Tag Archives: star news

Lena Denisova Would Make A Great Super Naughty Mail-Order Bride

So I was doing my daily Instagram creeping research earlier when I stumbled across another Russian hottie I think would make a great mail-order bride. And since I’m too poor to afford her myself (well, unless I can find a buyer for my collection of mint Burger King coupons…), I figured I might as well share her with you guys too. So meet  Lena Denisova . If anyone wants to go in on this with me, maybe we can figure out a timeshare or something. A video posted by Lena Denisova (@lena_denisova) on Oct 19, 2016 at 2:17am PDT

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Lena Denisova Would Make A Great Super Naughty Mail-Order Bride

Lily Aldridge Picture Moment

           

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Lily Aldridge Picture Moment

Kendall Jenner’s Love Magazine Xmas Video Only Has 210K Views

So, you know how we’re all supposed to pretend that Kendall Jenner is a huge A-list supermodel, and not just another rich kid with loaded parents? Well, she’s such a big “star” (AKA I bet her parents gave them a suitcase full of 20s) that Kendall managed to score herself  a second LOVE Advent video . And it’s the big one, too: their official Christmas Day video. Only I just checked the views, and after 2 days and counting, they’re not even close to 250K yet. Meanwhile, a random video of some dude unboxing a smartphone already has almost 3 million. So much for Kendall’s star power, huh? Maybe they should’ve given Day 25 to that guy instead.

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Kendall Jenner’s Love Magazine Xmas Video Only Has 210K Views

Anastasia Sorokina Would Make A Great Super Naughty Mail-Order Bride

In case you guys didn’t get everything you wanted for Christmas, don’t worry, me and the Little Tuna didn’t either. Not a single one of my Twitter girlfriends sent me any NSFW selfie Christmas cards, and I’m still waiting on those marriage proposals. So screw it, I figured I’d get us all something we could actually use: pictures of a super-hot Russian Instagram model named  Anastasia Sorokina . It’s just what you always wanted, right? Yeah, me too. You’re welcome. » view all 11 photos

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Anastasia Sorokina Would Make A Great Super Naughty Mail-Order Bride

Sahara Ray Will Blow Your Pants Off

I’ve been trying to tell you guys about  Sahara Ray for a months now, but just in case you missed the Aussie hottie the last few times I’ve done a post on her, you’re going to want to make sure you’re paying attention this time. Because trust me, you’re not going to want to miss this photoshoot. It’s got two of my favorite things in the entire world: some seriously amazing sideboob and… Sorry, I got so distracted I totally forgot the other one. Oh well. Enjoy. » view all 21 photos

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Sahara Ray Will Blow Your Pants Off

Love Magazine Sucks And Ruins A Hottie Like Joan Smalls

Love Magazine officially sucks. You get a hot supermodel like Joan Smalls and you make a video like this? What kind of pretentious bullshit is this? I’m surprised Joan allowed this to be released. Epic fail.

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Love Magazine Sucks And Ruins A Hottie Like Joan Smalls

Anya Sugar Would Make A Great Super Naughty Mail-Order Bride

I know you guys probably think I’m a “loser” because I still live in my mom’s basement, but I don’t think you understand that it’s all part of a master plan to save up as much money as I can. See, I’m building towards a major investment, and no, I’m not talking about a car or a house. I’ve got my eye on something way better: a super-hot mail-order bride. And after checking out her Instagram , I think Anya Sugar here would be perfect. But since I’m pretty sure she doesn’t accepted expired Burger King coupons as payment, I’d better keep saving if I want to become her new sugar daddy. Wish us luck!

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Anya Sugar Would Make A Great Super Naughty Mail-Order Bride

Victoria Justice Needs A Little Bella Thorne Action

Don’t get me wrong, I love Victoria Justice as much as the next pervert on the Internet. Maybe even more. But with all the Insta-hotties out there, and even more signing up to post sexy selfies every day, Victoria’s not going to stay one of my top 10 hotties for long if she keeps giving us nothing but boring photoshoots like this. If you ask me, she needs to take a page from Bella Thorne , both in the Snapchat selfie department and the potentially fake funbag department . I’m just looking out for what’s best for Victoria here. And for what’s best for the Little Tuna. It’s the same thing, really.

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Victoria Justice Needs A Little Bella Thorne Action

Victoria Justice Needs A Little Bella Thorne Action

Don’t get me wrong, I love Victoria Justice as much as the next pervert on the Internet. Maybe even more. But with all the Insta-hotties out there, and even more signing up to post sexy selfies every day, Victoria’s not going to stay one of my top 10 hotties for long if she keeps giving us nothing but boring photoshoots like this. If you ask me, she needs to take a page from Bella Thorne , both in the Snapchat selfie department and the potentially fake funbag department . I’m just looking out for what’s best for Victoria here. And for what’s best for the Little Tuna. It’s the same thing, really.

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Victoria Justice Needs A Little Bella Thorne Action

Shanina Shaik Topless At The Beach

I can’t remember the last time I did a post on  Shanina Shaik , and that’s practically criminal. She’s so hot, we should be getting regular updates every time Shanina goes to the beach. So here’s a little something to help make up for lost time: a massive bikini photoshoot from the Aussie supermodel. I figure this should easily last me another few months. OK, fine, another 30-45 seconds, at least. Either way, you’re welcome. » view all 75 photos

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Shanina Shaik Topless At The Beach