Earlier this year, Jada Pinkett Smith used her platform and influence and her streaming show to defend Jordyn Woods against being blacklisted. Now, she's using Red Table Talk to speak, alongside her mother and her famous daughter, about pornography. This is a personal subject for her, because Jada reveals that she was addicted to porn. On the latest episode of the Facebook original series, Red Table Talk , the subject was porn. Jada Pinkett Smith, her daughter Willow, and her mother, Adrienne, sat down to discuss this sensitive subject. “When is it okay?” Adrienne asks early in the episode. “And when is it destructive?” The real answer to that, of course, is that the same rule for porn applies to most things. If you're doing anything too much — from drinking alcohol to exercising to sleeping — then it's a problem in your life. But if it's not interfering with your life, then it's probably not a problem. As Jada reveals, it became a problem in her life. Jada admits to having had “an unhealthy relationship to porn” at a time in her life before she was with Will. At he time, she explains, she “was trying to practice abstinence.” “It was actually, like, filling, like, an emptiness,” Jada says after Willow suggests as much. “At least you think it is,” she adds. “But it's actually not.” Jada read about “some of the effects of pornography, like the idea that it gives you false expectations as far as sexual interactions.” “I can definitely see that with men,” Jada acknowledged. “How a woman should always be willing and ready,” she notes. “She should be ready to have sex however he wants, in any position, anywhere.” “And,” she says, men can begin to get the impression that “you should enjoy it no matter what.” “And it shouldn't just be joy, but it should be exhilaration,” Jada observes. “In pornography you’re never tired,” she notes. Jada adds: “There's never a 'no.'” “So I can definitely see how that can create an unrealistic expectation,” she expresses. Adrienne chimes in, noting that pornography has actually been “beneficial” to her overall well being. “I grew up in a household that just created a lot of shame,” she laments. “Which is so interesting because it wasn't like that with [Jada],” she notes. “But it definitely was like that for me.” “There's something about it that was freeing,” Jada says, of getting to experience porn and develop a healthier relationship with sex and sexuality. They also very correctly observe that the entire porn industry, at present, caters almost exclusively to men. “I don’t really think we know culturally what women like in regards to sex,” Jada speculates. She says that this is because “because women have not been allowed to explore in the same way as men.” “We’re just getting to the point where we’re even giving ourselves the opportunity to explore,” Jada observes. “So,” she reasons. “We need years of that before we even know.” Willow notes that there is stigma attached to being a woman who views porn. “That structure that will label a woman as a slut and a ho when she expresses her sexuality and finds joy in sexual pleasure,” she remarks. Willow continues: “That's the same structure that is upholding this porn industry.” The episode actually opens with a very entertaining anecdote for those of us who frequent social media. Jada reflects upon seeing some of what was on Tumblr when Willow was just 11 years old. Tumblr is a social media site noted for the formation of communities and the sharing of art. Jada recalls seeing gifs of what she describes as “hardcore” pornography, though Willow says that they were more artistic. There's a lengthy conversation to be had about that, but Tumblr did have a reputation as a haven for artistic porn gifs created by and for women. That was the case in 2012, when Willow was 11, but in December of 2017, Verizon-owned Tumblr banned all porn and lost 30% of its user base. “Because I had you and [Will Smith] to actually have real conversations with, that stuff didn't really affect me,” Willow assures her mother. It's good to have context, but we should note that Tumblr is not intended for anyone younger than a teenager. Additionally, even when porn was permitted, minors should not have been following 18+ blogs. Willow did make it clear that Tumblr isn't the only place that exposed her to porn. “I have two brothers,” Willow notes. “So I have seen some stuff.” She's obviously not saying that anyone deliberately pointed in the direction of porn. But anyone can momentarily forget what was last playing on their phone, tablet, or computer before a family member picks it up. This is especially true in open, supportive families like the Smiths where people aren't living in constant fear of judgment. This was a very healthy and calm discussion of an all-too-sensitive topic. Once again, hats off to the Smiths.
Original post:
Jada Pinkett Smith Admits to Pornography Addiction
