We’re not cinema snobs here at Skin Central- all we ask is that a movie include some boobs (or butts, we’re not picky). In fact, we’re willing to let a lot go if a pair of pontoons are involved. That’s why we’re so excited about the nominees for this year’s Razzie Awards , a yearly, shall we say, celebration of the very worst in motion pictures. With the exception of Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star (2011), which features funbags from Meredith Giangrande (above), all of this year’s Worst Picture nominees are non-nude. So hate away, Skin fans…just leave Meredith and those Giangrandes alone! See more of the nominees from this year’s Razzie Awards after the jump!
Congrats aren’t just in order for the winners of tonight’s Film Independent Spirit Awards ; major props go to Adam Sandler for an outstanding showing in today’s Razzie nominations announcement, which found the Jack & Jill / Just Go With It star breaking the previous record for most personal Razzie nominations earned in a year. (Sandler won 11 nominations, while Jack & Jill itself earned 12.) Eddie Murphy , guess you’re off the hook for the Year of Norbit . See the full list of fairly obvious nominees vying for Golden Raspberry (dis)honors after the the jump and leave your predictions below. WORST PICTURE Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star Jack & Jill New Year’s Eve Transformers: Dark of the Moon Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1 WORST ACTOR Russell Brand, Arthur Nicolas Cage, Drive Angry 3-D / Season of the Witch / Trespass Taylor Lautner, Abduction / The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Pt. 1 Adam Sandler, Jack & Jill / Just Go With It Nick Swardson, Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star WORST ACTRESS Martin Lawrence, Big Mommas: Like Father Like Son Sarah Palin, Undefeated Sarah Jessica Parker, I Don’t Know How She Does It / New Year’s Eve Adam Sandler, Jack & Jill Kristen Stewart, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Pt. 1 WORST SUPPORTING ACTOR Patrick Dempsey, Transformers: Dark of the Moon James Franco, Your Highness Ken Jeong, Big Mommas 3 , Hangover Part 2 , Transformers: Dark of the Moon , Zookeeper Al Pacino, Jack & Jill Nick Swardson, Jack & Jill / Just Go With It WORST SUPPORTING ACTRESS Katie Holmes, Jack & Jill Brandon T. Jackson, Big Mommas 3 Nicole Kidman, Just Go With It David Spade, Jack & Jill Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Transformers: Dark of the Moon WORST ENSEMBLE Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star Jack & Jill New Year’s Eve Transformers: Dark of the Moon Breaking DawnThe Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Pt. 1 WORST DIRECTOR Michael Bay, Transformers: Dark of the Moon Tom Brady, Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star Bill Condon, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Pt. 1 Dennis Dugan, Jack & Jill / Just Go With It Garry Marshall, New Year’s Eve WORST PREQUEL, REMAKE, RIP-OFF or SEQUEL Arthur Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star The Hangover 2 Jack & Jill The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Pt. 1 WORST SCREEN COUPLE Nicolas Cage and anyone Shia LaBeouf and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Transformers: Dark of the Moon Adam Sandler and Jennifer Aniston/Brooklyn Decker, Just Go With It Adam Sandler and Holmes, Pacino, or himself in Jack & Jill Kristen Stewart and RPattz or Taylor Lautner, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Pt. 1 WORST SCREENPLAY Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star Jack & Jill New Year’s Eve Transformers: Dark of the Moon The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Pt. 1 The Razzies will be announced on April 1. More info here .
Tune into the boob tube this week for more Shameless, featuring the naked stylings of Emmy Rossum and Laura Wiggins . On DVD, Meredith Giangrande will make you grande in Bucky Larson, and Lynn Whitfield bares boobs with bananas for The Josephine Baker Story.
Anyone who tells you that receiving a tattoo like the dragon design occupying a quarter of Rooney Mara’s back in The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo will not hurt is a liar. Nevertheless, he’s a competitively priced liar, according to a new survey of tattoo artists asked the simple question: “How much would it cost to buy a dragon tattoo?” Mike Ryan shopped around this week on the streets of New York, finding estimates ranging from $500 to $1,200 and three different replies to the other critical question in the process: “Will it hurt?” Ha! Of course it will hurt : I spoke to artist Daniel Cotte, whose estimate came in quite a bit higher than those of his competitors. “You see,” Cotte said as he pointed at the picture of Rooney Mara’s back, “there’s a tail on the dragon that snakes around and out of view.” That detail, he explained, makes the dragon tattoo much more expensive — and much more painful. He put the price of the dragon tattoo somewhere between $800 and $1,200, and he definitely recommended coming in for two separate sessions — adding up to four hours in all. Now you know. Find slightly more optimistic estimates at the link below. NOTE: “I AM A RAPIST PIG” tattoos remain free of charge.
Depending on your conspiracy theory of choice, the world may end 11 months and change from now, give or take a few days. And just in case all of those qualified real scientists are wrong about the 2012 doomsday being complete hooey, we’ve got filmmaker Roland Emmerich ’s 2009 opus 2012 on hand to guide us for the potential cataclysm ahead. So grab a notepad and jot down the 18 or so essentials you’ll need to start stockpiling if you’re going to be ready to face down ultimate destruction, John Cusack -style. The fictional 2012 opens as the Earth’s core is being heated by a freak solar flare, which accelerates a shifting of the Earth’s crust. The resulting shift triggers earthquakes and tsunamis across the globe, leaving humanity’s only hope in a series of massive arks constructed to hold survivors… just not everyone. But them’s the breaks. Look, none of us know if we’ll make it onto greedy Oliver Platt’s ginormous boat, so it’s best to come prepared. 1. Emergency kit with the essentials – water, non-perishables, batteries, a radio, perhaps a few magazines for light reading 2. Early investments in steel and titanium interests 3. Decent relationships with your baby mama/daddy 4. A Mayan calendar 5. Disaster insurance 6. Beer 7. A limo with tires with good traction for outrunning earthquakes, family in tow 8. Advanced degree(s) in geology, astrophysics, or international relations 9. Mace for keeping the weirdo pirate radio jock you meet in the woods at arm’s length 10. A private airplane to fly your family to China as America crumbles into the sea 11. Flying lessons 12. Small fortune for buying your way onto life-saving arks at one billion euros a ticket, or 13. High level government clearance assuring privilege of being saved (also works in case of Contagion ) 14. Mountaintop real estate in Africa 15. A houseboat 16. Camping gear 17. A submarine or two 18. Swimming lessons, if all else fails Your mileage may vary with the above, but remember what’s really important in times of crisis as we wait to see if Emmerich was the mystical sage I’d like to think of him as: Family. And not wetting the bed. And also looking cool while evading lava and earthquakes and tsunamis. Let’s circle back on 12/21/12 and see where we’re at. Like the Boy Scouts say, be prepared…
The annual critical powwow that is Slate’s Movie Club is currently underway, with that site’s Dana Stevens leading a conversation between a redoubtable quartet also including Michael Phillips, Dan Kois and Movieline’s own Stephanie Zacharek. What’s on the agenda? To date, topics discussed include:
Happy Wednesday! Also in today’s edition of The Broadsheet: The man who helped make cinema safe for the counterculture has died… Kenneth Branagh’s back-up plan… Apologies worth considering… and more.
Much has been made of British actor Henry Cavill ‘s abs in this week’s Immortals , or the strange, logic-defying Superman beard spied on the set of Man of Steel . Never mind that the 28-year-old actor turns in a persuasive dramatic performance in Tarsem ‘s stylized fantasy myth, playing the classic hero Theseus as an honorable peasant battling a sadistic god-hating tyrant (Mickey Rourke) with the aid of a comely priestess (Freida Pinto) and supernatural bow and arrows. But therein lies the surprise: Go to Immortals for the bloody action, or the mythological spin, or the wonderment of Tarsem’s visuals, and you’ll also get the pleasant revelation that Cavill wears leading man status like a natural.
Here’s what I’ve gathered from the new Snow White and the Huntsman trailer: Charlize Theron ‘s Evil Queen is pissed, Kristen Stewart ‘s Snow White is innocent, and the color saturation of this fairytale world looks like a Crayola-dappled Middle Earth. Pretty spectacular.
Despite all of the grumpy and/or gleeful speculation that arose around the internet when it got its first glimpse of Adam Sandler donning a wig and falsies to play his own awkward twin sister, Jack and Jill is not actually the worst movie of all time. Given other recent efforts from Sandler’s Happy Madison production company, most notably Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star , it’d be hard pressed to even compete for the title of worst of the year. The film, directed by longtime Sandler collaborator Dennis Dugan and written by Steve Koren, presents an at least theoretically standard mix of slapstick, celebrity cameos and not-quite-winking sentimentality. It’s sometimes funny, but more often it’s just very strange and threaded through with hostility — at one point, during a montage that involved Jill repeatedly accidentally injuring a myopic Mexican grandmother at a picnic, the colleagues on either side of me leaned in separately to whisper, ” What is happening ?”
