Just when I thought I knew every no-name hottie out there, here’s one named Cassie Cardelle with a sexy lingerie shoot for Rukus Magazine . Now according to my research, Cassie is a wannabe pop star or something. In which case, she should totally get in touch with me. Not because I can help her career or have contacts in the music business anything, but because I’d really enjoy seeing this killer body of hers in person. So how about it? Call me?
I can barely remember the last time I saw Mischa Barton . To be honest, I kind of forget all about her, but she definitely got my attention again with these pictures from the 8th Annual BritWeek Launch Party. So let this be a lesson to all you ladies out there: if you want to get on the Tuna’s radar, all it takes is landing an invite to some celebrity event and then dropping a good amount of cleavage. I’m not sure how Mischa scored that first part, but if she can still do it, I’m sure it can’t be too hard, right? » view all 26 photos Photos: WENN.com
Since you guys me and the Little Tuna dug those awesome bikini pictures from Constance Nunes so much the last time, here’s another great set for your my viewing pleasure. I’ve heard people say that the key to great work is doing what you love, and if that’s the case, I guess this must be one of my best posts yet, because I’m definitely loving these pictures right now. Enjoy. Photos: Fameflynet
It’s been a while since I’ve done a post on her, but here’s Victoria’s Secret hottie Maryna Linchuk doing what she does best: looking smoking hot in a bikini, and making me need to take my third cold shower of the day. That said, I do have one minor complaint when it comes to Maryna — her Instagram is seriously lacking in the bikini and lingerie selfie department. And I just hope she fixes that soon, because it’s the best thing she could do to help take her career to the next level. Well, that and date a certain celebrity blogger, but I figure one out of two will do for now.
Am I wrong in thinking that the ideal Miley Cyrus hospital porn takes place in a code blue or whatever it is they call the bitch gone into a flatline, because she’s lived too long, too well, with no respect for the world or herself and that kind of punishment from God, on a religious day like Easter just makes sense…it’s like stop planting santanic demon shit in the mind of our youth, even though we like young girls in leotards jacked up their ass twerking…making me think maybe Miley is onto something, and maybe she did flatline last week, that’s why she’s still in the hospital, and maybe this is her resurrection like she was the Messiah and the world will follow her jiggle her ass like an identity crisis rich kid with no clue…because that is her calling… Either way, girls debilitated on breathing machines, are porn to you, because it means they can’t outrun you…weirdo.
Maryna Linchuk is a bikini model who I guess isn’t under contract with Victoria’s Secret, despite doing Victoria’s Secret many times….unless my theory of Victoria’s Secret being an evil empire that owns all bikini and lingerie manufacturing in Asia, basically controlling every brand trying to compete with them, by controlling their costs and quality, possibly even making more money making for other people than themselves, because they don’t have marketing costs or retail rents to pay, making them use their models, just give the girls more work, and garner more exposure, all to benefit their evil ways….or maybe I look into “Lingerie” wars too seriously….and bitches are just free agents to get half naked for whoever they want to… Either way, it happened…
Candice Accola is here to prove to everyone that just because you are on TV, doesn’t mean you should be getting into bikinis for the paparazzi, because not all pop tarts on TV are created equally. You probably don’t know Candice Accola, but she’s from Florida, a land to obesity, insanity, and girls who look a hell of a lot better than Candice Accola in their bikinis, because unlike Candice Accola, they are either drug addicted, or busy working on it, rather than throwing in the towel because she got on TV and that was enough for her… She’s on a show called Vampire Diaries, but should be in the gym. Her boxy untoned body…has eaten too many tacos… TO SEE THE BIKINI PICS CLICK HERE
If you’re in the mood for another Playboy model putting on a great bikini show at the beach, you’re in luck today. Because here’s Lexi Marlow looking very, uh, talented in her latest photoshoot. Apparently she’s from Texas, but that’s as far as I got in my research before getting kicked out of the Starbucks for violating their ridiculous “no pants, no service” policy. Anyway, luckily you don’t need too much extra info to look at a hottie in a bikini, so just go ahead and enjoy. Photos: Fameflynet
I know I fall in love with pretty much every new bikini model I seem to post on the site, but the way I see it, this is a numbers game and I’m just increasing my odds. I figure one of these days, one of these no-name hotties is bound to appreciate the fact that a big-time celebrity blogger they’ve never met was drooling over them on the Internet. So here’s my latest pick: Lelia Thomas . According to my research, Leila’s from Hawaii, which means she was pretty much born to wear a bikini. Great, I’m sold, now where do I send my marriage proposal? » view all 19 photos
Since I liked those pictures of French cutie Jehane Gigi Paris so much the last time, I figured I’d do another post on her again today. Because A) she looks great in a bikini, and B) I’m hoping that declaring my love for her via the Internet might help convince her that the next step in her career should involve dating a celebrity blogger. Although judging from my Instagram creeping, I think Gigi might have a boyfriend. But that’s never stopped me before. Well, mostly because this move has never worked for me before. But hey, there’s always a first time for everything, right? Wish me luck. » view all 18 photos
