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The Real Housewives of Atlanta Recap: Monster Mama

The Real Housewives of Atlanta gave us the saga of the “The Old Lady and the Shoe” but I wish Mama Joyce would just put her shoes back on and walk out the door. We recap the wedding dress drama in our THG +/- review. But first Kandi Burruss takes the girls to a dance class to get them moving but Cynthia Bailey’s sparkles nearly blinded me. Minus 15. Even worse was the close up of Phaedra Parks tummy. Minus 21. The woman just had a baby for goodness sake.  But wait, they’re not done.  Kenya Moore sent rival Phaedra her Booty Bootcamp video after she gave birth. Minus 25. That’s just so wrong.  Does Kenya think that’s cute? Just wait until she has a child, which if her aunt has any say in it will be soon. Since Kenya’s always picking the wrong men, her aunt’s advice is to skip that part and go straight to the baby.  Yes, Kenya seems to do fine with her little dog but a child…I’m not so sure.  Speaking of kids, Cynthia had a sit down with Noelle’s daddy to talk about the girl’s new boyfriend. Plus 42 . Noelle’s a lucky girl. Most kids are lucky to have one parent who is interested. She’s got a mother and two fathers who are actively involved in her life.  NeNe’s planning a girls’ trip to Savannah, Georgia. Plus 50. I love Savannah. I’m just not sure how much I’ll love it after these ladies get through with it.  Brace yourself Savannah. The Housewives are coming. Hopefully Porsha Williams will be able to make it. The stress of the divorce must be taking its toll because she’s been plagued by headaches and she fainted on the stairs.  Maybe it’s a good thing she didn’t move out of her Momma’s. But if Porsha needs to be close to her mother, Kandi needs to run from hers.  Mama Joyce is a complete mess. Who goes to see their daughter try and wedding dresses and says “She ain’t gonna wear it no where” while the girl is in the dressing room. Minus 33. That’s just mean. But Mama Joyce is cruel. She’s a bully, only Kandi’s so used to having it in her life that she just can’t see how bad it really is. Joyce and her sisters came into that bridal salon like a mean spirited little gang and did their best to ruin Kandi’s day. And when Carmon tried to stand up to them, Mama Joyce threatened to beat her with a shoe!  Kandi doesn’t like confrontation so she just backs down to Mama but if she keeps that up Mama Joyce will push Kandi’s best friend and fiance right out of her life. Minus 40 . But that seems to be exactly what Joyce wants. Her daughter to be just as lonely and miserable as she is.  Maybe the ladies can convince Kandi to put her big girl panties on and stand up for herself when they get to Savannah, but after a lifetime of cow-towing to Mama Joyce, I doubt it. Episode total = -42!                                               Season total = -329!

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The Real Housewives of Atlanta Recap: Monster Mama

Candice Swanepoel’s Behind The Scenes Bikini Pics of the Day

BENWATTS is a photographer I’ve been following on the internet for a very long time…he has what the average dude would think is the single best job in the world…if the average man didn’t think photography was for the gays…because he spends his life making tons of money, flying to amazing places, in luxury settings…shooting model babes…who you know look at lot better in pictures than in person…because they are super sized humans…who when standing next to them…you go up to their belly button…making you look like the number 10 walking down the street with them… TO SEE THE MORE – VISIT BENWATTS.com

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Candice Swanepoel’s Behind The Scenes Bikini Pics of the Day

What the Fuck is This of the Day

Sara Tommasi is an italian TV host…who I guess has fallen off and decided to make some serious career moves to matter…and it got my attention because let’s face it..look at her doing whatever she’s doing here and try to deny that it’s one of the single most amazing things you’ve ever seen in your life…it’s the right amount of desperate, disgusting to look at, big nippled, and weird as fuck to suck you in…and make you want to masturbate, just to challenge yourself and see if you can get off…. This is amazing..in a horrible fucking way. TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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What the Fuck is This of the Day

Beach Ballin: King Bey Shares Shots From Costa Rican Carter Family Vacay [Photos]

Must be nice. King Bey shared more photos of her bangin bawwdy, this time from a family vacay in Costa Rica. We’re trying to see if we can we get Bey to take us on the next trip to paradise. Hit the flip for more pics of Bey and the fam having fun in the sun.

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Beach Ballin: King Bey Shares Shots From Costa Rican Carter Family Vacay [Photos]

Clapback: Struggle Bird Kenya Moore Says Apollo Would Have Smashed Her Cakes To Smithereens

Kenya is still stirring the pot. Kenya Says Apollo Was Disrespectful To His Marriage When Apollo said he was texting Kenya for business and not sex we didn’t believe him. Apollo was probably trying to get some on the side… bruh is slick. According to Kenya’s Bravo TV Blog: Watching Apollo repeatedly say he “could have slept with me if he wanted to” and seeing the way he behaves in his marriage just reminds me of how immature, disrespectful, and dishonest he is to his wife, marriage, and in life. Leopards don’t change their spots. Lying landed him in prison. His mouth says one thing, but reality and his character speak volumes: If he could have, he would have. I’m done with this. Do you think Apollo wanted some of Kenya’s scrambled eggs?

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Clapback: Struggle Bird Kenya Moore Says Apollo Would Have Smashed Her Cakes To Smithereens

Cheryl Tweedy’s Cleavage For Charity

As my original future ex-wife, Cheryl Tweedy will always hold a special place in my heart and my sweatpants, even though we never actually got to consummate our fake Internet relationship, and I always ended up having to do it by myself. Anyway, here’s Cheryl looking as good as ever attending the ICAP Charity Day in London. And if she’s still in a giving mood, I know a certain underprivileged blogger who could use some relief from her. As I mentioned earlier, it’s been building up for years. » view all 11 photos Photos: Fameflynet

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Cheryl Tweedy’s Cleavage For Charity

Kimberley Garner Busts Out The Little Chesticles

Here’s my favorite Twitter girlfriend Kimberley Garner at a party for Now Magazine looking as good as ever stuffed into a nice tight dress. Now I know that Kimberley doesn’t have quite as much to stuff as some of the other hot British nobodies out there, but who cares? She’s still smoking hot, and I’m still looking to finally consummate our Twitter relationship, so can somebody please tell Kimberley about all the nice things I’ve been saying about her? I don’t think she’s been listening to me lately. » view all 14 photos Photos: WENN.com

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Kimberley Garner Busts Out The Little Chesticles

Federal Indictment Requires Pregnant Rapper Gucci Mane To Surrender His Guns And Ammo!

If there was EVER a ninja who needed to give up his Glock, it’s Gucci . Gucci Mane Forced To Give Up Guns Under Federal Indictment According to TMZ reports : Gucci Mane’s got a problem with the United States government that goes beyond taxes — it’s like a bullet to the heart … because Uncle Sam wants to take his Glock. According to a federal indictment, the government wants Mane to surrender his 2 guns — a 40 caliber Glock and a 45 caliber Taurus. They also want the ammo that goes with it. As for why the government has a hard-on for Mane … the rapper has 2 priors — aggravated assault with a deadly weapon and possession of more than 20 grams of pot. If Gucci is going to be allowed to walk the streets we sure would feel a helluva lot safer if we know he doesn’t have any firearms on his person.

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Federal Indictment Requires Pregnant Rapper Gucci Mane To Surrender His Guns And Ammo!

Lawsuits: Chubby Chasin’ Brotha Sues MTV For $2.5 Million For Putting His Name And Address On Blast!

MTV is in BIG trouble! Man Sues MTV For Displaying His Name And Address In Chubby Chaser Documentary Via NYDailyNews A Manhattan man who sued because his real-life identity was outed on MTV’s “True Life: I’m a Chubby Chaser” is fat out of luck, a Manhattan judge has ruled. Tristan Watson and roommate Nadine Crosbie filed suit against the reality show’s producers last year, claiming they were duped into thinking their home address would not be shown and that Watson would only be identified by the name “Tee” on the show, which focused on people who intentionally seek out extra-plump partners. But despite verbal assurances and an email from a producer in 2011 telling him not to worry, Watson’s full first name was used on air and an Internet broadcast in 2012 — and the show didn’t do anything to conceal the location of their New York home, the suit said. Their “address and apartment number were clearly, identifiably displayed,” the suit said. The little white lie turned into a big problem for Watson and Crosbie, his outspoken cousin who also appeared on the show. After it aired, the pair said they were harassed and got death threats. Can you imagine how terrifying it would be to have stalker with high cholesterol??? The pair filed suit against MTV and the show’s producers for $2.5 million, charging them with fraud, breach of contract and negligence. The show’s producers said Watson and Crosbie had voluntarily agreed to appear on the show, and signed a release allowing their likenesses to be used and filming to be done at their home. They also agreed not to sue for any reason, the producers said. MTV’s filing noted the pair had participated in the show for “nearly a year” before it aired. In a ruling earlier this month, Manhattan Supreme Court Justice Marcy Friedman threw the suit out, finding the pair’s agreement with the show’s producers didn’t contain any of the guarantees they said they’d been promised. Watson and Crosbie’s lawyer, Romeo Salta, said there are no plans to appeal. Better read that fine print ladies and gentlemen. These networks make you sign a release for a reason! That said, they aired ol’ boy’s gov’t name AND address??? Really, MTV??? SMH Image via MTV

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Lawsuits: Chubby Chasin’ Brotha Sues MTV For $2.5 Million For Putting His Name And Address On Blast!

White Folks Play Different: Beckham Reveals He Had Touch His Peen In Front Of Teammates In Hazing Ritual! [Video]

WTF ?! David Beckham Says He Touched Himself Sexually In Hazing Ritual According to TMZ reports : David Beckham claims he was the victim of a bizarre hazing ritual as a young professional soccer player … in which he had to touch himself sexually in front of his male teammates. Beckham describes the experience in a new documentary called “The Class of 92″ about an iconic generation of soccer stars in England in the 90s. It happened in 1991 — when Beckham was just 16 — and he says he had to stare at a photo of a famous Welsh soccer player named Clayton Blackmore and (more or less) masturbate in front of his teammates. He said, “Everyone had an initiation that you had to go through on the youth team, that was one of the most uncomfortable ones.” He added, “I was embarrassed when I was saying it on camera let alone talking about it more. But it’s something that we all had to go through. It was definitely something I wouldn’t like to go through again!” No need to wonder why soccer isn’t popular amongst American brothas… Image via Splash

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White Folks Play Different: Beckham Reveals He Had Touch His Peen In Front Of Teammates In Hazing Ritual! [Video]