a great gift for a design-freak friend, or just a good piece for the apartment; this is the place for the next few days. … Read the full story on TreeHugger
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