Tag Archives: Sexy Stars

Kate Upton is a Beached Whale in a White Bikini of the Day

As you may or may not know, 21 year old Kate Upton has seen better days. Unfortunately, pop culture hasn’t really caught onto how fat and weirdly shaped she is, and dudes everywhere thing her sloppy tits, weird hips, and dumpy ass are worth celebrating, making her one of the top paid Swimsuit models that even the fashion magazine are picking up, despite being as boring and horrible looking as she is. That awkward body needs to be put out to pasture or shot for her meat…you know to feed a starving African village that loves chubby blonde girls with tits. To me, she represents all that is wrong with hormones in the food. She’s got the obesity gene and despite fighting it off as hard as she can, obesity is winning, and bitch is a fucking bikini model… I get people like curves, but these aren’t curves, this is like a fat girl who has melted into some kind of sloppy pile…. She’s now getting gigs in movies…it freaks me out…because I just don’t get it… Overrated, but in her defense, ugly chicks get laid too….they even get married…clearly dudes are easy to please but shit still confuses me…and here’s the reason why. TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS FOLLOW THIS LINK

See more here:
Kate Upton is a Beached Whale in a White Bikini of the Day

Taylor Swift is Giving Me Boners of the DAy

What happened to this awkward nerdy hundred millionaire in her oversized clothes and sneakers making her long lean model-like body look like some kind of lanky character in a sitcom that always falls all over herself… I just don’t know… But I do know that I like it. It’s like the weird girl makeover that happened in every Teen Comedy of the 90s, only real life. Take off the glasses, apply some make-up, put her in a hot dress, let down her hair, and boom, all of a sudden babe. I heard she’s gonna be in Canada this weekend, too bad I’m too lazy, cuz otherwise I’d totally stand out her hotel waiting for an autograph in the form of herpes…you know the real fan kind of autograph that you can’t frame, but you can remember forever. Taylor Swift, I love you. TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS FOLLOW THIS LINK

See original here:
Taylor Swift is Giving Me Boners of the DAy

Fitness Model Michelle Lewin Does the Black Tape Project of the Day

The black tape project is some high concept art project that I guess involves dressing girls up in black electrical tape, which I guess when styled by artists is far more fashionable that the tape I usually use on girls, duct tape, but that’s usually only temporary, you know to keep the screams in…and sometimes, if they are really feisty, to prevent running away or clawing at my sexual advances.. I’m joking people, I don’t use tape, rope is far better and the roofies usually keeps the screams down. I’m joking people, I’m believe in chivalry and no sex before marriage. Rape is for prison. Her name is Michelle Lewin, I have no idea who she is, but here she is wearing black tape and it’s hot.

Here is the original post:
Fitness Model Michelle Lewin Does the Black Tape Project of the Day

Kate Upton’s Awkward Body Body Painted of the Day

I don’t know the source of these pictures, I just know the person should be taken out back and shot, and by person, I mean Kate Upton, because she’s built like a farm animal, and her prime is long gone, she’s already run her best race, and won her last prized pig at the fair ribbon, and it’s time to put her to pasture like the cow that she is… I don’t mind looking at her massive sloppy tits, but I don’t think she should be getting paid the millions she gets paid to show her tits… But then again, I have no power, no control, so I might as well just accept it and go along with it…even though it is horrible.

Go here to see the original:
Kate Upton’s Awkward Body Body Painted of the Day

Lily Aldridge in Some Victoria’s Secret Catalog Shots of the Day

Lily Aldridge is really not that hot. I am looking at these pics, that are photoshopped from the latest Victoria’s Secret Catalog and her face and body are not all that great. I mean this is Victoria’s Secret, and she’s holding down the whole team, you know a roster of amazingness, is only as strong as the weakest link. Sure her body isn’t fat, it’s kinda ripped in a good way, she’s a Victoria’s Secret model, all she has to do is stay fit…but that face, it is hard, it has fake lips, it’s just fucking bullshit, bullshit that I can only assume came from fucking the right guy in a band, like the serial groupie she is, or maybe just knowing the right people… All this to say, she doesn’t deserve it, and here are her pics to prove it.

View post:
Lily Aldridge in Some Victoria’s Secret Catalog Shots of the Day

Naked Subway Man Is the Best Thing On the Internet Ever of the Day

I have no idea what is happening in this video, but a girl gets assaulted by a crazed naked dude who does hand stands on turnstiles, and despite all the tears, I found great joy in this…. I mean he’s just a misunderstood crazy person, just looking for hugs and a good old fashioned acrobatic workout….rollin around on the floor, having a good old fashioned time… The world’s gone nuts…and it’s a lot of fun.

Read the original post:
Naked Subway Man Is the Best Thing On the Internet Ever of the Day

Naked Subway Man Is the Best Thing On the Internet Ever of the Day

I have no idea what is happening in this video, but a girl gets assaulted by a crazed naked dude who does hand stands on turnstiles, and despite all the tears, I found great joy in this…. I mean he’s just a misunderstood crazy person, just looking for hugs and a good old fashioned acrobatic workout….rollin around on the floor, having a good old fashioned time… The world’s gone nuts…and it’s a lot of fun.

Read the original post:
Naked Subway Man Is the Best Thing On the Internet Ever of the Day

Natasha Barnard for GUESS of the Day

Natasha Barnard, not to be confused with Natasha Barn yard the pig you lost your virginity to, cuz you dad caught you playing with barbies and he couldn’t have that….is a Guess model, following the footsteps of such great models as Anna Nicole Smith, only unlike Anna Nicole Smith, this Natasha Barnard is not dead and thank god for that, because it would make jerking off to her way creepy….

Originally posted here:
Natasha Barnard for GUESS of the Day

Zuzana Kopuncova in Bathing Suits of the Day

Zuzana Kopuncova has the name of a girl who should be locked in the basement of a stripclub in some Eastern European city. You know, because she was abducted or sold to the MAFIA by her father to pay off some kind of debt, or because the MAFIA was looking for some young, tight pussy, to work their CAM companies for free, or at least to save their parents from being killed off. But instead, this Zuzana Kopuncova, is just some lovely Slovakian, 5 foot 10, goddess, all long and lean, because she’s a model, modelling bathing suits, all thanks to the fall of communism, because without the fall of communism, she’d be sewing work uniforms in a factory for 1 dollar a day, and that would be a waste of such amazingness…

See more here:
Zuzana Kopuncova in Bathing Suits of the Day

Cindy Crawford Making Out With Herself for MUSE of the Day

Cindy Crawford is a fucking dream. I know I am supposed to be disgusted by old ladies, but this one, this one’s special and not even because I used to jerk off to her in the 90s when she was supermodeling, but because I crossed paths with her once, and her “it factor”…the same “it factor” that made her a celebrity in the first place…pretty much melted my soul. I guess some people just have an energy, or what it takes to win the people around them over, and some people, like supermodels, no how to make love with their eyes, and pretty much ruin anything in a 10 block radius. Seriously, after the day I crossed paths with her, I’ve never been the same, no girl has been close to this greatness, and all the bitches I fucked, despite having no standards, were that much more unappealing. I am a fan of this shoot for the latest issue of MUSE…but more importantly, I am a fan of ejaculating on printouts of it…because that’s as close as I’ll get to this loveliness.

Originally posted here:
Cindy Crawford Making Out With Herself for MUSE of the Day