I’m not really liking this pregnant Jessica Simpson anymore, enough is enough, she’s absolutely massive and has to be ready to pop any day now. Squeeze the little ankle biter out and get started with the Weight Watcher’s experiment you’ve signed up to so we can get back to the old Jessica we all used to know and love so much. The one that used to contribute to erections, not completely ruin them.
As far as lesbian fantasies go, this isn’t exactly the hottest thing I’ve ever seen, but I suppose I can use my imagination. Here are Julianne Hough and Kristen Bell getting all sexy at some sort of denim clothing drive. I’m not sure a lot of porns start off this way, but Kristen is wearing some tight ass leather pants and sexy heels…. I guess that’s a start. At least touch each other inappropriately.
I know that Jessica Simpson is pregnant and all and, but I realy wasn’t expecting her to get THIS massive. She’s huge!!!! Here she is showing off that gigantic baby bump on the red carpet for something in a dress that really wasn’t designed for this kind of thing. I’m not sure this can really be called a baby bump anymore, maybe a baby mound or a baby explosion, but it’s definitely not a bump anymore. Are we sure she’s not having triplets? I think she’s overindulged with the corn dogs.
‘I’m gonna be like a different person’ in 2012, rapper jokes to Sway on ‘RapFix Live.’ By Rob Markman, with reporting by Sway Calloway Maino on ‘RapFix Live’ Photo: Natasha Chandel/ MTV News With 2011 out of the door and the New Year upon us, Maino is looking forward to the coming 12 months. Every year since 2009, the Brooklyn MC has released a predictions-themed song. On his “2011 Predictions” Main successfully guessed that Lindsay Lohan would have relapsing bouts with alcohol and that the Throne would sell over a million records. On Wednesday’s “RapFix Live,” Maino dropped some major 2012 predictions. “I got a couple,” the rapper admitted when Sway asked him what reveals he had for the next 12 months. “Forget what you heard, Obama’s gonna win.” That wasn’t all, however. “This is the year you gonna see a transformation for me. I’m gonna be like a different person. I’m gonna get caught up in a love triangle,” Maino said, pausing before adding, “with Rihanna and Katy Perry.” Maino’s playful prediction may seem far-fetched, but with the news that Perry’s hubby Russell Brand has filed for divorce , the pop star is back on the market. As far as Rihanna, the Bajan beauty revealed to Ellen DeGeneres in a November 2011 interview that she is very single . So from a logistical standpoint anything is possible — we guess. That wasn’t all. Maino, who has stood as one of rap’s top street artists, says he is about to undergo an artistic change as well. “I’m leaving rap. I’m leaving hip-hop. I’m gonna become an R&B artist. I’ma be the artist formerly known as Maino, but my new name is gonna be Jaguar Paw,” he joked. “These is my predictions.” What do you think of Maino’s predictions for 2012? Tell us in the comments! Related Videos ‘RapFix Live’ With Maino Related Artists Maino Rihanna Katy Perry
With a new series from Steven Spielberg plus the return of ‘Mad Men’ and many others, TV addicts have a lot to get hyped about. By Jim Cantiello The cast of “Jersey Shore” Photo: MTV “Revenge,” “American Horror Story,” “New Girl,” 2 Broke Girls,” “Girl Girl” (OK, we made that last one up). Coming off one of the most satisfying fall seasons in recent memory, 2012 has a lot to live up to in order to keep TV addicts hyped up in the new year. Admit it, couch potatoes: We’ve been spoiled. Can the upcoming midseason keep the momentum going? Perhaps the biggest hope for viewers is Steven Spielberg ‘s “Smash,” a new musical series starring “American Idol” alum Katharine McPhee and “Will & Grace” star Debra Messing. Although “Glee” comparisons are unavoidable (OMG, people are singing songs and dancing on prime-time TV!), the extended previews suggest a more mature affair. “Smash” is a warts-and-all depiction of what it’s like to create a new Broadway show. Competing actresses, sparring producers, Anjelica Friggin’ Huston in your living room chewing scenery every week … What’s not to love? Spielberg isn’t the only movie maverick headed to the television world this year. “Paranormal Activity” mastermind Oren Peli is partially responsible for ABC’s “The River,” in which a travelogue host goes missing in the Amazon, sparking a rescue mission led by his wife, son and former TV crew. Will Peli’s patented “found footage” device work on the boob tube? Small-screen suspense is hot thanks to Ryan Murphy’s “American Horror Story,” whose addictive first season wrapped up before Christmas. However, Murphy’s Achilles heel is sustaining quality and buzz over multiple seasons (see “Nip/Tuck,” “Glee”), so fans are cautiously optimistic for its return in the fall. Murphy also has his hand in a new sitcom pilot about a gay couple and a surrogate that caused a bidding war between all the major networks, not to mention several feature films in development and the third season of “Glee,” which continues to roll along. Fingers crossed Murphy can stay focused enough on F/X’s breakout gothic hit to keep season two just as juicy and batsh– as its debut. Speaking of shows that derailed after one season, “Heroes” creator Tim Kring is back on the network horse, bringing the touchy-feely father-son drama “Touch” to Fox this spring. The premise? Kiefer Sutherland plays a widowed dad struggling to take care of his mute, autistic son. Can’t wait to watch Ryan Seacrest awkwardly interview Kiefer in the “Idol” audience about that one. There’s a mini-“Lost” reunion happening on Fox thanks to “Alcatraz,” J.J. Abrams’ latest. It’s a (what else?) convoluted mystery that takes place on an island! Instead of plane crash survivors, this one’s about long-deceased guards and inmates reappearing decades later. Hurley (a.k.a. Jorge Garcia) co-stars. No word yet on whether the smoke monster will make a cameo. In 2011, MTV had a breakout year with scripted television thanks to action-packed “Teen Wolf” and sharply hilarious “Awkward.” Both of your faves will be back this summer, with “Teen Wolf” expanding to 24 episodes and “Awkward.” boasting new love woes for Jenna. Brooklyn-based comedy “I Just Want My Pants Back” will get the full-season treatment in February. And millions of fist-pumpers will be happy when America’s most popular partiers get belligerent in Seaside Heights when the fifth season of “Jersey Shore” spreads like an STD on January 5. On the opposite end of the TV spectrum, AMC’s “Mad Men” will finally be back in March. We’ve waited longer than usual for new Don Draper exploits thanks to a behind-the-scenes kerfuffle between show creator Matthew Weiner and the cable network. Now that the contracts have been signed, we can all jump back into the adventures of the 1960s advertising world. For those of you who forgot where we left off (spoilers on the way), Don’s engaged to secretary Megan, his (crazy!) ex-wife is shacking up with a politician, Joan’s preggers and their preteen daughter is a chronic masturbator. And you wonder why this show wins a million Emmys. The other Emmy favorite, “30 Rock,” has found itself stuck between a very odd rock and hilarious hard place now that Kim Jong-il has passed away. Remember, last season ended with Jack Donaghy’s wife, Avery Jessup, kidnapped in North Korea and forcibly married to Jong-il’s son Kim Jong-un. Given the breaking news, the show’s sixth season may need to re-vamp its planned plotline with Margaret Cho as the recently deceased dictator. Showrunner Robert Carlock recently told the press that “30 Rock” plans on airing the episodes they’ve already banked with Cho and aren’t even sure they’ll kill off her character at all. Sounds twisted! Reality junkies are stoked for the second season of Lifetime’s “Dance Moms,” launching January 10. Pittsburgh’s leading instructor for aspiring Broadway starlets Abby Lee Miller is looking to add a new dancer to her competitive troupe. Grab-the-popcorn alert: A new dancer means a new mom with whom she will clash. Loudly. Plus, producers have smartly signed on rival Candy Apples dance instructor Cathy Nesbitt-Stein for another batch of episodes. 2012 will also bring us explosive new seasons of “The Real Housewives of New Jersey” (long in the can and still making headlines thanks to public feuds between castmembers), Oxygen’s late-bloomer “The Glee Project” and a bigger, badder, bolder “X Factor” this fall. “X”-man Simon Cowell recently promised a “blood bath” behind the scenes. RIP awkward host Steve Jones? Aspiring fashionistas have a lot to add to their DVRs. ABC Family’s latest is called “Jane by Design,” sort of a weekly “Devil Wears Prada” for the teenage set. NBC is premiering Elle Macpherson and Jessica Simpson’s reality competition “Fashion Star” in March. Lifetime is airing a full “Project Runway All Stars” season (featuring MTV News fave Sweet P!) as well as a new show called “24 Hour Catwalk,” hosted by Alexa Chung. The CW has a “Kitchen Nighmares”-type series about modeling agencies called “Running Out of TV Ideas,” I mean, “Remodeled.” Lastly, Rachel Zoe’s former assistant Brad Goreski gets top billing in Bravo’s “It’s a Brad, Brad World,” beginning January 2. That’s a lot of look. And finally, as if you need any reminding, “American Idol” is back for its 11th season on January 18. Last year boasted beefy ratings despite star Simon Cowell jumping ship, a winner who shattered Billboard country records and more frilly scarves than HSN’s stockroom courtesy of new judge Steven Tyler . However, last year’s “AI” premiered in a pre-“Voice,” pre-“X Factor” landscape. With NBC’s blind-auditions-and-Xtina-in-a-swivel-chair gimmick returning in a cushy post-Super Bowl spot (where, coincidentally, “Idol’s” sophomore season kicked off in 2003), and with “The X Factor” shattering pre-conceived notions of what reality production value can be, will the aging Fox staple now seem quaint? Or perhaps it will feel like a familiar hug from a grandmother. Regardless, even if the reality juggernaut loses half its audience, it will still make the network oodles of money. In other words, “American Idol” may outlive us all. What shows are you most excited to see return? Any new series already set on your DVR? Let us know in the comments! 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Here are some shitty, boring pictures of Jessica Simpson pregnant and showing some mom to be tit, only because she’s got a filled up with fetus uterus inside her and her obesity is officially justified…. and some of you weirdos are into that…I prefer my women infertile…unless they are Jessica Simpson and own a billion dollar clothing empire for me to K-Fed…but that’s just because I’m too lazy to make my own money, and her white trash retard ways would be easier to manipulate than to mount like the tired old pony she is….shitty pics with shitty commentary for shitty readers….that’s what keeps this site barely afloat…thanks for that….I need a drink….
Justin Bieber and Mariah Carey make our list of yuletide favorites. By Jocelyn Vena Justin Bieber Photo: Getty Images Looking for some inspiration for Christmas-themed music? Well, don’t worry, MTV News has wrapped up a special holiday playlist so that you can get into the spirit of the season. Grab a glass of eggnog, put on your best reindeer sweater and snuggle up by the fire with these choice tunes. “Mistletoe,” Justin Bieber Bieber’s modern-day missive (released in 2011 off of Under the Mistletoe ) about kissing under the mistletoe certainly harks back to carols of days gone by, but he updates the narrative using his own fly-boy language, referring to his girl as his “shawty.” Awww! “All I Want for Christmas Is You,” Mariah Carey Perhaps the most ubiquitous pop song of the last 20 years, Carey’s iconic single may have been reimagined by Bieber , but it will forever be associated with Carey, her skimpy Santa suit and her desire to be reunited with her boy. “Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays,” *NSYNC Spunky and funky, *NSYNC’s 1998 track is all about getting together with your friends and family and wishing them “Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays” — a fitting sentiment for folks of all persuasions. “My Only Wish (This Year),” Britney Spears Like Carey before her, Britney uses her sugary sweet, incredibly innocent ode to the holidays to pine away for the one thing she hopes Santa can get her: her one true love. “Last Christmas,” Wham! George Michael had one message for that ex-special someone: This year, to save him from tears, he’ll give his heart to someone special. After it was released, the song immediately became a Christmas staple with radio and local malls playing it endlessly through the season. “Do They Know It’s Christmas?” Band Aid While many Christmas songs focus on chestnuts roasting on an open fire, 1984’s A-list-filled charity single reminded the world that not everyone has chestnuts or an open fire. “Santa Claus Is Comin’ to Town,” Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band This song had already been recorded and re-recorded, but when Springsteen put his Jersey sass on the Christmas classic, it became the type of jovial, rocked-out tune cool enough to top the lists of his fans. “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home),” U2 Darlene Love may have recorded the track in 1963, but Bono and his boys put their own spin on the song when they released it in 1987. It’s all about wanting your baby to come home to you on Christmas. And, really, who doesn’t want that? “Baby, It’s Cold Outside,” Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson In a world where these two are still together, it would actually be a cute idea to have this real-life couple sing about wanting to stay warm with one another on a chilly winter night. “Don’t Shoot Me Santa,” The Killers Every Christmas playlist needs a kooky take on the holidays, and the Las Vegas band’s spin on pleading with Santa to cut them a break is a bit country, a bit rock and roll, and all fun. See also: Blink-182’s “I Won’t Be Home for Christmas.” “I’ll Be Home for Christmas,” Michael Bubl
I was kind of in the mood for a fattie this morning, I guess all the oversized waitresses from last night somehow got into my subconscious, so that’s where these shots of Jessica Simpson come in. Here she is out doing some holiday shopping with her fancy designer tarp covering her massive body. I don’t like it. And as if to add insult to injury, I’ve got a video of Jessica back when her body was absolutely banging. The good old days. This baby has got to get out of there. *Vote for Jessica Simpson in the 2011 Hollywood Tuna Hottie of the Year Poll
Sad sack Teen Mom train wreck Amber Portwood is still behind pars, and to add insult to injury, the Indiana native’s latest mug shot has just been released. Not surprisingly, she doesn’t look too pleased. Amber was arrested Monday after she failed to show up to her latest probation hearing … and authorities sent to Amber’s house found pills in her purse. She couldn’t prove she had a prescription for the pills, resulting in a clear violation of probation and another stint in jail for Portwood. Cue the mug shot: Portwood was on probation after she was convicted of domestic battery for attacking her ex-fiance, Gary Shirley. Amber’s sentence to two years in jail was suspended, provided Portwood stuck to the rules of her probation, which was highly unlikely . After her latest arrest, Amber could end up spending her Christmas behind bars – for the second consecutive year. A court hearing is reportedly set for January 13, and given the circumstances surrounding her case, don’t expect bail to be offered. Oh well. Check out THG’s ever-expanding gallery of celebrity mug shots !
Jessica Simpson is pregnant, and put off her wedding as a result of that unexpected joy, but she’s still planning on getting married to Eric Johnson next year. She’s been shopping for the big day in fact. The expectant 31-year-old star was spotted visiting a Monique Lhuillier wedding boutique Sunday in L.A. Dresses in the store range from $3,000-20,000. So is she planning to wed while pregnant? Simpson and Eric Johnson got engaged on November 11, 2010. The wedding was pushed back after she got pregnant, but she’s adamant it’s still on. After they’ve welcomed their little one. “I didn’t want to be stressed,” she said. “Now when I get stressed it’s like 50 times worse. I really want to enjoy that day, and now I get to have my baby with me.” “We were always going to wait [until] after the baby. We flirted around with different dates before I found out I was pregnant, and thankfully we didn’t lock anything down. I want to enjoy the day… I’m glad we didn’t make a deposit.” Seriously. Phew. How could she afford that kind of financial hit. It’s not like she’s getting paid $3 million to shed her baby weight or anything. [Photo: Fame Pictures]
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