Tag Archives: eat-vegetables

Reporter’s Uranus Joke of the Day

This reporter is wrong…I like to think that my favorite kind of lettuce is the lettuce grown on an anus…but only if the anus belongs to a used up street hooker…because that’s the kind of anus you can expect produce, usually mushrooms, to be growing on…which is ironic because they generally don’t eat vegetables as it gets in the way of the meth… The post Reporter’s Uranus Joke of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Reporter’s Uranus Joke of the Day

Reporter’s Uranus Joke of the Day

This reporter is wrong…I like to think that my favorite kind of lettuce is the lettuce grown on an anus…but only if the anus belongs to a used up street hooker…because that’s the kind of anus you can expect produce, usually mushrooms, to be growing on…which is ironic because they generally don’t eat vegetables as it gets in the way of the meth… The post Reporter’s Uranus Joke of the Day appeared first on DrunkenStepfather .

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Reporter’s Uranus Joke of the Day

Michelle Obama’s Top 10 List of Gardening Facts

While Rush Limbaugh mocks Barack Kardashian, the First Lady of the U.S. is staying out of the political fray and focusing on her new book about gardening. Michelle Obama, who’s been promoting her new book about the White House garden and healthy eating, appeared on the Late Show With David Letterman. Here are her “Top Ten Fun Facts About Gardening” from Tuesday … Michelle Obama Top 10 List Gardening was invented in 1822 by Albert Gardener. Plant avocados, tomatoes, onions and cilantro together and grow a guacamole tree. Eggplants were originally cultivated for use as doorstops. In his lifetime, the average American will eat half a radish. The largest zucchini ever grown contained a Starbucks. Later this year the Supreme Court will finally rule on “tomato” vs. “tomahto.” If you have an actual green thumb, it might be scurvy. Lettuce is 96 percent water and 4 percent lettuce. The White House tool shed contains shovels, trowels and Weed Whacker One. With enough care and effort you can grow your own Barack-oli. Her campaign for home-grown diets and to fight obesity has already shown progress. Earlier this year, Michelle even got Jay Leno to eat vegetables . Not a small feat.

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Michelle Obama’s Top 10 List of Gardening Facts

Kate Moss Topless Outtake for Terry Richardson of the Day

Kate Moss has been getting naked for fashion….and even for fun….when on vacation on yachts…or when having unprotected sex with needle sharing rockstars…for a long fucking time…and I’ve been admiring from cuz I am a creep and because I find her hot…. I like her so much that I even did a 38th Birthday Nipple Retrospective ….. Making this Terry Richardson topless outtake barely interesting considering what she’s done in the past…but still topless enough for me to stare at for a couple hours when I have nothing else going on….

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Kate Moss Topless Outtake for Terry Richardson of the Day

Miss USA 2012 Swimsuit Ready Abs for National Donut DAy of the Day

It is National DOnut Day….. The last thing you fat american trash neeed is a National Donut Day….you need a “National Jog 5 Miles 3 times a week and eat vegetables and fruit instead of fast food 6-12 months”…until your fat, disgusting, fast food eating, trans fat sucking, high fructose corn syrup, sodium addicted, cellulite ridden size XXL ass turns into a fucking athlete. It is a marketing hook for the billion dollar corporations killing you and your kids….and you all get sucked in like crack addicts… You’re better off smoking bath salts and eating each other… Either way, Miss Connecticut USA, Miss Iowa USA, Miss New York USA and Miss Washington USA demonstrate their favorite ab workouts to show how they get in shape for the Swimsuit Competition. Now here is Preliminary Swimsuit Competition….representing your nation….one state at a time….not obese like the rest of you…and in bikinis….. Alabama – Maine Maryland – New Hampshire New Jersey – Rhode Island South Carolina – Wyoming

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Miss USA 2012 Swimsuit Ready Abs for National Donut DAy of the Day