Doutzen Kroes and Candice Swanepoel in bikinis…together….like this was a Victoria’s Secret shoot, but really it is on their spare time, and they are doing it for free, is like a doctor on Doctors Without Borders, or a lawyer doing pro-bono work in the ghetto, or a fucking pornstar fucking you for free. It almost doesn’t make sense, but it is a glorious experience, that feels like you may have won the fucking lottery to make it happen. I mean shit, to book these girls to do this in front of you is probably 10k each…and here they are doing it for free….amazing….especially Candice ass…my god, this is the best pic ever. TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS FOLLOW THIS LINK
Clara Alonso is a Spanish model who did the Victoria’s Secret fashion show in 2008. A Victoria’s Secret immigrant model you’ve never heard of because I guess she didn’t make the cut for their evil empire to become one of the angels, because she probably didn’t pass their insane test, or maybe she was a spy trying to crack the code that is the billion dollar, shitty quality underwear brand….but she has gone on to do lingerie campaigns for other people, and more importantly, this shoot for GQ Russia, where she’s seducing me like a mail order bride, even though she’s not from Russia…she’s just does their magazines.
Miley Cyrus released a Twerk video in a Unicorn jumpsuit last week and the world went nuts, because clearly we are all bored as fuck and don’t have much else to worry about, but also because Miley’s a bit of a tight bodied babe, from a spoiled Disney past, who during her quest to find herself and stay hip, has been hanging with rappers and spending time on the internet, learning about what the kids her age are into, like some kind of alien locked in her house, unable to interact with normals. And thank god for that, because her twerking has stuck, and she’s making it a thing, and here are more pics of her getting into the Twerk…something we’ll be seeing hundreds of girls who woulda otherwise never twerked start twerking…it’s the power of celebrity used for good. I thought twerking was done, but I guess it’s just going mainstream and I love that Miley’s mom is on this, I wouldn’t mind watching that Billy Ray Sperm eating Uterus retirement plan get down. TO SEE MORE PICS OF HER IN THIS OUTFIT LOOKING LIKE A PRISON INMATE I WOULDN’T MIND BEING PRISON RAPED BY FOLLOW THIS LINK
I remember when Leighton Meester was born in a halfway house because her mother was a criminal in jail for drug smuggling. Teaching her daughter the tricks she learned in prison to get ahead in life. Leading to Leighton’s career in foot fetish porn, before fucking her way to a TV Show, making enough money so that she doesn’t have to be a porn star like she was destined to be, or a stripper, or even a drug dealer like her mom. Taking her mom’s sacrifices and squeezing them into a pair of gym pants, a type of clothing that would even make a dude’s ass look awesome, no homo, and for some reason, I’m not so into it, and that reason is probably a hatred to porn sluts that have got away. TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS FOLLOW THIS LINk
I guess these pics of tennis star modeling her underwear line, would have been better if the underwear line was more of a lingerie line, and the tennis star was more Anna Kournikova or Maria Sharapova, because Caroline Wozniacki, may be a powerhouse of a player, and watching her grunt with her powerful swing may be sexy when playing against a more manlier girl, but she’s not one of the babes of tennis, and I think her underwear design really properly represent her sex appeal.
Here is the Ultra Music Festival – Live Stream for those of you not in Miami Raving, because you’re too busy sitting at home depressed, not getting laid, a total sad case. If you are like me, you are probably self conscious of very little….but one thing you do pay attention to is whether you are starting to lose your hair. Not that it is the end of the world, but just another strike against your already hurting life. So why not do what you can now to stop it while you can, before your male pattern baldness goes into a weird, awkward, unmanageable place…..but first you need to educate yourself. 1- What Causes Hair loss – 95% of all cases are caused by genetics….genetics that trigger your testosterone (DHT) to attack your hair follicles on your head. 2- What are the remedies available – There are prescription pills that have side effects like lower sex drive…because that’s what the pills do…they hit you where you don’t want to be hit, lowering your T-count, or your Dihydo-Testosterone count, which is the hormone causes hair loss. There is also popular hair shampoo that stimulates the hair follicle and keeps it in the “growth phase”. It also comes with side effects from unwanted hair growth in other body parts, as well as headaches and even heart palpitations….sounds awesome right? Expensive chemicals that sound horrible…. There are also natural products developed by dermatologists on the market, like REVIVOGEN that work really well in the early stages of hair loss. Meaning if you have been losing your hair slowly over the last 3-5 years, this product has been scientifically proven to stop further hair loss and even regain hair already lost…in as fast as 3 months. Doctors even recommend it. These options, like REVIVOGEN have no side effects, are all natural and work. It is definitely worth trying! Studies have shows an 85% success rate in as little as 3 months! It’s a minor investment to save your balding ass head! Quit fucking around. Save yourself. To find out more FOLLOW THIS LINK
I have no idea who Ashley SKy is, but I do know that she has fake tits, and that Terry Richardson is taking pics of her, so either he’s using her to tap into his creative porno caliber pics, or she’s actually something mainstream and this is for a magazine…but really who fucking cares why he got this tall, awesome body naked, what matters is that she is naked…but not naked enough. I need more fucking nipple to make my day complete, but I’ll take it anyway…I’m always into being introduced to new girls I can try to masturbate to when bored.
Everyone I know masturbates to girls on instagram, because the girls post hotness….but not all girls are created equally, despite what they try to make you believe with their trickery in poses and filters…some girls like @sarahstage are just fucking top of the charts amazing so I had to do a feature on her….cuz clearly she’s the fucking future…ideally of my love life…which involves a lot of masturbation and tears….or maybe it will be different this time, maybe she is the one, and our love will remain pure and filled with poetry. But I doubt it. It’s not my fault just look at her. Name Sarah Stage Location Valley of the Dolls Occupation model and aspiring In ‘n’Out Burger spokesmodel Instagram Handle @sarahstage When did you start Instagram? A year ago How many followers do you have? 105,000 4 Questions with with a href=”http://www.instagram.com/sarahstage” target=”_blank”> @sarahstage 1- Are do you like about Instagram? I am obsessed with photography and picking different filters and looking at all of the fun stuff that people brag about on Instagram! 2- What is the craziest thing you will do on camera? Take nude photos of myself after a spray tan 3- Will you hold my hand, look into my eyes and let me sing you love songs on our wedding night? No but I’ll take you for a burger at In n Out 5- What are your 6 favorite instagram pics you have posted of all time Pic of me as chola, My chihuahua jose dressed as a snowman, Pic of In n out burger and fries, Pic of me and Sasha Baron Cohen working at the oscars, Sleepover bubble bath night with my girlfriends, Pic of my bridal vampire party for Halloween, A pic that says fuck what people think Final Thoughts? Last Words? Now’s Your Chance! Sarah stage is my real name. Wait, did I tell you that I love in n out burger?? Find her on TWITTER Here are her favorite pics….mine are the naughtier ones…that coy little tease….
Best news story ever…or at least for today: A former NFL cheerleader has been charged with aggravated sexual battery after allegedly grabbing a 12-year-old boy’s penis outside his pants … and attempting to perform oral sex on him. 42-year-old Elizabeth Garner — who cheered for the Tennessee Titans until 2009 — was also charged with solicitation of a minor for rape of a child. According to law enforcement, Garner — who is married — is accused of following the 12-year-old to the bathroom during a party last month hosted by the boy’s mother, grabbing his penis over his shorts … and attempting to remove them in order to perform oral sex on him. The boy escaped, told his mother what happened … and the mother then informed authorities. According to police, the boy said Garner asked if he’d ever been with a woman. During a police interview, cops claim Garner willingly admitted she approached the boy … but said she was drunk and had confused him with an (adult) man at the party. (We’ll see how that defense pans out.) I wish shit like this happened when I was 12, but I was always the kid no one wanted to molest. I appreciate her excuse “I was drunK”….which legally doesn’t really hold much of a defense when in court and being charged for sex crimes, like meeting a 17 year old off the internet in Florida one night after she seduced you on chat for the authorities…you know telling you what you want to hear….entrapment. I also like “I thought it was an adult” cuz 12 year olds and 40 year old men have so much in common in terms of their build now with all the hormones in the food. I mean at the point between tapping him on the shoulder and asking him if he had been with other women before trying to suck him off, you’d think she’d realize he was 12. Who are we to judge, maybe they do things different in pre-Teennesee. More importantly, she’s a fucking ex NFL cheerleader, who looks like a hooker, it is not like she’s some top grade morally sound citizen…. Still a good story for her to tell her grandkids about one day.
Miranda Kerr is in Vogue Australia and she’s in a bikini top in one of the pictures. I probably shouldn’t pay attention to things like this, I am sure there are many better things for me to be doing with my time….Like looking at pics of Miranda Kerr naked, or half naked, in the hundreds of posts I have done on her….but for some reason, I’m sucked into this one, maybe cuz it’s for a magazine that drops in April, making me feel like I am Michael J Fox, pre-shakes, traveling into the future, without getting off my fucking couch. Here are the pics
