I don’t know who this Xenia Deli chick is, she just came into my life today, but I’m beginning to think she’s the hottest woman on the planet. I know that might seem rash considering this is the first time I’ve ever seen her, but I want to make a good impression so that maybe she’ll send me some nudes on Twitter or invite me to some sort of supermodel party where all the women are topless and they have one of those chocolate fountains I can dip fruit into. Call me.