Tag Archives: Jessica Simpson

Fashion Face-Off: Jessica Simpson vs. Audrina Patridge

Jessica Simpson and Audrina Patridge have a lot in common. Both break up with guys a lot, have large breasts, have little to no talent and are fixtures on celebrity gossip websites. They also have similar style! Simpson recently wore a Madewell romper with a denim shirt while arriving in N.Y.C., while Patridge kept a floral one-piece bare for shopping in L.A. Who looked better in this flowy, floral item? Vote below … Who wore this look better?

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Fashion Face-Off: Jessica Simpson vs. Audrina Patridge

Mischa Barton in a Wedding Dress Must be a Joke of the Day

This has got to be some kind of joke. I mean sure I’d marry Mischa Barton because I know she’s going to die soon, or at least that she’d be easy to manipulate into doing things for me, like buying me stuff and getting me into open-bar events, but I’m not really that picky when it comes to wifes, I just need to make sure the rent will be paid so that I don’t have to work, and whether they are fat, dirty and smell like they are rotten partially because they don’t believe in wiping their asses after taking sloppy malnourished shits, but also because they forgot a tampon inside them 6 months ago and haven’t been alert enough to realize it, I’m not complaining….but if I was a marketing person at a briday store, this would be the first person I would ask to “step away from the dress”, I mean other than Jessica Simpson, but that’s only because Jessica Simpson is fucking desperate…and could end up in some crazed rage, where as Mischa Barton just stains the shit and makes it unsellable, which is less dangerous..not that you care….or that I care…I mean seeing a bitch living out the fairy tale wedding she may never have thanks to impending death is nice…I mean maybe she’s out shopping for the dress she wants to be buried in, for when she marries God in heaven or something, who fucking knows….I just know she looks horrible…but maybe zombie brides get you off….and I’m just gonna post this, and ignore the fact that I posted this, cuz even I don’t understand why I did this…but I did it… Pics via Fame

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Mischa Barton in a Wedding Dress Must be a Joke of the Day

Jessica Simpson to Play Herself on Entourage

Jessica Simpson has landed a gig on Entourage. As herself. Not sure if she can handle that kind of acting pressure, but we’re very happy for her! The singer will appear on an upcoming episode, her rep confirmed. According to reports, the cast will sit around ogling Jessica Simpson pictures . Just kidding. She’ll be “caught between Ari [Jeremy Piven] and another agent.” Seems filming went well. “I have the utmost respect for the entire cast and crew of Entourage!” Simpson Twittered. “Thank you for making the past 2 days memorable 🙂 What’s left of Jessica Simpson’s career is at least nice to look at .

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Jessica Simpson to Play Herself on Entourage

Jessica Simpson Gives Me Something I Can Use

I’ve finally got some pictures of Jessica Simpson in a slutty little outfit, unfortunately she looks like a common streetwalker. Don’t get me wrong, if I could scrape together fifty bucks I’d be all over that, but she’s better than this. Her acting career hasn’t been doing all that well of late so maybe she’s just doing a cameo as a prozzy on Law & Order: SVU . Isn’t that what failed actresses do? I guess I should enjoy it while I can, think of it as role playing, she’ll dress up as a hooker and I’ll masturbate at home alone in my mother’s basement. Good times.

Jessica Simpson’s Sweet Golden Chubcakes

Here’s Jessica Simpson and her lovely chubcakes attending some event somewhere the other day looking, well, a little soft around the edges again. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t kick her out of bed for eating bacon, mostly because bacon is delicious, but also because she’s Jessica Simpson and we’ve been in love for a long time now. I’m not exactly pleased with the shot of her from behind, she looks a little like an old couch you’d see in a funeral home, all lumpy and uncomfortable. Not good.

THG Caption Contest Winner: April 30

Last week, THG readers were given the task of writing the best caption for this picture of Ellen DeGeneres, Jessica Simpson and whatever came to mind. Your winner for this edition of our Caption Contest is Caitlin . Congratulations! The winning caption appears below. Honorable mentions go to nowingsnow and Miranda Brown . Follow the above link for all entries. Thank you to everyone for playing and good luck next time! “Hmm, cheese graters and various cheeses? Sure, I’ll lend my name to that.”

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THG Caption Contest Winner: April 30

Jessica Simpson and Michelle Obama

Jessica Simpson was just one among many celebrities who came out for the annual event and mingled at the packed pre-party. Other starts included Sex and the City star Kristin Davis, Michael Douglas and Bradley Cooper. “I really do,” Simpson said before the White House Correspondents#39; dinner in Washington, D.C., Saturday. “She#39;s such an incredible woman, and she#39;s with such a powerful man.” Jessica Simpson is a singer, actress and reality star, but now she has a new goal: She wants to

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Jessica Simpson and Michelle Obama

Mel B Washes Her Hair Twice A Week

Former Spice Girls star Mel B has admitted she only washes her hair twice a week and likes her scalp to sweat. The 34-year-old singer, who now lives in LA with her husband Stephen Belafonte and her two kids, said her hair routine leaves her locks silky smooth according to UK newspaper Daily Star . “I only wash my hair twice a week and do a deep conditioning overnight mask that makes my scalp sweat, so you get all your natural oils back.” Wow, so gross. Who does scary spice think she is, Jessica Simpson?

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Mel B Washes Her Hair Twice A Week

THG Caption Contest: April 30

Welcome, readers, to The Hollywood Gossip Caption Contest , where you all try to think and post the funniest caption(s) for the celebrity photo below! Today’s subject? The legendary Jessica Simpson on the talk show circuit. What could she and Ellen be saying / doing? What would make a great caption? You tell us! Just click “Comments” and send in your caption(s) – as many as you like. We will announce the winner on Monday . Best of luck … go to it:

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THG Caption Contest: April 30

Jessica Simpson Gives Ellen A Stiffy

Here’s Jessica Simpson and her killer chubcakes on the Ellen DeGeneres show the other day surely giving Ellen a massive lady boner. I don’t know exactly what a lady boner consists of, but I know it’s probably weird looking. Anyhow, Jessica and her boobs have been all over the place lately promoting something I don’t care about, but if she wants me to help plug whatever it is, all she has to do is hit me up on the Twitter…. And show me those boobs. Just an email, I won’t show anyone else I promise.