Los Angeles traffic is famous for getting rotten when big happenings hit town, but George Clooney ‘s fundraising bash for President Obama promises to make the Friday commute even more dreadful. And so, in the grand tradition of traffic-paralyzing presidential visits of the past (or: Obama-jams!) and 2011’s infamous “Carmageddon” (remember that?), POTUS’s social visit tomorrow to Clooney’s canyon pad — for a $40,000-a-plate shindig expected to raise $15 million for the Obama re-election campaign — has a name: Starmageddon . “Obama at George Clooney’s house: Neighbors brace for starmageddon” screamed a headline yesterday in the Los Angeles Daily News/Silicon Valley Mercury News ), kicking off a catchword frenzy. The visit to Clooney’s Studio City home marks the president’s first non-studio trip to the Valley, notes the paper. As for the traffic madness that may or may not ensue, Los Angelenos with places to be should avoid the following places on Friday evening: LAX, where Obama lands around 6pm; Studio City/Laurel Canyon north of Ventura Blvd., where Clooney’s party will have street closures in effect from 5pm to 8pm; and Beverly Hills later that night, where the President is reportedly staying. And if you’re lucky enough to live close to Clooney, be prepared to show I.D. to access your own home from 8pm to 10pm that night. “Starmageddon” is a fitting name for the star-studded Hollywood-meets-Washington affair — Clooney and Obama, joining forces for the future of America. If there was an asteroid hurtling toward earth, is there any question that these two could save us all? I mean, obviously. Then again: I can’t be the only one imagining Clooney dancing animal crackers up and down Obama’s belly as the plaintive wailing of Steven Tyler fills the air. (Do you think it’s possible that anyone else in the world will be doing this very same thing at the very same moment tomorrow night?)
It’s really easy to be cynical about horror movie posters. Most of them are garish, Photoshop nightmares unworthy of a second look. But we really owe it to ourselves to bask in the sublime surrealism of the one-sheet for The Possession . A poster like this one, for a low-budget horror film with a decent pedigree (Sam Raimi is among the producers) that will play as late-summer counterprogramming in multiplexes around the country, comes around, oh, never. I’ll grant you that it is of questionable construction. It’s flat and nearly monochromatic, the Photoshop is sloppy in spots (especially where the wrist meets the mouth), and it feels like a detail from the poster for another Raimi film, Drag Me to Hell : Still, there’s beauty in the simplicity. Take away the title, taglines, and credit block and you instantly know this is a person-possessed movie. No weird upside-down people , no impossible-for-even-the-most-elastic-yogi posing , no one stuck to the ceiling — just a person being mauled from the inside out by a demon clawing its way out of that person’s maw. Any other image meant to illustrate “possessed” looks like unicorns and rainbows in comparison. And why not? Reality is always stranger — and scarier — than fiction, and, my God, this really happened! Somewhere, out in the world, someone is telling the story about that time a girl they knew vomited up a gnarled ghoul hand that then ripped her face off. That’s the takeaway, anyhow, when “Based on a True Story” is placed above the poster’s horrific, inspired image. It’s an audacious juxtaposition. For nearly a decade, horror movies brandishing their ripped-from-reality bonafides have hewed to relatively realistic depictions of their content. The Exorcism of Emily Rose , for example, is atmospheric and unsettling in its depiction of a girl lost in foggy desolation. Similarly, the remake of The Amityville Horror exists in a scuzzy, off-balance suburbia, but it’s one that feels relatively in-step with our world. Even the ridiculous, porny poster for The Devil Inside feels grounded in some perversion of reality. Not so for The Possession . It’s a true story spewed forth from the interior worlds of Lovecraft and Dalí. Our first instinct is to laugh at the absurdity of selling a movie using this image as “based on a true story.” But disbelief quickly gives way to something like awe. On one hand it’s a complete inversion of how to market a real-person-possessed movie. Instead of people contorted by unseen supernatural forces — that is, something we can go in believing actually happened — we’re getting a person brutally face-hugged by a tangible hellspawn, a practical and realistic impossibility that subverts the scare power of these sorts of movies. It’s not frightening, after all, if we know it can’t really happen. (Shock cuts only go so far.) On the other hand, it’s a deft commentary on these kinds of films. We all know they’re ridiculous. But you’d never know it to look at their posters. From the images to the copy, they’re humorless voids of self-righteousness, like an ad for a sanctimonious documentary or a foreign art-house film. Except these are ads for movies about a kid puking, what, smoke? A scarf? Oil? Liquid gold? Or being suspended upside down, against one’s control . And on and on. The Possession one-sheet, in the grand Raimi tradition, is self-aware and calls attention to how ridiculous it all is while simultaneously giving us a good, solid modern horror movie image. I’d be surprised if the image on this poster is ever brought to life in The Possession (but here’s hoping!), and time will tell how grossly it misrepresents the tone and content of the film. But all that seems beside the point when you have a poster of such sly wit and artistry. PREVIOUSLY IN ONE-SHEET WONDER The Simple, Fan-Driven Pleasures of Moonrise Kingdom ‘s First Poster Dante A. Ciampaglia is a writer, editor and photographer in New York. You can find him on Twitter , Tumblr , and, occasionally, his blog .
It’s really easy to be cynical about horror movie posters. Most of them are garish, Photoshop nightmares unworthy of a second look. But we really owe it to ourselves to bask in the sublime surrealism of the one-sheet for The Possession . A poster like this one, for a low-budget horror film with a decent pedigree (Sam Raimi is among the producers) that will play as late-summer counterprogramming in multiplexes around the country, comes around, oh, never. I’ll grant you that it is of questionable construction. It’s flat and nearly monochromatic, the Photoshop is sloppy in spots (especially where the wrist meets the mouth), and it feels like a detail from the poster for another Raimi film, Drag Me to Hell : Still, there’s beauty in the simplicity. Take away the title, taglines, and credit block and you instantly know this is a person-possessed movie. No weird upside-down people , no impossible-for-even-the-most-elastic-yogi posing , no one stuck to the ceiling — just a person being mauled from the inside out by a demon clawing its way out of that person’s maw. Any other image meant to illustrate “possessed” looks like unicorns and rainbows in comparison. And why not? Reality is always stranger — and scarier — than fiction, and, my God, this really happened! Somewhere, out in the world, someone is telling the story about that time a girl they knew vomited up a gnarled ghoul hand that then ripped her face off. That’s the takeaway, anyhow, when “Based on a True Story” is placed above the poster’s horrific, inspired image. It’s an audacious juxtaposition. For nearly a decade, horror movies brandishing their ripped-from-reality bonafides have hewed to relatively realistic depictions of their content. The Exorcism of Emily Rose , for example, is atmospheric and unsettling in its depiction of a girl lost in foggy desolation. Similarly, the remake of The Amityville Horror exists in a scuzzy, off-balance suburbia, but it’s one that feels relatively in-step with our world. Even the ridiculous, porny poster for The Devil Inside feels grounded in some perversion of reality. Not so for The Possession . It’s a true story spewed forth from the interior worlds of Lovecraft and Dalí. Our first instinct is to laugh at the absurdity of selling a movie using this image as “based on a true story.” But disbelief quickly gives way to something like awe. On one hand it’s a complete inversion of how to market a real-person-possessed movie. Instead of people contorted by unseen supernatural forces — that is, something we can go in believing actually happened — we’re getting a person brutally face-hugged by a tangible hellspawn, a practical and realistic impossibility that subverts the scare power of these sorts of movies. It’s not frightening, after all, if we know it can’t really happen. (Shock cuts only go so far.) On the other hand, it’s a deft commentary on these kinds of films. We all know they’re ridiculous. But you’d never know it to look at their posters. From the images to the copy, they’re humorless voids of self-righteousness, like an ad for a sanctimonious documentary or a foreign art-house film. Except these are ads for movies about a kid puking, what, smoke? A scarf? Oil? Liquid gold? Or being suspended upside down, against one’s control . And on and on. The Possession one-sheet, in the grand Raimi tradition, is self-aware and calls attention to how ridiculous it all is while simultaneously giving us a good, solid modern horror movie image. I’d be surprised if the image on this poster is ever brought to life in The Possession (but here’s hoping!), and time will tell how grossly it misrepresents the tone and content of the film. But all that seems beside the point when you have a poster of such sly wit and artistry. PREVIOUSLY IN ONE-SHEET WONDER The Simple, Fan-Driven Pleasures of Moonrise Kingdom ‘s First Poster Dante A. Ciampaglia is a writer, editor and photographer in New York. You can find him on Twitter , Tumblr , and, occasionally, his blog .
Sony debuted the first poster for Rian Johnson’s Looper , which feels like its been in the works for something close to ever but nevertheless has nearly six months remaining before it comes to theaters on Sept. 28. In the meantime, here are its stars doing their best playing-card imitation. Jack of hearts? King of clubs? Enh, forget it. Also: Wouldn’t What to Expect When You’re Expecting benefit from this kind of more… painterly Photoshop? Just throwing that out there. [ /film ] Follow S.T. VanAirsdale on Twitter . Follow Movieline on Twitter .
Coco is ridiculous but you don’t need me to rip into her…it’s all be said before. She’s a hooker, she found a john who is into it, who happens to be rich and famous, and who has the ability to help her put herself out there, like the hooker she is, cuz that’s what he likes about her. She looks like a clown, is tacky as fuck, she’s not hot, but haggard, as most retired hookers are, but yet she brings the fucking goods…..in the last week….3 pics of her half naked, and that’s better than any bitch I sext with does….and although she’s made of plastic, is dumpy and short, has fake hair and bad make-up…..that’s some good fucking output….and to hate on any bitch taking pics of her ass and tits…is to hate on the beauty of sluts and all things needed for us to jerk off. Let Coco go down in history as the hero she is destined to be…..and here are those 3 pics from her twitter the last 3 weeks…..cuz she’s a whore….who like all whores…thrives off the attention she gets from her whoring….you know cuz it’s nice to feel like your hard work is valued and appreciated….
Erin Heatherton is a Victoria’s Secret model who is normally photoshopped to the tits in bras that make her look like she has tits…and not just these little round amazing likely implants tits….you know rocking those shitty catalog shots for Victoria’s Secret…..but she decided to say no to the make-up artist, the professional photographer, the photoshop, the lighting and the money, and give us a free glimpse into the real Erin Heatherton, secure with herself cuz she’s a fucking Victoria’s Secret model, working for fucking free….making this the equivalent of running into Frank Sinatra busking in the subway station…pre-death….if you know what I mean…..only far more sexually arrousing, despite being far less interesting….Who fucking cares about this bullshit….it’s a bitch who’s life and career is about being half naked….half naked…in shit quality pics…fuck her.
On the eve of a new trailer debut, Marvel has released a new poster for May’s superhero superteam pic The Avengers . Here you’ll find all your favorite heroes gathered in various states of action and repose: There’s Black Widow ( Scarlett Johansson ) stalking her prey while Hawkeye ( Jeremy Renner ) contemplates a sandwich, with Captain America ( Chris Evans ) having a senior moment in the background as Iron Man ( Robert Downey Jr. ) hogs the spotlight. Typical . Get a full look at the cut & paste wonderment after the jump. Also wedged into the same blue-tinged, explosion-filled background by Marvel’s resident Photoshop intern: Mark Ruffalo ‘s Hulk flailing for a way out (of this poster), Chris Hemsworth ‘s Thor pouting through a bad hair day, and Sam Jackson as Nick Fury looking like he belongs in an altogether different movie. Say, a serial killer cop crime thriller about a one-eyed detective who does things his own way? Starring Ashley Judd, perhaps? Meanwhile, over in the U.K. the film’s title has undergone a revamping; it will henceforth be known across the pond as Avengers Assemble , ostensibly to avoid confusion with the 1960s British spy series, and probably the subsequent Uma Thurman-starring feature-length bomb that followed in 1998. Marvel Studios presents in association with Paramount Pictures “Marvel’s The Avengers”–the super hero team up of a lifetime, featuring iconic Marvel super heroes Iron Man, the Incredible Hulk, Thor, Captain America, Hawkeye and Black Widow. When an unexpected enemy emerges that threatens global safety and security, Nick Fury, Director of the international peacekeeping agency known as S.H.I.E.L.D., finds himself in need of a team to pull the world back from the brink of disaster. Spanning the globe, a daring recruitment effort begins. Starring Robert Downey, Jr., Chris Evans, Mark Ruffalo, Chris Hemsworth, Scarlett Johansson, Jeremy Renner and Samuel L. Jackson, and directed by Joss Whedon from a screenplay by Joss Whedon, “Marvel’s The Avengers” is based on the ever-popular Marvel comic book series “The Avengers,” first published in 1963 and a comics institution ever since. Prepare yourself for an exciting event movie, packed with action and spectacular special effects, when “Marvel’s The Avengers” assemble in summer 2012. The Avengers is in theaters on May 4.
It’s turning out to be a great year for nudity at Sundance- or as I like to call it, Skindance- this year. First we got nudes of Laura Prepon’s nude debut , and now our Skin Skout has sent us this breaking nudes from Park City: Gentlemen, Lake Bell has officially broken the seal. After finally making her nude debut last year on How to Make It in America , she’s following up with a topless scene in the thriller Black Rock. Lake, Kate Bosworth , and The League ‘s Katie Aselton (who also directed) co-star as old friends forced to run for their lives on a hiking trip. Bosworth keeps her boulders in her bra, but Lake and Katie both bare boobs as they strip out of their wet clothes 52 minutes in, marking Lake’s second career nude scene and Katie’s nude debut . But that’s nothing compared to Helen Hunt , who returns after five years of non-nude fare like Soul Surfer (2011) with a fantastically full-frontal turn as a sex therapist in The Surrogate . We counted four skinstances of Helen’s cunt (a first for the As Good As It Gets star) in the nudity report, along with an impressive nine breast-baring scenes. She’s Mad about Pubes…and so are we! For more breaking nudes from Sundance, check our reviews of festival flicks 28 Hotel Rooms , V/H/S, and Simon Killer right here at MrSkin.com!
It’s turning out to be a great year for nudity at Sundance- or as I like to call it, Skindance- this year. First we got nudes of Laura Prepon’s nude debut , and now our Skin Skout has sent us this breaking nudes from Park City: Gentlemen, Lake Bell has officially broken the seal. After finally making her nude debut last year on How to Make It in America , she’s following up with a topless scene in the thriller Black Rock. Lake, Kate Bosworth , and The League ‘s Katie Aselton (who also directed) co-star as old friends forced to run for their lives on a hiking trip. Bosworth keeps her boulders in her bra, but Lake and Katie both bare boobs as they strip out of their wet clothes 52 minutes in, marking Lake’s second career nude scene and Katie’s nude debut . But that’s nothing compared to Helen Hunt , who returns after five years of non-nude fare like Soul Surfer (2011) with a fantastically full-frontal turn as a sex therapist in The Surrogate . We counted four skinstances of Helen’s cunt (a first for the As Good As It Gets star) in the nudity report, along with an impressive nine breast-baring scenes. She’s Mad about Pubes…and so are we! For more breaking nudes from Sundance, check our reviews of festival flicks 28 Hotel Rooms , V/H/S, and Simon Killer right here at MrSkin.com!
Gawker seems to have bought it , but our Photoshop experts here at Skin Central have declared this pic of ” Juliette Lewis ” screwing fashion photographer Terry Richardson an unequivocal fake. Why? First, check out the obvious Photoshop lines on either side of “Juliette”s torso and beneath her butt cheeks. Second, check out a pic of the real Juliette’s jugs (like, say, in 1995’s Strange Days, 1993’s Kalifornia , or any of her other eight nude roles here at Mr. Skin), and you’ll see that the real Ms. Lewis’ nips are meatier and her areolas smaller than her look-alike’s. There’s no denying that it’s one hell of a photo, but we’re sorry to say- that ain’t Juliette Lewis and a dick. See the whole XXX enchilada after the jump! Pic courtesy of totallynsfw.com
