Avril Lavigne is doing some 90s throwback video, you know I guess a tribute to back when she as actually 15, and not 18 years later when she dresses and pretends she’s 15….cuz it makes her money…. It is some Tank Girl theme.. something 15 year olds probably have never heard of…and more importantly it’s starring some Winnie Cooper from the Wonder Years in some shiny panties…showing off her rockin’ ass… I appreciate Winnie Cooper pooper…but I really wasn’t down with her or all the hype she had as the love interest in the Wonder Years, not that I’ve revisted that show since it was taken off the air, but I remember wanting to fuck the sister, one of his blond girlfriends, but this frigid neighbor who never committed or put out, with her stupid bangs just pissed me off… But I guess like every uptight chick from high school, she’s managed to grow up into an attention seeking slut, you know in efforts to get the attention she once had and I endorse that…because it’s better than when the hot chick from high school gets married, has a dozen kids, and develops an oreo addiction to deal with her shitty life… To See the Rest of the Pics CLICK HERE
Rihanna may be played out…She may be on the verge of losing her fucking mind because the fame game is too much for some ghetto puppet from the Islands to handle…people may hate her, they may find her annoying, they may all her out for being a talentless hack while trying to figure out why she’s famous and so many hotter more talented aren’t…you know trying to sort out who she fucked when underage and who she has dirt on to secure this empire she’s built…because you know it wasn’t just a fluke…But I think she’s pretty fucking perfect..especially when she twerks….I’m a fan. She’s done it before…to Drake Music….I guess it’s kinda her job…right… If that’s not good enough – here’s 101 Vine Twerks Compilation
Apparently, a lot of dudes are threatened by sex toys. More than one girl has told me that their boyfriends don’t allow sex toys in the bedroom, because they feel they challenge their manhood, and that they should be the key to any fake orgasm…which is insane… But if you are like me, you fucking love sex toys…because no only are they fun to use, they take any pressure off you to get a girl off, and allow you to trick girls into thinking you’re a great lover, without them realizing, that it’s has nothing really to do with you, you just happen to be there. You see, a primed and ready girl who has either just had an orgasm or is about to have an orgasm, is far more fun to have sex with, and she’ll usually leave you wanting to come back for more…not to mention, when she masturbates and you’re not around, she’ll remember how good it was doin’ it together. One of the best out there is the HELLO TOUCH Wearable Vibrator by Jimmy Jane….This shit is from the fucking future, you put it on your hand and you can massage a girl better than she’s ever been massaged… Remember, there’s nothing better than leaving a girl happy, with what she considers a memorable sexual adventure…a doctor doesn’t go into surgery without proper equipment….a tennis player doesn’t hit the court without a racket…a race car driver doesn’t show up to a race without a car…technology is designed to help us be lazy…and get better results…you can’t turn your back on that… JimmyJane is Offering 20% off their premium futuristic toys Use Coupon Code DSFSUMMER2013 ….Offer ends JULY 31….So get up on it…any girl you use it on will appreciate it, just don’t tell them you’ve used it on other girls, you player you… Get yours CLICK HERE Here are some pics of some girls in panties posing with their awesome JIMMYJANE!! Get yours CLICK HERE
The other day, we rounded up a couple of our amazing, and I mean amazing stepGIRLS and got them to pose with our favorite bicycle, which happens to be an amazing State Bicycle Co bike… State Bicycle Co is a company, that if you know bikes, you will know, make some of the most stylish bicycles around that will get you noticed…which is really what you should want. Like these: You know the kind of bicycle that will get any girl excited to ride with you, even if you don’t have a car, because they just have that much cool… I find bicycles highly erotic. I love girls on bicycles, girls next to bicycles, sniffing bicycle seats when they are still warm after a babe happens park her bike next to me on a hot summer day….creeping on some panty shots when the wind blows bicycyle riding babes and their skirts the right way…so it was only natural to get our stepGIRLS half naked and next to a bike….and shit is HOT HOT HOT. You can find the perfect bike for yourself at StateBicycle.com , they are as low as $389 + Free Shipping… Even better, every State Bicycle Co. model is limited edition, so you can be sure that the bike you buy will be unique. Because we did this shoot, State Bicycle Co has decided to offer, Exclusive for Drunken Stepfather readers, 10% off your order now until July 31st. Use coupon code: drunkstate at check out. To get yourself a bike, and we suggest you do, cuz they are awesome and chicks dig em… CLICK HERE
In videos that make absolutely no sense, here’s a guy who rides his bike past a motorbike, stops and has what I assume is an intense conversation with the bike, before dropping his pants and having sex with it, in the mittle of the street…..I guess dude really likes motorcycles….too much to control himself in fucking public. This is insane.
After reading the statement that Martin Scorsese ‘s representatives released in response to the lawsuit that’s been filed against him by Cecchi Gori Pictures over a project called Silence , I think I can save both sides a bundle in lawyer’s fees and, ultimately, production costs. Both sides of this legal battle should ask themselves a pertinent question: Do you actually think that this movie, if it’s ever made, will actually put asses in seats? Hear me out. Scorsese is one of my favorite filmmakers, and given his obsession with religion, I’m confident he’d make a compelling adaptation of Silence , an acclaimed 1966 Shusaku Endo novel about a Jesuit investigating whether his mentor committed apostasy — renounced his beliefs — at a time when Christians were faced with the prospect of being hung upside down over a pit and slowly bled to death if they refused. The Christians are essentially coerced into renouncing their faith by stepping on fumie ,crudely carved wooden images of Jesus Christ. Heard enough? Look, movies about the strength of one’s beliefs and God’s relationship with humanity can be powerful. One of the aspects of Prometheus that I particularly loved was how Ridley Scott and Damon Lindelof explored those very deep concepts in their sci-fi blockbuster earlier this summer. Silence doesn’t sound powerful to me, though. It sounds like a ponderous slog that covers territory Scorsese already traversed in The Last Temptation of Christ . More importantly, Silence , just by virtue of its subject matter, has the markings of a small, boutique film. That’s not the kind of film Scorsese, one of our greatest living directors, should making in his golden years. I want him doing David Lean-size big-picture stuff like The Wolf of Wall Street , and, I suspect, so do his handlers. According to Deadline , Cecchi Gori Pictures claims in its lawsuit that it invested more than $750,000 to develop Silence into a feature film based on contracts and assurances that it would be Scorsese’s next project. Scorsese initally agreed in 1990 to co-produce and direct Silence after he completed Kundun (1997). But the lawsuit alleges Scorsese and Sikelia arranged to postpone starting on Silence so the director could make The Departed (2006), Shutter Island (2010) and Hugo (2011). When Cecchi Gori learned that Scorsese was going to shoot The Wolf of Wall Street instead of Silence, the company claimed breach of contract. Scorsese’s responded to the suit today with the following statement: “It is shocking to us that the lawyers for Cecchi Gori Pictures would file a suit pursuing such absurd claims considering the amicable working relationship existing between Martin Scorsese and the principals of Cecchi Gori Pictures.The claims asserted are completely contradicted by, inconsistent with, and contrary to the express terms of an agreement entered into by the parties last year.” The statement added: “The lawsuit filing on the eve of Mr. Scorsese starting another picture has all the earmarks of a media stunt.” Given that the amount of Cecchi Gori’s investment isn’t even $1 million — a paltry sum in moviemaking terms — there should be a compromise here that enables Cecchi Gori’s principals to walk away without feeling like they got burned and for Scorsese to make the movies he wants to make, when he wants to make them. I just hope that Silence isn’t one of them. Follow Frank DiGiacomo on Twitter. Follow Movieline on Twitter.
In the latest installment of ARRIVALS , spotlighting breakthrough performers, Movieline chats with Dania Ramirez, who cycles to stardom opposite Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Michael Shannon in this week’s Premium Rush . As Vanessa, the tough bicycling beauty of David Koepp’s adrenaline-fueled Premium Rush , Dominican-born Dania Ramirez ( X-Men: The Last Stand , Entourage , Heroes ) bursts onto the screen with such vitality that it’s no wonder director Spike Lee gave Ramirez her big break, years ago, after recognizing her as a former extra on one of his shoots. Ramirez, a onetime college volleyball star, credits her career to Lee (she appeared in his Subway Stories , The 25th Hour , and She Hate Me before carving out a career in TV and film; she’s got Marc Cherry’s Devious Maids series lined up for 2013). She spoke further with Movieline about her career beginnings, the artistic impulse behind her short spoof “Ass and Titties,” her real life job history (McDonalds to Rollergirl!) and her bicycling horror stories from the set of Premium Rush , in which fellow NYC bike messenger Joseph Gordon-Levitt woos her while they both tangle with a crooked cop (Michael Shannon). In a lot of movies it’s a little disappointing to see cutaways in action scenes that make it obvious that the actors are not doing their own stunts, but in Premium Rush it’s at least clear that you guys knew your way around a bicycle. The good thing about this movie is that a lot of the movie takes place on the bikes, so we had to get good at riding, and to a certain extent doing stunts. [Laughs] But don’t get me wrong, this is not to take credit away from the amazing, talented stunt people that were on set helping us out. There’s a fall that I take where I jump into the air and I could never have done that. Thank God for my stunt double! Joe [Gordon-Levitt] had four other people coming in and helping out. But we trained for six weeks in L.A. prior to shooting – to make sure our endurance was up, but also learning how to jump curbs and skid the bike and stop and turn so that we could do most of the cool sort of riding within the scenes and not have to have a stunt person come in. This not a movie full of CGI and effects, it’s a movie that you feel we’re really in danger and the ones doing everything. That’s what’s cool about it. That’s what makes it authentic. During the end credits there’s a neat but kind of horrifying video of [Joseph Gordon-Levitt] bleeding profusely after smashing his bike into the back of a cab. Yeah! He got 31 stitches. He went through a cab’s windshield! We had been filming for, I think, a month and a half, and that was definitely a moment when Joe and I looked at each other and said, ‘Maybe we should let the stunt people come in and do the stunts.’ [Laughs] We were so committed to wanting to be these people, and sometimes as an actor you wind up feeling invincible… That you have your characters’ abilities? Yes – you feel like you are this bad ass bike messenger and the truth is, we’re actors. Did you have any spills yourself? I fell every single day I worked, almost. I had bruises everywhere. I had these two gouges on my leg while I was riding, when I hit the mirror off the cab because my chain went into my wheel and I hit a pothole and hit the ground hard. We hit the ground all the time! I needed make-up all over my legs to cover up my bruises on a regular basis. But I like it. I like the adrenaline. And you’re a former athlete, which probably helped. I played volleyball at Montclair State – I did not ride a bike prior to doing this movie, I actually had a bike phobia. I fell down when I was like seven years old, really hardcore, and I did like three flips in the air with my bike. So this was an opportunity for me to sort of face my fear. And I did, and now I love it! I have two bikes now that I own and I’m training for the Malibu triathlon on September 16, I believe. So I’ve been training! Well, I feel that I can now share with you my secret: I still can’t ride a bike. You have to try! Now that you’ve watched the movie doesn’t it inspire you to go learn? Maybe you can start by the beach, with a beach cruiser. I’ll give it a shot. I think you should! Even if I should learn, at long last – how does one master the art of looking sexy while working up a sweat on a bike? You do that well, along with the rest of the cast. What is the trick to that? You’re the second person to call that sexy – I was not trying to be sexy! I don’t know how that came across sexy! I honestly was sweating, it was New York City in the summertime… Joe and I both were sweating bullets as the cameras were rolling, having to change shirts on a regular basis because we were so sweaty. But I think that’s what makes it so hot! The fact that we were sweaty, and raw, and it’s New York City. [Laughs] Now, let’s take it back to the beginning. Legend has it you were discovered by Jay-Z… My first time on camera ever I did Streets Is Watching , a compilation of music videos that he was doing. It was sort of like a mini-movie. An interesting part about me is that I didn’t grow up in this country and acting wasn’t something that I knew anything about, or something that I grew up thinking I could actually do for a living. So when I got cast in that I took it really seriously – and then came to find out that it was just a music video. [Laughs] But I don’t regret anything I’ve done in my life, and I love the fact that that was the first thing I’d ever done. I went from that to then walking into a featured extra situation with Spike Lee that led to my first starring role in a film, in Spike Lee’s She Hate Me . Spike was actually the first to discover me, as far as giving me respect within the industry. How did that happen? I was 16 years old and I went in for Subway Stories , a little mini-series he did for HBO, and I was a featured extra but it was the first time I got a SAG card. Right after that I started taking acting classes in New York City at the Actor’s Workshop studio and then I took a few years off to go to school. When I came out I did a commercial that Spike Lee directed for Kmart that led to him writing a part for me in 25th Hour and a few months later I went in and auditioned for She Hate Me , to play Alex opposite Kerry Washington. You must have made a great impression at 16. When I did the Kmart commercial he remembered me from Subway Stories ! I remember him remembering me while I was shooting the commercial, he brought it up. That was the last time before I got kicked out of my house that I walked into my dad’s house, we were shooting nights so I got home at like 6 o’clock in the morning and it was the day before I started college. My dad was like, ‘You’re either going to do this and be a lawyer or you’re going to do [acting].’ So I just never went back home. Spike is a very influential part of why I’m here today. Wow. It’s fantastic that he saw that something in you so early. Now, there’s a line in Premium Rush in which your character says she works as a bike messenger because she hates waiting tables. I’ve done every kind of job there is, from working at McDonald’s to doing a music video to roller blading at the Roxy. [Laughs] I was Rollergirl for a while! But I don’t act because I hate to wait tables, I actually act because I think it’s what I was always meant to do. Random question: What’s behind your Instagram handle, @markofthebeast? Mark of the beast! I’m a beast, and I want to leave my mark on everybody that dares to look. [Laughs] I remember watching you in a short film spoof , playing Nicki Minaj… It wasn’t so much a spoof of Nicki Minaj, that was more of a parody of America. To be honest with you, it was a way deeper message than what people took away from it. It’s called “Ass and Titties” and it’s about how in America these days you sort of get paid more for shaking your ass and titties than for your talent. That’s what the parody was about. Why Nicki Minaj? I had to choose – I’m not a rapper! I had to choose someone to channel the song through, so I chose Nicki Minaj. But I think everyone had a good response to it. You know, I’m an artist and I was just being an artist about my views in life, and if you have a good sense of humor about yourself it’s great. I don’t have anything against Nicki Minaj, or anybody that’s [parodied] in it! Premium Rush is in theaters today. Follow Jen Yamato on Twitter . Follow Movieline on Twitter .
The indomitable bike messenger played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt in Premium Rush is named Wilee, as in Wile E. Coyote, the less successful half of Looney Tunes’ eternal desert chase duo. A few minutes into the movie, however, it becomes clear he’s more like the Road Runner: Wiry and whippet thin, Wilee darts through Manhattan traffic on his fixed gear bike — chain lock wrapped around his waist — thumbing his nose at the NYPD and evading the dogged pursuit of corrupt detective Bobby Monday ( Michael Shannon ). No Chamois Ass is he. Though Wilee is introduced via a spectacular slow-motion crash set to the sunny opening strains of The Who’s “Baba O’Riley,” he carries himself through most of the film with a cartoonish sense of imperviousness that could be interpreted as a death wish even before he gets entangled with dirty cops and Chinese gangsters. A favorite trick of the film — directed by David Koepp ( Secret Window , Stir of Echoes ) from a screenplay he wrote with John Kamps— has Wilee mentally projecting different paths through tight situations until he susses out the one that doesn’t leave him smeared on the sidewalk. It’s a device that underscores the character’s precarious vulnerability as he jockeys with all of the heavy metal vehicles careening through the streets of New York. This fuels the chase sequences with excitement and a looming sense of consequence. It’s a good thing too, since the bulk of the film consists of one kind of heart-pounding pursuit or another. Premium Rush is a half-entertaining, half-exasperating movie — one that sells you on the notion of New York bike messengers as great fodder for cinema but then doesn’t know how to build a feature around them. It barely has enough forward motion to make it through its 91-minute run time and spins its wheels — pun totally intended — with sequences (like one in an impound lot) that feel like blatant filler. Premium Rush bobs and weaves stylistically using backward jumps in time to fill in plot details and cuts to a Google Maps-style city grid that establishes the locations of the characters — but ultimately there’s only so much you can do on a bike. The movie tends to get muddled and laggy when the characters hop off their two-wheelers to actually talk, because they’re not good at talking. This is the kind of film in which you constantly find yourself thinking that a particular bit of trouble could have been avoided by characters either coming clean about their problems or yelling for help when the bad guys roll their way. Wilee turns out to be a Columbia Law School grad who chooses to ride all day rather than take the bar exam because, he explains in voiceover, “I can’t work in an office.” (The crushing student loans he has to be shouldering apparently aren’t burdening his free spirit.) He’s got a fellow messenger girlfriend named Vanessa (Dania Ramirez) and a professional and romantic rival in the muscular Manny (Wolé Parks), who dares to have gears on his bike. The main action in Premium Rush takes place from around 5pm to 7pm, as Wilee heads uptown to his alma mater to pick up a package from Vanessa’s roommate Nima (Jamie Chung) that Bobby is very anxious to intercept. What’s in the package isn’t worth going into — it’s a means for the film to travel to a number of distinctly New York locations. Premium Rush depicts the city as vibrant and lived-in, from the dive bar where bike messengers gather (to watch an extremely intimate live show by the band Sleigh Bells) to a plant-lined street in the flower district, to the back-room Chinatown gambling den where wry bookies and hoods watch the impulsive Bobby dig himself a deep hole playing pai gow. Shannon has a great time chewing the scenery as the off-the-rails detective, and Gordon-Levitt continues to prove that he’s an intriguingly unconventional action hero, albeit one who comes across as a little smug in this movie. That said, he brings a sweaty substantiality to the scenes of Wilee diving through traffic against a light or hitching a ride on a cab. Like seasoned Manhattan cyclists, Gordon-Levitt rides as if his bike is an extension of his body. While the film’s pop psychologizing about Wilee’s choice of wheels would make even the most devoted of fixie fanatics roll their eyes — he doesn’t want to stop, and he can’t, because he doesn’t believe in brakes — there’s definite romance to be found here in the whirling of spokes, the communing of man and machine, and the crazy freedom of cutting through a dense urban landscape like sleek fish easily navigating the currents of a stream. Follow Alison Willmore on Twitter. Follow Movieline on Twitter.
Whoop Whoop! Will you check out the man cakes on that biker! Traffic from the Miami marathon Sunday forced Bron Bron to seek an alternate mode of transportation to Miami’s American Airlines Arena to square off against the Bulls. King James and a couple of his most trusted subjects biked their way to work rocking these lil spandex getups. Y’all already know we need you to Caption This! More shots on the flip
Gwyneth Paltrow was filming some shitty movie because Hollywood is insular and they cast the same idiots for the same concept movies over and over and over again because like me…they like to beat a dead horse since the public will buy anything…you idiots…. That said, they put her in bike spandex, made her ride her bike, and the paparazzi got a shot of her pussy eating her seat, the basis of my bike seat sniffing fetish I always get caught attempting to live out when hot girls on hot days dock their bike on a lamp post and head into the market to buy lunch… Don’t confuse this for me thinking Gwyneth Paltrow is someone hot enough to jerk off to…I just have this habit of posting useless pictures of useless people who people think are important all day…
