These are some possibly old pics of a model named Shana Payet for BAMBI Magazine by a guy named Marijo Cobretti, because after staring at UK Tabloid Whore tits all day, I felt the need to purify my soul with a hot little hipster model in a hot little hipster photoshoot for the sake of fashion, or art, or whatever…that I am just happy isn’t tabloid for fame..but rather because girls like being in front of a camera…
Amy Adams is in the recent issue of LOVE MAGAZINE that shared a cover with Kendall Jenner, which is probably depressing for an Academy Award nominated actress I’ve never really heard of, but people seem to dig, even though I think she looks like shit, but maybe that’s jus the nature of this photoshoot, you know a little grimy, that’s the look they are going for, because she’s an actress and actresses can take on any role…or maybe she’s just not that hot… The point is that it has that voyeuristic, creepy American Apparel vibe…that makes you feel like you’re with a bunch of silly girls acting silly thanks to the drugs…playful and posing like a bunch of crackheads…and for some reason that is far more erotic than something glam and pristine. I like dirty and run down…it’s all I know….thanks to sex with discounted women…something we all know Amy Adams isn’t but plays up nicely when in fashion magazines. That’s why she gets paid the big bucks.
Hayden Panettiere is pregnant in a bikini. Call me old school but I am a firm believer that if you’re pregnant – you should not be in a bikini, but rather hiding out so that no one gets the wrong idea about you. More importantly so that we can try to forget you were ever pregnant – instead of having it burnt into our minds…with whatever the fuck this weirdness is…. All this to say, I don’t really like Hayden pregnant or not pregnant – and I don’t really like pregnant girls in general, especially not half naked, maybe my biological clock has ticked…and the idea of knocking a girl up disgusts me…even when I’m not the one who knocked them up… The world is doomed, it’s so easy to not make babies…and still be cummed inside…Get it together Hayden… TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE
I’ve been calling Kate Upton a pic since day one. I have been getting hate mail for calling Kate Upton a pig since day one. I was just fascinated how someone with average looks and a really shitty body could get as far as she did. Then I found out that her grandfather invented the Washing Machine, that she was rich as fuck, and I guess rich girls know people, and those people, hooked a sister up… So all my seemingly hateful things I said about Kate Upton, were really me just trying to make sense of her. Knowing tits that big would have a belly and ass that would catch up…but maybe, just maybe she’d take all the criticism to heart, stop eating, start working out and really show kids how to be hot and healthy all at the same time… But apparently, she was more into the cash grab, take all the jobs she can get and then land a pro Athlete, because they run in the same circles, seeing as she’s a Sports Illustrated model…then settle down and have kids because despite saying she’s 22, she has the body of a 38 year old about to use up her last egg… But here she is, walking the streets for the paparazzi…in what looks like Maternity wear….up on some Roseanne Barr during the fat years kick… Is it possible that she’s pregnant, or is she just fat? Who Knows. Who Cares…well I guess Justin Verlander from the Detroit Tigers does…. If you’re going to bet on anything, bet on the Detroit Tigers who are shown on Sports Book Review as 2-1 favorites tonight and not whether Kate Upton is Fat or Pregnant, because even if she’s pregnant – she’s still too fat to be a top model and with every picture taken of her – she mocks the entire industry. Now stare at her big everything.
Christina Aguilera is an ego, and in being an ego, figured she should get naked and show the world her pregnant as fuck body and her big dark mom nipples, because pregnancy is a great thing, at least for Christina Aguilera, since it’s a great excuse or reason for her being fat, where as when she is not pregnant, she’s gotta keep as much clothes as possible on, so that her harnesses and shaping SPANX don’t show when she’s on TV…distracting everyone with cleaveage…. In 1997…I thought Christina Aguilera was alright. I would have been into these kinds of pics…but it’s been 20 years. She’s a mom of 1 or 2 kids…She’s been obese for the last 5 years, except for the month before she got knocked up again. I have little interest in her or her nipples, it’s too much…too late…but I guess it would be a waste for me to not stare at them and try to get a boner like old times…
Nina Agdal is an overrated immigrant hooker who has managed to get into a pretty relevant magazine for Swimsuit companies, and thus has booked at least one or two campaigns, using her silly looking retard head, to sell bikinis….she’s also used that magazine to get herself unprotected sex with Adam Levine, tainting her amazing body, the only thing she had going for her…cuz that retard head is just too handicapped to really fall in love with…but I guess these are decisions people make for security, when swept up by the industry and made famous, especially when they are immigrants and don’t any better. They just hear American music and swoon, even shitty American Music like Maroon 5…so when she finally comes to America…she figures she should let America and the pop culture it pollutes the world with should come to her…it’s really just per being patriotic to her new home.. Either way, here she is in a bikini campaign and it’s boring as fuck.
Shay Mitchell is a Pretty Little Liar celebrity, and now she’s a “showing off her cleavage with dogs” fetish site star…not that there is a fetish site for girls with cleavage posing with dogs, but there could be one, since I know at least one person who would jerk off to this….and that person is me…but I’m not doing it because I am overwhelmed with the cuteness of dogs, or because my obsession for dogs has gone past the point of no return, you know into a deep dark place, all because humans are shitty and dogs are amazing…I am doing it because of #tits. So really, her social media posted cleavage could be in any setting, next to any animal, or inanimate object..It could be in old lady faces, or in her own hands…I will still look….and so will you.
The flaw in these pics of Zoe Saldana promoting whatever bullshit movie she’s in since Avatar made her famous – is that there’s no spread vagina in them. I know, I always say how shitty strategic or implied nudity, especially when it involves being full nude, because like you and everyone else…I want to see gash. But the reason it is so important to see Zoe Saldana’s Gash, is because she’s pregnant and based on THESE PAPARAZZI PICS – already showing… Meaning this naked body…and vagina that has yet to be mangled…but will be mangled…is already historic documents..and like all historic documents…they would be better with gash. Calling a vagina gash always makes me laugh. Here are the pics
People may not know this based on the bratty behavior of celebrities…but they all love attention. They only moved to Hollywood for attention. There is no talent, there is no passion, there is no art…there is just some asshole who thinks “I’m good looking enough and persistent enough to get myself in movies, make a lot of money and really just carry myself into retirement, because I’m awesome”…and idiots who do casting buy into the bullshit… Michelle Rodriguez is one of those people, so even with her not being all that famous anymore, she’s running around in a bikini, but more weirdly, creating this bikini videos of herself that remind me of a snuff film or shitty porn…and I’m not going to try to make sense of it, because I don’t care…but I know these motherfuckers love cameras and all of their phones must have so much self produced content of their narcisstic and vain selves…that it’d be disgusting…something I’d expect videos of Michele Rodriguez rolling around to be…only for some reason I dig em… To See Her in a Bikini FOR THE PAPARAZZI CLICK HERE
A week ago – Ashley Greene posted these picture of her on a trapeze, and apparently, the world was able to go on. I know, surprising, you’d think she’d have the star power to shut down the internet, but only 9,000 people liked the shit, I guess making her pretty obsolete…which I guess is a life lesson to all of you girls aspiring to whore yourself into fame…sure a bit part on a huge franchise is good for your bank account, and a fake relationship where you pretend to be a virgin with a Jonas brother is a good way to maintain that audience…you know keep them engaged…but the second it is all over…it is over…because people have no attention span, fame is fleeting, and this bitch isn’t talent and doesn’t matter. She just knows how to strategically fuck, despite her “Promise Ring” she pretended to once have…when the only promise she made was to take it on the face if she got the part… If you want to see Ashley Greene Paid By Target to Shop at Target…it’s a fetish to at least one person CLICK HERE