Tag Archives: bikini girls

Old and Sloppy Jessica Alba Stomach in a Bikini of the Day

There comes a time (30) in every woman’s life where she turns 30…and it is all down hill from there…that’s probably why they all start having kids at that age, because even without the kids, they start to get sloppy, their stomachs start to bloat and expand, maybe to make them feel like they aren’t prime pussy anymore so that they breed, or to warm men that they aren’t prime pussy or that fertile anymore so the risk of knocking them up after unprotected sex after meeting them at an N Sync reunion concert are lower, but they’re probably the age where they’d flip the condom out and fuck themselves with the cum trying to get pregnant even if you were protected, not that anyone is protected, all in efforts to put the body to use before it implodes, or I guess explodes…from the screaming uterus…and hormones producing fat cells.. So, Alba, who is over 30, realizes this, and has the odds against her being all Mexican and shit, which if you know Mexicans, and I don’t because I am Mexican in Canada, but I went to a Mexican resort once, they all end up neckless and sloppy…and not just from eating too many corn tortillas…but because of that mean 30… What I am saying is this girl goes to the gym everyday all day, and still has a gut hanging over her bikini shorts, while on Vacation from her rough job of being on Vacation for a lie of a brand called HONEST she’s honorary CEO of, because it makes her feel smart and makes the brand people have something to promote with.. All this to say…old, sloppy, mom or not..I mean those stretch marked tits look like a fucking burn victim, but I still wonder if she ever takes it up the ass, cuz girl looks pregnant again. Jesus – I just took a closer look at her shattered tits…what the fuck.. To See More Pics CLICK HERE The post Old and Sloppy Jessica Alba Stomach in a Bikini of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Old and Sloppy Jessica Alba Stomach in a Bikini of the Day

Eliza Cummings Tits for Marie Claire Italy of the Day

Eliza Cummings is a 25 year old model who has never heard anyone make a cum reference to her name being cumming especially when you factor in how fucking good she looks, especially topless, like all models pretty are and should be, as that is their sacrifice to the world, their nipples, so that they don’t have to live a normal 9-5 life where they actually work, but rather get to focus on the important things in life like free hand outs, social climbing through sex, and finding rich guys to marry or get knocked up by, especially if they don’t start out rich. She’s with a Rothschild, a member of the richest families in the world…a family rumored to won the world’s gold supply, and the route of all the conspiracies…but she likes him for his kindness. Either way, here are her tits for David Bellemere, the hardest working man in the luxury, high end, tits photography… I am pretty sure these are old pics, recycled, but tits are still tits…so tits. The post Eliza Cummings Tits for Marie Claire Italy of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Eliza Cummings Tits for Marie Claire Italy of the Day

Lindsay Lohan Dubsmashes Herself of the Day

A video posted by Lindsay Lohan (@lindsaylohan) on Mar 17, 2016 at 10:04pm PDT This is just creepy as fuck. You know, a girl reverting back to her youth, for an App that probably pays her, in what you may think is funny or cute or clever, but that I know comes from a crazy place, where when she’s in her house, probably involves her reliving the glory days, making her friends read the other lines, as she does her Parent Trap breakout performance that was so promising for her future, but that she fucked up by self distructing… I’m still a fan, because I like crazy, unstable, spoiled girls…and there’s something poetic and terrifying about this…”it was all so simple back then”….depressive… Happy #St.Patrick'sDayReds ????????May your blessings out number the shamrocks that grow. And may trouble avoid you wherever you go???????? A photo posted by Lindsay Lohan (@lindsaylohan) on Mar 17, 2016 at 10:08am PDT The post Lindsay Lohan Dubsmashes Herself of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Lindsay Lohan Dubsmashes Herself of the Day

Ashley Tisdale Knows Her Angles of the Day

I have consistently been calling out Ashley Tisdale for having a monster face her entire career. I’ve also heard stories from people who went to school with her before she was a Disney Puppet claiming she’s 5 or 6 years older than she pretends to be, not that that matters, but I’m a man with many layers, I am not all hate, I can look at the positive, there are layers here, and in Ashley Tisdale’s case, her shitty face, bad nose job, and pretty boring vibe is outweighed by a fit body, hot ass and piles of money…so we like her…especially if she brown paper bags that shit…turning away from the camera works too… The post Ashley Tisdale Knows Her Angles of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Ashley Tisdale Knows Her Angles of the Day

Karrueche Tran in a Bikini of the Day

There’s some hood event happening in Miami, so all the “hood” girls like Karrueche Tran, who I don’t even know if she’s hood or not, the only thing I know about her is that she is or was Chris Brown’s girlfriend, which I guess is pretty gangster, not because Chris Brown is hard or anything, dude’s a little dancing queen, but he is strong and into beating women, clearly an emotional freak, and dealing with that, may be worth being put on the map…JUST ASK RIHANNA…but still a possible war zone…that she’s survived…. Here she is in Bikini… Here is her ass in shorts… TO SEE HER ASS IN SHORTS CLCIK HERE The post Karrueche Tran in a Bikini of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Karrueche Tran in a Bikini of the Day

Ass on the Baywatch Set of the Day

Baywatch is still being filmed in Miami…you know the land of Los Angeles County lifeguard because the ocean is warmer, the beach is nicer, and there is no risk of any of these soft acting idiots, whether it’s the tits from True Detective or the Tits from one issue of Sports Illustrated that Leo DiCaprio made into one of his own, and the only thing that surprises me is that there’s not that much controversial, on set paparazzi pics going on, they should be milking this shit hard – so that people beyond 40 year olds who watched Baywatch care…but then again, if that was the objective, they probably would have only hired VINE STARS for this low grade garbage you know you’re going to watch.. TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE The post Ass on the Baywatch Set of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Ass on the Baywatch Set of the Day

Charli XCX for Impulse Fragrance of the Day

Charli XCX is some low level Big Tits from the UK who wears a Leotard and uses every chance she gets to show off those tits and get noticed…and I guess it works, since she gets featured on songs, she gets paid by brands, she has concerts and I guess people pay to see her perform, and the funny thing is I was once in one of her events she was playing at. I was drunk and remember nothing, but thinking to myself “who is that midget in he leotard, are we at the circus”…I only found out it was Charli XCX after the fact at which point I said “What’s an XCX”….and I still don’t know because I don’t bother googling this shit, I just look at her tits in bathing suits…not because I care but because they are tits. The post Charli XCX for Impulse Fragrance of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Charli XCX for Impulse Fragrance of the Day

Willa Holland Ass in Jeans of the Day

We’ve gone over Willa Holland, who is in that Canadian shot show Arrow, but who I remember as a character on the OC from a year I watched TV with a friend who loved the OC, because he would use the latest episode as conversation starters in college bars in an era you had to talk to girls to fuck them or finger them on the dance floor…which he did…no matter how fat she was…in what would have been great memes if only I had a camera I’ve gone into her being Brian de Palma’s stepdaughter, possibly the inspiration of Dressed to Kill, a movie I wanted in the 80s and used to jerk off to the blonde bush of the main character, because blonde bush is so rare….prove me wrong blonde bushes out there… What I’m loving with this pic is the mom jeans, mom ass, reminding me of the 90s…when all asses looked this bad… I’m a fan… The post Willa Holland Ass in Jeans of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Willa Holland Ass in Jeans of the Day

Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris Bikini Vacation Porn of the Day

I guess Calvin Harris decided to secure his K-Fed of Taylor Swift, by showing her bikini body off to the world…saying “look my 2 x 4 of a girlfriend is worth hundreds of millions of dollars, and has been working on her booty, hopefully via pregnancy, because I need that Child support check for when the world realizes 40 year old DJs are pathetic, lame, and creepy. It’s also a good diversion from all the hookers I fuck on the road, if I post her pic, it’s like I don’t stick my dick in everything with a soul, since I am dating something without a soul and it gets exhausting trying to pretend to care about her money grubbing scam, until 50% of that money is mine, which is the goal”…. At least that’s how I read into this cheesy, but not as cheesy as being a DJ bullshit pics…. All I smell is the Herpes all these fuckers have… All this to say, what’s with her weird instagram booty pose, this is Taylor Swift, the conservative slut in high waisted shorts…what the fuck is she instagram modeling for..oh right..the DJ…Weird. A video posted by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on Mar 15, 2016 at 4:59pm PDT The post Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris Bikini Vacation Porn of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris Bikini Vacation Porn of the Day

Ava Sambora CameltoeHits Rock Bottom Before it Even Starts of the DAy

Ava Sambora is this amazing, cute, young, youthful, babe that Heather Locklear shat out of her during her Melrose Place Bon Jovi groupie years… She’s rich, she’s got a budget to be creating content and her own career as a lifestyle blogger, like a Kardashian only less troll like, and more blonde, fit and youthful on the beach… You know Richie Sambora and Heather Locklear’s troubled tween… who may not even be troubled, but just part of the era of social media stardom, and is now taking her modeling to the bottom of the fucking barrel… You may not know this, but this water company, who I avoid always, since it is owned by an evil paparazzi dude who tried to sue me at least once, understands that staged shitty paparazzi pics on the beach – get picked up by the press… They use that basic, bottom of the barrel fact to get girls into working for them for free, sometimes even promising them the “billboard” on the Sunset Strip which is a whole pile of bullshit… The girls they get are washed up, playboy cyber girls and other bottom feeding paparazzi whores…normally escorts…But the pics get picked up, since dude owns the pap agency and blogs like bikini pics… So it makes absolutely no sense, why a connected girl would look at this route and think it’s good strategy… She should just call me – I can help.. This is the equivalent of a finding out your daughter is on heroin…not just weed. Bad. So bad. Hot ass though. Hot young ass though… Ava…Answer my instagram message. TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE The post Ava Sambora CameltoeHits Rock Bottom Before it Even Starts of the DAy appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Ava Sambora CameltoeHits Rock Bottom Before it Even Starts of the DAy