Tag Archives: balls

Marshawn Lynch at Super Bowl Media Day: I’m Just Here So I Don’t Get Fined

Considering the way Tom Brady’s balls  have dominated the news cycle for the past week, you may have forgotten that there’s a football game to be played on Sunday.  #DeflateGate has served as evidence of just how weird our nation’s press coverage can get (particularly when you throw the Internet  into the mix).  Marshawn Lynch’s begrudging appearance at Super Bowl media day today served as yet another reminder that pro athletes and sports reporters are locked in a dead-heat to see who can be the most ridiculous. If you’re not familiar with Lynch, he’s a beast of a running back, but kind of a jackass as a human being. His history of bad behavior dates back to when Lynch ran a woman over and fled the scene during his time with the Buffalo Bills. Five years later, Lynch’s behavior is much less harmful, but no less idiotic. Already in hot water with the NFL for his refusal to speak to the media and his fondness for making “obscene gestures” on the field, Lynch was reportedly threatened with $500,000 fine if he didn’t show up to today’s press event. So he showed up. And proceeded to give the exact same answer 25 times: Marshawn Lynch: “I’m Just Here So I Won’t Get Fined” “I’m just here so I don’t get fined,” Lynch warned the reporters on hand. “So y’all can sit here and ask me all the questions y’all want to. I’m gonna answer with the same answer.” He wasn’t kidding. Beast Mode proceeded to say, “I’m here so I won’t get fined,” in response to every single question. Some members of the press expressed their frustration on Twitter, but really – weren’t they kinda playing ball by continuing to ask him questions? Say what you will about Lynch, if it weren’t for him, we wouldn’t have this nugget of YouTube gold: Marshawn Lynch: Hold My D! Sadly, he won’t be remembered as the source of the most epic Super Bowl XLIX quotes. Take it away, Tom: Tom Brady Defends Use of Balls 1. Don’t rub my balls! Leave that to me, please.

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Marshawn Lynch at Super Bowl Media Day: I’m Just Here So I Don’t Get Fined

MyPakage Does a Dirty Christmas of the Day

My friends at MYPAKAGE , who make the world’s best fitting underwear in the history of underwear, for those of us who like things that fit, while I prefer wearing extra small underwear to keep my sperm count down, my balls in atrophy, all so that I can’t really get the hookers I pay extra to come inside by telling them I am a virgin But enough about me, here’s a silly christmas video that you’ll laugh at because you like your jokes like you like your women…spread assed and cute enough to stick it in….about Not fitting..and apparently…not fitting is inappropriate when taken out of context…funny….now get some MYPAKAGE ,

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MyPakage Does a Dirty Christmas of the Day

Selena Gomez Dance Off of the Day

Selena Gomez is dancing in a bra top, in her car, showing off her fake tits because that’s why she got them, even if they are smaller than most fake tits, they still have the same impact and effect on a girl who get’s them mind…. I have been with countless fake tit girls and all loved showing them off, letting you touch, or staging dance-offs as the new challenge to take the internet by storm…turning the entire world into one horrible high school class…filled with the famous, overly positive cheerleaders…and luckily ample autistic school shooters…. TO SEE PICS OF HER HIDING HER FACE BECAUSE SHE’S DRAMAIC CLICK HERE

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Selena Gomez Dance Off of the Day

Hailey Clauson for Vogue Spain of the Day

I’ve heard that Hailey Clauson is some fat hipster wannabe Kate Upton…that in person she’s some kind of monster, all big and scary, looking like she’s out to eat her way out of everything….but I don’t really see it…. I just see tits on a girl who had the balls to sue Urban Outfitters when she was 17 for sexualizing her, in some strategic publicity stunt that I guess worked, even though if I was a brand, I’d never hire her…she’s a liability. She’s booked Vogue Spain, making moves and I guess a legit model…and I don’t really care because she’s not naked like she’s supposed to be…and when they aren’t naked…they don’t matter.

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Hailey Clauson for Vogue Spain of the Day

Josephine Skriver Topless for Allure Russia of the Day

Danish model JOSEPHINE SKRIVER , daughter of a lesbian and a gay marine biologist proves that the European gays can instill the right morals and values in the children they raise, despite what the Christians think, leading to a babe dialled into “artistic” nudity… I mean she’s definitely hot enough to be a stripper, escort or even a pornstar, but her gay parents and their gay lovers, showed her that the real way to make money off her nudity is Fashion…because fashion is respectable…and if she shoots spread eagle vagina shots for Vogue, it is making a statement on the condition of a woman’s role in society, but when a girl does the same post for “Teen Gangbang Sluts From the Projects”….it’s making a statement of “damn that bitch need money for drugs and illegit babies”… Both fun to look at, one a little bit of a better life strategy…that I guess she learned from having two active parents that actually wanted kids, because in their world, accidents from sex usually lead to hospital visits not abortion clinics… ALl this to say, gay parents are better parents than single mothers in the projects/on welfare/etc.…and here are the pics to prove it.

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Josephine Skriver Topless for Allure Russia of the Day

Makeout Photographer of the Day

His name is JEDEDIAH JOHNSON …he is a photographer…and he applies lipstick before surprise making out and snapping pics of the aftermath of his subjects.. Now, I don’t know how his models or the people he ends up kissing don’t see it coming, I mean if I was having my picture taken by a dude applying lipstick, I would probably wonder if I was going to be leaving his “studio” alive…and when he started to approach me, camera in hand, licking his lips…I’d instinctively throat punch him, kick him the balls or run…but maybe girls, especially models, who have already decided to let a man direct them, have less fear…that’s how Terry ends up jerking off on all the girls he takes pics of. I am posting this, because I think the idea and the pics, are interesting as fuck. It’s like mouth rape, shock, real life “WTF”…and that to me makes it pretty fucking cool, innovative, even interesting as a social experiment and I don’t even have a lipstick fetish, so I can only imagine what this does to those of you who do…. I guess in posting this, anyone he takes pics of will know what they have coming for them, so it’s the end of the road for the Makeout Photographer…he’s gonna have to find a new thing to surprise people with…let’s hope it involves bush. Photography Makeout Photographer of the Day His name is JEDEDIAH JOHNSON …he is a photographer…and he applies lipstick before surprise making out and snapping pics of the aftermath of his subjects.. Now, I don’t know how his models or the people he ends up kissing don’t see it coming, I mean if I was having my picture taken by a dude applying lipstick, I would probably wonder if I was going to be leaving his “studio” alive…and when he started to approach me, camera in hand, licking his lips…I’d instinctively throat punch him, kick him the balls or run…but maybe girls, especially models, who have already decided to let a man direct them, have less fear…that’s how Terry ends up jerking off on all the girls he takes pics of. I am posting this, because I think the idea and the pics, are interesting as fuck. It’s like mouth rape, shock, real life “WTF”…and that to me makes it pretty fucking cool, innovative, even interesting as a social experiment and I don’t even have a lipstick fetish, so I can only imagine what this does to those of you who do…. I guess in posting this, anyone he takes pics of will know what they have coming for them, so it’s the end of the road for the Makeout Photographer…he’s gonna have to find a new thing to surprise people with…let’s hope it involves bush.

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Makeout Photographer of the Day

The Dov Charney Penis Dance Video of the Day

I think Dov Charney is the kind of executive more billion dollar brands need. I mean who the fuck needs clothes when your staff is a bunch of slutty 18 year old hipsters who think you’re fucking god…. This naked Dance video may be part of why he got fired, but I think it’s 100 percent why the guy is genius… I mean it takes balls to pull out your balls with girls you pay 30,000 dollars a year to…they could easily film you and exploit you for a lot of your money…or even get you fired from your own company… Either way, It’s awesome!

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The Dov Charney Penis Dance Video of the Day

Christina Milian’s Insta Bikini and Vape Sex Party of the Day

Christina Milian is a mom… I don’t know if this behavior is irresponsible for a mom or not. I had a mom early on in life, who was a hooker back in Mexico, and who I saw do some shit far worse than vaping, we’re talking shooting speed and getting railed by white men, one of whom was my dad, for drug money, not food, leading to me being taken by an orphanage where the priests abused me, while she was busy dying of AIDS or some other hooker on drug related illness… So a little vaping and getting her neck licked isn’t such a horrible thing…especially not when at a Vegas pool party, because that’s what happens at Vegas Pool parties.. I just don’t see how this helps her public image, or her brand, is this some rebellion that her life has become an assistant host on The Voice…instead of being a judge…is it that she never was a mom to her baby anyway, that shit just happened between writing hit Bieber songs with her husband at the time… I don’t know, it’s like Divorcee taking advantage of the weekend off, turned down for what, hustle that she probably should have left off instagram, but I like on Instagram because I can stare and judge from my couch.

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Christina Milian’s Insta Bikini and Vape Sex Party of the Day

Nicole Scherzinger Working it for the Paparazzi of the Day

For years, Nicole Scherzinger, has been called a tranny. I guess when she saw the paparazzi coming close, she felt it was the perfect opportunity to both remind everyone who Nicole Scherzinger is…I mean who gives a fuck about the Pussycat Dolls…but more importantly, to show us that she’s really good at tucking…she’s like “try to see the balls, I bet you can’t, because they are shoved deep inside a surgical pocket I had custom made for me when I was getting my tits and face done”…unless she is a woman…with a vagina…and this is just how she maintains her thick booty… Ultimately, you’d fuck her either way…and so would I…because why the fuck not…and more importantly, because it’s not gay if he’s in a bikini….and has a wig on…right? TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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Nicole Scherzinger Working it for the Paparazzi of the Day

Nicole Scherzinger Working it for the Paparazzi of the Day

For years, Nicole Scherzinger, has been called a tranny. I guess when she saw the paparazzi coming close, she felt it was the perfect opportunity to both remind everyone who Nicole Scherzinger is…I mean who gives a fuck about the Pussycat Dolls…but more importantly, to show us that she’s really good at tucking…she’s like “try to see the balls, I bet you can’t, because they are shoved deep inside a surgical pocket I had custom made for me when I was getting my tits and face done”…unless she is a woman…with a vagina…and this is just how she maintains her thick booty… Ultimately, you’d fuck her either way…and so would I…because why the fuck not…and more importantly, because it’s not gay if he’s in a bikini….and has a wig on…right? TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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Nicole Scherzinger Working it for the Paparazzi of the Day