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The Young Veins’ Take A Vacation!: The Joke’s On You

Ryan Ross and Jon Walker emerge from Panic! at the Disco with a crackling new album, in Bigger Than the Sound. By James Montgomery Young Veins Photo: One Haven Music Last month, as I stood in a half-filled Austin, Texas, dive bar watching Ryan Ross, Jon Walker and the rest of the Young Veins fumble and fuss with their vintage guitars and organs, I couldn’t help but feel a bit sorry for them. When Ross’ girlfriend (the Like’s Elizabeth “Z” Berg) began crawling around onstage, attempting to hook up her guitar pedals for him — because, as Ross would tell me later, he had “forgotten” his — I somehow felt a lot worse. After all, this was Ryan Ross, the same kid I had watched stalk the stage at a sold-out (and very loud) arena in 2006 , the same brilliant boy-child who had written one of my favorite albums of 2008 . I had such high hopes for him. The sky truly seemed like it was the limit. But then, he left Panic! at the Disco , posed precariously close to a plate of well-manicured cocaine in a now-infamous photo and disappeared into the hills of Hollywood with Walker to work on a record that would presumably never see the light of day. Either Ross was getting truly terrible career advice, or he had fallen victim to the same thing that had snared so many before him: ego. He had believed the hype, had squandered all that potential and this Austin gig — and a thousand more just like it — would be his penance. It was, for all intents and purposes, over for him. Only, here’s the thing. While the Veins’ set that night wasn’t particularly excellent — it was, after all, only their third show to date — there was something there: a buoyant, playful charm and a jovial jolt, even if the guitars didn’t sound all that great and Ross’ voice got buried in the mix way too often. This didn’t feel the least bit like a funeral — quite the opposite, in fact. Ross and Walker cracked jokes and exchanged wry smiles, exuding the same vibe I got from them toward the end of Panic!’s lifespan . It was, in some small way, like they were still playing an arena (albeit an arena that smelled like beer) and that they were privy to a very secret joke, one they weren’t quite sure they wanted to share with the world. Needless to say, I left the gig feeling a bit puzzled. But a few weeks later, back in New York and thoroughly deodorized, I finally understood what they were laughing about: I received an advance copy of the Veins’ debut album, Take a Vacation! (due June 8), a crackling, lightning-quick effort — 11 songs in just 29 minutes — that’s equal parts salty and sweet, heavily indebted to the past, unbelievably catchy and quite possibly the best joke you’ll hear all year. In other words, it’s pretty much everything I could ask for in a rock record, and then some. Working with producers Rob Mathes and Alex Greenwald (formerly of Phantom Planet), Ross and Walker have made an album that is totally, 100 percent theirs. Holed up in Calabasas, California, they listened to a ton of old 45s, probably smoked some funny cigarettes, watched the sun rise, made bonfires in the hills, invited all their friends over to sing on the choruses and cranked out songs that bear no resemblance to the rock music of today (and, by logical extension, have positively no chance of getting played on modern rock radio). They took the parts of Panic! at the Disco’s last album that fans liked least — the strummy, sunny, really excellent ones (“Northern Downpour,” etc.) — and made an entire record of them. And they did this all basically because they wanted to. It’s their own private joke (or their own private psychedelic reel ), one they eventually decided to share with the world. Buy only after they were good and ready to. And that’s probably what I like most about Vacation! — the fact that it’s deeply personal, important mostly to Ross and Walker. These are the songs they’ve wanted to write, even while the other half of Panic! seemed headed in the opposite direction. And so, they left the band and did their own thing. Repercussions and public opinion be damned. There are plenty of great musical moments too — the “aah-aah-aahs” and undeniable chorus of “Cape Town,” the enchantment-under-the-sea-worthy ballad “Everyone but You,” the campy stomp of “The Young Veins (Die Tonight),” smoky and ebullient album-closer “Heart of Mine” — but it’s that dogged determination to do their own thing, even if it means a lifetime of fumbling with vintage guitars in Texas dive bars that stands out most to me. It’s like Ross sings on “Other Girl,” just before the tune breaks out in a stony, sunrise-approved guitar solo: “You were right, I was wrong/ Like I always am, and you always are.” There are probably a million people he could be directing the line toward, only you know he doesn’t really care about any of them. He’s fumbling and stumbling to the beat of his own drummer now. Who cares about the future when you’ve got the past? Questions? Concerns? Hit me up at BTTS@MTVStaff.com .

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The Young Veins’ Take A Vacation!: The Joke’s On You

Ashley Dupre Playboy picture

“Some people call me the girl who brought down the governor of New York, but in reality he brought me down,” Ashley Dupre said. “I was an escort. As much as I wish I could make that go away, I can#39;t.” Former call girl and current NY Post s-ex columnist Ashley Dupre graces the cover of the May Playboy wearing nothing but a sheet. She reportedly caught fire during the shoot. In addition to an 8-page nu-de pictorial, Dupre gives an interview and says she#39;s now celibate. “I love s-ex and I

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Ashley Dupre Playboy picture

Steven Seagal’s Accuser Liked to Jacket

Filed under: Steven Seagal , Celebrity Justice Kayden Nguyen — the girl who accused Steven Seagal of treating her like his sex toy — looked extremely professional when she applied to work for the action star … at least on paper. Kayden’s lawyer tells TMZ this photo of the 23-year-old former… Read more

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Steven Seagal’s Accuser Liked to Jacket

Bret Michaels: Recovering from Emergency Appendectomy

Bret Michaels is no strangers to doctors. Typically when he schedules an appointment to see them, however, it’s due to a burning sensation when he urinates. That wasn’t the case on Sunday night, as the rocker couldn’t make it through a concert in San Antonio. He was rushed to the hospital with stomach pains and underwent an emergency appendectomy. Fortunately, all went smoothly. Bret “remains in the hospital, is doing well and beginning the recovery process,” his rep says. He can resume inappropriate duets with 17-year olds some time in the near future. While the former Poison frontman “has been known to perform under extreme conditions,” his rep added, the insider also said his client will “have no choice but to reschedule some of his April tour dates.” Michaels is looking at bed rest over the next few days. But lying between the sheets, in an uncomfortable position, is nothing new for the singer. There’s just a promiscuous, drunk female underneath him most times.

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Bret Michaels: Recovering from Emergency Appendectomy

Lindsay Lohan Promotes 6126, Needs 5150

Lindsay Lohan was, at least at one point, a fairly successful actress. Now she’s doing all she can to eke out a living from club appearances and ventures like 6126. That would be Lindsay’s clothing line, and what a line it is. Calling them clothes is kind of a stretch if you think about it, since, well, look at the girl wearing them. She looks like she wants to ditch those clothes, do some lines of coke, and get naked as soon as humanly possible. You gotta love clothes made just to be torn off. Instead of 6126, they should rename it 5150, as in the code for involuntary psychiatric holds placed on hospital patients (a la Britney Spears ), ’cause she needs it. Here’s Linds modeling her line during a rare lucid moment of “work” … We can’t really say what marketing angle the pictures below are going for, other than “buy these clothes and look like a freaking train wreck like Lindsay Lohan.” Bet they’re flying off the shelves as we speak. For more hotness from the world of 6126, including a shot of our girl with her back to a stripper pole, just click to enlarge the Lindsay Lohan pictures below … For a wide variety of authentic celebrity fashions worn by your favorite stars, and possibly even Lindsay Lohan for that matter, be sure to visit THG’s new store !

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Lindsay Lohan Promotes 6126, Needs 5150

Arissa Luna picture

Arissa Luna is the girl mentioned by Xiaxue in her cyber blog war with Dawn Yang. Arissa Luna aka Arissa Cheo or Zhen Shan, born in Singapore on 30th June 1986 , currently live in Los Angeles, California, United State. Arissa Cheo (aka Arissa Luna, Cheo Zhen Shan) is the very pretty and sweet-looking 24 years old new girlfriend of Taiwanese Vanness Wu. Arissa Cheo was borned a Singaporean on 30 June 1986. She is currently based in USA at Los Angeles, California. Vanness Wu is the famous for

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Arissa Luna picture

Ashlee Simpson Shows Off her Useless Mom Legs of the Day

You know it is a boring day when I post pictures of Ashlee Simpson’s legs in pantyhose like shit is hot…a seriously boring fucking day…. The only thing partially hot about this girl is that she let a dude cum inside her, but when you remember it is Pete Wentz’s cum, it kinda ruins the excitement….and really most girls let guys cum inside them anyway, it’s one of those things that you find in nature and instinctively we do…and just because most girl’s I’ve fucked without a condom yelled at me everytime I did it on purpose but pretended was accidental, doesn’t mean there aren’t girls out there begging for loads to be dropped inside them to make them feel loved or some shit…and then there’s the whole baby has ripped that pussy apart shit…and her fucking busted up face that gives Jessica Simpson low self esteem because she can’t land a man but her baby sister can, not that Pete Wentz is a man, but you get what I am saying…. Here are the miserable pics…. Pics via PacificCoastNews

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Ashlee Simpson Shows Off her Useless Mom Legs of the Day

Tiki Barber Accused of Traci Lynn Johnson Affair, Dumps Pregnant Wife Ginny Barber

In his worst career move since retiring one year before the New York Giants won the Super Bowl, Today Show correspondent and former NFL star Tiki Barber has dumped his wife, Ginny, for former NBC intern Traci Lynn Johnson, reports say. Tracy Lynn Johnson is just 23. They have two sons already and Ginny Barber is eight months pregnant with twins. A twin himself, you’d think Tiki would respect that. Then again, maybe Ronde Barber is really the one cheating. Think about it. Ginny found out about the scandalous relationship late last year. Johnson, a model-thin bombshell, was photographed sitting next to Tiki at a Washington, D.C., screening of a documentary on Senegal that he hosted for the Travel Channel. Traci Lynn Johnson: Tiki Barber mistress. Giants fan. Sources believe Johnson also accompanied Tiki to Senegal for the filming late last year, when Ginny was three months pregnant. The affair is particularly stunning in light of Barber’s long-standing disdain for his philandering father. Barber’s confidants were shocked at his conduct. One said: “We were shocked to find out that he could walk out on his wife of 11 years while she’s pregnant with twins. He was with this girl in Senegal while Ginny was three months pregnant. And we believe she was also with him at the Olympics in Vancouver.” Barber, who is believed to have relocated to an Upper West Side bachelor paid, released a statement yesterday in response to the Post story announcing the split: “After 11 years of marriage, Ginny and I have decided to separate,” Barber said. “This decision was a painful one, but we are moving forward amicably and will continue to work together to raise our children with the love and dedication they have always known.” Tiki and Ginny Barber in happier times. Tiki had no additional comment. Ginny is a former fashion publicist and full-time mom to the couple’s two sons, A.J., 7, and Chason, 6. She also declined comment. Man, first Tiger Woods . Then Jesse James. And now this. Now many more celebrity cheating scandals can we take? Too bad Tiki’s not following them to sex rehab.

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Tiki Barber Accused of Traci Lynn Johnson Affair, Dumps Pregnant Wife Ginny Barber

American Idol: Paul Is Dead [Recaps]

Last night was Beatles night on America’s favorite county fair sing-off, because the girls who squealed for them on Ed Sullivan are now grandmothers, so it’s OK to karaoke their childhoods. Or something like that! Who knows. Ringo gotta get paid. Paul’s bored. And the other two have been oddly quiet since that rooftop thing. So that’s that. The Beatles . Here we go. It was a strange evening. Why so strange? Well, because there was some weird harasser in the back of the room who kept hooting things at Simon in the middle of his judging. And rather than have him dragged out by security and shot by Rickey Minor, they invited him up on stage to fondle the contestants and hoot some more. American Idol : Indulging schizophrenics since 2002. Good work everyone. It was also strange because I found myself… sort of respecting Kara DioGuardi’s mouth words . I know, I know. Rickey Minor is on his way over to drag me outside where I’ll be fondled to death by the hooting harasser for saying such a thing, but jut hear me out. She was sort of giving lucid commentary last night. I mean, compared to two of the other ones. Ellen just says “It’s nice!” and leaves it at that. And Randy furrows his brow and says “Yo, your pants and elephant rumpus were aight, crocodile friend, but piano gumbo soup, y’know?” And the contestants just nod and Ryan Seacrest clears his throat awkwardly and we move on. So compared to that, Kara kind of says things that are OK. Don’t worry, she’s still a hideous hose beast who’s almost as bad as Paula at concealing the fact that she wants to ride several of the male contestants like a petting zoo pony, but as far as criticism goes, she is the second best. It’s true. Ugh. I feel awful. I need something good in my life. Oh, here! The Good Extry, Extry, read all about it! Crystal Boomerslacks (that is a “humorous” nickname I use for Idol contestant Crystal Bowersox, hopefully that clears some things up ) performed well on American Idol last night! Come on boys, get yer papes here and be up on all the news! Boomerslacks does boffo! No, guys, I’m joking. It’s really not remotely surprising that Crystal Powderbox (that’s still Crystal Bowersox, Sonia) did well last night, or any night, because she is a professional singer and musician. And she is the only one of those on the show this season. Everyone else is like Milla Jovovich. It’s like “Oh, you were a model and now you have a fun little acting career going. You will never be Meryl Streep, but hey, good for you.” That is kind of what you say to everyone who isn’t Crsytal on this season. “Oh, hey look at you! Singing! And on this big show and everything. Nice job.” But you’re not really serious . No one will ever say “celebrated actress Milla Jovovich.” Just as no one will ever say “celebrated singer Aaron Kelly.” It’s just not going to happen. You feel me dawgs? So that’s that. And now I am about to say the second shocking thing of this recap. You know who else kiiiiiind of fell under the category of “The Good”? Katie Stevens. SHRIEEEEEEEK. I know. It is so horrible to say it. It is even horribler to think it, to have this wicked kernel rattling around my head. But it is, I believe, demonstrably true. Katie Stevens sang a ditty that was pretty and that feels shitty. She sang “Let It Be” and it was right in her vocal hot pocket and it sounded good. Because that is what Katie Stevens is. She is a balladeer. She should wear plumed tunics and carry a lute. The judges couldn’t believe it. “Holy potato dicks!” Ellen gasped. “Great conquering shit hats!!” Simon bellowed. “Taster’s Choice souvenir!” croaked Randy. They were just thunderstruck. Katie Stevens. Singing well. The mind reels. But then they collected themselves and decided to try and get her voted off, so Ellen was like “there is no wayyyy you’ll be in the bottom three tomorrow.” Aha! A tricky stratagem. She sang well. I hope she goes home tonight. The Bad What exactly was that that Michael Lynche did last night? This guy is trying so hard to have Moments that he seems to forget that people are watching this and would like, maybe, to be entertained. What they would not like is seeing someone taking a gorgeous song like “Eleanor Rigby” and shooting it right in the face and then taking the exploded brain and bone and face parts and smearing them everywhere while smiling and jumping around like a giant, drunk koala bear. It just doesn’t work. I don’t know why he did what he did to that song, but I don’t understand it. And can we talk about the jackets? Every week I feel like Michael Lynche is wearing a jacket with some kind of symbol or picture emblazoned on the back. Are they selling ad space there now? What is going on? His whole styling is such a mess. That wallet chain? What the Justin Theroux was that shit? Anyway. The judges liked it. He still pisses me off with his bad attitude, but what can ya do. I don’t even feel like there’s much to go into vis a vis the sizzling hot mess that was Andrew Garcia’s yellow shirt. Oh, yeah, his song was awful too, but that shirt! Holy skittles was that thing bright. And urgly. So very urgly. Oh well. He climbed his way back last week, and then he fell down again. “Can’t Buy Me Love”? Really, dude? That’s like the most boring, Paul Reiseryest Beatles song you can sing. No room for interpretation there. It’s all “Hello mother, I am playing an American guitar, but standing perfectly straight and wearing a suit. Rock and roll, mother!” Your Aunt Karen is starting to use the email, and she sent me a note the other day. And you know what she told me? Your cousin Phil Dweezy was feeling pretty special after his last performance on Idol Town and he wanted to, you know, keep the momentum going, but he just didn’t get it right. I don’t know, Auntie Karen said that he sang something about Jude Law or who knows what kinda song it was, but whatever it was Simon and Paula and Ryan really didn’t like it. Karen seemed pretty worried about him so I wrote back to her and I said “Keeks? You remember when Phil was about seventeen or so and he practiced pretty hard all summer to win that guitar contest they had at the school in the fall? Well he didn’t win that, Mike Doogan from over in Catasauqua did I think. But he still kept playing that guitar of his, and look at him now. He’s doing real well on Idols Forever . You just remember that.” So I don’t know, who knows if she’ll listen. She gets worried, you know. Always been a worrywart. Phil’s that way too I guess. Probably something to do with the accident. Anyway, whose stuff is this all over the table? Clean it up or have your sister do it if it’s hers, ’cause I’m not touching it. Siobhan Magnus, a feather duster that has come alive and is learning human language, sat on down and did a slow croon to “Across the Universe.” I don’t know. I guess she sang it fine. But there’s absolutely no power behind her voice. Oh sure when she’s wailing and gnashing as she’s wont to do she sounds Strong and Fierce and Independent, but when she’s just straight up regular singing? Nothin’. And she’s so overly earnest and nerdy. Something tells me that Siobhan would have been reeeeeeally annoying to go to high school with. Another bad thing about the performance was that she was wearing Miss Havisham’s bondage nightgown. It was unpleasant and trying way too hard. Guys, this girl is really wearing on me. Mirror Has Two Faces -era Barbra Streisand has decided to grow a little stubble and enter a singing competition and call herself “Casey James,” which is kind of fun. She doesn’t do terribly well on the show, though. Last night she sang a Beatles song no one had ever heard of that was mournful and slow and growly and it was just like, oh Barbra. The world wants “Funny Girl”! Instead we get Prince of Tides 2 . Shame. The Pixies Oh poor Aaron Kelly. That raggedy fool is just a toe up ball of awkward. So gangly, so clearly Facebook friends with Dorothy. And he does this thing when he’s singing where he sets his stance kind of wide (heh) and raises one hand. It’s maybe a little Bieber-y? Whatever it is, it is his Singing Pose and it feels so retro. Like Backstreet Boys retro. Here’s a solution to the Aaron Kelly Question. Put him in the touring company of Spring Awakening as one of the supporting kids. The director will hopefully beat that singing stance out of him and he can sing songs and do theater and meet a nice… friend. But this pop music star thing he’s currently taking a stab at? No. Timmela Urban got praise last night for singing a little-known Beatles song called “Hey Girls, Look at Me Smile.” It was tailor-made for him! Because there was no guest mentor this week, before every singer sang they showed a little package wherein the other contestants provided funny details about each other that the producers had told them to provide. For most people it was like “Oh s/he’s so good and has such a funny laugh. But yeah, so talented.” And then they got to Tim and everyone was like “He has such a nice smile.” That was it. Tim smiles. His pure-as-the-driven-snow face was chiseled out of a cheeseburger and he uses it to smiiiiile. Will he go home tonight? It’s possible. The judges did employ the Praise-Heap. But we shall see. OK. I think that’s it. What’d I forget?

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American Idol: Paul Is Dead [Recaps]

Elian Gonzalez 10 Years Later

Cuba releases new photos of now 16 year old Elian Gonzalez. Ten years ago Elian Gonzalez was found floating off the coast of Florida, after his mother drowned trying to reach the US. added by: tral81