Remember Carleigh O’Connell? The 14-year old who responded to bullying by her classmates by posing for a Facebook photo alongside the insulting piece of graffiti left for her by said classmates? Now it’s time to meet Tanis Jex-Blake – and to be equally inspired. This mother of five was suntanning at Alberta Beach in Edmonton on Tuesday, wearing a two-piece for the first time since giving birth to her first child in 2001. While trying to relax, she overheard people referring to her as “nasty” and “disgusting” and then opened her eyes to see two men and one woman pointing at her stretch mark-filled stomach. Jex-Blake says she quickly left, broke down in the car ride home, but then decided to stand up for herself on Facebook. “I’m sorry if my first attempt at sun tanning in a bikini in public in 13 years ‘grossed you out’. I’m sorry that my stomach isn’t flat and tight. I’m sorry that my belly is covered in stretch marks,” she wrote alongside the photos above. Added Tanis: “I’m NOT sorry that my body has housed, grown, protected, birthed and nurtured FIVE fabulous, healthy, intelligent and wonderful human beings. I’m sorry if my 33 year old, 125 lb body offended you so much that you felt that pointing, laughing, and pretending to kick me.” The 33-year old says she didn’t know how folks would respond to her post, but concluded: “I’ll have you know that as I looked at your ‘perfect’ young bodies, I could only think to myself ‘what great and amazing feat has YOUR body done?’. I’ll also have you know that I held my head high, unflinching as you mocked me, pretending that what you said and did had no effect on me; but I cried in the car on the drive home. “I can only hope that one day you’ll realize that my battle scars are something to be proud of, not ashamed of.” A local radio station shared Jex-Blake’s pictures and story online and she has been shocked/flattered by the outcry of support she’s received. Wrote one man, for example: “My wife has four kids… and we call her stretch marks ‘love stories’. It’s beautiful! Real men appreciate those stretch marks.” Let’s hope the lame, fake men out there take note and change their attitude. 11 Signs You’re a Parent 1. Potty Time What is it about going to the bathroom that acts as a Bat Signal for children, alarming them to your whereabouts and begging them to be your audience whilst you do your business?
Lizzie Rovsek and Tamra Barney are in the midst of an epic feud that extends beyond what fans saw on The Real Housewives of Orange County Monday. After Barney inadvertently (or intentionally) blasted Rovsek’s phone number to the world in the midst of their ongoing beef, she issued an apology. One which Lizzie will not be accepting. Amid reports that Bravo fired Tamra Barney from The Real Housewives of Orange County , she’s been hitting back at what she feels is unflattering editing. Tamra claims that she didn’t flake on a party for Lizzie ( Rovsek is also being fired from the show, reports say), but rather had to miss it because her daughter was sick. Barney already blasted Bravo for this, but when she took to social media to share a text that proved Rovsek was creating drama, she included her co-star’s digits. “It was never my intention to expose Lizzie’s phone number and it was deleted in seconds after I realized her number was attached,” explains Tamra. Given her track record this season, is anyone out there buying that? “I had deleted Lizzie number after the reunion. Therefore her previous text messages came up by her phone number. I feel horrible and very sorry that it happened.” “I even tried to call her immediately to let her know,” she insists. True? Untrue? Is Tamra genuinely sorry or just spewing B.S. Either way, Rovsek is not buying it after she says she got so many calls and texts after Barney’s post went up that she had to change her number. But not before posting the following quote on Facebook: “The liar was the hottest to defend his veracity, the coward his courage, the ill-bred his gentlemanliness, and the cad his honour.” Oooh, that’s gotta hurt, Tam. Burrrrrrrrrn . All the behind-the-scenes drama may not matter much longer if these two are really getting the heave-ho … but it should make for one heck of a reunion show. Real Housewives: Before They Were Reality Stars! 1. Tamra Barney: Before The Real Housewives OCs Tamra was quite the bodacious bikini babe. Still is!
Yesterday, Tamra Barney attempted to save face with The Real Housewives of Orange County fans by writing a lengthy Facebook post defending her actions in the previous night’s episode. Tamra claimed producers on the show convinced her to ditch Lizzie Rovsek’s birthday party at the last minute without providing any details. Barney says her daughter was ill and she’d intended to give Lizzie plenty of advance notice, but Bravo wanted the drama of a last-minute flake-out. Today, Radar Online has obtained texts sent from Lizzie to Tamra revealing that Rovsek thinks Barney skipped the celebration because she felt like it. Worse, Tamra stands accused of convincing Vicki Gunvalson to fake a yeast infection in order to giver her an excuse to stay home. “I honestly wouldn’t have cared if you just didn’t want to go,” Lizzie texted. “The general vibe I got from everyone, producers included, was that you just didn’t want to be there.” Then Lizzie pulls out the big guns, and accuses Tamra of a totally gross violation of girl code: “The whole yeast infection thing you told Vivki to tell producers wasn’t very nice.” Not very nice, indeed. Did she have to go with s uch a TMI excuse? It was bad enough that Tamra told everyone about her bedroom quirks . (The conversation involved her ear canal. Enough said.) Watch The Real Housewives of Orange County online to find out more than you ever wanted to know about Tamra and company’s fetishes and infections. Real Housewives: Before They Were Reality Stars! 1. Tamra Barney: Before The Real Housewives OCs Tamra was quite the bodacious bikini babe. Still is!
Tamra Barney is unafraid to dish it out online, or on TV, or in person, but a recent f-bomb she dropped on Gretchen Rossi’s fiance might have taken it too far. The Real Housewives of Orange County star, who is current embroiled in a vicious custody battle with her ex-husband Simon Barney, got fired up on Twitter. When a fan suggested she was a hypocrite for criticizing Gretchen Rossi and Slade Smiley while dealing with her own family issues, Tamra went OFF. Bridgette Ramirez wrote on the social media site: “@TamraBarney Would Talk About @SladeSmiley ALL The Time, But Now That Roles Are Reversed … She DOESN’T Like It! @GretchenRossi #Karma” The mother of four snapped back unabashedly: “Oh plz. That f–ker is a deadbeat with a sick son. Keep supporting him, it makes you look Real good!” Tamra Barney to Gretchen Rossi: You Nasty B!tch The Tweet was quickly deleted … but ouch. Smiley’s ex-wife took him to court multiple times in an effort to make the Bravo star pay for the medical treatment of his young son, who was diagnosed with cancer. However, if you watch The Real Housewives of Orange County online , you saw Slade make a real effort to get out of debt and be there for his son last season. For that reason more than her own situation, Tamra Barney may have gone too far with that Tweet, no matter what bad blood exists between herself and Gretchen. Do you agree? Sound off below … Real Housewives: Before They Were Reality Stars! 1. Tamra Barney: Before The Real Housewives OCs Tamra was quite the bodacious bikini babe. Still is!
Viva Barcelona! Desiree and the men are in Spain, where there’s sure to be a whole lot of bull, if you know what we mean. Will Drew and Kasey’s plan cause Desiree to send James home? Or will they find themselves rose-less? You can just go read The Bachelorette spoilers or play along with our THG +/- review system! Desiree Hartsock loves everything about Barcelona, especially the churches, and says it’s the perfect place to fall in love. She’s hopeful that she’ll fall “completely,” which is better than halfway? Fresh off of helping Ben get ousted, Michael has jumped on the Anti-James Train. It’s pretty ridiculous. Minus 5 . Drew gets the first solo date card, his first solo date with Desiree. He doesn’t plan to address the situation with James unless there’s time for it. Something tells me there will be time for it. Desiree says that her relationship with Drew has moved more slowly but they’re friends, which is a great basis for a relationship. He jumps right into kissing her and gets that out of the way probably in hopes of keeping himself out of the dreaded Friend Zone. And then he just keeps kissing her every chance he gets because he’s so “crazy” about her. Drew’s hero is his dad who is a recovered alcoholic. He gets a little teary when he tells her about his dad and she gets goosebumps hearing the story. P lus 4 . Desiree says she just trusts Drew. But he hasn’t tattled on James yet, so there’s that. At dinner, she thanks him for opening up to her and he says he’s overcome with emotions which are running crazy. He ushers her away from the dinner table and they try to outrun the cameras for a heated make-out session against a wall in an alley. Plus 40 because HOT. Desiree calls Drew strong and emotional and says he has many of the qualities she’s looking for and then gives him a rose. And then he ruins the moment by telling her about James. Minus 40 because buzzkill. The next day, Drew fills Kasey and Michael in on his conversation with Desiree. Kasey is worried about balancing his feelings for Desiree with what he knows about James. Michael’s worried about his sweatband but has a list of questions ready for cross-examination, I’m sure. Juan Pablo is in his element on the group date, which is a soccer match against one of Spain’s womens’ teams. The guys seem to think they’ll have this game in the bag and completely discount the girls’ ability to play soccer. The trash talking is ridiculous. But not as ridiculous as James “playing” goalie. Dear James, GOALIE. Not GOALPOST. Don’t just stand there! MOVE. Minus 8 At the group date cocktail party, Kasey’s ready to confront James. All the guys are ready to confront James. Except Chris who goes with Desiree to her room where she tells him how athletic he is and then reads him a poem she wrote. Barf. Minus 2 . Chris and Des apparently have their own love scale. Kasey and Michael decide to confront James while Des spends time with Juan Pablo. They ambush him and ask him about his statements that if he made the final four, he could become the next bachelor. He’s shocked. Either because they think he said this or because they know he said it. While that’s happening, Brooks and Des talk about how they’re emotionally invested and in a good space. He’s glad he’s not downstairs for the conversation with James. Since part of me is Team Brooks, I’m also glad he’s not downstairs. Plus 7 Michael jumps into Attorney Mode and James starts yelling. Chris tries to shush them and it doesn’t work. James starts wagging his finger around and denies what Kasey and Drew heard. Vehemently denies. Minus 5 Michael says he sounds like he’s auditioning for the Jersey Shore. James leaves the room. Desiree asks James to stay behind and talk to her and tells all of the guys that she’s not handing out a rose to anyone but she’ll walk them out. Plus 3 for being a good hostess. She feels “blindsided” and decides to grab the bull by his horns to get her answers. He tries to interrupt and she just keeps talking. He tries to put everything on Mikey T. He puts everything on the guys and says they’re only trying to ruin what he and Desiree has because they’re jealous of his connection with her. He starts to cry. She starts to cry. He says it’s tough. She says it’s tough. She needs the night to process and he’s emotionally exhausted. And now I’m exhausted watching the faux-drama unfold. Minus 10 . Michael’s still wearing his Attorney cape while they sit around talking about James as James is riding up in the elevator. They didn’t expect him to walk back in the door. The next morning, James is sitting on the roof all by himself and Zak is preparing himself for his one-on-one date with Desiree. She’s feeling depressed, which means Zak is the perfect guy to go on a date with today. He’s always happy. Plus 10 . They’re going to spend the day doing “artistic” things. So descriptive. They take a sketch class and end up drawing each other. He apparently studied at the Picasso school of Des drawings but it makes her laugh. Plus 12. Their second model is male. And nude. And Des says “I feel like I do heads bigger than they’re supposed to be.” And THAT is the line of the night. Plus 15 . And let’s go ahead and give Zak another Plus 25 for those excellent faces when the model dropped trou. He gets another plus 20 for dropping his OWN trou to make her laugh even more. Zak and Des eat dinner in a cave. It’s actually a wine cellar, but it’s also kind of a cave. He wants a relationship just like his parents have. They’ve been married for over 30 years. But he also wants to continue to experience adventures. He believes his need to explore is why he’s still single. His joy and infectious spirit gets him the date rose. Plus 4. They make out in the pathway that leads back out of the cave. Back at the suite, James asks to speak to Drew. James keeps saying that what he said was that if he made it to the top four and Des cuts him, the worst thing that could happen to him would be that he becomes the next bachelor. Uhhh, James? I’d say the worst thing that could happen to you is that you go home and continue to live a life of obscurity and no one ever knows you were ever on this silly show, but hey, I understand words and apparently you don’t. Drew tells him that even having that thought means that he’s not really here for Des, and while I don’t necessarily agree with Drew, I don’t think James is really here for Des. So. All of the guys except James are sitting around chatting and James walks in. He sits next between Juan Pablo and Michael on the couch and Michael bristles. Brooks scoots over to give Michael a little more room. Minus 5 Des shows up and takes James out to finish their chat from the night of the group date. She believes she needs to send him home but also believes they had something and needs to talk to him about it. Go with your gut, Des. Go with your gut. He talks non-stop for what feels like an eternity and says she’s beautiful and he’s there to fall in love with her and all she hears is everything he’s had an entire day to rehearse. He says this has been hard and he feels more alive than he has and she starts to cry. He does the man thing and says “please don’t cry.” BECAUSE THAT WORKS, DUDE. Minus 8 They start to laugh and she leans into him and they’re sort of snuggling and all the wind is sucked out of Drew’s sails as he sees it. Chris asks James what he and Des talked about like he doesn’t already know. James laughs and says “exactly the situation that occurred.” Except, you know, probably not exactly. Chris is not happy at all. Not at all. You know the two coming out of this smelling like, uh, roses? Juan Pablo and Zak. The two of them have said nada about this entire situation. Plus 9 . Finally, it’s time for the rose ceremony. Finally. No cocktail party. Just straight to the good part. Zak and Drew both received roses on their one-on-one dates. Joining them to continue on to the next leg of this journey are: Chris Brooks Michael And with that, Kasey, Juan Pablo, and James head back to reality. Juan Pablo thought he and Des had a connection and he’s sad. There are legitimate tears. Drew and Michael are more excited about the fact that James is gone than they are anything else and Michael actually says “case dismissed.” Michael, Des? Really? Weird. EPISODE TOTAL: +66 SEASON TOTAL: +326
The third time’s the charm for Tamra Barney! She has the groom. She has the bling. And if the ladies have anything to do with it, she’ll have the dress, too. And Vicki will get some shocking news about Brooks thanks to Lauri, who went away to marry George but has come back again to start trouble because apparently her new life was boring. Silly housewife. Let’s catch up with them now with our THG +/- recap! Tamra meets Eddie at what will eventually, hopefully, maybe be their fitness studio. He’s set up a candlelight dinner on a card table. How romantic! Plus 8. They were supposed to be open weeks ago and there’s still no floor. Eddie’s so not interested in hearing Tamra talk about her Spanx. So not. Fake it, Eddie. Fake it. He asks about the Alexis-Gretchen drama and about Gretchen backing out of dress shopping and says that Gretchen’s being childish. Really, Gretchen’s just being a friend and knows that if she goes she might fight with Alexis and doesn’t want that for Tamra. Plus 3. Heather has another table read! She’s going to read for a guest starring role on Malibu Country . Terry was excited when he heard this time and didn’t crack a joke! Hooray, Terry! You really can teach an old dog new tricks! Plus 5 . Lauri and Vicki show up at Tamra’s and they’ve brought coffee. Lauri thinks it’s funny that Tamra’s getting married for a third time when Tamra cracked jokes about Lauri’s third wedding. Tamra’s previous wedding dresses were maternity dresses. The fact that this one isn’t is a big deal. Plus 8. Lydia believes that “marriage is forever” and says that about Tamra’s pending wedding to Eddie. Except this is Tamra’s third wedding. This one will totally stick! The ladies in the limo discuss Cheeseburger-gate and Slade. Lydia’s not a fan of him at all and calls him a 12-year-old tool. Eh, Plus 12. Gretchen wears her engagement ring from Jeff and Lydia sees it immediately upon Gretchen getting into the limo. Vicki thinks it’s Gretchen’s way of upstaging Tamra. It’s a ring, Vicki. That’s it. Heather and Alexis are at the bridal store when the limo arrives. They’re more than just cordial. They’re nearly chipper. Plus 3 Tamra wants to plan her wedding around the dress. The men helping her try on dresses have nothing but dollar signs in their eyes. Gretchen’s kind of stand-offish because she doesn’t want a repeat of the ladies’ night at the gym to happen in the bridal shop. She’s the only one who seems to be thinking about that. Heather pops the cork on a bottle of champs and Tamra comes out in the first dress. While she’s changing into the second one, Vicki tells Alexis that Gretchen wasn’t coming at first because Alexis was coming. Minus 12. Tamra stood up for Alexis, though, so Alexis plans to thank Tamra for that. She’s so done with Gretchen. So done. Alexis follows Tamra into the dressing room so she can thank her for the invitation. Tamra says that she wanted Alexis there and so she was there. Then in an interview, Alexis delivers the best line of the night. About Gretchen: “When it comes to Gretchen and I, I just wish sometimes Gretchen would eat some of her own makeup so she could become pretty on the inside again.” After Alexis leaves, Lauri says it might be Gretchen next time and Lydia says it might be Vicki. Vicki says it won’t be her. She and Brooks went to dinner and ended everything. His love language is quality time and Vicki can’t give him that since he’s not welcome in her home while Briana and Troy are living there. Lauri says Briana and Michael must have an intuition kicking in and she wants to talk to Vicki at some point. And then she just launches into the information she has about Brooks. Minus 26. He’s dating Lauri’s daughter’s friend. Where dating means probably having sex. With a 21 year old. A 21 year old is probably having sex with Brooks. All the bleach in the entire United States isn’t enough to purge the image of Brooks having sex with anyone from my brain. But a 21 year old?? Minus 75. I have a major case of the heebie jeebies right now. And the dry heaves. Lauri doesn’t have any concrete evidence about the probably sex. She just knows he met the girl at a poker party and he was throwing Benjamins at her. Probably Vicki’s Benjamins . Minus 14. Vicki’s kind of devastated because she still has feelings for Brooks. (Why? He’s a disgusting leech! Who probably had sex with someone his daughter’s age!) The girl Brooks has probably had sex with has made porn videos before. And Lydia says that talking about this feels extra dirty because they’re in a room surrounded by white wedding gowns. Gretchen’s come to life now that Vicki’s been knocked down a peg and Alexis has left. When Tamra comes out in The Dress, they all start to cry a little. Heather makes a toast. Tamra says the dress costs $10,000. Yes, 4 zeroes. This one better be worth it. Tamra wants to take a picture of herself and the ladies, and Vicki has to walk away and cry for a minute. She can’t get herself together. Lydia and Lauri go to console her and Lauri says she feels like she’s always the messenger. Well, Lauri, that’s because so far you are. Minus 8 . After shopping, the ladies head to dinner. Tamra finds out that Brooks broke up with Vicki. Then Lauri fills her in on the probably sex Brooks probably had with an under 21 year old girl. Heather asks if Vicki really needed to know the information. Lauri would want to know. Lydia says she would want to know. Heather wouldn’t want to know. Vicki comes back to the table and they order tequila. Plus 9. After a visit from the chefs, Heather tells the ladies about her possible recurring guest-starring role on Malibu Country and Lydia says she’s gone from “Fancy Pants” to “Fancy Outfit.” Gretchen told Tamra that she had been offered a spot on Malibu Country and Heather says that the casting director denied ever offering Gretchen anything of the sort. Oops? Tamra’s pissed about catching Gretchen in this lie. Heather says there’s a chance she’s colossally confused, but Vicki calls her a liar about half a dozen times. Lydia feels squicky talking about Gretchen when Gretchen isn’t there and Lauri feels like this is a giant case of pot meeting kettle for Vicki given all the lies she’s told. Tamra’s also upset that she opened up to Gretchen about her life and now Gretchen’s lying to her. Bad form, Gretchen. Bad form. EPISODE TOTAL: -87 SEASON TOTAL: -190
When the women of The Real Housewives of Orange County party, they party . Or at least Vicki does. And she drags Tamra and Lydia along on her whoop-it-up spree. Gretchen doesn’t like it. Things are heating up with the women south of the border! Let’s recap it now with our THG +/- review! Vicki, Tamra, and Lydia finally arrive at Andale’s. Now maybe Vicki will shut up about whooping it up at Andale’s. Maybe. (Probably not.) Gretchen and Heather are in the back of the limo waiting for the end of the bathroom trip of eternity. Gretchen starts telling Heather the tales Laurie told her about Vicki and Heather doesn’t want to hear it. Plus 2 . They get out of the limo and into a cab to go back to the resort. Tamra hails her own cab by dancing on top of one and declaring that there’s no better woman to party with than Vicki Gunvalson. In the limo, Lydia and Tamra tell Vicki they’re blaming her for ditching Heather and Gretchen. Then there’s talk of bunions. Minus 8 . The three of them go in to Heather’s room to apologize but Heather’s not having it. Neither is Gretchen. Tamra can’t stop laughing which just makes Gretchen and Heather more angry. She asks Tamra how Tamra could just run off like that and Tamra points at Vicki. Buzz kill. Minus 20. But they kind of deserved it for ditching the girls. Back in Tamra’s room, Vicki laughs that her “plan” worked! And then she pees Tamra’s bed. Minus 50. May clearer heads–and cleaner sheets–prevail the next day. The ladies meet in the lobby and plan to go see the town. Gretchen thanks Vicki for showing up at their rendezvous and Vicki keeps walking right out the door and straight to the limo. Minus 12 . Heather and Lydia decide to skip the penis straws in their mimosas. Lydia asks if they’re all good about last night. Heather says she’s not happy and was embarrassed and everything felt really sad. But she’s trying to move on in the spirit of having a good weekend. Plus 10 . After watching a baby bull fight a matador, the women have regrouped themselves in the limo. Lydia, Vicki, and Tamra on one end and Heather and Gretchen on another. The trio recounts their fun from the following night and Heather chimes in that they didn’t get that fun, so that’s a bummer for them. There’s cat fighting in the limo and Lydia calls Gretchen “negative.” With the desire for everything to be so positive all the time are we sure Lydia doesn’t take hits of her mom’s bong when Grandma’s not looking? Gretchen starts to cry and Tamra tries to console her. Then Vicki gets angry. Minus 6. Once they’re back at the resort, Vicki and Lydia head down to sit by the pool. Tamra and Heather join them and Gretchen follows shortly after bearing gifts. Plus 10 . Vicki mocks the fact that there are Gretchen Christine products in their goodie bags. When tension rises between Gretchen and Vicki, Tamra tries to break it by telling them all about Vicki peeing her bed. “I leaked. I’m gonna own it,” says Vicki. And then she says that we’ve all done it at least once in our lives. Ummmm…moving on. Tamra asks Gretchen to go take a walk with her and Vicki starts in on how Gretchen is the reason she and Tamra aren’t close friends anymore. Every word out of Vicki’s mouth drips with disdain for Gretchen. She’s condescending and rude and Gretchen does an excellent job of keeping her cool. Plus 5 to Gretchen for that. Minus 20 to Vicki for being a raging lunatic. Tamra tells Gretchen about Vicki’s “my plan worked” comment and then the camera flashes back to Vicki and Lydia talking. Vicki thinks that Gretchen should look to her as a mentor. HAHAHAHHAHAHA. Minus 10 . Back on the beach, Gretchen asks Tamra why she pushes people away when they get close to her. Tamra starts to cry and tells Gretchen about her newfound revelation that feelings are okay. Tamra gravitates to people like Tamra because they don’t “get deep.” They don’t make her confront herself. Team Gretchen. Back in OC, Alexis and Jim go to dinner. She’s not jealous of the other women who are whooping it up in Mexico, but she’s totally jealous. Minus 4 Lydia called her and doesn’t know what to do about the strippers who are coming to play later. Jim shuts down conversation about the women and asks to be left out of it. So Alexis says she wants to have another baby. Jim says they can talk about it again in 5 years. She counters with 6 months. Then she says the dumbest thing she’s said all season: “You may be faster, but I will outrun you. You know what that means?” No, Alexis, just like Jim, NONE OF US know what that means. Minus 10. And Minus 10 more for making us think about you and Jim doing the dirty. Gretchen has decked out their resort suite for Tamra’s night. She’s also vowed to have fun with Vicki for Tamra’s sake. After a quick cocktail, Tamra opens a present and then dinner is served. Strangest revelation of the night is that Lydia shops at Victoria’s Secret. Heather shops at…I’m not sure where she shops. But she bought Tamra a diamond-studded whip. And a pregnancy test. And hand sanitizer. And latex gloves. Plus 12. And Vicki buys her the largest dildo ever. Once dinner winds down a bit, Lydia excuses herself to go and call Doug. She doesn’t want to see the strippers Gretchen has hired to tantalize Tamra. Except they don’t tantalize so much as nearly violate her. It’s not exactly clear if Gretchen hired strippers or prostitutes. But hey, fun was had by all, I guess. Plus 5. Just for funsies, here’s Heather’s face while the Magic Mikes were doing their, uh, Tamra, Gretchen, and Vicki. Safety first! Lydia joins the girls for breakfast the next morning and Tamra doesn’t quite understand why she could dance on a bar but not stay for the strippers. Me either, Tamra. Oh well. Until next time… EPISODE TOTAL: -106 SEASON TOTAL: -32
Tonight on The Real Housewives of Orange County , Gretchen plans a bachelorette party for Tamra. Even though Tamra and Eddie haven’t set a date and have no plans to get married other than a ring? Whatever. It’s a vacation and there’s booze. That means there’s bound to be some fun. We’re recapping it all with our THG +/- review! After Tamra’s tearful conversation with her mom last week, she’s ready to turn over a new, less-angry leaf. Lydia comes over for lemonade and a snack. She also hopes to broker peace between Tamra and Alexis. Lydia calls herself the “friendship whisperer” and says that this is all part of her master plan. Master plan for what, Lydia?? Maybe you should hit up your mom’s house and bring along a bit of her stash for this. Minus 8 . Gretchen and Heather get together to plan Tamra’s bachelorette party. They’re designing a custom swimsuit for Tamra for the trip, but they’re having trouble agreeing. On anything. Minus 4 . Heather wants an art gallery and a spay day and shopping. Gretchen wants strippers. Unclutch your pearls, Heather. Let Gretchen win this one. Vicki and Alexis meet for drinks and Vicki’s nervous about going because of Tamra and Gretchen’s friendship. Alexis is a little shocked about Tamra’s phone call inviting her to lunch. She’s optimistic that Tamra can’t hang on to the anger forever. Vicki, enough with “the bracelet thing.” Enough. Jealousy doesn’t look good on you. Minus 12 . Lydia and Alexis meet up with Tamra for lunch. Tamra’s a glass of wine in before they get there, in hopes of calming her nerves. There’s an awkward hug. And then an awkward silence. And then an awkward Lydia. Tamra says she wants to break the cycle of hurting for Alexis. She wants to take some time to get to know Alexis without the outside influence of the other ladies first. Way to go, Tamra! Plus 50 . Gretchen goes to meet Lauri and her horse. Slade and Lauri used to “date.” And by date we mean sleep together. Talk turns to Vicki and Gretchen says Vicki’s one of the most hypocritical people she’s ever met in her life. Lauri heard about all of that. And then some. Apparently Vicki cheated on Don. A lot. With men. And women. And apparently she has a thing for men with bad teeth. Gretchen’s honest when she tells Lauri she’s going to have a hard time keeping all of these secrets. Once they get to Mexico and the alcohol starts to flow? No way those bodies are staying buried. Heather’s packing for Mexico and tells Terry there will be a stripper. She’s never seen a stripper. Terry doesn’t count. I’m so glad they’re back! Plus 8 . Lydia’s never been on a bachelorette trip and doesn’t know how many pairs of shoes she needs to bring for two nights. She’s also never seen a stripper and Doug’s not nearly as nice about the stripper thing as Terry was, which is surprising considering he was so okay with Grandma’s pot smoking ways. Gretchen has an entire suitcase’ worth of bachelorette party paraphernalia and that’s not even including the penis stuff. Plus 20. It’s B-day!! The ladies start to arrive at the airport to head to Mexico and Vicki’s got a sash for Tamra. Because apparently she doesn’t think Gretchen would’ve through of that. Quote of the night goes to Vicki: “This is a bachelorette party. She can drink out of more than one penis cup.” Plus 10 . Telling Tamra that they’re going to Mexico was slightly underwhelming. I’m not sure they got the reaction from her that they’d hoped to get. Vicki’s about to lose points for overuse of the word “whoop.” And I’m not even going to mention that move with the lollipop. At least not with words. The girls get changed and head to dinner. Vicki wants to party the whole time they’re in Mexico. Tamra wants to spend the first night sleeping. She’s too old to drink two nights in a row. Lydia asks if they can have chips and salsa. This is not that kind of restaurant. Minus 10 Gretchen looks a bit perturbed. Which makes Heather perturbed. Vicki wants to go to Andale’s. Heather wants to go to bed. So does Tamra. Lydia wants everyone to eat some shrimp! Vicki pulls Lydia and Tamra off on a walking tour of Puerto Vallarta leaving Heather and Gretchen on their own. Bad form, Vicki. Bad form. Minus 5 . Heather and Gretchen have been waiting in the limo for 20 minutes thinking that Vicki, Tamra, and Lydia are still in the restroom. But no. They’re off buying light-up hairbows. Vicki’s evil plan to steal Tamra away from Gretchen seems to be working. Hold up. Best quote of the night goes to Gretchen. “I want to unleash a wrath of ‘furry’ on this girl.” I mean, when in Mexico, right?? EPISODE TOTAL: +49 SEASON TOTAL: +74
Tonight on The Real Housewives of Orange County , the gang travels to L.A. to watch Heather’s taping of Hot In Cleveland. Are Vicki and Tamra close to a truce? What does Gretchen think? Find out all of that and more as we break down tonight’s episode with our THG +/- review! At Casa Dubrow, Heather’s heading to work on the set of Hot In Cleveland . Terry’s stepping it up to help her out. Way to go, Terry! Plus 10 . Tamra stops in at a jewelry store to look for wedding bands for Eddie. Her plan is to get the ball rolling so he’ll follow suit. Her friend Lauri stops in to help her shop. The jeweler pours a glass of champagne to “loosen her up.” Pretty sure it didn’t take champagne. Lauri tells Tamra that her goal after marrying her husband George was to blend their family. Then she invokes She Who Will Not Be Named (Vicki) and Tamra tells Lauri all about how she was the only one who stood by Vicki and all the drama with Brooks. Apparently Vicki breached confidences between Tamra and Simon and broke girl code. Minus 5 . At Chez McLaughlin, Lydia’s mom walks across the street to visit. They look at photos from Lydia’s childhood and Lydia’s mom says she’s had some “human lapses.” Glittermama’s still smoking up. Lydia feels like her mom is choosing pot over her but mom just likes to get baked and run with the bunnies. On the set of Hot In Cleveland , Heather has a table read with Betty White, Valerie Bertinelli, and Wendi Malick. The table read goes well and Heather gets the laughs. Plus 5 . While Heather was at her table read, Alexis visited an acting school. After playing a news anchor on General Hospital , she’s convinced she knows everything about being an actor. She’s so uncomfortable when she’s nervous. And she was incredibly nervous. Terry’s home with the kids and calls himself “very permissive.” But he’s handling it. Plus 8 The following morning, Terry makes coffee and gets the kids out the door for Heather. Plus 10 . Slade and Gretchen are checking out of a hotel in San Diego aftet taking a little trip for Gretchen’s birthday. Instead of just whisking her away for a weekend, he also surprises her with a Rolls Royce. Except she sort of bought the car for herself with the help of their financial advisor. So, happy birthday? In the limo on the way to Heather’s taping, Lydia and Tamra talk about Lydia’s mom. Tamra doesn’t crack any inappropriate jokes or tell Lydia to lighten up. Plus 2. While everyone else heads to Heather’s taping, Alexis heads to her first acting class. In her one-on-one she says she’s excited. But her excitement looks a lot like nerves. She says acting comes naturally for her. She would be wrong. Minus 12 . Tamra finds out the taping might last from 5:00 p.m. until midnight and suddenly regrets her decision to tag along. She especially regrets it when she finds she’s seated one seat away from Vicki. Gretchen and Slade aren’t there yet and Heather knows it. Minus 15 . Lydia’s very complimentary of Heather’s acting, as is Vicki. Heather’s rocking it! Plus 7 . Finally, Gretchen and Slade show up, but as soon as they’re seated, they leave again to look at something on Slade’s phone. They sneak back in just in time for Heather’s awesome line “I’ll cut you like bad bangs, bitch!” After acting again, Heather feels like the pieces of her puzzle are in place. Plus 12 . Tamra’s not impressed with the fact that Slade bought Gretchen a Rolls Royce. Vicki can’t say anything in the one-on-one except that she thinks Gretchen’s stupid. Lydia instigates a conversation between Tamra and Vicki about the way they parted at the winery. They agree to sweep it all under the rug. Gretchen’s a little miffed. Minus 8 . Terry makes a toast to Heather. He’s inspired and amazed by her. Plus 12 . EPISODE TOTAL: +26 SEASON TOTAL: -12
If there’s one thing The Real Housewives of Orange County love, it’s wine. Vicki and Tamra launched Wines by Wives last season and now it’s time to focus on building their business. Except they’re not really friends anymore, so this should make for interesting office politics. Join us now as we break it all down with our THG +/- system! At Casa Dubrow, Terry asks the most disgusting question a husband can ask a wife. “Do you want to cut my toenails?” Minus 20 . These two are still on the outs following their dinner the night before. She tries to explain why she was hurt the night before and he just goes right on clipping his toenails. Minus 10 . Heather’s issue is that she needs support from Terry instead of jokes. Terry cracks another joke. Get it together, you two! The wine is in and Tamra checks to make sure she’s the center wife on the label. She and Eddie head out to Malibu for a little wine tasting with the girls. Tamra’s jealous of Eddie’s bike and says if there’s anyone he would ever have an affair with, it would be his bike. Vicki climbs into the limo with the Dubrows and the McLaughlins. She’s feeling like a fifth wheel as the only person on the trip without a significant other. Lydia’s kids made a get well card for Slade’s son. Super sweet. Plus 12. Tamra’s ready to do some business. Yes, they’re sampling wine, but they also need to choose new wines for their mail-order business. During the first sampling, the wine goes to Vicki’s head and she insults the winery owner by saying she thought he and his daughter were actually a couple. Minus 13. Heather asks how old the daughter is and she responds “24.” Then Vicki adds injury to insult by telling the girl she looks older than 24. Minus 7 . Jim and Alexis have a new Sky Zone opening in San Diego so she’s not on the Malibu trip. And she wasn’t invited in the first place. They’re going to the opening of their trampoline park for kids without their own kids. Back in Malibu, the group arrives at their hotel and Vicki turns on the tears and whines about the fact that she’s single. Or just there by herself, since she and Brooks are sort of dating but then not? At dinner, there’s more alcohol. Doug asks which wine they’re drinking at dinner and asks who chose it. Tamra raises her hand and Vicki gives her the Evil Eye. Talk turns to the missing dramatic element of the night: Alexis. Lydia says that Alexis misses Gretchen and Gretchen says she doesn’t believe that. To change the subject, Tamra asks Heather if she’ll get to make out with anyone on her upcoming guest role on Hot In Cleveland . Atta girl, Tamra! Way to shift the focus! Plus 8 . Terry starts cracking jokes and Heather’s demeanor changes instantly. Vicki has a new business venture that she hasn’t told Tamra about, one to which she’s focusing most of her attention. Instead of helping sell Wines by Wives, she’s peddling Vicki’s Vodka. It’s day two in Malibu and there are more wines to taste. Eddie and Slade are missing breakfast for cycling. Heather asks if Tamra and Eddie need to have a conversation about the cycling and Tamra tells her that’s an argument she’ll never win. Thus begins a conversation about marriage and compromise and pretty soon Terry spills the beans that after their dinner, he dropped the “D” word in conversation with Heather. Vicki actually gives sage advice when she says that throwing around the word “divorce” builds a wall between a married couple. Plus 10 . Heather just wants what she gives. That’s not too much to ask. Eddie and Slade arrive from their ride just in time to draw the attention away from Terry and Heather. Plus 5 . Instead of tasting and choosing wine, Vicki tries on coats. Then she needs to leave to go to dinner with friends in L.A. even though she’s supposed to be on a business trip. The best thing that could possibly happen for Vicki and Tamra at this point is for the two of them to stop being business partners. Tamra calls Vicki a bitch and Vicki calls Tamra a miserable person. Heather and Terry take a moment to talk about brunch and he apologizes. He knows he screwed up. They agree to hit the pause button on the conversation and pick it up again after she films. Briana brings Troy by Vicki’s office because that’s the only way she feels like she can see her mom. Vicki gives her side of the story about Malibu and definitely angles the conversation so she’s in a good light. Minus 8 . Tamra and Eddie go to dinner to discuss the fitness studio. Tamra has trouble balancing two businesses. She also thinks she has an anger issue given her latest outburst with Vicki. Tamra doesn’t know how to talk about emotion and has a really truthful moment with herself and Eddie about how she reacts to situations. Plus 30. EPISODE TOTAL: +7 SEASON TOTAL: -38
