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‘Piranha 3D’: The Reviews Are In!

Critics cite ‘mayhem,’ ‘gore’ in new horror flick. By Eric Ditzian Jerry O’Connell in “Piranha 3D” Photo: Gene Page / Dimension What can a critic possibly say about a film whose director describes his creative approach thusly: “I understand why James Cameron in ‘Avatar’ didn’t want to make the 3-D gimmicky, and he was right. But we are making a piranha-attacking-spring-break movie, so we are going to go for the huge on-the-screen effects and fish attacking the audience.” That’s how Alexandre Aja explained “Piranha 3D” to us earlier this year. And his movie is either the type of cinematic experience you crave — buckets of blood, tons of silicone — or the type that you find emblematic of the unraveling of Western culture. Moviegoers in both camps should note that the film is not tracking particularly well and will be lucky to gross more than $10 million over the weekend. Yet the “Piranha 3D” reviews have been largely positive thus far; critics seem to understand that Aja wasn’t trying to make an awards-season darling (despite ). Check out what the pros are saying and decide whether or not this flick is for you. The Story “[T]here’s a lake packed with drunk hotties in bikinis they’re forever taking off. There are big piranha packs swarming. A few scientists stop by to throw in lines like ‘you’re not going to believe this.’ A few law enforcements types scream, ‘Get out of the water now.’ Mayhem everywhere, enough that the fake-blood and severed-limb budget was probably the film’s biggest expenditure. I’d try describing the gore, but words just can’t do justice to the damage a massive Mesozoic underbite, and the occasional outboard motor, can do.” — Betsy Sharkey, Los Angeles Times The Direction “Alexandre Aja, who worked his remake magic with 2006’s atmospheric ‘The Hills Have Eyes,’ gets it mainly right, assisted by a lively CG boost and a game cast that really gets into the spirit of things. … [He] exhibits little patience for such stuff as dramatic tension and tautly coiled suspense, and there are some undeniable choppy bits— but he never loses sight of the potential fun factor laid out in Pete Goldfinger and Josh Stolberg’s script. Nor does he stint on the gore, with a terrific assist by the veteran effects duo of Greg Nicotero and Howard Berger, who truly outdo themselves with all those nibbled body parts, as well as added bite by creature designer Neville Page.” — Michael Rechtshaffen, The Hollywood Reporter The Performances “The cast knows exactly what they’re doing, and Elizabeth Shue and Adam Scott both walk away winners. Scott in particular seems to be having indecent fun striking a few action hero poses and reacting with droll alarms to the monster fish. Christopher Lloyd shows up for what is really just an extended cameo, but every line out of his mouth gets a laugh just because of the general lack of Lloyd in our lives lately. Ving Rhames doesn’t have a lot to do, but he goes down swinging. O’Connell may never be able to convincingly shake off the scumbag after the enthusiastic way he and his cameraman (Paul Scheer of ‘Human Giant’ fame) ply their trade and earn their punishment. Even the young cast, led by Steven R. McQueen and Jessica Szohr, acquit themselves as well as possible considering how generally thin the material is.” — Drew McWeeny, HitFix The Gore “There’s no way you can talk about the film without going gore gaga over the main attack that hits during the wet t-shirt contest. I’m relatively positive that this film used more blood than any film in film history. I’m thinking elevator scene in ‘The Shining’ … times 3,000. More than that though was the crazy awesome gore by [effects studio] K.N.B. There’s crazy awesome make-up effects here that just don’t stop. For every moment that the CG fish get on your nerves, there’s six gore gags by K.N.B. that are just epic.” — Harry Knowles, Ain’t It Cool News The Bottom Line “[H]ere, in the best/worst traditions of ’70s exploitation cinema, are flesh-eating fishy gore, lip-smacking nudity and lots of laugh-out-loud silliness. If you’re looking for the anti-establishment message found in the John Sayles’ scripted, Roger Corman-produced ‘Jaws’ rip-off, you will be disappointed. However, the re-make’s cheesy, eye-popping 3-D effects — flayed bodies, naked breasts, vomit and a severed penis are all flung out of the screen — are an authentic, affectionate throwback to cheapo Cormanesque excess.” — Nigel Floyd, Time Out London Check out everything we’ve got on “Piranha 3D.” For breaking news, celebrity columns, humor and more — updated around the clock — visit MTVMoviesBlog.com . Related Videos MTV Rough Cut: ‘Piranha 3D’ ‘Piranha 3-D’ Clips

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‘Piranha 3D’: The Reviews Are In!

‘Jersey Shore’ High Five: Sammi’s Done, Or Is She?

We look back at the five best moments from this week’s episode. By Jim Cantiello Ronnie and Sammi on Thursday’s episode of “Jersey Shore” Photo: MTV Sammi and Ronnie are … Are we really still talking about this plotline? Whatever, here are our five fave moments from this week’s “Jersey Shore.” #5: Jersey Gets Schooled With September quickly approaching, the “Jersey Shore” cast had a very special message for viewers about education. “I don’t take tests,” Ronnie told Sammi when she said she’d been testing his loyalty. “I hate tests. That’s why I didn’t go to college.” And upon meeting some cute law school students, Vinny declares, “I don’t want girls studying for finals. I want girls studying for d—!” Stay in school, kids! #4: No White Clothing Before Labor Day? We don’t really want to touch Sammi and Snooki’s conversation about the dangers of wearing white, but we would like to offer one more concern: You know what else ruins white clothes? Fake tanner. #3: Dinner for Schmucks Kudos to MTV producers for housing the “Jersey Shore” cast in a Rube Goldberg machine. That slapstick scene of sauces falling, milk jumping and champagne cork’s flying called for a special dance remix. ( Catch the results in the video .) #2: Snooki’s New Man Snooki’s boyfriend back home suuuucks. But don’t feel too bad for her. We’re pretty sure she’s already moved on to her new man, Lotso from “Toy Story 3.” #1: She’s Done Sammi’s done, you guys. And so are we! What was your favorite moment from this week’s “Jersey Shore” ? Talk about it in the comments. Related Videos ‘Jersey Shore’ High Five Highlights Jersey Shore (Season 2) | Ep. 4 | Breaking Up

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‘Jersey Shore’ High Five: Sammi’s Done, Or Is She?