Tag Archives: izabel-goulart

Olivia Munn Dislocates her Shoulder of the Day

This video would have been way better if she died at the end. Not because I like when people die in videos, in fact I normally hate it, but Olivia Munn is the devil, or a bitch who has sold her soul to the devil for some low level fame, and I think the world would be a better place without her. All this to say, too bad she didn’t die at the end….this is staged…like put out hoping people post it and it goes viral…because when my friends dislocate their shoulders they usually scream… This would be a tragic video for the people who have castings with her next week, because she normally uses that arm to jerk them off, but the good news for them is that she’s pretty well-versed and will be able to jerk them off with her mouth….so injury or not…she’ll be ok…which is too bad, because I wish bad things on her….

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Olivia Munn Dislocates her Shoulder of the Day

Izabel Goulart’s Workout Pic of the Day

I don’t know when my love for skinny girls, I’m talking emaciated half dead, weak and unable to say no or run from my predator instincts, all eating a stick of gum and diet coke for their daily calorie intake, turned into being into healthy and fit girls who don’t do drugs, or smoke, or eat processed food…but it happened…. It probably has something to do with Anorexic chicks not getting their periods and thus not being fertile enough to be considered women despite the vagina hanging out their weak body…and Izabel Goulart, ex Victoria’s Secret model, rocks her fitness game on instagram hard, making following her and jerking off to her pics a little easier and worth doing…here she is in Today’s fitness.

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Izabel Goulart’s Workout Pic of the Day

Cintia Dicker for AMAZONpower of the Day

Cintia Dicker is the Brazilian redhead who I want to have sex with because she’s Brazilian and a redhead…I mean that and she’s got a bunch of followers and a modeling agency…which is now a prerequisite for me to masturbate to you…it’s like I need the professional endorsement and support of many to make me think a bitch is worthy….if you’re not published half naked in magazines you don’t fucking matter…especially if you’re a redhead…because redheads are hit and miss and often times disgusting, scary and out of a horror movie…with contrasting pubic hair to vagina lips that are not erotic but just weird…but this redhead is all exotic and shit…the kind you would be crazy not to want to have sex with and now she’s posing for some bullshit…who cares..

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Cintia Dicker for AMAZONpower of the Day

Cintia Dicker for AMAZONpower of the Day

Cintia Dicker is the Brazilian redhead who I want to have sex with because she’s Brazilian and a redhead…I mean that and she’s got a bunch of followers and a modeling agency…which is now a prerequisite for me to masturbate to you…it’s like I need the professional endorsement and support of many to make me think a bitch is worthy….if you’re not published half naked in magazines you don’t fucking matter…especially if you’re a redhead…because redheads are hit and miss and often times disgusting, scary and out of a horror movie…with contrasting pubic hair to vagina lips that are not erotic but just weird…but this redhead is all exotic and shit…the kind you would be crazy not to want to have sex with and now she’s posing for some bullshit…who cares..

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Cintia Dicker for AMAZONpower of the Day

Izabel Goulart Hot Nutrilatina Campaign of the Day

Izabel Goulart is pretty fucking fit. I guess that’s what happens when you have a taste of the good Victoria’s Secret life and they fire you for no good reason, making you feel like you’re totally inadequate after years of performing for them…you know all up on your high horse killin’it…which is one of my favorite fucking things…because if you’re in a position to make a girl a star and take it the fuck away from her…just to fuck with her mind and her relevance in the world…because you can…is pretty fucking funny to remind her that she’s replaceable…it makes for better blow jobs…or in her case..it makes for more sit-ups…

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Izabel Goulart Hot Nutrilatina Campaign of the Day

Izabel Goulart Hot Nutrilatina Campaign of the Day

Izabel Goulart is pretty fucking fit. I guess that’s what happens when you have a taste of the good Victoria’s Secret life and they fire you for no good reason, making you feel like you’re totally inadequate after years of performing for them…you know all up on your high horse killin’it…which is one of my favorite fucking things…because if you’re in a position to make a girl a star and take it the fuck away from her…just to fuck with her mind and her relevance in the world…because you can…is pretty fucking funny to remind her that she’s replaceable…it makes for better blow jobs…or in her case..it makes for more sit-ups…

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Izabel Goulart Hot Nutrilatina Campaign of the Day

Izabel Goulart is Awesome on Instagram of the Day

Izabel Goulart is really good at Instagram…from her killer fucking bikini body…to her fitness…I think I may be in love…I think this is the Brazilian object of my desire, who I want to sing love songs to and romance into the next great American love story, one that movies will be based on…movies like “ASS RIMMING 19 – ENTER THE BRAZILIAN DRAGON”…not that I know if Brazil even has dragons, but you get what I’m saying, and that is that I’ve never felt a love like this before…that I cherish this love…and that I’ve learned to love again…because he’s fucking amazing…roses and rim jobs and marriage people…that’s all I see.

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Izabel Goulart is Awesome on Instagram of the Day

Every Single Hot Babe Showed Up To amfAR’s 20th Annual Cinema Against AIDS

When I woke up this morning and saw that every single sexy model, actress, and famous-for-nothing babe showed up to amfAR’s 20th Annual Cinema Against AIDS event in Cannes, I was extremely pissed off that I was not invited. I guess, the invitation must have got lost in the mail because I’m sure that Paz Vega, Stacy Keibler, Eva Herzigova, Kylie Minogue, Izabel Goulart, Olivia Palermo, Karly Kloss, Rosario Dawson, Jessica Chastain, Alessandra Ambrosio, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Isabeli Fontana, Petra Nemcova, Toni Garn, Lily Donaldson, Karolina Kurkova, Irina Shayk, Jessica Hart, Julia Restoin Roitfeld, Milla Jovovich, Bianca Balti, Selita Ebanks and Tamara Ecclestone would have wanted the sexiest celeb blogger in the world there. At least that is what I’m telling myself.

Izabel Goulart in the Making of her GQ Brasil Photoshoot of the Day

I posted Izaebel Goulart GQ pics last week. I thought it was for Mexico and mocked the likelihood of there being much of an office or people working there…you know cuz Mexicans are lazy and would have no budget for photoshoots or even camera equipment……but apparently, it is for GQ Brasil, which would make sense, since it is where she lives and more importantly, where she is celebrated as a big star who made it in America….and thank god for that…because a life without pics of her posing like this is a life not worth living….I mean semi-retired, old tired models doing sexy shit….even if we’ve SEEN IZABEL GOULART LIKE THIS MANY TIMES BEFORE including some pics WITH NIPPLE but I’ll take these pics anyway…

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Izabel Goulart in the Making of her GQ Brasil Photoshoot of the Day

Izabel Goulart Hot for GQ Mexico of the Day

These pictures of Izabel Goulart are for May’s issue of GQ Mexico, which I like to interpret as “Probably old pics of Izabel Goulart being re-used for a fringe market for GQ” and not actually new pics of her, but I’m not about to go through the Izabel Goulart archives of half naked pics to figure out if these are in fact sloppy seconds, because I don’t really care, I’m ore into just staring them, imagining dirty things I would do to her Brazilian ass, like threaten to have her deported if she doesn’t clean my dick with her mouth faster, and things like that, rather than understanding the GQ Mexico operations, that I can safely assume are one dude in a beater, smoking a cigar, in a cinder block home while his wife is out back milking the Donkey. Right? Here are the pics.

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Izabel Goulart Hot for GQ Mexico of the Day