Tag Archives: teaches-young

Brooke Burke Junk in the Trunk of the Day

One thing I hate about mainstream media is the shitty, clever, bullshit puns that they apply to their stories… Like looking at this Brooke Burke digging through the junk in her trunk, while wearing leggings, that would make someone, like a dad, say “look at her junk in her trunk”….leading me to use it as the headline…making me just as pathetic, uncreative, and lame as them…everything I always hated…I have become.. But in my defence, Brooke Burke doesn’t inspire me to tell stories of partying around the world like she did for a cable network, before settling down and having a bunch of kids…probably because she settled down and had a bunch of kids…making her, even if still kinda hot like her Playboy past, a married mom…no one should care about…and probably don’t….but she’s got junk in her trunk. TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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Brooke Burke Junk in the Trunk of the Day

Gwen Stefani and Sarah Hyland for Cosmo of the Day

Gwen Stefani and Sarah Hyland did Cosmo. They probably have nothing to do with one another….but they are in the same issue…so maybe that means they are Cosmo issue sisters…if that is a thing…which I doubt it is, but should be… Now, I don’t know what the fuck I am talking about, or why, I just know that Cosmo teaches young girls how to fuck, because instead of it’s intended purpose of being an opinion magazine, it became smut in the 70s, which snowballed while teaching girls how to snowball… That said, Here’s Gwen Stefani: And Here’s Sarah Hyland: Don’t ask me why, because I am so not interested in this for so many reasons….let me list 10 of them… 1- I didn’t like Gwen Stefani when she was young and famous, I thought she was a man. 2- I have never seen an episode of modern family. 3- Sarah Hyland creeps me the fuck out with her weird underdeveloped tween face 4- Sarah Hyland gets restraining orders, I hate girls like that 5- Gwen Stefani’s husband fucks me, so maybe he thought she was a man too. 6- These pics aren’t spread eagled or lesbian sex filled 7- fuck this top 10 list….up the ass like it was Gwen Stefani’s husband.

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Gwen Stefani and Sarah Hyland for Cosmo of the Day