Tag Archives: all-essentially

NFL Cheerleader Accused of Grabbing 12 Year Old’s Penis of the Day

Best news story ever…or at least for today: A former NFL cheerleader has been charged with aggravated sexual battery after allegedly grabbing a 12-year-old boy’s penis outside his pants … and attempting to perform oral sex on him. 42-year-old Elizabeth Garner — who cheered for the Tennessee Titans until 2009 — was also charged with solicitation of a minor for rape of a child. According to law enforcement, Garner — who is married — is accused of following the 12-year-old to the bathroom during a party last month hosted by the boy’s mother, grabbing his penis over his shorts … and attempting to remove them in order to perform oral sex on him. The boy escaped, told his mother what happened … and the mother then informed authorities. According to police, the boy said Garner asked if he’d ever been with a woman. During a police interview, cops claim Garner willingly admitted she approached the boy … but said she was drunk and had confused him with an (adult) man at the party. (We’ll see how that defense pans out.) I wish shit like this happened when I was 12, but I was always the kid no one wanted to molest. I appreciate her excuse “I was drunK”….which legally doesn’t really hold much of a defense when in court and being charged for sex crimes, like meeting a 17 year old off the internet in Florida one night after she seduced you on chat for the authorities…you know telling you what you want to hear….entrapment. I also like “I thought it was an adult” cuz 12 year olds and 40 year old men have so much in common in terms of their build now with all the hormones in the food. I mean at the point between tapping him on the shoulder and asking him if he had been with other women before trying to suck him off, you’d think she’d realize he was 12. Who are we to judge, maybe they do things different in pre-Teennesee. More importantly, she’s a fucking ex NFL cheerleader, who looks like a hooker, it is not like she’s some top grade morally sound citizen…. Still a good story for her to tell her grandkids about one day.

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NFL Cheerleader Accused of Grabbing 12 Year Old’s Penis of the Day

Girls Aloud Final Performance of the Day

Girls Alound have broken up…. I am going to assume no one really gives a fuck. I mean they were a one hit wonder band in the UK from a decade ago that I am going to guess very few people have actually heard. The only real reason we know who they are is because Cheryl Cole, the hot as fuck one, the babe with prison tats, pulled a Beyonce. She married a famous footballer and looked good while doing it, getting her in the tabloids and on some Simon Cowell tv shows, because they vacation in Barbados together. They are old, tired, boring, but I’ll predict they’ll be back, one day in the future, when a group of Japanese kids find one of their old albums and re-invent them like they were Abba or the Beegees. Bitches like this do anything for money. I mean, they are all essentially strippers who lucked out to begins with. That said, if you’re not too sad to click this link… HERE ARE PICS OF THEIR LAST PERFORMANCE I’d say it was the end of an era, but it’s really not. This break-up will have zero effect on the music or entertainment scene in any fucking way. So long friends, may your journey be filled with hooking, in some capacity or another.

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Girls Aloud Final Performance of the Day