Tag Archives: how-miserable

Rachel Bilson Looks Different in Cosmo Australia of the Day

The cute girl from The O.C. is starting to look like a Real Housewife of wherever the fuck she’s a housewife…I’m thinking it’s in Canada on some farm somewhere, because that’s what someone I know who fucked her husband’s sister told me…which makes sense since the Husband hasn’t got work since the last Star Wars…and has to make sure his woman doesn’t get tempted by actors who can actually call themselves actors…rather than dudes who have just acted…if you know what I mean…..not that her kidnapper is really that interesting or worth talking about….when she’s in shorts in cover on a magazine….like this was still 1999….when her botox face tells us it totally is not….good times.

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Rachel Bilson Looks Different in Cosmo Australia of the Day

Miranda Kerr in some Wedding Lingerie Catalog Shots of the Day

As much as I hate the idea of marriage and pregancy and family and commitment thanks to my horrible wife..and the life sentence she is…I really don’t mind looking at or even fucking other people’s wives…because I can tell how miserable they are in their situation and I don’t mind being so bad in bed with them to bring them hope in their old life and realize “hey, it’s not so bad with this asshole, compared to that Jesus Martinez motherfucker”….I am so good at it…I could start a marriage counseling company where my sole job is to fuck a dudes wife to make her love him again….but apparently it’s illegal to do that…. That said, here’s Miranda Kerr in some tacky, trashy, marriage lingerie…or lingerie you put a girl in to role play wedding night….god knows why you’d do that…cuz I hear that’s normally the last blowjob a man gets….

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Miranda Kerr in some Wedding Lingerie Catalog Shots of the Day