Tag Archives: bazaar-brasil

Behati Prinsloo for JCrew Swimwear of the Day

OMG!! Call the fucking police – Behati Prinsloo is cheating on Victoria’s Secret with J Crew…in some kind of underground model trading underworld I will never understand because the only models I know are airplanes…that I build….while trying to pass the lonely days as I wait for death…unless you count crackhead meth addicts who fuck you for 10 dollars as models, which luckily I do…. Either way, these are as exciting as nonsense bikini pictures go….which is real fucking exciting if you’re easily excited and don’t need throat fucking porn to be entertained…

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Behati Prinsloo for JCrew Swimwear of the Day

Alessandra Ambrosio for Vogue Brasil of the Day

In case you were wondering, Alessandra Ambrosio, unlike the girl I saw at the Airport in a Wheelchair….has LEGS…. Legs that I would love to wear as a scarf, you know so that mom pussy acts as a gas mask for me to try to breathe into…even if it is so far dead and a lost cause…I am willing to try…I have hope…because unlike other mom pussy this one’s ass has bounced back from the pregnancy…and that is good enough.

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Alessandra Ambrosio for Vogue Brasil of the Day