Epic Meal Time are hometown heroes. The host was a stoner in his basement playing video games who decided to make a pizza out of fast food and now he’s a youtube millionaire making ridiculous breakfast sandwiches with Arnold Swartznegger… for what I assume is a Charity…or an ad…but still pretty hilarious. I don’t really keep track of the web series but that doesn’t mean I don’t like the host, or more importantly his hot mexican girlfriend….but this was blowing up my Facebook, and I got a kick out of it, because Arnold is fucking ridiculous…
When you are old and tired…from what, I don’t know,..it’s not like Emmanuelle Chriqui works…but her face sure as hell looks like it has survived Holocausts like it’s Jewish Grandparents…you make sure to wear a ridiculous push up bra to distract from the fact that you’re pushing 40… She’s a local girl, born in Montreal…and she make stye Jewish Moroccan community proud enough for me to celebrate her tits, and not bother talking about how this Entourage movie she’s on may be a disaster since no one really wants to see a bunch of 40 year olds ripping lines and fucking young girls…or old girls like Emanuelle Chriqui trying to stay young because that’s the only acting jobs she gets…and really who cares..there’s cleavage and I like cleavage..and so do you.
Aubrey O’Day is no longer fat…but the better news is that she’s no longer relevant… Seriously, this hardly famous, had sex with Diddy when she was on a reality show, who gained 60 lbs to cater to the black market as a meaty white girl they liked…has gone back to white, has gone back to fitness, and has a pretty rocking’ body with a set of stupid fake tits that would be celebrated if she actually mattered…but rather will look nice when she finally turns to porn because that burning desire to be famous is still in her…and the only way to get it will be to stick things in her…yay..
I don’t know the story behind this girl getting punched in the face by a cop, I just know it happened at a high school and that the girl was resisting arrest, but seriously, he’s a cop and should be able to handle a teen girl without punching her in the fucking face… Guy throwing up only for a girl to slip on it… Here’s an armed robber getting owned…
I love that Bride Magazine did this profile on Hayden Panettiere who is either engaged or married…because I know that her fan base is mainly weirdos who watched her on Heroes, or whatever it was called, where they’ve been loyal followers of hers ever since…because that’s how sci/fi people work…but more importantly, they never turn their back on a hobbit looking bitch…because there’s so many sexual fantasies they can have with her…until today..when she is posing in Wedding dresses…for a Wedding Magazine…to remind you she’s getting married…only for you to get so angry, like when you found out Mila Kunis was engaged, because without her marriage there was still hope for your unemployed, living in your mom’s basement, virgin loser ass…
Her name is Rosalind Lipsett….I follow her on INSTAGRAM …I’ve talked about her before…you know who she is…and if you don’t you’re an idiot…but we already know that… That said, she is an Irish bikini model, who lives in LA and who stripped down into a bikini for a Spring Break themed shoot…that unlike actual spring break, that is is happening in colleges across the nation the next few weeks…don’t smell like all the date rape and new herpes outbreaks that happen when half naked and drunk idiots come together for organized parties…during a season that tarnishes the genitals of many young people, the season that accounts for a lot of Plan B sales, the season that guidos work out all year for….but rather smell quite lovely, like a dream, and not just because she is an Irish girl who looks amazing in a bikini…and who is tanned….and lovely…when all the Irish girls I’ve seen are fat, scary, booze soaked monsters, while Rosalind…is a fantasy…the pot of gold at the end of a rainbow…the leprechaun I only see when I do narcotics…the fantasy that based on these pics…is a fucking reality… I hope to see a lot more of this one… FOLLOW ROSALIND ON INSTAGRAM
Sara Malakul Lane is this amazing creature and I call her a creature because she’s half asian, and asians are robots or aliens…but that doesn’t mean they aren’t good to have sex with, in fact, it makes them better… She was a soap star or child star in Thailand, and now she’s in America…hopefully for the fat people…and not fame and fortune…because under that assumption and as a fat person…I can give her all she needs…totally ready to suffocate on her while she’s sitting on my face…I can pretend her ass is an all you can eat buffet….and if I die in the process…I’ll be glad it happened…I’ve been trying to eat myself to death for decades…this would be a good end to a horrible story…. That said, she hasn’t necessarily made it as a huge A List start, but that doesn’t mean she won’t…she’s just getting started and she’s making a movie a month…more importantly…she is one of those big breasted asian actors totally eager and willing to get naked in movies because it is sure as hell better than doing Thai Ping Pong shows, at least according to her and not me, because according to me, life would be better if I could buy you for 5 dollars an hour, instead of staring at screen and renting her movie Jailbait for 5 dollars…because some of us still rent DVDs…the Video Store is the one place you can find girls who aren’t uppity… Here are a bunch of the nudes from the movie..because that is the kind of acting I’ve always loved.
I am not getting paid by Nina Agdal or by Carl’s Jr…so I have no idea why I am posting their commercial…a commercial that they produced for the sole purpose of paying TV and Youtube to play in front of videos…for everyone to be annoyed by but for everyone to accept as all part of the distribution of media because it is important that all these people make billions of dollars selling to companies who make billions of dollars…all by brain washing us with models who probably make 1000 dollars a day, and only work 10 days a month…. I mean seriously, I am posting a fucking commercial for free…that they have a multi million dollar budget to spend on…and I am acting like it is news…because there’s a fucking bikini model for Sports Illustrated in it…what the fuck. I just bought into their scam…but in my defense, I am more into the burger in her panties that Adam Levine ruined…but that’s just because I like tainted meat, it’s always more affordable…and tasty…
Michelle Rodriguez and Cara Delevingne are on a lesbian vacation in somewhere tropical..and they are posting pics of themselves topless and naked…because they love the attention they are getting being “lesbian”…even if they aren’t actually in a relationship and just doing it for attention…and even if they are actual lesbians…or even just bisexual girls partying and having fun…eating each other’s asses…neither are hot enough for you to care about…even if one of them is an It Girl and they other is a big lesbian movie star…but I’ll post it anyway…because I like the industrial self contained breathing apparatus Cara has for going down deep in that hispanic mud…
