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‘Zero Dark Thirty As Best Picture?’ Movieline’s What The What?! Oscar Picks

“ Argo   to win it all.” This has been the Oscar pundit thesis statement ever since Ben Affleck was left off the Best Director list and promptly blew over the Critics’ Choice and Golden Globe Awards in a whirlwind weekend of Oscar analysis. Every award Argo has gathered since that weekend last month has added to the confirmation bias. Affleck and his film established themselves as the storyline of the 2012 Academy Awards. But what about the several months leading up to the nominations? Remember when Les Miserables    jumped ahead with a rapturous New York premiere? Remember when The Master exploded into the race with a series of secret screenings set up by Paul Thomas Anderson himself? Remember when Lincoln was predestined to win Best Picture, because War Horse lost last year? The storyline of 2012 isn’t Argo ; it’s confusion. And in keeping with that storyline, Movieline presents the “What The What?!” Oscars, a list of out-there-but-plausible winners in the hopes for a less predictable and more exciting show. All of my picks below go against the Argo storyline, as if it wasn’t coming at all. Just like in the film, Argo was a red herring all along. If all goes according to confusion, here’s what could happen: BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS “What The What?!” pick: Jacki Weaver , Silver Linings Playbook Based on previous ceremonies, this is potentially the first award of the night, and what better way to start off the night than ruining everyone’s ballots? An Anne Hathaway  win has been too obvious, and when something is too obvious, voters tend to look for a way out. The same rule has been slowly killing Lincoln all season, which doesn’t play into Sally Field’s favor. The next choice would be Amy Adams  in The Master , but here’s where we’ve got the Weinstein factor: somewhere in the season, Harvey looked at his prospects and picked the easy Silver Linings Playbook over the bold Master . Jacki Weaver’s nomination was baffling to begin with, and that same campaign leads to a win. BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR “What The What?!” pick: Philip Seymour Hoffman , The Master This category has been swirling around the dependably exceptional Hoffman all season.  Christoph Waltz is picking up some late backlash with people commenting that what he does in Django is identical to what he won for in Inglourious Basterds . Tommy Lee Jones didn’t win a lot of support with a grouchy turn at the Golden Globes, not enough Academy voters bought Robert De Niro’s Katie Couric cry-fest, and Alan Arkin’s performance is not all that different from his turn in Little Miss Sunshine . Hoffman’s steadiness wins the day. BEST ACTRESS “What The What?!” pick: Naomi Watts , The Impossible Just like Jennifer Lawrence and Jessica Chastain, Watts is on her second Academy Award nomination. Lawrence has a natural cockiness that charms the Internet crowd, but fmakes her a difficult Oscar campaigner. Chastain was similar to Jeremy Renner in The Hurt Locker , delivering a revelatory, powerhouse performance that’s overshadowed by the film itself (I’m curious if Bigelow will ever direct someone to an Oscar). The storyline behind Emmanuelle Riva is that she’ll turn 86 on Oscar Sunday, but old and accomplished does not guarantee anyone an Oscar. (Six years ago, they overlooked freaking Peter O’Toole, so there’s the love shown for the emeritus crowd.). Watts is someone current, who the voters seem to love, and wins based on a familiar role in a tear-jerker film. BEST ACTOR “What The What?!” pick: Joaquin Phoenix , The Master A hypothetic discussion between prognosticators: “But Daniel Day-Lewis had it in the bag!” “If Jamie Foxx can win for Ray and Philip Seymour Hoffman for Capote , then DDL only makes sense!” “The Oscars love imitations.” “But it was just an imitation.” “No one really knows what Lincoln moved or sounded like.” “They didn’t want a history lesson.” “Phoenix also moved and spoke in a distinct style. Painfully.” “It looked like it hurt, moving all hunched over. He looked like he starved himself.” “The Oscars love pretty people breaking themselves down.” “This must be like Charlize Theron winning for Monster .” “But Phoenix trashed the Oscars.” “No more so than anyone else has in the past. And he hopped back on the trail at Harvey’s encouragement.” “Phoenix must’ve been destined for this. If Harvey has his back.” “I knew it was Phoenix all along!” “I said it first!” BEST DIRECTOR “What The What?!” pick: Michael Haneke , Amour Amour ’s glut of nominations showed there was serious affection for Haneke’s Palme d’Or winner, and it was clearly through the labor of Haneke himself. The Academy has a track record of not awarding prestige directors like Haneke or Malick or Hitchcock or Kubrick, but this is the year for weirdness. The most surprising choice would be Tarantino, but his Django stumping has sparked uncomfortable conversations, which leads to thought-provoking essays but not Oscars. (Plus, in this “What The What?” ceremony, he wins another Original Screenplay award). Spielberg, despite all the industry love, will be the poster child for Lincoln ’s struggles as the obvious choice. A Haneke win is the result of voters not knowing who to fall behind, so why not go with the smart Austrian? BEST PICTURE “What The What?!” pick: Zero Dark Thirty When the prognosticators decided  Argo was in, everything else was out. ZDT riled up too much controversy and was done, because they had Argo, which was Diet ZDT . Well guess what: Out of left field comes ZDT for the win. It’s an amalgam of other nominees: it’s got the historical gravitas of Lincoln without the drag; it’s got the the true life thriller ending of Argo without the embellishment; it’s got the fire of Django Unchained without the mess; it stars a face of Young Hollywood who isn’t the too-cocky but too-familiar Jennifer Lawrence. It’s a massive critic success and has been victorious at the box office. A Zero Dark Thirty win would confuse everyone down to Kathryn Bigelow herself, but this has been a season of confusion, not surprises. Plenty of other things could happen to destroy Oscar ballots. Searching for Sugarman could lose Best Documentary; ParaNorman could win Best Animated Feature; Amour could lose Best Foreign Film if Haneke wins Best Director, like the latter is a consolation prize. Even if Argo wins the final prize on Sunday, it will still prove to be a bizarre year. Affleck was not nominated for Best Director, but somehow, an also-ran director became the discussion. The 2012 Oscar race has been strange, and here’s hoping Sunday is strange, too. John Hendel is a playwright from Los Angeles. Follow John Hendel on  Twitter. Follow Movieline on  Twitter.   

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‘Zero Dark Thirty As Best Picture?’ Movieline’s What The What?! Oscar Picks

Oscars 2013 − Movieline Liveblogs The Oscars

The weeks of punditry and teary talk-show performances are over!  Seth MacFarlane is about to take the stage and Movieline  is about to liveblog the Oscars. Grab your favorite cocktail, enable your hand-held device and join me for Hollywood’s most holy night. Let the pageantry and snarky comments begin!

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Oscars 2013 − Movieline Liveblogs The Oscars

Oscars 2013: What To Expect From Seth MacFarlane

‘Family Guy’ creator will bring music, cameos and cutaways to the 85th Academy Awards. By Josh Wigler Seth MacFarlane Photo: Kevin Winter/ Getty Images

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Oscars 2013: What To Expect From Seth MacFarlane

2013 Academy Awards: Who Will Win?

Happy Academy Awards day, movie fans! With the 2013 Oscars airing tonight on ABC – and viewers anxious to either praise or tear apart host Seth MacFarlane – THG is here with our annual bold predictions for the ceremony. Who WILL win? Who SHOULD win? Read our take below and sound off with your own… BEST PICTURE Will Win: Argo . Should Win: Silver Linings Playbook . Many consider it too simple of a movie to win, but the performances are incredible and it’s simply entertainment at its finest. BEST DIRECTOR Will win: Steven Spielberg, Lincoln . Should win: Ang Lee, Life of Pi . Have you read that book? It’s uncanny this was turned into a coherent, enjoyable film. BEST ACTOR Will win: Daniel Day-Lewis, Lincoln . Should win: Daniel Day-Lewis, Lincoln . The clear favorite for a very good reason. BEST ACTRESS Will win: Jessica Chastain, Zero Dark Thirty . Should win: Naomi Watts, The Impossible . A memorable performance in a truly harrowing tale, which is based on a very real, scary story. BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR Will win: Robert De Niro, Silver Linings Playbook . Should win: Christoph Waltz, Django Unchained . Come on. Who doesn’t adore this guy?!? BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS Will win: Anne Hathaway, Les Misérables . Should win: Helen Hunt, The Sessions . Yes, Hathaway sang on song, really, really well. But give us Hunt’s more featured, layered performance in what we hope will be the evening’s biggest upset.

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2013 Academy Awards: Who Will Win?

Oscar Index: Anne Hathaway Is A Sure Bet For Sunday, But Jennifer Lawrence Shouldn’t Get Cocky

The Oscar season enters its last weekend, but one suspects it is far from over. Even if Academy members ultimately hewed to tradition and voted Lincoln and Steven Spielberg  Best Picture and Director, respectively — as is the customary coronation for films with the most Oscar nominations — this outlier season will be studied and debated. For at least days to come. The Final Countdown To The 2013 Academy Awards The final week of voting saw pundits and bloggers get in their final shots, filibuster like Jefferson Smith for their lost causes (“the only causes worth fighting for”), issue their final predictions or revise earlier forecasts. Roger Ebert backtracked slightly from his self-described “cocky” “Outguess Ebert” boast that he had guessed every (contest category) correctly. “Every year it is the same,” Ebert wrote. “I came out of the gate filled with certainty, and as the deadline draws near I begin to falter.” Several enterprising writers persuaded some Academy members from various branches to share—anonymously—their Oscar ballots, and the results might give pause to anyone convinced that any of the major categories (except perhaps Best Actor and Best Supporting Actress) are locks. The Oscar Index views and duly notes these ruminations objectively. The reported (conjectured?) groundswells make for compelling Oscars storylines, last-minute cliffhanging drama and even, perhaps, better ratings for the telecast. The Index admits to a conservative risk tolerance here, but on Monday morning will probably say it knew De Niro would win Best Supporting Actor all along. Let’s look at how the Gold Linings playbook plays out on Oscars eve. Academy Award For Best Picture In Oscar season, as in war, the first casualty is truth. Three of the Best Picture nominees, frontrunners at various stages of Oscar season, took Battleship -like hits for remaking history. Critics of  Zero Dark Thirty , said it was pro-torture — oh, for the days of the Orwellian Bush era and “enhanced interrogation techniques” — and heightened its role in the killing of Osama Bin Laden. Lincoln slandered the state of Connecticut by depicting its representatives as voting against the 13 th Amendment. And to read The New York Times ’ Maureen Dowd and Salon ’s Andrew O’Hehir  this week, about the only things Argo   got absolutely right was that there is a country named Iran and a CIA operative named Tony Mendez. I’m bracing myself for the eleventh-hour revelation that Quvenzhane Wallis is actually a 32-year-old psychopathic Russian dwarf pretending to be a child. Which opens the door for Silver Linings Playbook . Reconsiders Ebert: “( Argo ) was also my choice of the year’s best movie. Now, more and more, from many different quarters, I hear affection for Silver Linings Playbook . People tell me, I have a brother-in-law exactly like that. I sense a groundswell.” But just as those Iranian guards discovered as they chased the hostage-carrying plane down the runway (yes, I know; didn’t happen) there should be no stopping Argo ’s awards season take-off, lifted by wins from such major Oscar precursors as the PGA, DGA, SAG, BAFTA and, most recently, WGA (you know; the guild supposedly more terrifying than the Ayatollah). For awards bloggers, this Best Picture race has been all kinds of personal. Lincoln champion Sasha Stone at Awards Daily concedes the race to Argo , but will have none of it, diss-missing director Ben Affleck as “a movie star director…(who) finally made a movie people liked” and bemoaning the injustice suffered by “a film that good, that well intentioned.” Hollywood Elsewhere’s Jeffrey Wells, too, picks Argo to win, but not before raging against the machine for the film he believes should win: “ Zero Dark Thirty , Zero Dark Thirty , Zero Dark Thirty , and I don’t care…going down with the ship.” The more journalistic pundits at Gold Derby and Gurus o’ Gold mostly favor Argo to win, but Anne Thompson sees echoes of last year’s race between The King’s Speech and The Social Network : “On the one hand, there’s recognition of what the older Academy goes for: quality, heart, period seriousness. On the other is a more youthful, ardent and in its way, au courant popular favorite. This year, both contenders are resonant and timely, but one seems more establishment while the other is the hip up-and-comer.” And the Academy, she notes, is more establishment than the guild members who honored Argo . As for the Academy members who shared their ballots with the media, they’re all over the map. Of the five ballots shared with Entertainment Weekly , Argo was the pick of the Executive and the Actor. The Director went with Silver Linings Playbook , the Actress,  Life of Pi, and the Writer,  Beasts of the Southern Wild . A Director sharing his ballot with The Hollywood Reporter went with Zero Dark Thirty. Apropos of nothing, the Oscar Index remembers vividly being in thrall to Argo . When it was over, I leaned over to Mrs. Index and said, perhaps facetiously, “Best Picture.”  Like Lincoln , it celebrated America at its best. But it also celebrated Hollywood at its best. It was not a valentine to the movies like The Artist ; it was more of a “We love this country, too,” pat on the back. But with all the potshots that Lincoln  has taken over the last few months, it should be noted that the film truly did make history. After seeing the film, inquisitive Mississippi moviegoer Dr. Ranjan Batra discovered upon further research that the state had yet to technically ratify the 13th Amendment. He got the ball rolling and on Feb. 7, the state’s ratification became official. So Lincoln ’s got that going for it. 2013 Oscar Nominations For Best Director Here’s one of the categories in which we are fending off a little Index remorse. Steven Spielberg edges out Ang Lee , according to pundits Gold Derby and Gurus o’ Gold. With Affleck out of the running, this might be the category in which Academy voters choose to acknowledge Spielberg’s achievement. But The Wrap’s Steve Pond posits: “…as much as voters admire and respect ( Lincoln ), they don’t seem to love it, and as a result I think he is going to lose. The huge Actors Branch could sway things in favor of David O. Russell , whose film has been coming on strong in a typical Harvey Weinstein-engineered surge. But I suspect that the rest of the Academy will lean toward the spectacle of Life of Pi , and give Ang Lee his second Best Director award without a corresponding Best Picture win.” What do those shared Oscar ballots in EW reveal? The Director went with Russell (“the heart of the job remains performances”), but the Actress, Writer and the Executive went with Lee. The Actor voted for Spielberg. Academy Award Nominees For Best Actor Raymond Massey couldn’t do it. Henry Fonda couldn’t do it. Rex Hamilton couldn’t do it (that’s for any Police Squad watchers out there). Daniel Day-Lewis will be the first actor to win the Academy Award for portraying Abraham Lincoln. Oh, and he’s poised to become the first three-time Best Actor Oscar-winner. On this, Oscar-watchers are near unanimous. He was also the pick of four of the five members who shared their ballots with EW. The Actress went with Bradley Cooper . If she’s available and she ever runs into Cooper, it will make a nice icebreaker. Oscar Nominations 2013: The Best Actress Contenders This is another category that seems to be in last-minute flux. Jennifer Lawrence has retained her frontrunner status among pundits, but several are noting the intangibles attached to 85 year-old Emmanuelle Riva, not the least of which is the “too soon” factor. In other words, Lawrence and Chastain will be back and this is Riva’s first, and presumably last, bid for an Academy Award. Then again, three of those five EW ballots went with Naomi Watts in The Impossible . Could enough votes divided among the top three contenders make that possible? 2013 Academy Awards: Best Supporting Actor Nominees Former frontrunner Tommy Lee Jones has endeared himself to no one this Oscar season and stayed off the campaign trail. On the one hand, you’ve got to grudgingly respect that. On the other, he might get the Golden Globe glums again watching Robert De Niro pick up his first Academy Award since Raging Bull .  De Niro can be as taciturn and intimidating as Jones, but he gamely put himself out there this season and revealed an emotional side that swings votes. Now that is acting, dear readers. Twelve vs. nine of Gold Derby’s experts are now on Team De Niro. The Gurus o’ Goldsters also now rank De Niro as the frontrunner, dropping Jones to No. 2.  Two out of three of In Contention’s experts are also in De Niro’s camp. If De Niro does win, he owes it to Katie Couric to acknowledge her in his acceptance speech. But there is one Silver lining — for TLJ: Nate Silver , the breakout prognosticator in the last presidential campaign, predicts Jones (and Spielberg) will win. There has, too, been some late-breaking buzz for Christoph Waltz. That Director who shared his Oscar ballot with the Hollywood Reporter admitted that he did not vote for Jennifer Lawrence because he was offended by her Saturday Night Live monologue (on principle alone, can his privileges be revoked?). I wonder what he thought of Waltz on “SNL” as “Djesus Uncrossed”? Oscar Nominations 2013: Best Supporting Actress Nominees This Oscar has a first name; and it’s Anne. LAST WEEK IN THE 2013 OSCAR INDEX: OSCAR INDEX: Will Academy ‘Amour’ For Emmanuelle Riva Lead To Best Actress Upset? More 2013 Oscar Nominations: Academy Award Nominees Announced – ‘Lincoln’ Leads 2013 Oscar Noms Oscar Nominations 2013 — The Biggest Snubs & Surprises Of The Year 2013 Oscar Predictions By The Numbers: Which Nominees Are Hot (Jennifer Lawrence) & Not Follow Movieline on  Twitter .

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Oscar Index: Anne Hathaway Is A Sure Bet For Sunday, But Jennifer Lawrence Shouldn’t Get Cocky

Your Winners for Peeper’s Choice [PICS]

Mr. Skin made some tough decisions at the 14th Annual Anatomy Awards , and also gave power to the peepers with a chance to vote in the top seven categories. From thirty-five of the absolute hottest nude scenes of the year, voters choose the best of the breast for a special Peepers’ Choice Award . Skinsational! Pics after the jump!

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Your Winners for Peeper’s Choice [PICS]

From Kurtis Blow To Lil Wayne: The NBA’s Complicated History With Hip-Hop

Hip-hop has become synonymous with the NBA, but the relationship between the two remains complicated. By James Montgomery Lil Wayne Photo: Gustavo Caballero/ Getty Images

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From Kurtis Blow To Lil Wayne: The NBA’s Complicated History With Hip-Hop

Is Taylor Swift’s New Musical Bestie Tom Odell?

Swift partied backstage at the Brit Awards with singer/songwriter. By Jocelyn Vena Taylor Swift and Tom Odell Photo: Getty Images

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Is Taylor Swift’s New Musical Bestie Tom Odell?

WATCH: James Franco Makes Flaming Lips’ Wayne Coyne In ‘Oz The Great & Powerful’ Bubble Clip

Yes, this clip of Glinda The Good Witch ( Michelle Williams ) and a pre-wizard Oz ( James Franco ) traveling to the Emerald City by bubble in the Sam Raimi -directed  Oz the Great and Powerful is pretty phantasmagorical, but let’s give credit where credit is due:  Do you, um, realize that Flaming Lips’ frontman Wayne Coyne has been traveling by bubble since at least 2006 — and he don’t need no stinkin’ computer-generated assistance. For those with short memories (and those who were ‘shrooming at Lollapalooza in 2006 when the Lips took the stage), here are a couple of video clips that will enable avid fans of traveling by bubble to analyze and compare and contrast the stumble-step techniques of Franco and Coyne as they each take a spin. After watching both, I’m sure you will agree with me that all of the R&D money that went into the Segway should have been invested in bubble travel. Follow Frank DiGiacomo on Twitter . Follow Movieline on Twitter .

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WATCH: James Franco Makes Flaming Lips’ Wayne Coyne In ‘Oz The Great & Powerful’ Bubble Clip

One Direction Zap 2013 Brit Awards With ‘One Way’

The guys jump onstage to share their new charity single Wednesday. By Emilee Lindner One Direction’s Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson perform at the 2013 Brit Awards Photo: Matt Kent/ Getty Images

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One Direction Zap 2013 Brit Awards With ‘One Way’