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Win a Chance to Tell Sarah Jessica Parker Where to Shove SATC 2

Nothing personal against Sarah Jessica Parker, seriously, but someone has to be held responsible for the harrowing, encroaching reality of Sex and the City 2 . If she’d just walk away from the property — its by-the-numbers grotesqueries and unwatchable desert caravans — it would all end, and the civilized world could return to swatting away bloated comic-book flicks and video-game adaptations. If you happen to agree and want the opportunity to personally bring SJP to the light, then does Warner Bros. ever have the contest for you.

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Win a Chance to Tell Sarah Jessica Parker Where to Shove SATC 2

Traveling Carnival Lawsuit Hits Heroes

There’s nothing like a $50 million lawsuit to worsen your cancellation woes. Just days after Heroes was axed , graphic novelist Jazan Wild filed a lawsuit against NBC Universal for allegedly basing a Heroes story arc on his Carnival of Souls digital book series. According to Wild, the show’s fourth season violated his copyright by introducing settings, storylines and a carney character virtually identical to those found in his successful three-installment collection. [ EW ]

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Traveling Carnival Lawsuit Hits Heroes

At Cannes: Mick Jagger Talks Weed, Promotes Stones in Exile

If an award were to be given at Cannes for the audience’s favorite film, it just might go to director Stephen Kijak’s Stones in Exile, which premiered here at Director’s Fortnight. It didn’t hurt that Mick Jagger himself dropped in to revisit those hazy days of nearly 40 years past.

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At Cannes: Mick Jagger Talks Weed, Promotes Stones in Exile

Miranda July Returns to Movies

About time! According to Anne Thompson , director/artist Miranda July has finally completed her second film (after winning the Camera d’Or for her first, Me and You and Everyone We Know ). It’s a relationship comedy costarring Hamish Linklater called The Future , and it’s about a self-obsessed couple who can’t stop Googling their own names. In honor of July’s last effort, let’s start pooping back and forth in anticipation. [ Thompson on Hollywood ]

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Miranda July Returns to Movies

Everyone But Carlos the Jackal Seems to Love the Carlos the Jackal Movie

Pity poor Carlos the Jackal. More than a decade after a nearly 25-year reign of terror as arguably the world’s foremost terrorist and assassin, the incarcerated criminal is frustrated today by a sprawling, 321-minute biopic about him currently earning raves at Cannes. And he’s taking to the airwaves to let everybody know about it.

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Everyone But Carlos the Jackal Seems to Love the Carlos the Jackal Movie

Breaking Dawn Stars Get Their Payday

Kellan Lutz and some of the lesser Twilight actors have been holding out for a bigger paycheck to do the two-film finale Breaking Dawn , and now, Deadline reports , they’ve gotten (most of) it. Thank goodness — if they’d had to recast even more roles after already replacing Rachelle Lefevre for Eclipse , this whole saga would have felt like Todd Solondz was directing it or something (and Breaking Dawn’s werewolf-vampbaby love story is already icky enough). [ Deadline ]

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Breaking Dawn Stars Get Their Payday

Eliot Spitzer Doc, Mike Leigh’s Latest Acquired as Fest Buys Pick Up

I don’t know what it means that Tribeca and Cannes are running about even on their 2010 festival acquisitions to date, but there you have it: Alex Gibney’s terrific Untitled Eliot Spitzer Doc and Mike Leigh’s Palme d’Or front-runner Another Year are both spoken for, according to announcements this afternoon.

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Eliot Spitzer Doc, Mike Leigh’s Latest Acquired as Fest Buys Pick Up

Bieber to Valentine’s Day Sequel?

Garry Marshall has previously threatened not just to make New Year’s Eve , a semi-sequel to the DEFCON romcom Valentine’s Day , but to bring back a few choice cast members. Now, though, he’d junk them all for just one teen troubadour. “Already, they’re mentioning Justin Bieber. I have no idea who that is, but I’m sure we’ll meet,” Marshall told MTV. “It’s supposed to be a similar cast of a number of stars. It’s written like that, but we hope to get all new stars except for Hector Elizondo, who has to be in all my movies.” [ MTV ]

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Bieber to Valentine’s Day Sequel?

‘You’re a Moron’: Nicolas Chartier Isn’t Done With His E-Bashing Crusade

If you’re going to get barred from accepting your Best Picture Oscar at the Academy Awards, then you’d better get your money’s worth. That’s the predicament facing Nicolas Chartier, the intrepid producer and e-mail wack job who has followed his ill-advised awards-season attacks on Avatar with a little better-advised (but still insane) on a defender of Hurt Locker pirates. Read on for the e-evidence.

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‘You’re a Moron’: Nicolas Chartier Isn’t Done With His E-Bashing Crusade

Chloe Sevigny’s Drag Confession: She Loves Birthdays