Emmy Rossum has been naked so many times on TV, that I really don’t think her bikini selfies matter. She’s up on the – “we’ve seen you simulate sex enough to know that you love your body and think you’re worth more than you are, since you get paid well and you are living the dream you always had as a young girl in a single mother household that taught you the right way to whore yourself to the top of the food chain, or at least as close as you can get, with the little talent you have”…kind of thing… Or maybe I am just hard on her because I want to see her in self produced sex tapes, after seeing her in simulated sex.
Gigi Hadid. Daughter of Mohammed Hadid – some billionaire real estate developer who has some really powerful friends like the guy who owns Guess, because that’s how rich people function – they keep their 1 percent closely tied together – while making the 99 percent their fucking slaves…..so she was cute enough to use in campaigns, then she got passed around to other agencies, and now she’s in St Tropez, because that’s where all the cool kids, rich kids, exclusive kids summer…and she’s wearing a bikini that from this angle…isn’t so hot, but maybe I’m a just a hater and I should learn to love all asses…of all sizes and socio economic classes – no matter how rich or egotistical they are or how many times their dad jerks off to them because he made them and he jerks off to everything he’s ever made..including but not limited to – his silly botox smile… TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE
Hayden Panettiere is pregnant in a bikini. Call me old school but I am a firm believer that if you’re pregnant – you should not be in a bikini, but rather hiding out so that no one gets the wrong idea about you. More importantly so that we can try to forget you were ever pregnant – instead of having it burnt into our minds…with whatever the fuck this weirdness is…. All this to say, I don’t really like Hayden pregnant or not pregnant – and I don’t really like pregnant girls in general, especially not half naked, maybe my biological clock has ticked…and the idea of knocking a girl up disgusts me…even when I’m not the one who knocked them up… The world is doomed, it’s so easy to not make babies…and still be cummed inside…Get it together Hayden… TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE
Chloe Moretz is not exciting to me. She’s some 17 year olds in a bikini, but I don’t really need to tell you that, because you comic book nerds have been masturbating to her since she was 11 because she was in a superhero outfit and I guess that outfit overrides the fact that you’re a fucking creepy fucking pervert…so maybe these bikini pics won’t excite you because they aren’t “Action figure” enough for you…or maybe they will excite you so much that you won’t be able to leave your house for a fucking month, not that you ever do, you’re too busy in your RPG video game and these pics have nothing to do with your social awkwardness, they just compliment it… TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE
This perfect bikini body you’re currently drooling over apparently belongs to Cristina De Pin , an Italian model/actress who’s married to some Italian soccer player according to my sources. I don’t know what it is about these guys that they always seem to have the hottest wives, but after all the crazy-hot soccer WAGs we’ve been seeing lately, all I know is I definitely picked the wrong profession. Hmm, is it too late to change careers and become a world-famous soccer player? Photos: Fameflynet Continue reading →
Jordana Brewster isn’t exactly stacked in the funbag department, and she doesn’t do bikini yoga in the park, or “accidentally” bump into the paps leaving the gym in short shorts three times a week. So she doesn’t get nearly as much play on this site as some of the other hotties out there. But that doesn’t mean she can’t still deliver the goods, like she’s doing at the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles LA premiere here. So enjoy the rare treat, and if Jordana wants, I’m sure we can figure out other ways to get her on the site more. I’m thinking weekly lingerie selfies, but a sex tape works too. » view all 25 photos Photos: WENN.com Continue reading →
Lily Collins is one of Phil Collins’ many kids, who I don’t really think used Phil Collins to really get ahead in life, because he’s a touring Rockstar in the UK, and she was separated from him as a little kid, forced to live the life of luxury with her mother who was some socialite from LA before marrying Phil Collins…. I wouldn’t be surprised if she hasn’t seen much more than a check from the guy since she was 5, but that check helped the family afford a good life and good friends, and thus connections with good casting directors, producers and etc. I don’t know anything about her, or really care about her career, or her personally life. I am much more into staring at her shit covered ass…not because I am into scat…but because there is something magical from a girl from an affluent privileged life…smearing her own feces on herself like some bi-polar episode…those are serious daddy issues… Unless of course…she’s just rolled around in mud…in which case…less exciting but still involves staring at her ass…which is good enough for me to stare at…because every ass is…seriously, it doesn’t need an IMDB page or a hit making parent…it just needs to be half naked…
My dreams were answered last week when I posted bikini pics of what I consider a goddess sent from heaven, not polluted septic water Mexico, in her bikini…Jillian Murray….not because she flew into my arms and we started a life together because that’s what we are meant to do. It’s all part of being soul mates…and not because she had a movie premiere from her new horror movie and I was invited…but because she retweeted me…which may not be love, marriage, sex, a blow job, or even a hand job…hell it’s not even holding hands…but when you don’t leave your house, have friends, interact with people…it feels like it is… Jillian Murray is amazing, still in her bikini, probably with another man, breaking my heart…all while I love every second of it…thanks to that hot fucking body…I don’t mind sharing something that isn’t mine…I also don’t mine licking the screen even though the people around me in this starbucks seem to…
Sofia Vergara posted this picture of her in bikini bottoms – wearing the most ridiculous heels possible because they lean her out – make her seem sexier than she is – when the reality is she’s pushing 45, is a mom of at least one, and despite maintaining a hot body until she fucked the right producer to land the right show to be at the top of the food chain…but this right here is smoke and mirrors…living the luxury life…but rocking’ angles, so many angles and filters…to make you think she’s still as hot as she once was…as hot as she needed to be to seduce all the people who hooked her up…and really I don’t care what she looks like under a spotlight – with flats and no filter or make-up – with her belly hanging over her bathing suit…I care about the content she’s producing of herself for the internet…because that’s what I get to look at… Now I am not a fan, but I like that she gives so many 30 year old failures hope….that if they sleep with the right people they could be her too…cuz sometimes it takes being a failure at 30 to really realize what is important….
I know the nerds are pissed that the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie is going to ruin their childhoods or something, but for the rest of us, it’s just another great excuse to see Megan Fox show up to a bunch of red carpets looking smoking hot (as usual). Speaking of ruining childhoods though, I think it’s about time this sexy MILF finally ditched that 90210 loser husband of hers and ran off with yours truly. What, was that too mean? OK, fine. I guess I’d be okay with a secret affair instead. Call me! » view all 30 photos Photos: WENN.com Continue reading →
