Tag Archives: Jessica Simpson

Jade Ewen Knows How To Impress

Clearly I don’t know who the hell this Jade Ewen bird is, she’s at the Scottish Fashion Awards so I can’t be the only one who’s never heard of her, but she’s got my attention with some very impressive cleavage. I think this might be the first time I’ve gone through all twelve pictures in a post, I never do that, and each one gets better and better. Seriously, her cleavage gets more impressive with every shot. I wish I could make a flip book out of them. It would definitely have a happy ending.

Jessica Sutta Shakes Her Short Shorts

I can’t really be bothered to look up this Jessica Sutta chick, I think she was a Pussycat Doll or something like that, but I found these shots of her shaking her lady business on stage in a sexy little outfit so it doesn’t really matter who she is. Is that just a weird pair of acid wash short shorts or did she have a little accident? I think Kirstie Alley makes underwear for that kind of thing now. Maybe it’s just a sweaty crotch. Ugh, that doesn’t really make it any better.

Julianne Hough Is Still Premiering That Movie

Are you getting sick of Julianne Hough yet? Me neither. Here she is at another premiere or party or whatever this is for that Rock Of Ages garbage. How many premieres can one stupid movie have? Anyhow, she’s showing off her tight body in a flashy neon yellow dress so who cares. I like it and all, but I think she needs to hang up the classy dresses and slip into the trashier ones, the ones she’d wear if she was single and trying to make someone jealous. You know the ones I’m talking about.

Say Goodbye To Jessica Simpson’s Big Breasts

Now that Jessica Simpson has fattened herself up and squeezed out a baby, I wonder if she even noticed she gave birth, she can get to work at her new job of losing weight for Weight Watchers . I don’t envy anyone who’s got to be around this chick while she diets, I can’t imagine she’ll be all that pleasant, but before she does I wanted to post one last goodbye to her massive massive pregnancy boobs…. You’ll be missed ladies. Now hit the treadmill.

Julianne Hough & Malin Akerman Hotness

I posted pictures earlier today of Audrina Patridge and Stacy Keibler calling the duo a sexy tag team, but after seeing these pictures of Malin Akerman and Julianne Hough getting up close and personal at the Guys Choice awards, I think I might be torn as to which team is hotter. I think the only fair way to determine the winner is a no holds barred tag team girl-on-girl evening gown leg wrestling match. I’ll bring the baby powder, in case there’s any chafing.

Jessica Simpson: Planning a Wedding ALREADY (After Being Engaged For 18 Months)!

Jessica Simpson and Eric Johnson are planning a wedding ALREADY, according to Life & Style. They’ve been engaged since November 2010, but whatever! Jessica welcomed baby Maxwell just a few weeks ago, but the designer, singer and actress has yet to slow down, given her $4 million Weight Watchers deal . Now she’s busy planning a wedding, too! An insider reveals to the new issue of Life & Style that Jessica and her fianc

The Side-Eye: John Mayer Says He And His Racist Schlong Had To Take A Break After Doing A Bunch Of “Dumb Interviews”

SMH at this guy . John Mayer is still doing damage control over all that dumb isht he said TWO YEARS AGO: Following two explosive interviews with Playboy and Rolling Stone in 2010, where he likened his chemistry with Jessica Simpson to “sexual napalm” and blamed his split with Jennifer Aniston on his frequent tweeting, Mayer felt the need to escape. “It was a very strange time and it sort of rocketed me into adulthood. It was a violent crash into being an adult,” Mayer, 34, said on The Ellen DeGeneres Show Tuesday. “For a couple of years it was just figuring it all out ,and I’m glad I actually stayed out of the spotlight. Because I think back then I would of said, ‘Give me two weeks or let me get out and do Ellen and let me explain myself.’ It was like, ‘No, idiot. Go away and be 33 and 34 instead of 28 for the fourth year.” Mayer said he “had to go home for a minute” to heal from the backlash in 2010. “The plan that originally gets you out of high school and your hometown, in front of people, that plan was over. I had done it. I just sort of lost my head for a little while.” The “Shadow Days” singer — whose new album, Born and Raised, will be released May 22 — was forced to cancel his 21-city tour in March in order to remove a granuloma just above his vocal cord. (He first had surgery to remove the enlarged nodule in October 2011.) “It’s not a health concern whatsoever, but it has taken me out of singing,” Mayer told host Ellen DeGeneres, 54. “I tried to beat it the first time and couldn’t.” Mayer then explained how the medical procedure works. “They cut this thing out of your throat and then they inject your vocal cords with Botox, which freezes your vocal cords so that this thing can heal without smacking up against the other side,” he said. “I just need more Botox next time.” SMH @ them mentioning him fouling up Jen Aniston and Jessica Simpson but leaving out the n-word and the fact that he said he has a racist peen that would only let him close to black women that look like Kerry Washington or Holly Robinson Peete. Karma is a muhfugga though. Prolly why his voice is all messed up now! Source Continue reading

Making It Rain On Them Hoes: People Magazine To Pay $800K For First Photos Of Jessica Simpson’s Precious Daughter Maxwell Drew

Cha-Ching! Jessica Simpson will soon have more gwap to cop those precious lil headbands she likes so much for lil Maxwell Drew. People magazine will pay the first-time mom $800,000 to publish exclusive photos of Maxwell Drew Johnson, the pop star’s 2-week-old daughter with fiance Eric Johnson, Women’s Wear Daily reported Friday. Simpson, who gained at least 40 pounds during her pregnancy, also has reportedly inked a $3 million dollar deal to promote Weight Watchers. Though Maxwell may be worth her weight in gold, Simpson’s deal with People falls short of the $6 million the publication reportedly paid Jennifer Lopez for photos of her twins in 2008. Ouch, Max and Emme just made lil Maxie look like she ain’t doin’ isht when it comes to that magazine cover paper! Jessica should still be proud though, she’s probably going to make more off Maxwell’s birth than her last album. Source WENN

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Making It Rain On Them Hoes: People Magazine To Pay $800K For First Photos Of Jessica Simpson’s Precious Daughter Maxwell Drew

Making It Rain On Them Hoes: People Magazine To Pay $800K For First Photos Of Jessica Simpson’s Precious Daughter Maxwell Drew

Cha-Ching! Jessica Simpson will soon have more gwap to cop those precious lil headbands she likes so much for lil Maxwell Drew. People magazine will pay the first-time mom $800,000 to publish exclusive photos of Maxwell Drew Johnson, the pop star’s 2-week-old daughter with fiance Eric Johnson, Women’s Wear Daily reported Friday. Simpson, who gained at least 40 pounds during her pregnancy, also has reportedly inked a $3 million dollar deal to promote Weight Watchers. Though Maxwell may be worth her weight in gold, Simpson’s deal with People falls short of the $6 million the publication reportedly paid Jennifer Lopez for photos of her twins in 2008. Ouch, Max and Emme just made lil Maxie look like she ain’t doin’ isht when it comes to that magazine cover paper! Jessica should still be proud though, she’s probably going to make more off Maxwell’s birth than her last album. Source WENN

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Making It Rain On Them Hoes: People Magazine To Pay $800K For First Photos Of Jessica Simpson’s Precious Daughter Maxwell Drew

Dominique Storelli Unknown Bikini Pictures

I’ve never heard of this Dominique Storelli chick, but she wore a bikini to some party she was invited to this past weekend so she’s my kind of girl. Apparently she’s the cover girl of the March issue of Maxim magazine. Whooptidoo! I don’t care about any of that, she basically wore a thong bikini and heels on the red carpet… That’s all I’m getting from these shots. I should have invited her to my Mother’s Day party. Next year.