I always like to say that Australian girls are sluts. Even the hottest of Australians girls is liberal when it comes to getting drunk and fucking people for fun. I always just assume it comes from their reckless criminal in exile roots, you know a people built on social misfits, or maybe they just realize that getting drunk and fucking is the best thing in the fucking world, because I have only met hot Australian girls…and those hot Australian girls have always been drunk…trying to fuck…everyone but me…because I guess no one is really that broken…unless I am paying them…but this isn’t about me, it’s about DAVID HAUSERMAN and his awesome Australian model shoot.
Christmas is happening, right before our very eyes, like clockwork….and LOVE MAGAZINE does an advent calendar to celebrate that…I guess because they are Christian, or clever enough to realize that if they recruit all the hottest models to participate in something like Christmas, the most wonderful time of the year, in panties and dancing….like Day 2′s Lily Aldridge of being married to a rockstar fame that turned into Victoria’s Secret fame….in what I like to think is her best work, because I believe in the Christmas miracle, and the Christmas spirt, even when it is shat on by corporations, and the spirit is designed to sell merchandise to close out the year in strong sales numbers….because I know that with the holidays comes sad and lonely people looking for love I can take advantage of….here’s Day 2…
Lily Aldridge is part of the Victoria’s Secret Mafia, who are out there promoting the whole Victoria’s Secret Fashion show, where they probably make something like 90 percent of their yearly revenue, so they take it very fucking seriously, and we are currently in the period of the build up, where they PR teams get mainstream press, trying to push their angels, I get it. America is dumb, infomercials on network television work if they feature half naked girls…getting everyone excited about janky shit quality sweatshop clothes…available in every mall in America… She’s also spreading her legs in a pantsuit, like she was Hillary Clinton if Hilary Clinton wasn’t a lesbian, and if this was Hustler magazine in the 70s, it’d be porn, but today, it’s just boring…because Lily is boring….
Apparently, this is Virgin Island Virgin who is probably not a Virgin because no one is, especially when she’s working in the modelling industry and models are never virgins, it’s almost a prerequisite that they have herpes that they landed from really rich dudes, or clients who they essentially “escort”, even when they are rich on their own…. That’s not to say that this is model has herpes, or escorts men to events, I don’t even know if this is an actual model, even if it is HANNAH DAVIS …from Sports Illustrated fame….that is hardly even fame… But it could be….some nude selfies that are less skimpy than the bathing suits she’s paid, or asked to wear for photographers…so there’s no scandal here, but we love selfies…so here they are…. She’s 23 and looks 40….When the NUDES are PG-13 – we can assume they are fully staged by the agents… Here’s Hannah…
Lily Aldridge bores me. She’s hardly got a body, but is still an alleged lingerie supermodel because the general public gets sucked into the whole Victoria’s Secret marketing campaign that this brat is a part of… She’s essentially been a scenester who fucks guys in bands, and in doing that, she’s met the key people in her “circle”…and pulled a massive scam…where she went from doing tampax commercials to this…. That’s not to say she’s a horrible person just because she’s connected, even if she’s probably are horrible person…it’s just to say that she’s not that great, despite what we can assume she thinks about herself and now she’s in GQ UK….half naked…like her mom…who was in Playboy…only without the vagina lips…
Victoria’s Secret put out a book for Russell James, their senior photographer, who I guess has been shooting with them for a very very long time, and has got rich and a lot of fucking sex from babes who want to be Victoria’s Secret models, which happens to be every girl in existence…called ANGELS ….featuring their Angels, and now Kendall Jenner, because I guess she’s bought her way into Victoria’s Secret modelling… The launch was last night, I wasn’t invited, obviously, but Getty Images was, so here’s my run down of what you missed… Russell with Branson, because creeper billionaires with private islands like photographers who bring top models there… #455222086 / gettyimages.com Russell with Lima, because there is a bond created when a girl gets half naked and bossed around by a dude with a camera…that involves being allowed to pick her up / cum on her face whenever he wants #455228324 / gettyimages.com Adriana Lima Kissing A Picture of Herself, Something I am sure she does often and everytime she sees a mirror – it’s all part of being an ego #455233980 / gettyimages.com Russell and Sara Sampaio #455224092 / gettyimages.com Three Victoria’s Secret Models…I think Lima is making this event about her… #455223754 / gettyimages.com Russell and Karolina Kurkova #455212502 / gettyimages.com Russell with Kendall Jenner because she pays him to be her photographer #455221934 / gettyimages.com Kendall Jenner with Branson – because her mom taught her how to sniff out money #455205246 / gettyimages.com Candice wasn’t bad…. #455222862 / gettyimages.com But Martha Hunt was the best thing there… #455213390 / gettyimages.com Even when Lima was out trying to steal the spotlight… #455232534 / gettyimages.com Josephine Skriver is good too… #455224056 / gettyimages.com So is Elsa Hosk… #455219334 / gettyimages.com Why wasn’t I invited to this again? Oh right, because Lily Aldridge has hated me since she was an LA groupie doing TAMPON commercials #455218934 / gettyimages.com
See, now here’s why I love supermodels — you know, besides the obvious. Because while the rest of you slobs out there fly in sweatpants (or what I call business casual), they head on planes in skintight leather pants. So here’s Lily Aldridge putting on a solid leg show just leaving the airport, and it’s times like this where I wish I worked in airport security so I could’ve ordered a couple extra pat-downs. For safety reasons, of course. Photos: WENN.com
I’ve done a few posts on Eiza Gonzalez and still I don’t know much about her other than she is a hot piece that I’d like to get a hold of. Here she is heading out with a friend to a club that I probably can’t get into. Bloggers still get no respect! Photos: PacificCoastNews
I don’t know where Lily Aldridge keeps going on all these trips to the airport, but the way she’s been dressing, I hope she keeps racking up those frequent flyer miles. Because every time I’ve ever flown, I always fantasize I’ll get seated next to a hottie like Lily, and even though it’s always a 300-pound fat guy instead, it’s pictures like these that keep that impossible dream alive. Photos: Fameflynet
