This just in, Rihanna, still turns me on, at least on Social Media, even if she’s not very interesting at anything she does, and is more of a animatronic sex robot used to brain wash the youth into thinking it is ok to get beat by your man, flash your tits, and be sex obsessed in all that you do, because being sex obsessed landed her a gig as a hooker at 14, that blossomed into this ridiculous career. I think I am just into her now that she’s not as fat as she used to be. Either way, here’s what she’s sharing on Social Media.
The Kris Humphries hate train just gained a new passenger. In light of the basketball player no-showing his divorce hearing today in Los Angeles, the judge in charge of the case has ripped Humphries to shreds, saying he mocked and disrespected the court by simply… not showing up. As far as anyone knows, Humphries had no reason to skip out on the mandatory conference. He simply chose to remain in New York. As a result, Judge Goldberg set a sanction hearing and may fine Kris for his absence. BOTH parties are now required to appear in court on April 19 for a pre-trial hearing, with May 6 still the date on which this never-ending divorce will hopefully be settled. Of course, Kardashian will miss the first day of that trial because she must promote her fragrance. And so this ridiculous saga goes. In Kim’s defense, witnesses say she showed up to court on time, answered questions in a professional manner and kept her giant boobs totally hidden.
This was a terrific year for movies. I don’t know that I have more to say about it as a whole than that, because 2012 was such a varied year in cinema, too. We saw procedurals, Zero Dark Thirty and Lincoln , that dug into the immense work behind known moments in history; movies about the movies, like Holy Motors and The Cabin in the Woods , and sensory creations like Beasts of the Southern Wild and The Master , with their very different protagonists who each seem, at times, tuned into a clearer sense of the universe. This year also saw the continued fade-out of celluloid and the push for new cinematic experiences with the 48fps of The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey , the 3D wizardry of Life of Pi and the prosthetic and make-up-aided gender and ethnicity crossing-casting of Cloud Atlas . But my biggest pleasures in the theater this year tended to be the old-fashioned type: from a luscious 70mm screening of The Master at the Ziegfeld Theater in New York to the throwback sensibility at the center of Rust and Bone. Then again, it’s contemporary technology that allowed my number-one pick to be shot and smuggled to its Cannes premiere inside a cake. Film is changing, sure, but there’s no arguing its vividly alive. 10. Dark Horse “I know that life has been unfair to you because it has given you every possible advantage,” man-child Abe (Jordan Gelber) is told in a dream sequence, a perfect encapsulation of an existence spent in paralyzing, frustrated inadequacy. Both he and his eventual reluctant fiancée Miranda ( Selma Blair ) are in their thirties and living with their parents in New Jersey, crushed by their inability to prove themselves to be as special in adulthood as they’d always been as children. Todd Solondz doesn’t mock his ridiculous, defensive and unhappy protagonist with the same mercilessness that he used to skewer his back catalog of memorable losers, but he doesn’t allow Abe to be lovable or cuddly either. He’s inherited a dissatisfaction that has kept him caught between entitlement and self-loathing, and stands alone as a marvelously drawn and tragic figure of toxic ingrained American aspirations. 9. The Cabin in the Woods It’s an ingeniously geeky and loving deconstruction of the horror genre. It’s a meta-critique of what we want from slasher flicks and why we enjoy them. It’s a reworking of and an explanation for the silliest recurring habits of scary movie victims, and it’s also, somehow, a workplace comedy. Mostly, though, Drew Goddard and Joss Whedon’s clever, clever film was maybe the best time you could have had in cineplexes this year. It was rewarding both as a reference-laden (bloody) valentine to hardcore film fans and a rollicking standalone feature that offered up far-from-disposable characters and an elaborate high-tech system to explain why they ended up running from baddies in the woods.
If, like me you’re horribly old and ready to be sent by the farmer to the local dog food factory, you might remember a 1981 science fiction book called ‘ After Man: A Zoology of The Future ,’ by Dougal Dixon. Now sadly out of print (I still have a battered copy with a half-torn cover, because bragging rights), it featured fantastic naturalist illustrations of creatures extrapolated, evolutionarily, from modern fauna 50 million years after humanity had gone extinct. Wolf-like beasts descended from rats and ungulates descended from rabbits are the least weird creatures you’ll see, and it’s a crime no one has ever seen fit to make a half-decent movie based on concepts from the book. We’ll have to wait much longer for that, but based on the new international trailer, we can at least see something of the book’s influence on M. Knight Shyamalan’s next film, After Earth . The Will Smith and Jaden Smith-starring sci fi movie concerns the adventures of “legendary general” Cypher Raige* (Will) who, along with his young son Kitai (Jaden) crash land on planet Earth a thousand years after humanity abandoned it and moved out into the stars. Critically injured in the crash, the General is in desperate need of help; now Kitai must venture out alone into a completely re-forested home-world teeming with creatures, so we’re told in the trailer, that have all evolved to kill human beings. The glimpse of what looks like slightly evolved baboons is promising, and I’m actually shocked to admit this thing looks good. Shyamalan has not earned any benefit of the doubt, however, and I am confident that by film’s end we’ll be treated to some kind of clunky twist. Maybe it’ll turn out that they’re on the Planet of the Apes and that Jaden is actually Cypher’s father. Here’s the trailer. Let us know what you think in comments. * Dear science fiction filmmakers: please, dear god, please stop with the ridiculous naming conventions. Ross Lincoln is a LA-based freelance writer from Oklahoma with an unhealthy obsession with comics, movies, video games, ancient history, Gore Vidal, and wine. Follow him on twitter Follow Movieline on Twitter .
Is it possible Kate Upton gets hotter by the day? The Sports Illustrated stunner seems to be trying her best, flaunting her ridiculous curves and gorgeous face in a video shoot for Vogue Germany’s December issue. We’ll stop rambling and just let you watch it. Kate Upton Vogue Germany Shoot The black-and-white video, titled “It Had to Be You” and set to Frank Sinatra’s classic song by that name, features the 20-year-old showing off a variety of fashions. Try not to drool too blatantly during the horseback riding scenes, or get too jealous when a lingerie-clad Kate gets flirty and frisky with that guy on a hay bale. We’d forgive you in either case, honestly. Click here for more Kate Upton videos !
Kendall Jenner ‘s at it again — this time, here she is at the red carpet for some book launch. I know she’s a “model,” but don’t forget, she’s also a teenager. So just move along before you get in trouble. Otherwise, you’ll have plenty of time to read this book in jail. » view all 17 photos Related Articles: Kendall Jenner Donkey Riding Bikini Pics Kendall Jenner Bikini Photoshoot Kendall Jenner Is Getting Inappropriate Kendall Jenner’s Inappropriate Short Shorts Photos: WENN.com
I’ve gotta say, I’m digging Australian model Nicole Trunfio these days. I was gonna look her up to try to find out more about her, but then I realized, this girl looks awesome in a bikini — what more do we really need to know? Her major in college? Her stance on the economy? How about that her bathing suit seems to be working its way up her booty ? Now that deserves a full-blown investigation. I’ll get my magnifying glass. » view all 15 photos Related Articles: Kat Graham’s Ridiculous Bikini Kat Graham Is A Sexy Hooker Sophie Turner’s Behind Does Some Shopping Sophie Turner’s Curves Are Awesome Photos: PacificCoastNews
Doctor Cleared Of Negligence After Pregnant Woman Catches On Fire During C-Section A jury has decided that a New York doctor was not to blame for a pregnant woman catching on fire while he was performing a c-section to deliver her baby. via Fox News A jury has decided that a Syracuse doctor isn’t to blame for an operating-room mishap that caused a pregnant woman to catch fire during a cesarean section delivery. Kira Reed suffered a 7-inch-long burn on her side two years ago when an alcohol-based antiseptic applied to her skin was accidentally ignited by a medical device. The fire was out quickly and her baby was fine, but she sued over the injury. Reed reached an out-of-court settlement with the hospital, but The Post-Standard of Syracuse reports that a jury rejected a negligence claim this week against obstetrician Stephen Brown. Wow. Well at least she was compensated in some way for this ridiculous incident. How horrific that must have been for the woman in labor! Image via Shuttertock
I don’t know much about Kelli Hutcherson , but after looking at these pictures, I definitely want to get to know her better. Apparently Kelli’s an MMA ring girl, which means she essentially has to look good in a bikini while holding up a giant card. I bet her arms get tired. Poor girl needs a rest. She shouldn’t have to strain herself by holding up her boobs too . Kelli, let me get those for you. » view all 11 photos Related Articles: Kat Graham’s Ridiculous Bikini Kat Graham Is A Sexy Hooker Sophie Turner’s Behind Does Some Shopping Sophie Turner’s Curves Are Awesome Photos: PacificCoastNews
This ridiculous story hit a couple of days ago, I probably linked it but didn’t bother doing a post on it, cuz swimmer bitches, despite my hatred of fat chicks and my preferring a fit bitch, are built too fucking weird for me….all hipless in Seattle, RIP Nora Ephron….and broad shouldered But I started seeing people in the media freak out about this Olympic swimmer you’ve probably otherwise never heard posting a pic of her in a fucking bikini….a fucking bikini…and she is a pro swimmer, not fat…what the fuck…. I can only assume people were just digging for an angle, or maybe the Russians are behind it, because it’s not like she posting pics of her with 5 black cocks in her farting cum out of her asshole onto kittens or some shit….It’s just a fucking bikini….. People are idiots.
