Irina Shayk inspires me to get my fitness game on, unfortunately, every time I go to the gym, the girls who look like Irina Shayk are in hiding, and the girls who look like Roseanne, Oprah, or really any obeses disgusting pile of shit, covered in sweat, dying for a donut, or an ice cream you know she’s going to get after the work out, cuz she’s earned it…you know, disgusting fat chick shit…so I’ll just stare at Shayk’s intagram instead…it’s less work this way.
Irina Shayk inspires me to get my fitness game on, unfortunately, every time I go to the gym, the girls who look like Irina Shayk are in hiding, and the girls who look like Roseanne, Oprah, or really any obeses disgusting pile of shit, covered in sweat, dying for a donut, or an ice cream you know she’s going to get after the work out, cuz she’s earned it…you know, disgusting fat chick shit…so I’ll just stare at Shayk’s intagram instead…it’s less work this way.
Now that America has passed laws that prevent people from coming together as a group to protest , because having people come together as a group to protest things, especially government initiated things, is something the government doesn’t want you doing, so they want the authority to lock you up if you do, seems pretty fair, I mean historically the government always knows what is best for us. They always have our best interest in mind. They aren’t owned and operated by big businesses, and they don’t pass laws like cigarette and oil and corn and all the other crazy shit they do because it kills us, they do it for our own good…so don’t protest that shit… What better way to celebrate that law then to show how cops handle protestors in Austria….it’s kinda horrible, kinda funny, but better than when shit in Austria was run by Nazi Germany…right? FREEDOM!!
I would love to smell the room after this picture of Kate Moss spreading her legs was taken…I assume it smelled like a cross between heaven…and a polluted wasteland filled with death of all living creatures…you know thanks to her hard living, party living, liberal with her vagina living, that had sex with heroin addict rockstar living, without a condom because people in Hollywood and Entertainment and Fashion and really anywhere don’t use condoms, condoms are for sick people, plus AIDS isn’t a death sentence and herpes is actually beneficial because once you get it, you don’t have to worry about getting it anymore…obviously….and I want it smeared on my face, dripping off my face, it seems so luxurious, I mean why else would she be in Esquire…
This is refreshing…I mean I always felt like the arab variety of suicide bombers lacked a certain level of discipline, organization, uniform…you know it just wasn’t official enough, almost seat of the pants, wingin’ it, committed, but not quite equipped with government or military issued bomb packs, with the nuclear logo on them, so people know they have a self destruct button… I guess that’s not quite as exciting as two Minutes of Driving in Barnaul Russia…where the people are insane….because they are in Russia. This is pretty dramatic drive. The World has gone nuts.
This guy is the best kind of asshole. Some drunk dude in San Diego drove off a cliff, and this guy was there to capture the rescue footage, where he narrates a whole bunch of craziness, that makes me laugh…from calling the Ambulance driver Christopher Reeves, to making fun of the skinny reporter…shit may not be that on point, or that hilarious out of context, but pretty fucking solid…more news needs to be handled by amateur comedians… it is great..
Constance Jablonski is modeling some activewear, some bikinis and some lingerie for H&M, because I guess that’s what models do…at least when they have finally made it and a corporate brand wants to scoop them the fuck up… But I’m more into her modeling her NIPPLES … She started at her nipples or a willingness to show them to photographers for fashion, now she’s here.
The story goes like this…two bouncers beat the fuck out of two white dude in Florida because they were defending Trayvon Martin…and in defending Trayvon Martin, all white dudes must die…even though the dude who killed Trayvon was a Mexican….and the white dudes get arrested for it. Bouncers are thugs, their favorite thing is that they can legally beat the fuck out of anyone they want, however aggressive they want. I have been beat up by bouncers, one was wearing a padded kevlar glove and he pounded my face in, fracturing my sinus. I went to the cops, bleeding all over the place, and they told me that bouncers can do whatever they want in the bar, that I was at fault and if I didn’t get home or to a hospital I would be arrested. So this video doesn’t surprise me, but it’s clearly excessive and people need to see it….
TV is pornographic now and I am a huge fan of that, because masturbating to music videos, figure skating, tennis and swimming competitions, Mary Hart’s legs, Chrissy from Threes Company…Jennifer Aniston’s nipples in friends, Roseanne and Oprah on the off days, some sluts on Jerry Springer and Scrambled porn, got boring fast and forced the world to turn to the internet to get off…and in TVs struggle to stay alive, they got a little European up in America….and said “hey sex isn’t all that bad, let’s fucking compete, fuck the Christians and the censors, and the advertisers, it’s on” and as far as I’m concerned that’s a good kind of evolution, progressive unlike when we gave women the right to vote. Let’s just hope it leads to penetration… Here’s Anna Paquin in True Blood Here’s Brooke Smith in Ray Donovan Here are the pics..
Emily Ratajkowski is famous now.. She’s booking all kind of jobs, from modeling, to spokesperson shit, to acting, shit’s gone out of control and all because she got naked and showed off her rockin’ natural looking tits, a lot, in a strategic way, working with the right magazines, the right photographer, fucking with the right famous dudes in LA, and that landed her tits on the right music video, that went so fucking viral, that she’s become a household name…. I’ve been supporting this girl for a long time, almost since the beginning and I’ve even written her at least one love song….and by love song I mean tried to masturbate to her a couple times… But really her legacy, isn’t great tits, it’s telling girls everywhere, to show their fucking tits and dreams will come true, if done proper. So do it proper. Here she is for Nasty Gal…
