All right, this week is done. How did that go for you, masked Nic Cage? [Stony silence] Yeah, I relate. So let’s get to the Week in Review, where we can inventory the sidesplitting happenings for posterity. Box office results to come in the days ahead — stay tuned, and we’ll see you then!
Haters gonna hate, but really. Come on. Tell me this new poster for Adam Sandler’s twin-sibling comedy Jack and Jill isn’t coaxing you into the pillowy bosom of anticipation. Tell me its nuanced, dulcet comic strains don’t seductively sing from the page — that you do not tumble under the influence of Sandler’s masculine grimace and toothy distaff gape, or that those hormonal pangs stirring within are attributable to anything besides the provocative tagline. Tell me your pen doesn’t slip through quivering, perspiring fingers as it notes that singular release date on every calendar in the house, or that when those calendars have expired at year’s end, the vacant wall space left behind will not be stuffed with the engorged genius of Sandler’s marketing muscle. Go ahead. I’m waiting.
Happy Friday! Also in today’s edition of The Broadsheet: Tyra Banks really wants a Modelland movie… Casey Affleck might be an angel… A Toronto darling faces an American remake… Spend your Halloween with The Thing … and more.
If you need yet another sign of how impossible it’s become to separate the public persona of Kevin Smith from his films, look no further than the posters for Red State proclaiming it “AN UNLIKELY FILM FROM THAT KEVIN SMITH, ” as if the film were actually directed by the man’s prolific Twitter account . In the last few years, the funny, profane voice that’s made Smith’s dialogue so distinctive has essentially outgrown the films that used to showcase it, as Smith’s podcasts, his sometimes pugnacious social media feed and his speaking tours have made any cinematic output all but beside the point. When he made a splash at Sundance in January premiering his latest work Red State , it was more for the live auction he was reportedly going to hold to sell distribution rights after the screening than for the film itself.
We’ve gone back and forth on the marketing for The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo , from parsing its initial, pseudo-bootlegged trailer to trawling its mysterious Tumblr to breaking down both NSFW and maybe too-SFW images to spending eight early minutes with David Fincher’s adaptation of the international bestseller. In a nutshell, it looks good! And today’s new, extended trailer looks even better.
In the first image from Tim Burton’s long-awaited forthcoming adaptation of Dark Shadows , you’ll find Johnny Depp, Michelle Pfeiffer, Helena Bonham Carter, Eva Green, Chloe Moretz and numerous others in various states of undead torpor. Click for bigger, and read on for more Buzz Break.
You couldn’t come up with a simpler, more nakedly inspirational story than the one told in Dolphin Tale : Unhappy, disengaged child of single mom finds a wounded dolphin caught in a trap’s ropes and cuts it free; proceeds to bond with the rescue group that’s working to rehabilitate said dolphin; becomes a chief player in dolphin’s gradual and difficult return to swimming with confidence.
As delightful as it is to watch Audrey Hepburn flitting about New York in Breakfast at Tiffany’s , gazing adoringly at jewels and pretty things and falling in love as party girl Holly Golightly — the original Carrie Bradshaw — a shadow has loomed over that film for decades: Namely, Mickey Rooney’s cartoonish turn as Mr. Yunioshi, the buck-toothed, bespectacled and slightly pervy Japanese man who lives upstairs. The good news, circa 2011, is that after years of not knowing exactly how to address that ugly, embarrassing moment in classic Hollywood cinema — hindsight and all that — Paramount Pictures, releasing the 50th Anniversary Blu-ray this week, offers a concerted effort to make amends.
It’s been established that Taylor Lautner can shuck a mean shirt, but can he hold together an action movie in its lead role? Over the approving shrieks of the Twilight fans in the audience, I’m going to gently suggest that at the moment, the answer is no. As Nathan, the teenage hero of Abduction , Lautner shows he’s handy with stunts, many of which he clearly and impressively performs himself, and good with a fight scene. But when it comes to exchanges of dialogue, displays of emotion or just standing around, he’s stiff and manifestly uncomfortable — this may be the first film I’ve even seen where when an actor goes to put his hand thoughtfully on his chin, it’s so awkward I became afraid he’d somehow miss and poke himself in the eye.
There’s so much worth anticipating in Parker , director Taylor Hackford’s adaptation of the famous literary thief created by author Donald Westlake. Honestly, though, if this sighting alone of Jason Statham on-set as the title character — in full powder-blue suite and 10-gallon hat — can’t coax a down payment on viewing this upon release, then nothing will. (Oh — and other pics feature some lady named Jennifer Lopez as well.) This and much more Buzz Break ahead.