Only a few days after Against Me!’s lead singer Laura Jane Grace came out against the casting of Andrew Garfield in their video for “We Exist,” Arcade Fire‘s frontman and the video’s director have come forward to explain why they decided on the “Amazing Spider-Man” actor to embody the trans character of Sandy. It all… Read more
Fans submitted questions about Laura’s new transgender life and the future of the band … here’s how they answered. By James Montgomery Laura Jane Grace Photo: When Against Me! agreed to sit down with MTV News for their first on-camera interview since frontwoman Laura Jane Grace announced she was transgender, they made two things abundantly clear: No topic was off limits, and they wanted to hear from their fans. And all week, we’ve been rolling out prime examples of the former — Laura’s frank discussion of her life-long struggle with gender dysphoria , her bandmates’ acceptance of her new life, and the painful process of coming out to family and friends. But today, we’re going to focus on the latter. Because we asked AM! fans to submit questions for Laura and the band, and they delivered. And, true to their words, Against Me! answered as many as they possibly could (they did have to soundcheck for the night’s gig). And we can think of no better way to wrap up the week than by bringing those answers to you now. From questions about how Laura’s new life will affect Against Me!’s new album — “It’s a huge part of it,” bassist Andrew Seward said, though Laura was quick to add “I think it’s up to us to make a record that speaks for itself” — to how her life would have changed if she’d been born a woman on the outside (“I think I probably wouldn’t have gotten arrested so many times when I was younger,” she laughed), the band’s fans made it clear that, not only have they been following this story from the beginning, but they can’t wait to see what happens next. Tellingly, though, we received questions from young men and women who, like Laura, were struggling with their own gender — many of whom now look up to her as a role model. And as she did throughout our interview, Laura did her best to answer with the kind of humility and honesty that made our chat so compelling in the first place. “I’ve been completely blown away; the most amazing part for me is the amount of trans men and women who have been coming out to the shows and meeting them after and talking with them. I’ll have a lot of them come up to me and be like ‘It’s amazing, what you’re doing, and I look up to you so much,’ ” she said. “And it blows me away, because I look at them, and they’re so much further along in their transition, and it’s like ‘What you’re doing for me, by being here right now, is beyond whatever you think I’m doing for you.’ Just being able to make that connection … because I had no friends in that world. And to make those connections, that is half of what I wanted to accomplish by coming out, to be part of that community.” Related Videos Laura Jane Grace: Her Life, Her Words Related Artists Against Me!
In first interview since announcing she’s transgender, Against Me! singer talks with MTV News about painful past, new life and future of her band. By James Montgomery Laura Jane Grace Photo: This is the story of a woman named Laura Jane Grace, who was born in the body of a boy named Tommy Gabel, and spent the next 31 years of her life trying to get out. It starts a long time ago, back when Gabel was 4 or 5 years old and had just watched a televised performance by Madonna. It was the moment Laura first let herself be known, when the boy who spent skinned-kneed summers dressed as a cowboy or Superman realized she was not actually a boy at all. And not surprisingly, given her strict upbringing on military bases across the South (Gabel’s father is a retired Army major), she didn’t understand how to process this rather pertinent bit of new information. All she knew was that, for the first time in her life, she felt somehow different. “When you’re younger, you don’t necessarily get it, [but] I just completely identified with Madonna,” Laura admits. “Watching ‘Rosemary’s Baby,’ and seeing Mia Farrow with a boy’s haircut, was another moment I remember thinking, ‘That’s me, that’s what I’m going to grow up to be, that’s the kind of woman that I’ll be.’ ” Of course, over the next 20-something years, a life like that seemed impossible. Gabel’s parents got divorced, and she moved to Florida with her mom. As a teen, she lived with a secret shame, experimenting first with cross-dressing — then eventually graduating to drugs and alcohol — as a way of coping with what is clinically known as gender dysphoria, one’s discontent with the sex they were assigned at birth and the gender roles associated with that sex. But back then, without the Internet and only films like “The Silence of the Lambs” to serve as reference points, Gabel felt like she was some kind of pervert or a freak. And the kids she went to school with didn’t do much to dissuade those feelings, picking on her and calling her a “f—-t.” She hated the way she looked, hated the way she felt and, above all else, hated herself. It was, needless to say, the low point of her story. About this time, Gabel also discovered punk rock, mostly as a way of fighting back. She’d begin writing songs in her bedroom, using the name Against Me!, which she now admits was a nod to her gender issues, and at 18, she moved to Gainesville, Florida, to form a band. Over the next decade, she’d get married (and divorced), live a life of anarcho-punk austerity, tour the world with Against Me! and even get signed to a major label. She’d begin to pepper AM! songs with references to her secret, and at points, she’d even swear off cross-dressing and do her best to bury her transgender feelings. But no matter how much she tried, she just couldn’t do it. “You don’t understand what’s happening to you … though, as you grow older, you realize this isn’t something that goes away,” she says. “When you’re younger, you have these moments where you’re like, ‘OK, I’m going to choose to be male. I will be male. This is it. I’m going to take all my women’s clothes that I have secretly hidden away under my bed, and I’m going to put ’em in a garbage bag and I’m going to throw them in a dumpster, and that’s it. I swear off this behavior for the rest of my life.’ “And then you get to that point where you’re like, ‘This isn’t something that’s going away,’ ” she continues. “And you start hearing so many other people’s stories, and you realize, ‘That’s me. This is what I’m going through.’ And it becomes so apparent that you’d be a fool to continue to deny it.” For Laura, the end of the denial began in 2009, when, newly married and with a daughter on the way, she began to realize that she could no longer continue living two lives. “I couldn’t exist as a woman in hotel rooms by myself and then come home and pretend to be someone else,” she now admits. “I’d end up killing myself.” She decided to finally reveal her secret. Over the next year, she first came out as transgender to her wife, Heather, then her Against Me! bandmates, and finally, the world, via a much-publicized feature in Rolling Stone magazine. And in doing so, she not only became the most prominent artist to live openly as transgender , but for the first time in her life, she felt unburdened. And free. “I was really, honestly excited. When I first told my wife, immediately it was just like this huge weight being lifted off my shoulders, and subsequently every other person that I’ve told, that feeling was more and more there,” Laura says. “I’ve been completely blown away by the majority of people’s reactions. … They’ve been more than respectful and more than supportive, and it’s been, for me, completely humbling.” In the month since the Rolling Stone story broke, Laura Jane Grace has begun hormone treatments and returned to the stage with Against Me! And before their show at New York’s Terminal 5 — where they’d be joined by Joan Jett for a cover of the Replacements’ “Androgynous” — Laura and the band sat down with MTV News for their first on-camera interview. For an hour, they spoke openly and honestly about the state of the group and the fallout from Laura’s revelation. There were jokes about personal pronouns and applying makeup in the back of the tour bus, touching moments of brotherly (and sisterly) love — “She can take care of herself,” beefy guitarist James Bowman laughed, when asked whether the band felt the need to protect Laura — and a general camaraderie that, for an act with as tumultuous a history as AM!’s, was positively revelatory. In every conceivable way, they seem like a new band, one as free as Laura herself. “We didn’t want to make it melodramatic. … It was kind of simple in a way,” bassist Andrew Seward says. “It sounds cheesy, but it’s not: You just want your friend to be happy. When this came out, I think the bottom line for all of us was just ‘be happy.’ ” “I’ve been a jerk over the past few years. I’ve been an absolute ass in so many ways, just from, you have this thing you’re dealing with that you don’t know how to process it, and it bears on you,” Laura adds. “And it comes out in so many different ways. … You express your anger at what is going on, and you take it out on your closest friends. And now, I’ve obviously apologized.” And it’s about the only time she’s apologized for anything. Laura admits that her new life hasn’t been accepted by everyone — “It’s completely ended my relationship with my father,” she says — but after 31 years spent wrestling with the supposed shame and stigma of gender dysphoria, she’s finally found happiness in honesty and the supreme freedom of living life on her terms. And she’s never going back now. In a lot of ways, Laura Jane Grace’s story is only just beginning — and we’re honored to be able to tell the next chapter. Of course, Laura isn’t too concerned with any of that. She doesn’t want to be mythologized and isn’t interested in being seen as a transgender icon. Instead, she just wants to enjoy living a life unburdened. And really, she’s earned that. “I never thought any of this would be possible. It was just something that, conceptually, I could never realize. But … my life improves every single day. I try to make a step every single day, no matter how big or how small,” Laura says. “It feels like I’m in control of my life, and I’m in control of my person, and that’s empowering. Saying to someone ‘I’m a transsexual’ is the most empowering thing I’ve ever felt in my whole life.” Related Videos Laura Jane Grace: Her Life, Her Words Related Artists Against Me!
Gabel reveals plans to Rolling Stone to take the name Laura Jane Grace after undergoing gender transition. By Katie Byrne Tom Gabel of Against Me! Photo: Kevin Winter/ Getty Images Against Me! singer Tom Gabel has come out as transgender and discussed plans to begin living as a woman in the next issue of Rolling Stone. Gabel, who will go by Laura Jane Grace and remain married to wife Heather, will undergo electrolysis treatments and take hormones to make the transition from male to female. “For me, the most terrifying thing about this was how she would accept the news,” Gabel told Rolling Stone of Heather. “But she’s been super-amazing and understanding.” Gabel has dealt with gender dysphoria for years and decided it was a good time to speak up about the private struggle, telling only a few family members and friends about the upcoming transition before talking with the magazine. “I’m going to have embarrassing moments, and that won’t be fun,” Gabel said of coming out. “But that’s part of what talking to you is about — is hoping people will understand, and hoping they’ll be fairly kind.” Though Gabel is the first major rock star to undergo a gender transformation, she’s hardly the first celebrity. Larry Wachowski, half of the Wachowski-brother directing duo behind the “Matrix” trilogy, has been credited as Lana Wachowki in recent work and seems to now identify as a woman, though neither sibling has spoken publicly on the subject. Chaz Bono, meanwhile, made a very public run on “Dancing With the Stars” as the first transgender contestant . Chaz, born the daughter of Cher and Sonny Bono, underwent female-to-male gender transition between 2008 and 2010. In the next issue of Rolling Stone, due Friday, Gabel will tell her full story, including what the revelation means for the future of Against Me! Related Artists Against Me!
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