Tag Archives: underwear

Sara and Shannon are Twin Strangers of the DAy

Years ago, probably in the Myspace era, there was a site where people would upload a picture of their face and find a celebrity lookalike…it was pretty fucking dumb, but people loved it and would post their celebrity lookalikes all fucking day…normally the people didn’t look anything like them…primitive technology and I guess the talent pool of actual celebrities isn’t too deep, so every dude looks like either Leonardo DiCaprio or Johnny Depp and very little in between. Doesn’t matter. I guess there was a shift from people giving a fuck about celebrities, because they don’t, they give a fuck about their own likes on instagram and production of compelling content, so it would only be natural in this self obsessed, selfie generation world, to want to find someone who looks like you… What speaks to the ego more than finding your twin, who isn’t even from the same part of the world, so the idea that your dad cheated on your mom is thrown out the window… I’ve always thought the idea of doppelgangers was funny, I also though the idea of people with the same name as you is funny, you know how many Jesus Martinez’s are there in the world…how many wrestling mask men are there in the world…kinda thing, only I actually don’t care about myself…or people cursed with my disfigurement… But when it involves a Swedish blonde and an Irish blonde looking eerily like every single blonde girl ever…things get real. Seriously, they look like every single blonde girl ever. I could find them 30-60 more doppelgangers to help market their find your twin website… Idiots. The post Sara and Shannon are Twin Strangers of the DAy appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Sara and Shannon are Twin Strangers of the DAy

Miranda Kerr Naked for Harper’s Bazaar Australia of the Day

Miranda Kerr is who I like to call the the Sugar Babies of the year. That’s a polite way of saying “Money Grubbing Hooker”…because she had a legit million dollar or more a year modeling career after getting knocked up by a famous Australian actor because she was working the scene as a low hanging fruit Australian model…who know the right people to get access to Orlando Bloom’s sperm that made a baby no one talks about… I’ve been told by people who work with her management that she’s the fucking worst. A diva, a bitch, a cunt…they were the same people who told me she got fired from Victoria’s Secret for fucking Bieber…while married…which turned out to be an actual story a few months later…that no one really cared about, since it is Miranda Kerr and no one cares about her.. That said, she’s gone on to work for a few brands after Victoria’s Secret, because I guesss there is life after Victoria’s Secret, but more interestingly..she has dated at least 3-4 billionaires…bcause when you’re Victoria’s Secret model on your resume model, you can command more for your man than a low level instagram model.. I guess one of the steps in her staying relevant enough as a model to keep her billionaire, is doing shoots that get press, in this era that means naked…so here she is for Harper’s Bazaar Australia…without showing her mom pussy…meaning what’s the fucking point… The post Miranda Kerr Naked for Harper’s Bazaar Australia of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Miranda Kerr Naked for Harper’s Bazaar Australia of the Day

Alyssa Miller for Love & Lemons Swim of the Day

You may remember Alyssa Miller from Sports Illustrated many years ago…but she hasn’t really done anything since…so you probably don’t remember her at all..and you’re thinking “who is this old chick in a bikini”…. Well, just because she’s old and washed up…even dumpy…and a virtual no name who lost out to the instagram models… We can’t take away the fact that she was is Sports Illustrated Swimsuit a bunch of years ago, a job that she secured by fucking one of the photographers….before cheating on him with Jake Gyllenhaal, because when you are a self serving whore you do self serving whore things, trying to better your life, because all whores want a better whore life….. Sure Gyllenhaal is a homo, lame as fuck, but when he comes a knocking, you got to throw in any morals or values or loyalty you have to the man who got you this far…and just go for it…it’s the ladder climb… Well, I guess her friends started a lingerie line that has become a swimwear line…because here she is as their model…a job that I assume is a friend hook up more than anything… The post Alyssa Miller for Love & Lemons Swim of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Alyssa Miller for Love & Lemons Swim of the Day

Bella Thorne Pushing Booty of the Day

Bella Thorne is the 40 year old pretending to be 17 before turning 18…..like she was Courtney Stodden or other girls who were clearly older than they said they were….pretending to be under 18…dressing slutty…getting dudes excited….since that’s what the American male is into…since it is illegal and bad…which I guess increases the speed of orgasm, something I can’t relate to since 16 is legal here and I never fuck with that…or capitalize on that… I guess what I’m saying is that I’m wholesome, and here’s Bella Thorne, the it girl who has to be lying about her age…doing a little booty pop…all redheaded and cute…which is good enough for me to post… Here she is for instagram Here is some more red dress To See The Rest Of The Pics CLICK HERE The post Bella Thorne Pushing Booty of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Bella Thorne Pushing Booty of the Day

Models for Terribly Boring La Perla Ads of the Day

Natasha Poly, Liu Wen, and Mariacarla Boscono are the models selected for the La Perla Spring / Summer 2016 campaign…and shit is pretty fucking boring for a lingerie company… I’m not expecting these higher end version of Victoria’s Secret, and less interesting version of Agent Provocateur to go down the Miley Cyrus route of strap-ons and fucking ridiculousness, with midgets and obese women…on some sideshow kick.. But I’m not expecting them to be as generic as Victoria’s Secret, or even more generic than Victoria’s Secret, I mean even Victoria’s Secret is more interesting to look at than this… The funny thing in all this is they hired Mert & Marcus, who makes 80k a day for this kind of thing…which to me is a huge waste of fucking money….unless they are marketing lingerie in some Christian Weekly paper, I don’t get this at all… But here’s some expensive models, shot by expensive photographers, for an expensive brand, and the end result is some bootleg shit… The post Models for Terribly Boring La Perla Ads of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Models for Terribly Boring La Perla Ads of the Day

Adriana Lima Thick for Cover Girl Magazine of the Day

Last week, I had an argument with a girl about Adriana Lima losing her edge by gaining a whole lot of other things, like her barrel body…that isn’t really something you’d expect from a lingerie model, but definitely something you’d expect from a mom who keeps fit at the gym when her husband is at work making money to pay for her expensive life… I guess what I’m saying is that I am a firm believer in throwing in the towel, retiring, doing other things that involve being clothed, because younger girls…just look better than older women…in underwear…no matter how many millions of dollars are left on the contract, it’s not worth the humilation… I guess it’s possible these are just bad pics… The post Adriana Lima Thick for Cover Girl Magazine of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Adriana Lima Thick for Cover Girl Magazine of the Day

Adriana Lima Knows Her Angles of the Day

I got hate mail from one person for calling Adriana Lima fat in at least 1 of the last few posts I’ve featured her in…because I guess I was being a little to quick to pull the plus sized model card, seeing as she’s not fat…obviously…or at least not fat like we know fat…where bellies are hanging over elastic band pants….fat….but she is looking her age, like a mom, with a barrel of a body…much like a pug…like the old timer stripper working the day shift…you still get a lap dance from her…but you prefer when her daughter, following her foot steps is working…ya know… Not to mention, Lima may be fat, I’ve seen many secret internet fatties rocking their angles…to look lean and even toned…so…I’ll only be able to give you an educated opinion when she’s sitting on my face…. The post Adriana Lima Knows Her Angles of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Adriana Lima Knows Her Angles of the Day

Chloe Moretz Has No Nipples of the Day

The biggest scandal in Chloe Moretz’s public life is that she’s playing the live action Little Mermaid…and she’s going to have Blonde hair…even though Ariel has red hair…how could they do this… I think the bigger scandal in Chloe Moretz’s career should be that she’s got no nipples…at least not in lace shirts… But you perverts don’t care, you’re committed to the cause, and that cause is barely 18 year olds you’ve been masturbating since they were 12…freak… TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE The post Chloe Moretz Has No Nipples of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Chloe Moretz Has No Nipples of the Day

Selena Gomez Tits for Christmas of the Day

Selena GOmez is my favorite pre-marital sex Catholic Mexican girl..who probably has no soul, thanks to her mom selling her off to the entertainment industry, but she does have conviction and day after day she goes out there to be a pop singer…like she was Taylor Swift…despite having never done one single hit that anyone beyond a bunch of 12 year old girls who liked her because she fucked bieber…could stomach…the same 12 year old girls she’s saying “hey look at my tits, the media loves my tits, I got them when I was undergoing the lowest dose of Chemo, which has been a great sympathy card to play, as Cheemo makes people think of dying kids”….when really the only thing dying about her, is any dignity she may have as a perfomer…you know as the realization that she’s not ever going to be a huge pop star and that she should go back to TV acting… slowly sets in…. I guess the takeaway from all this is that people still love talking about tits…thank god. TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE The post Selena Gomez Tits for Christmas of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Selena Gomez Tits for Christmas of the Day

Heidi Klum for Galore Magazine of the Day

Galore Magazine is a magazine that’s doing the whole throw parties at key events like Art Basel, Fashion Week and Coachella…cast the key instagram models on instagram as part of the magazine….to make sure they go to the parties…do cover photoshoots with people of interest or actual models…like Heidi Klum..have those people of interest also show up at those parties…and you pretty much just secured relevance…without even writing one life changing article..and who really wants to write a fucking article…when you can hang out at parties with models and take pics…as that’s the level of brain power the kids have…clever… I don’t think the pics are that hot, I hate black and white from a digital camera, but I guess they compliment Heidi Klum best, since she’s old as fuck..but she does still have a great body…which is more than I can say about the old people I fuck, all medicated, half dead, and disgusting as I pull their adult diapers to the side… The post Heidi Klum for Galore Magazine of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Heidi Klum for Galore Magazine of the Day