Obviously supermodel Irina Shayk isn’t actually blowing me kisses, I’m not an idiot, she’s just implying that she wants to kiss me by posing like this on the red carpet. Right? When a woman like this assumes this kind of position, all puckered up and making sexy faces, it’s nice to fantasize about her squishing her lips up against the inside of my computer screen as she tries to make out with me. Leave the two of us alone please.
